The next two days were hectic. I interviewed several rugby wives and talked to a few of the kids who were old enough to tell me about being in a rugby family. I ate dinner each night with Joel. Besides a gentle hand on my back or holding hands, he didn't touch me until we said goodnight. His way of saying goodbye reminded me he was interested in being more than friends. I went to bed remembering the sexy press of his lips to minehis scent and erotic grumbles as he took small nips from my neck. There was no such thing as dry panties when Joel kissed me goodnight.

The subject of his brother never came up. Van didn't come back, and I stayed away from the stadium. The rumors about me and Van worried me, but Joel never said anything. When I was with him, people, including women, were always friendly. I thought I received a few measured stares, but I knew it could also be that I was self-conscious.

I managed to find two additional bras at the local mall. They weren't the prettiest, but they weren't white and they had padded shoulder straps, so I had no severe indents in my skin when I removed it at night. Joel, ever the gentleman, kept his eyes on mine after his first perusal when we saw each other.

I visited Charlie on Thursday afternoon and he proudly showed me his printer. She was a beaut and just the heavy sound of rhythmic clatter and the smell of paper and ink delivered a special thrill deep inside of me. There was something about his operation that reminded me of my studies in college and learning about the days when newspapers kept the country in tune. I had a great visit.

After kissing me goodnight, Joel gave me an updated schedule for Friday through Sunday with the bus departure times. I had to be at the stadium at seven the following morning. I packed my bag, including my washed Slam t-shirt. Stub had me bring my clothes to her house and she washed everything for me. I argued and lost. She was a stubborn little thing and I didn't have a chance. She would be at the game Saturday with Charlie. She loaned me one of her old cameras for pictures on the bus if any sale-worthy muscle shots popped up.

"You know," she said, "sleeping, stretching, showing skin- that kind of thing."

I was far from a professional photographer, but I was game. The pictures sold for a good cause. Speaking with several children involved in the youth program changed my mind about the importance of sports in general. They dreamed of playing college rugby and even told me what they wanted to major in. Mike's oldest, an eight-year-old, wanted to be a dentist. Rugby kept these kids in shape and gave them something to strive for. This was a complete one-eighty for me. I was such a quiet, shy child, and though I remember being happy, nothing compared to the excitement these kids had about rugby.

I slept fitfully, waking up several times thinking about Joel and Van. I arrived at the stadium ten minutes early with my lack-of-sleep cranky pants on. The guys were throwing their bags in the storage compartment beneath the bus. I removed mine from my trunk and didn't realize anyone was around until Van grabbed it out of my hands.

"I know you don't want to talk to me, but we can at least be friends." He started walking to the bus.

I grabbed my scrap bag and laptop following close behind. Funny how the sight of his muscles did nothing for me today. "I can roll my bag," I said in frustration. He didn't look back.

Several players greeted me with a good morning as a few stared between me and Van. I took a quick look around for Joel but didn't see him.

Van grabbed my hand. "Come on, you're sitting with me."

I tried to shake his hand off, but his grip only tightened. I couldn't believe he was doing this in front of his teammates. "I am not sitting with you," I whispered under my breath.

Again, he ignored me. We rounded the side of the bus and Joel was standing there. I jerked my arm and pushed Van a little. Shit, Joel's face went red. Van stopped at the same time Joel stepped behind him and hooked his arm around my waist. Instant relief washed over me until Joel's stiff body and rapid breathing clued me in that it wasn't over.

Van looked at Joel's hand. His smile turned unpleasant. "So tell me, bro, how'd you manage to stake your claim between Monday night and this morning?"

Oh shit.

Joel's body stiffened even further. He turned to me, his voice clipped. "Get on the bus, Cami." He moved slightly, blocking me from Van while giving me room to go up the steps.

I wasn't sure what to do until I saw Mean Mike hovering behind Joel. He nodded his head to the bus. I hoped this meant he had Joel's back. I couldn't help the pissed off look I cast Van's way. I walked up the steps, headed three seats down, and sat where I could see outside. Mike stood between the brothers.

Van put his hands up and smiled. "Just thought she'd like to sit with someone she knew, but obviously she knows us both intimately."

Mike shoved Joel back. Van just laughed as several more players grabbed Joel.

Mike was in Joel's face. "Save it for the fucking field. You can kill each other afterwards."

