AARYN

"I promise you, El, that the disformed want nothing more than to be judged on who they are as individuals, rather than this single lack in their lives. If the people only knew how valuable they were… They'd never call any of us incapable again."

That morning at the elders meeting wasn't the first time he'd heard the idea spouted that the disformed were incapable based on their inability to shift, and should therefore be protected from everyone. Including themselves. A truly incapable Anima—a child, or someone with some kind of mental or emotional deficiency that meant they didn't understand how their choices could affect them—was protected by the entire tribe. Provided for. And if they challenged an Alpha, or did anything else that brought their own life or safety in danger, they were not indulged.

The incapable were protected, even from themselves.

Aaryn shook off the darkness he felt at having been compared to that kind of weakness and looked at El. They had reached the mouth of the cave and she let go of his hand to walk ahead and open the door, but she was frowning, deep in thought.

"We need to meet and talk about this. For real. Not as mates, but as Ruler and Alpha. And anyone else that's important. I can't continue to walk into this blindly, Aaryn. Please. I need to know everything."

Aaryn sighed. "When we're done I'll go to the disformed and arrange a meeting. I'll ask some of them to come tell their stories and bring them to the table to help you understand what it is we need, and why we do what we do. The time has come to get this all out in the open, I think. I'll work on it. Just give me the day. Maybe some of tomorrow. I have some hard conversations ahead."

"I'm sorry to put more stress on you," she said as they walked into the cave. Aaryn headed straight for the couch where they'd always sat, and she followed, sitting close and under the arm he'd extended along its leather back. "How's your mom?" she asked quietly, putting a hand to his knee.

His stomach clenched—in desire at her touch, and in fear at the thoughts her question raised. "I'll be really honest, I'm not sure," he said. "I didn't sleep much last night because I was listening to her fall apart. But then when I got up this morning she was gone. She tells me she went for a walk. I panicked when I couldn't find her, but… she's fine. At least, she's safe. I thought it was good that she left the house. But now she's sleeping again and she's told me to leave her until dinner. She's not really eating, and barely drinking. She looks terrible and keeps sleeping. I don't know what to do."

"We need to talk to the wise-women," she said, squeezing his thigh. "I'm sorry we got distracted yesterday."

He shrugged. "I did too. I'm just… I hope they know something we don't. Because I find this whole thing baffling."

"Looks like we know what we have to do," Elreth said quietly, dropping her head against his shoulder with sigh.

"What's that?" he asked, stroking her upper arm.

"I need to go apologize to the elders. You need to talk to the disformed. Then we both need to go see the wise women and see what help we can get for your mom."

"You're right," he said. "But where in this plan is there time for us? El, every second I'm not with you, I'm aching for you. And every second I am with you, I'm desiring you. But I feel like we're getting whipped around in this storm and there's not even time to talk, let alone love on each other. Is this what royal life is like? Because I have to say, I'm not a fan."

"Not all the time," she said sadly. "But a lot of it, yeah. Dad used to always say you have to take your dreams between sleeping."

Aaryn snorted. "What does that even mean?"

"I guess he meant… don't wait for the right time to do whatever it is you want to do. Just do it."

"Just do it, huh?" Aaryn said, his voice graveled and heavy. He let his fingertips drag slowly down her arm again and felt her skin pebble under his touch.

"Yes," she said, and bit her lip, her fingers trailing up and down his thigh.

She sat at his side, her head tipped down, and eyes half-closed, feeling his touch. She was beautiful. With his free hand, he dragged her hair back from her face, back behind her shoulder. Then he laid his lips at the spot where her neck met her shoulder.

"This is a dream of mine," he whispered, his breath shuddering in his chest when she sighed a completely different kind of sigh.

Her eyes were closed and she hummed her pleasure at his kiss. "Tell me about this dream?" she murmured breathlessly.

Aaryn let a tiny growl putter in his throat and turned more toward her, gathering her closer. "It involves you and me here, alone, and that door barred," he muttered. Elreth laughed, and bit her lip when he kissed that spot under ear before continuing. "It involves taking off all our clothes and just… enjoying each other. No interruptions. No responsibilities. No more waiting," he sighed.

Elreth sucked in a deep breath. "I have that dream too," she said, her fingers sliding up his neck as he leaned over her and their eyes met. "Over and over again."

Aaryn nodded and kissed her deeply, letting his lips slide along hers softly, nibbling at her plump lower lip, and teasing her with his tongue.

A shiver rolled down his skin when she gripped his shoulders and dropped her head to lay her mouth at his collarbone. And she sucked.

He made the mating call in a soft groan that echoed around the cave and she responded, hers higher, more breathless.

"I don't know how I can wait," she whispered, tasting his neck. He dropped his head to the side to give her more room, and better access and she growled as she kissed her way up his neck.

"I don't know how I will either," he rasped between kisses. "But I know it's a good idea. At least for now. So… so maybe we just need to find something to do in the meantime to scratch the itch?" he said and pulled his head up to meet her gaze, knowing his eyes were hot and flashing. She'd barely touched him and his body was on alert, saluting his desire for her, his skin tingling with anticipation.

"That sounds… interesting," she said, smiling.

They kissed again, long and slow, but growing deeper. Aaryn had turned himself over her and was about to press her down onto the couch when she froze.

"What is it?" he asked quickly. "Did I hurt you?"

"No, I… I'm going to bar the door, just in case," she said with a nervous little giggle.

Aaryn groaned as she slid out from under him and walked toward the door.