Lila

​​

She woke in the dark. A thick, plush blanket laid over her that she didn't remember. She was confused for a moment about where she was, and what time it was.

The clock next to the bed said it was after eleven. And a couple of blinks helped her recognize the door to the bathroom, and back into the living area.

She was in the Penthouse.

The whole place was dark and silent, except for the light glowing outside the windows behind her because she hadn't closed the curtains. When she rolled over, her breath caught.

Dane stood, naked, in front of the window, silhouetted by the lights of the city in front of him.

"You're back!" she said quietly, getting out of bed and going to him, putting herself between him and the window he'd been staring out. She wrapped her arms around his waist and hugged him. He put his arms around her and kissed the top of her head, but he didn't take his eyes off the city.

"I'm sorry I woke you," he said quietly.

"Don't be silly. I'm glad you're here—have you been at work this whole time?"

"Until a few minutes ago." His voice was weary and sad.

They held each other for a minute, but Lila was getting more and more worried. He wasn't that empty husk she'd seen before. But he looked exhausted and worried and just… not good.

She pulled her head off his chest and looked up at him. "Why do you look at the lights so much?" she asked because she didn't know how else to start.

He rubbed her arms as he spoke, his eyes dark in the glow of the city lights. "It just looks peaceful. You can't hear anything. Even though there's movement, we're up here and away from it. It makes me feel… safe," he said a little sheepishly. "Or maybe just separate? I don't know. I just feel better when I look out there. Like we're hidden from it all. Even if we aren't."

She put a hand to his face and pulled him down. He kissed her with feeling, but when she tried to deepen it, he slowed and pulled back.

"What's wrong?" she asked.

"Nothing new," he muttered. "I'm just tired and we've been planning. It takes a while for my brain to shut off. I'm always trying to figure out of if I've missed something."

"Even if you have, someone else will catch it, Dane. That's why these men are on your team. They know what they're doing."

He nodded, but his heart wasn't in it. He looked out again as if he didn't want to be looking at her reaction when he said, "Well, on that note, Chris had an interesting idea and I think we should probably listen to it."

The casual tone he'd adopted was completely fake. She tensed. "What is it?"

Dane cleared his throat and kept rubbing her arms. "He said even though things are serious, we should keep up the façade of you being a casual girlfriend. A workplace fling. There's nothing in the public yet that tells anyone anything else. And if Dad's watching… it might hold him off a little longer. He might want to wait until we get serious. So… I think you should keep the apartment. At least, as far as the staff know. Just in case."

She let go of his waist and stepped back, folding her arms. "You didn't tell him about the wedding?" The thought was a spear to her gut. She'd thought they were done hiding. He'd said they were done hiding!

"Chris knows," he said, finally looking at her. "But he raised this idea when I told him I hadn't announced because we were getting the legal stuff sorted out and… it made sense. If the staff don't know, they can't tell anyone. And I just…" he rubbed his face with both hands. "God, Lila, I'm just terrified and I don't know what the right thing is anymore. The only thing I know is that a public announcement will up the stakes. Dad will know I'm all in. He'll know how much you mean to me. If he thinks things are casual, maybe he just tries to buy you off, or scare you, like he did with the others. But if knows you're my wife…"

She was so torn. He looked desperate and afraid and she wanted to comfort him. But he was doing it again—trying to control everything. Determined to hide. "You're letting him rule your life again," she said, half-pleading, half-pissed off.

"No, I'm not," he said through his teeth and his eyes finally locked on hers, flashing. "I'm making decisions for your safety."

"It's the same thing!"

"No, it's not!" He put his hands on her shoulders and leaned down in her face. "Fuck, Lila, you don't realize what he's capable of! He will slit your throat and laugh about it, do you get that?! That's not a metaphor. He did it to his own daughter. Do you think he'd hesitate with you?"

Her heart raced. "No, I don't!" she snapped. "But you know what else I think he won't hesitate at? Killing you if he can't get to me. And if all we're doing is hiding and pretending, and focusing all that energy on me, what happens when he can't get to me, Dane? What happens to you?"

"I can take care of myself."

"Bullshit!" she yelled. "No one's taken care of you your whole life—including you—and here we are. I will not sit in prison while you work yourself to the bone until you start making mistakes and he gets a shot at you instead, Dane. I won't do it! I won't let you do it!"

She couldn't bear the pain in his eyes, so she pushed out of his arms and away from him, planning to circle the bed and head to the massive closet where she'd put her bag. She was going to get dressed.

But Dane came after her, took her hand and said her name in a pained voice and, damn her, she couldn't hurt him like that. She couldn't keep walking away.

So she stopped. But she didn't turn.