She was worried that she is only using Han Chen as an excuse to fill the missing piece so she can completely forget about Chen Kai, the fact that Chen Kai wasn't with her when she met Han Chen made her unable to confirm if he is really just a substitute for her.

Even when she kissed him, the feeling still lingers on her lips but why does it feel like she did it just to find solace and lie to herself that she can move on from Chen Kai, at this moment, she wonders what really hurt her, is it her pride....everyone compliments her beauty and most men can't take their eyes off her so she must have expected Chen Kai to be incapable of leaving her or is it the feeling of betrayal after giving hundred per cent of her trust to him...oh wait...it was never hundred per cent.

​​

{Chen Kai....I always knew that side of him exists, his dreams and ambitions...I knew it from the moment he hid me behind him instead of introducing me to his mother back in uni...}

With her eyes shut, she raised the glass to her lips and scorned herself as she placed the wine glass back on the tray.

She attended their engagement but she couldn't bring herself to stay especially with the many eyes watching her to find a hint of jealousy and misery on her face, she had to smile the entire time but she couldn't do that anymore so she left the place and returned to the hospital...taking advantage of him once again.

Every time she tries to think about the possibility of her and Han Chen being together, Chen Kai always finds his way into her thought.

[Enough!}

She cautioned herself, all these thoughts invading her head only makes her feel miserable and that she has never tasted so she brushed the thoughts off.

My love is calling you!

My love is calling you!

My love is calling you!

She shot her eyes open, it has been a while since she heard that ringing tone, she used to use it for his calls only but after he left for his training, she removed it but when he returned, she used it again.

"I must have forgotten to remove it," she picked up her phone and stared at the screen with 'my love' and love emoji's on the screen.

{He is already engaged but why is he calling me especially after so long,} she hissed inwardly and placed her finger on the red symbol on the screen but she couldn't lift her finger to cut the call, why....the sudden urge to know why he called her filled her mind.

"Why is he making things so complicated for me?" she cursed herself in her mind for being so stupid but she couldn't bring herself to cut the call so she gently lifted her hand off the screen and picked up the call.

She waited for him to speak.

"H-Hello..." the drawly voice spoke

"Why are you calling me?" she questioned in a voice as cold as possible while tensing her facial muscles.

"Y-Yu Yan...is that you--" a retching sound followed his drunk voice.

She moved the phone away from her ear and placed it back, with her face filled with worry.

"Where are you?"

"You don't have to worry about me---I just had a few drinks, you know how much of a drinker I am---" the retching sound came again, the bartender at the bar snatched his phone.

"H-Hello," a strange voice spoke, she furrowed her brows.

"Who is this?" she questioned

"Your boyfriend is drunk and he seems like he is about to vomit, please come pick him up," the bartender pleaded out of fear that he will soon vomit and ruin the whole atmosphere in a high-class bar.

"Address?"

"Swiss bar at...." she cut the call and quickly hurried out of the bath, she wore her bathrobe as quick as she could then left the bathroom.

She wore the simplest and nearest cloth she could find then grabbed her coat and car keys, as she got to the entrance, she inserted her feet in whatever footwear she saw at the entrance but she didn't care to know what it is.

She got into her car and drove as fast as she could, even slamming her brake at a short distance when the traffic light turns red and speeding up again when it turns green.

{I was right....in my heart, Han Chen is just a substitute piece to fill the hole Chen Kai left}

The truth hit her harder than she thought it would.

She felt angry at herself and sorry for Han Chen, she blamed herself for even picking the call in the first place and she feared what would happen when she sees him.

She got to the bar in no time, she hurried out of her car and entered the bar with her eyes scanning everywhere for him but she soon found him seated in front of the bar with his hands still fiddling with a glass of beer.

She appeared in his front and snatched the cup from his hand then she took his arm and placed his around her neck and tried to lift him up but he turned to her with his face showing that he is clearly wasted.

"Oh...Yu Yan, what are you doing here?" he drunkenly questioned with his index finger pointing at her, she sighed and looked away from him.

"Do you need me to help you?" the bartender asked.

"No, thank you," She held his hands firmly and carried him out of the bar, she dropped him in the shotgun seat and entered the driver's seat, she searched his pocket for his phone, when she found it she checked his GPS for his house address.

She knows he has his own personal house but he never goes there unless he needs to get away from his parents and she never asked him where it is.

After finding the address, she started driving, they got to his apartment in no time, she carried him into the elevator but she didn't know what number to press.

"What floor is your apartment on?" she questioned, hoping he can still answer her in his wasted state.

"Huh---eleventh oh no---the twelfth floor, wait...is it the thirteenth floor?" he itched his head to remember with an idiotic smile on his face, she sighed in frustration then glared at him.

"Oh-I remember now, the twenty-fifth floor,"

She annoyingly pressed the button then she folded her arms but he almost dropped to the floor so she had no choice but to hold him up, they got to his apartment but she found that she needed to open the apartment with a password.

"Your password..." she turned around to wait for him to put it in.

He pressed the buttons then the door opened but he turned to her.

"The password is your birthday,"

She slowly turned to face him, she never knew he used her birthday as the password to his apartment but knowing that somehow makes her feel...

"Change it,"

She turned around to leave but he held her hand, she turned to him with an irritated look in her eyes, it really annoys her that even after all he did, he is still leaving traces of her in his life while she also has traces of him in her life- Ridiculous.

"I need a cup of water," he drunkenly said.

"Are you drunk, I almost forget you are wasted, this is your house so get the water yourself," she wanted to leave but he still held her hand tightly.

"I am drunk, how do I know where the water is?"

She was speechless hearing him admit he is drunk but she decided to just do as he wants and leave as soon as possible, he led her to his room where he slumped on the bed then she brushed her hair back in frustration and left the room to get him a cup of water.

She poured the water into a glass cup and returned to the room, after he finished drinking the water, she took the glass from him and glanced at him for the last time before she leaves but as soon as she turned, he held her wrist.

She felt her entire body freeze, she should push his hands away and storm out of his apartment but strangely she can't bring herself to do that.

"Don't go...." he muttered, gripping her hand tightly. She lifted her chin and shut her eyes tightly to resist the temptation to be coerced by him.

With resolution, she took a step forward but he pulled her wrist, causing her to fall on the bed then he placed his hands at both sides, pinning her to the bed.

She started pushing him away but he wouldn't budge, instead he kept his eyes fixed on hers while she averted his gaze.

"Stop...." he hissed with a hint of warning residing in his voice, she is not a weak person but she found herself doing as he says with her eyes still averting his gaze.