《Classless Ascension 》Chapter 150: Josh The Yoga Master!
Advertisement
*Warning: Graphic Heartwarming Slice of Life.*
****
"Wake up, you lazy bum! It's time for school!" Early in the morning, a sonorous shout echoed in the tiny apartment.
Josh had just woken up himself. He had dreamt of fighting a big horse, but the memory of it was already hazy. He busied himself getting breakfast ready.
A tiny girl could be seen exiting her tiny 'room', rubbing her eyes with a slight smile. She dragged her duck slippers on the ground before finally stopping at the small table. As she took her seat, she raised an eyebrow, amused.
"Josh, you sure are energetic this morning."
While she said so, she sneakily attacked the chocolate milk on the table, taking a sip. She then gave a sigh of satisfaction as she looked like a mischievous imp. Josh lightly protested.
"Hey, that's mine! Anyway, hurry up and get dressed. We have to leave soon." He pointed at her current outfit, a duck pajama. She had a few of those animal ones.
"Hm, but this outfit is the peak of human wisdom! It combines the fierceness of ducks with a cute design that none can disregard! It adds +33 to Comfy Sleep and +66 to Style!" She argued.
"Oh? Is that so? Then I suggest you put on your school clothes that will add +34 to Comfy Studying and +67 to Smartness!" He laughingly replied as he handed her his specialty: breakfast sandwich—lots of delicious stuff with enough hot peppers to kill (or close).
She happily began devouring it before she paused for a second to ask him a question. "Josh, I had a friend at school that was saying I was weird for eating hot peppers at breakfast. Why is it that some people hate such things?"
"I'd say a mix of social construct and personal preferences. Breakfast itself and what it should consist of is just cultural. We as a society determine what is appropriate and not to eat, but frankly, you should think about it yourself."
"I should determine what to eat for breakfast, you mean? Of course, since I have an amazing taste in food!"
"I meant it in general. In life, you'll come across many things that you and everyone will just take for granted. It's fine to go with the flow, but only if you think it is right. So what if eating cool food makes people think of you as weird? Does it hurt anyone? Nope!"
Advertisement
"Then why are there people that never eat spicy food?"
"Well, you know how it makes you feel the burn? Well, everyone feels that. It's just that some people enjoy it and some don't. I've read that it's both mental and a matter of habits, the more used you are to eating it, the easier. Apparently, it also releases endorphins."
"That's the drug of happiness, right?"
"Exactly. Alright, enough chitchat. Your sister left me in charge while she's helping her friend! I will accomplish my duty and—" That's when he stopped for the little one was giggling so hard she made her chair tremble.
"There is no school today. It's a national Holiday! You know what day it is too?!" There were stars in her eyes. He took a few instants to think.
"The day that dog rescue lady told you we could come to visit, right?" Josh finally remembered.
"Yes, exactly! I know you need to leave soon! Don't worry about me. I'll be fine. There is Mister Igloo on the other side if there is an issue. Plus, I'm super smart, beautiful, and amazing." She showed such a smug expression! Soon, he was done getting ready.
"Alright, I'll be back later! Take care!" He crossed the door and waited until she locked it behind him. Now, he just needed to knock on the door of Mister Igloo to ask him if he could leave her in his care.
He was lucky to have a caring neighbor who would watch over the little one whenever they needed a babysitter (which didn't happen often).
The man had a heart of gold but was a bit of an eccentric. He even had a collection of polar bear plushies and figurines. He was obsessed with them!
Professionally he fixed various household appliances. But, he mostly took care of fridges and air conditioners at work, hence the nickname. He was the one that had volunteered to help them.
Josh raised his hand about to knock on the man's door but stopped. This scene felt so right, but it wasn't real. He understood it from that feeling of bittersweet happiness deep inside him. He took a moment to compose himself. Since this was but a figment of his imagination, he wouldn't even bother going to work.
