Dane

That tone on his father—like he was being patient, like it was a struggle for him, almost sent Dane over the edge. He clenched his hands to fists. "I haven't been pretending anything to you about my feelings for her," he snarled. "They're why I'm here. You know that. But you'll forgive me if I also don't want to discuss them."

​​

His father nodded. "Yes, I will forgive you," he said. "I'm not without an awareness of love, son. An appreciation for it—and the frustrations that come with it. You know that. The past ten years have been very hard for me. There has been a lack because of your absence. I didn't like it. I am very glad that you're here."

Dane swallowed. It was true, his father loved him. At least, whatever form of emotion that his father called love, he had that for Dane. But to his father, love meant control—so he used the love of others against them, and attempted to force his own into submission. He saw love as a weakness—which was what had driven this vendetta for the past decade, Dane knew. But to hear his father say it… it was the strangest mix of repulsion and joy he'd ever experienced.

There was still a part of him, deep down, that ached for his father's approval. For the unity and comradery they'd enjoyed when he was a teen. And yet… his father disgusted him. Used people like toilet paper, and had no respect for life…

It was confusing as all hell and Dane didn't want to think about it. So he just nodded. "I know," he said, trying to keep himself from sounding angry about it.

"You know, love is partly Chris's driver, too?" His father said kindly, as if he were offering parental advice.

Dane glared. "Do not speak to me about Chris."

His father smirked. "You do not need to worry. He truly cares for Lila. He won't allow anything to happen to her."

"It's not her protection I'm concerned about."

"No, I suppose not," his father said, chuckling. "You know, I find what you're willing to do for her curious. It's true I've wanted women before, even felt an urge to keep them safe from others." Dane almost laughed—his father didn't want to protect. He wanted to own. He separated his women from others because in his mind, they belonged to him. "But this obsession you have," his father went on, "this willingness to be hurt for her. I don't understand it. I wouldn't allow another human being that kind of control over me."

Dane almost did it. He almost pointed out the obsession his father had with him, how it had driven his father's decisions and resources for years. But knowing that his dad wasn't aware of it, didn't see it in himself… he didn't think it was a good idea to make the connection. He might find his father a lot less forgiving if he did.

"I don't expect you to understand it, Dad," he said, and his voice sounded tired. "But it means that you can trust me. Because as long as you're keeping her safe, I'm keeping you safe."

"And if I stop? Protecting her, I mean," his father raised a single eyebrow.

Dane's jaw went so tight it ached. "If you hurt her, I will destroy everything around you for as long as I can before you kill me," he said.

His dad tilted his head and stared. "And yet, you want me to trust you."

Dane nodded. "What's the term? Mutually assured destruction. We'll both help each other because it's in our best interests to do so."

"You are fascinating, son. Every time you do something to give me hope that we might be in this together, you say something like that and I'm reminded that you're not here by choice. Perhaps it's not Felix? Perhaps it's you who has the plot?"

Dane snorted to cover the shot of adrenalin that pumped through him at the predatory light in his father's eyes. "I haven't lied to you once about why I'm here, or what I'm doing. As long as you take care of her, you're my favorite person in the world. The rest? Us? We'll figure it out. I wasn't lying about being sick of fighting the monster in me, either. I might not be you, dad, but… I'd enjoy the chance to flex sometimes. Work out some of my frustrations—"

His father burst into laughter. Dane was confused—he hadn't meant to be funny. So he just waited.

His father settled quickly, but was still smiling. "And just like that, you put me at ease again. You're almost as good as me at manipulating the feelings of others, Dane. I taught you better than I thought."

"I told you: I was well trained."

"Yes, you did. Okay, well, this has been very eye-opening. But I do have work I need to do."

"What about Felix?"

His father's eyes glinted. "Like I said, keep listening to him. Find out his plan. And fill me in. We'll figure it out as we go. And I'll tell him you were here to check on Lila and… flex, like you said," he chuckled. "It's not unlike you to force me to deal with you just because you can."

"But what was the catalyst? Why did I come for you? Because he'll know I didn't just do that out of the blue."

His father blinked. "Oh, didn't I tell you? She got the video yesterday. That very special one that you enjoyed so much. And you knew that was going to… create an issue. You wanted to make sure it was worth it."

Dane went cold, but held himself together. "I didn't have second thoughts, Dad."

"No. But like I said, you wanted to make sure your sacrifice was worth it. That she was starting to pull away. That it was working."

Dane took a deep breath. "And is it?"

"Yes, I believe it is." All amusement had left his father's tone. "How do you feel about that?"

Dead. Numb. That was how Dane felt. "Fine," he said. "Like I said, mutually assured destruction."

His father just nodded.

As Dane turned to leave, his father said quietly behind him, "I'm going to let you keep the gun, Dane. For now. I don't want to leave you helpless in this den."

Dane just kept walking.

*****

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