Van walked up the bus steps as the guys calmed Joel down. Thankfully, one of the players followed directly behind Van.

Van gave me an assessing look without saying a word. He sat in the first seat, two seats up from me. Mike came on the bus next and smiled my way. Joel was next. I was worried he wouldn't sit anywhere near me. The significance of Monday night had to register with him. We needed to talk, but it wouldn't happen during a half-day bus ride. He sat down beside me without looking in my direction. His exposed arm muscles remained tight, the veins prominent. I didn't think I could do this. We'd be sitting next to each other for hours. My head dropped and I stared down at my hands while other players entered the bus. It was happening againmy need to pull my arms and legs into my shell and hide.

The bus finally pulled away. From the corner of my eye, I watched Joel shift his ball cap low over his face, put his seat back, and close his eyes. In desperation, I dug through my bag and found my old iPod and headphones. The iPod was a sixteenth birthday present from my parents. It had Sweet Sixteen, love Mom and Dad engraved on the back. I found the playlist I wanted and turned it on. My eyes closed as I tried to escape into the sound. A tear slipped down my cheek and I worried a major meltdown was seconds away. Joel's warm fingers grasped mine.

He pulled my earbud out and whispered, "Shh, we'll talk later." He gave my hand a brief squeeze and replaced the earbud.

I breathed deeply, grateful that he was at least speaking to me.

We stopped for lunch, giving everyone a chance to stretch their legs. The team had clearly eaten there before, because several people applauded when we walked into the diner. Joel led me over to the last two counter seats as other players grabbed booths. I didn't see Van.

I ordered a hamburger and fries, too depressed to eat a salad. If I gained twenty pounds maybe all my man trouble would go away. I almost laughed aloud. They say when you lose weight you lose it in your boobs first. So that means if I gain it there first I'll need a cane to walk.

Joel ordered a French dip sandwich and a hamburger. An older man sat down next to him and began a conversation about this year's chances for the championship. It meant Joel could ignore me without trying. Besides his whispered words and small squeeze to my hand, he hadn't touched me.

I finished my burger and headed to the ladies' room. I applied a little makeup, ran a small brush through my hair, and walked out. Van was waiting. Shit. I almost backed up and returned to the bathroom, but I needed to handle this and not allow my insecurities to push me down.

"Leave me alone, Van," I said in a normal voice unwilling to whisper.

His face was tense; a muscle ticked in his jaw. "I asked you that first night after dinner what was up with you and my brother. You denied even knowing him. I wouldn't have touched you if you'd been honest, but I guess you decided you wanted us both. Does my brother have any idea what a slut you are?"

I slapped him. Not the kind of slap you read about in romance books. The kind of slap that left my hand feeling like a thousand pins pushed through it at once. He grabbed me when I went to hit him again.

"Feel better?" He moved closer so his face was inches from mine. "You're a little firecracker and I don't think my brother can handle you. When you figure that out, I'll be waiting. Maybe after a few times, I can fuck you out of my system completely."

He blocked my knee, which was heading to his balls. I almost screamed out in frustration, but a large hand landed on Van's shoulder. My breath left in a whoosh of relief when I realized it was Mike.

He was angry, but he spoke softly looking straight at me. "Go find Joel while I have a talk with Van." I didn't wait around.

Joel was outside talking to a few people, obviously fans. He inspected me from head to toe when I practically ran out of the restaurant. I think I could have carried it off, but his brother stormed out after me with Mike on his heels. So much for Mike's talk. I headed to the bus, letting my anger take over. I was here to do a job and all I'd done was hide away in my seat like I'd done something wrong. Well I had. I slept with the wrong fucking brother, but to hell with it. Van couldn't think any worse of me and what I really cared about was what Joel thought.

Joel entered the bus a minute after me. I was in his seat pulling my recorder from my bag, which was lying on my seat.

"You okay?" He smoothed his hand over my back.

I looked at him over my shoulder. "I'm fine. I need to interview some of the guys, so I'm going to move around a bit once the bus takes off." My next words were totally unfair, but I was still pissed at Van. "Do you have a problem with that?"

His hand left my back and he gave me a long probing look. "Do I need to kick my brother's ass before he gets back on the bus?"

I stomped my foot, acting like a complete dork. "Save your macho violence for the field. I can handle myself."

Joel backed up. "Then I'll take the inside seat so you can move around."

"Thank you." And I meant it.