Advertisement
He pictured himself hitting the 'Pass Time' option in an RPG. You know, the kind that often failed because there were enemies nearby. Then he observed the window at the end of the hallway. From it shined a bit of light.
That is when he had the feeling that the entire Earth flipped over. The light became brighter and brighter until it began to dim. Soon enough, it was late in the afternoon. Josh turned around and reopened their door.
There she stood. Motionless, right in front of the entrance and akin to a ghost haunting the living. But, her eyes were sparkling. How long had she stood there? She did a salute and exclaimed excitedly:
"Dog Loving Princess reporting for duty! Let us inspect that one dog shelter. It's to make sure everything is in order, of course!" She tried looking serious, but her smile was bigger than that of a shark.
She extended her hand akin to a princess while giggling. Coarse skin met very delicate skin, as Josh swore to himself it would remain like this. He wouldn't let her go through too much adversity. That is how they went for a walk. On the way, he could hear her hum.
People would look at them walk on the street. Some smiled, seeing how cute and cheerful she was. Some disapprovingly shook their heads. He could hear them whisper things like:
"A father at such a young age, what a shame." An old woman sighed.
"Talk about poor! These are all cheap second-hand clothes. That pink color on that hoody is even fading." A haughty middle-aged woman scoffed.
"Tch, he has a kid? I wonder how ugly his broad is. Probably Hella, looking at his face!" A young man sneered.
Josh just kept walking peacefully and glanced at the little one. She was smirking. That's when she added without lowering her voice, "These people really are dumb, aren't they? This is why dogs are better. They're smarter."
The young man heard it, and his face became quite spectacular. A little more, and it would have taken all the colors of the rainbow! He then widened his shoulders, he slightly brought his chest out, and he began to angrily power walk to them.
"Hey, kid! Watch your damn mouth. This isn't— Eeek!" All it took was one look from Josh to shatter his momentum. Then he slowly crumpled to the floor, crying and shaking.
The little one was looking at Josh, her mouth wide open and her eyes even shinier. It was as if she had discovered that he was a real-life superhero. "How did you do that?!"
Josh took a mysterious air as if it was an unspeakable secret. Then he faked to be torn internally about whether to tell her or not. After a few seconds of obviously painful hesitation, he slowly approached her, whispering in her ear.
"It's classified information, but I've been doing yoga in secret. You definitely can't tell a soul! You'll even have to bring this key information to your grave in a few thousand years!" He gravely looked at her.
"A few thousand years?! Anyway, don't try to fool me! How is yoga even related? Also, you just stood there, no yoga involved!"
"That's where you're wrong! I was showing a perfect mountain pose right there! He knew that if he angered me, I would take out the big guns!" He had always wondered why standing straight was called a pose.
"What big guns?!"
"You know, scary stuff: Downward Facing Dog Split, Cat Cow Stretch, Cobra Pose, Happy Baby Pose, Orange Mouse Running In A Green Pasture Under aThe Vast Blue Sky pose. You know, that kind of stuff." He shrugged.
"HAHAHA! What's with these names?!" She couldn't take it anymore.
"Why are you laughing? This is serious!" Josh reiterated.
"Of course! I believe you." She nodded with all the seriousness she could muster.
"Alright, shall we go?"...
Creator's Thought
Fun fact, there were people with the <Yoga Master> Class. Let that sink in. It was similar to a dancer that would captivate its audience through a rhythmic and well-elaborated performance, except...stretching. Still, it was pretty impressive how it could actually work in the Tower, there was one girl especially that became the face of the movement. Well, people could recognize her ass more easily than her face...
