Author's note: this is from Seraphina's point of view

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After the Immersion nightclub, Duke and I came to my apartment.

I called Maria in advance, asking her to prepare a meal. I can go without food, but Duke can't, and considering that we didn't eat at Magda's party and that we went dancing after that, I didn't want Duke to sleep on an empty stomach. The man likes to eat.

Duke grinned victoriously and gave me a smacking kiss on the lips when I handed him the card key for the underground parking.

Silly man. It doesn't take much to make him happy.

That same card key can operate the elevator of my apartment building, unlock the door of my apartment, and allow him to pass through the protective arrays.

Of course, he didn't know about the arrays, but I was preparing myself to tell him about everything. Soon.

We had dinner on the rooftop terrace.

Soft music was playing and there were candles for a romantic mood.

Duke was praising Ash's performance at Eclipse and as much as I was interested in that, my mind was wandering toward something else.

I thought that it will be easy to tell Duke that my strange disease is cured (aka I can prevent vitality from leaving my body). I had everything figured out.

During a romantic dinner at my place, I tell him that there is one more thing for us to celebrate, and he will ask what it is, then I say: "I'm cured!"

Simple, right?

However, now that I was facing him, I realized how that is technically giving him the green light for us to go all the way and I found myself tongue-tied.

Do I want to go all the way with Duke? Absolutely!

Do I want to tell him that? Absolutely not!

Ah, why am I such a wimp?

Just say it. SAY IT!

I couldn't do it. Just thinking about it made me feel queasy.

"Is everything OK? Am I boring you?", Duke asked.

Ah, he noticed that I was absentminded! And my expression was probably not good either.

"No, no. Tonight was eventful, and I'm tired. That's all."

A lame excuse, but he bought it.

"Oh, sorry about that. I got carried away with talk and forgot about the time. Let's finish this and call it a night."

He scarfed down food from his plate, and I feared that he will choke but before I could tell him to slow down, his plate was clean.

"Is this how you usually eat?", I blurted out, still shocked by the speed he inhaled the food.

Duke lowered the wine glass that was touching his delicious lips and looked at me innocently. "You told me you are tired, so I hurried. It would be a waste to leave this tasty food. Are you going to finish that?" He pointed at my plate.

The bundle of nerves in my stomach dissolved with a wave of giggles that burst from me. He was adorable.

We took turns showering and getting ready for bed.

I squirmed under the cover while listening to the sound of water running on the other side of the door, and when silence permeated the room, my stomach tied into knots again.

Duke paused at the door of the bathroom and smiled at me.

"I thought you will be sleeping by now."

Duke's sweatpants and a t-shirt didn't conceal his impressing physique and I did my best to maintain eye contact.

"I was waiting for you.", I responded, and his smile told me that he liked what he heard.

Duke turned off the main light, leaving only the bedside lamp that was set on dim lighting, before joining me under the cover.

His arms wrapped around me naturally and he kissed my temple. A light kiss.

I was lost in Duke's scent and his embrace that felt like home. I rested my hands on his body and confirmed that every part of him is firm, other than his soft lips and silky hair.

"Good night, beautiful…", he murmured.

I looked up at him and blinked.

Get it out, Serina! Say it!

"Is there something on your mind?", he asked, and I nodded in response.

"Tell me.", he urged me.

I opened my mouth to speak, but the words refused to form as shyness swelled inside me. Damn it!

If I can't tell him, I can show him.

I moved higher and kissed him. Once, twice… and then Duke gave in, and I felt familiar warmth pooling at my core as he claimed my lips with his. Hungry, intense, mind-numbing.

My hands disappeared under his t-shirt, and I explored the glorious landscape of his back.

Duke broke the kiss which robbed us both of our breaths.

"We should sleep.", his words tickled my lips.

I knew why he stopped.

At the risk of becoming a giant crepe again, I clung to him tightly. "No need."

Duke's handsome brows came together when he felt my hands moving toward the waistband of his sweatpants. "You are sick."

"I'm not."

Duke paused. "What?"

I swallowed a mouthful of air. "The last few results came normal, so…"

There, I said it!

I paused when I saw Duke grimacing like he is in pain. Now what?

"Shit!", he cursed under his breath, and my shyness turned from confusion into worry.

What's up with that reaction?

I thought he wanted me to get better so that we can make love in every way imaginable until we both collapse, and then some more. Those were his words. Did he lie to me?

Duke exhaled sharply and avoided my gaze guiltily.

I couldn't take this anymore. "What?"

Duke started inching away from me. When he moved the cover to get out of the bed, I panicked and grabbed his arm.

"What's going on? I thought you will be happy that I'm fine."

"Condoms.", he said.

I didn't get it. "What?"

Duke turned to me. "I didn't know you are better, so I didn't bring any with me. But don't worry. I will go and buy some. I will be back before you know it. I need to find a store that is open at this hour."

Discussing condoms with Duke was embarrassing, but I was touched that he was thinking about protection. He always put me first, even at a time like this.

My grip on his arm tightened. I had no intention of letting him leave the bed or the bedroom.

"Do you have some disease?", I asked.

Duke frowned. "No. But I'm not sure what you think about pregnancy. I mean, I would love to have a bunch of kids with you, but we just got together, so maybe it's too soon."

His words hit me like a sledgehammer.

Kids. He would love a bunch of kids.

How can I tell him that for the last three years I didn't have a single period?

"I can't have kids." I forced words to leave my mouth.

Duke's eyebrows shot up. "Are you on a pill?"

He misunderstood again. But maybe that's one more misunderstanding I can clarify later.

I knew it was not fair to hide this from Duke, especially if he hopes for a future with kids which I can't give him. But for tonight, I was selfish, and I didn't want him to think less of me.

"Something like that."

Duke turned toward me, and he observed my face keenly, like he was trying to see what's beneath the surface.

His tongue darted to moisten his scrumptious lips and he swallowed hard before speaking slowly in a hoarse voice, "Are you saying that we are good to go, and we can go raw?"

My face was burning fiercely, and I could only imagine how red I was.

I knew that open communication is necessary for a healthy relationship, but… "When you talk about it like that, it kills the romance."

Duke's lips stretched into a grin. "I will take that as a 'yes' and 'yes'."

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