Advertisement
- In Serial10 Chapters
Starlio Stex:Year 2
Sequel to Starlio Stex Year 1, A character whose abilities are inspired by Iron Man, Once a kid growing up in poverty,Starlio faced against all odds by using his homemade inventions to rescue his friends from a human trafficking ring and following that,used the same inventions to save his school from the same human traffickers who shot up his school as revenge. The attention of such acts brought him the attention of many big players.Some who wish to be his allies or business partners while others,want his tech and genius for themselves. Now 7 months later,Starlio is now a millionaire. Determined to be different,Starlio uses his high tech armor to help out in the city,stopping crime that occur and saving lives when accidents happen. But with media coverage bringing him unwanted fame,his enemies all now know who he is and everybody wants a slice of his out of the world technology that has giving him the headlines for months.Sending waves after waves of assassins,master thieves and more to steal his technology,Starlio now finds himself facing more odds than ever before,including an ex military veteran Titus,pumped up on a superhuman drug and dawning an equally powerful armor against him...
8 113 - In Serial125 Chapters
Return of Chaos
For the longest time, it was thought that the citizens of Earth were the only denizens of the galaxy incapable of developing superhuman abilities — but recent events have flipped that assumption on its head. Between Austin Travis, Mote Emerson, Pierce Bradley, and their friends, Earth is now host to 12 Chaotics… as well as a myriad of mysteries surrounding them. From a new nemesis in the form of a clone, to connections to ancient technology from a long-lost civilization, to the ability to summon powerful legendary weapons, these 12 Chaotics have unknowingly become entangled in something larger than any of them have ever imagined. As if in response to these discoveries, the sinister machinations of galactic evil are churning. The metallic infection, a calamitous nanotechnology “disease” thought to have been vanquished 20 years ago, is slowly returning — and alongside it, a number of conflicts thought to be long past. While they only seek to better grasp their own abilities, Earth’s Chaotics will soon find themselves in the crossfire of returning threats and old heroes. These superpowered Earthians may not have chosen this path through life, but it will still be up to them to determine if history remembers them — to determine if history remembers the saga of the Keys. Return of Chaos is a direct sequel to Chosen Chaos, which begins the Key Saga novel series. Be sure to read Chosen Chaos first, to understand the plot and the characters thus far! Additionally, the Key Saga as a whole takes place 20 years after Rise. You will not need to read Rise to understand the events of Return of Chaos, however the latter will spoil many of the events that occurred in Rise, due to the simple chronology of taking place later in the timeline.
8 237 - In Serial24 Chapters
Demonify
Civilizations rise and fall. Battles are fought with the fate of the whole continent on the line. Each day is a battle for survival, a battle against creatures so vile they corrode the air itself. Swords clash, Magic is cast, powers clash, weapons break and there is blood. So much blood it paints the ground with the memory of desperation and death. Cities burn down to the ground, their ashes scattered in the wind.The creation of this world, this Virtual Reality took years of Research and commitment. The people of the modern age are bored, lazy. There is no thread to them so they create their own conflicts and finally create a world full of it.Conflict against beasts and Monsters, conflict amongst sentient races, battles and treasure… and unimaginable dangers.That is NeoPangea. A continent where beasts unseen by the modern world roam. Follow the players in this world as a cataclysmic event challenges everything they knew about the world and a never seen before crisis befalls the planet.EDIT: I'm currently in my exam phase and very busy studying. Therefore I'm putting this novel on hold for now! But despair not! I shall be back!
8 119 - In Serial33 Chapters
Candied Heart-Fatgum x reader
Y/n was someone the league of villains held hostage for a long time. No one noticed her disappearance since she was deemed quirkless. But the doctors were very mistaken. My hero academia and its characters belong to Kohei HorikoshiThe cover art does not belong to me, I am not sure who the artist is but they are amazing! Just to let my readers know! I am not on hiatus, I am just very slow to update. I love hearing feedback on my story, criticism is accepted. Please do not hesitate to point out mistakes! Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoy my story!
8 218 - In Serial9 Chapters
Out of my league
:0 testbulb real- Season two is finally over and now the contestants are free to do of whatever they please. Test tube has a weird feeling bubbling inside of her, she is confused. Whenever she comes near a certain someone, she gets a fluttery feeling in her gut, and chokes over her words. Boy I sure do wonder what that feeling is.
8 213 - In Serial35 Chapters
HYBRID
8 305

