“Jooohn!” was the noise I woke up to. It was a Saturday. I had intended to sleep in because being conscious is seldom worth it on the weekends. Apparently, Lona disagreed. Which was weird, because she always woke up after me. “John! Wake up! Look out the windows!”

I pulled myself up, rubbing my eyes. Through a yawn, I grabbed my glasses and put them on, blinking a few times. My eyesight is pretty bad and I probably would not be able to see anything without glasses. I got up and walked over the cold floor to the window and peered out.

“Oh, it snowed,” I said, displeasure apparent in my voice. Time had really flown since we started doing the experiments with Karen. In fact, we were up late last night trying to brainstorm other effects that ghosts may have on the environment.

“IT SNOWED!” Lona cheered, launching herself up into the air and doing a flip. “I love snow! It's so pretty and cool and is the perfect time to cuddle up to a special someone and steal all of their warmth. And sweaters are so cute!”

“You already steal all of my warmth,” I said, watching her do a little dance three feet off the ground. Of course, she loved winter. She liked everything. But it was adorable to watch her get excited about the little things. She sank back down the ground and concentrated. At her request, by which I mean staunch demand, we had been sleeping naked. She was insistent upon it because she knew I normally slept in the nude before she started living here and she had when she was alive too. She said it was the natural way of things between us, and she would not have it any other way. But fabric started to cover her body. It normally did not take her too long. She just thought of what she wanted to wear, which was normally jeans and a plain t-shirt and it automatically appeared. But this took a full minute for everything to appear. When she opened her eyes again, she spun around, looking at herself.

“What do you think?” She had manifested a sweater, jeans, and those boots that have a fur lining at the top. As well as a little beanie. Also, her sweater had one of those Christmas designs that offices use for contests.

“I think your sweater might have been made from the remains of Hallmark movie clips,” I said, trying, and failing, to suppress the smile spreading across my face.

“John! It's snowing! That means it's officially Christmas! Get into the holiday spirit!” She shouted.

“It's November. We haven't done Thanksgiving, yet.” I said quietly, turning my back to her. I went and got some clothes out of the dresser and got dressed in the normal way.

“Are you telling me you don't like Christmas?” Lona asked, floating behind me, watching me as I dressed.

“It's cold, expensive, and retail music gets somehow worse. What's there to like?” I asked, despondently.

“Oh my God! I'm dating a total Grinch! Grinch alert! We got a 'Bah Humbugger' up in here!” Lona said, pointing and calling out into the empty apartment. I just stared at her, one sock in my hand. “Come on! Who doesn't like Christmas?”

“Jehovah Witnesses, orphans, and me,” I said simply, as I finished dressing. I stood up and walked to the kitchen and started making coffee.

“Come on! Hot chocolate! The pretty lights! Christmas movies!” Lona said, clinging to my neck, whining. “All of those things are great!”

“Christmas movies suck, Christmas lights are fine, I guess, and I can have hot chocolate any time I want. That's the benefit of being an adult.” I countered, pouring too much sugar into the cup, mixing in a little milk, and then following up with coffee. Lona visibly deflated in front of me, falling to the ground. I watched her for a moment, sipping slowly. I finished my cup at the table, put it in the sink, and dragged her to the couch. She did not help at all. But she also is weightless, so I did not really need help. I got her up on the couch and she stared down at me, pouting.

“Ch-Christmas is my favorite time of year. How . . . Like, why don't you like it?” She asked, softly. I watched her for a moment and shook my head, sitting next to her.

“It doesn't matter.” I lied, then quickly changed the subject. “What do you normally do for Christmas? What can we do to make sure that you have a good time?”

“I want us both to have a good time. I c-can't have a good time if I know you're not!”

“I . . .” I hesitated. “I'll be happy knowing that we're doing something together.”

“R-really?” Lona asked, leaning over to me.

“Yeah. I'll enjoy you enjoying yourself. Now come on. Tell me.”

“Well, back in town, they set up these lights all down Main Street and it's really pretty and they have a little festival and we get to see a Nativity play and the Strombergs used to do a little Jewish one where they had the eight candles for Hanukkah!” Lona started speaking progressively faster and faster as she went on. “And Mrs. Jackson would always make little Christmas tree cookies and give them out and they were so delicious! And I'd watch movies with my family! Frosty and Rudolph and It's a Wonderful Life! And A Muppet Christmas Carol was, like totally, an instant classic!”

I watched her face and considered her words. There was nothing that I could do about the cookies. At least I don't think there is. But I had an idea for the other nonsense she mentioned. I was going to do what I could to avoid the shitty Christmas specials. I cannot stand them. I nodded to myself, having come to a decision. “Well, I can't guarantee it will be as good as your home town celebrations, but I think I've got a plan.”

“Oh? What is it?” Lona asked, putting her face right up into mine.

“It's a surprise,” I said simply, opening my laptop.

Lona whined and grabbed my shirt, jerking me around. “Telll meee!”

“Nah,” I said simply, ignoring the rocking back and forth. I opened to some nonsense anime that I liked to watch and settled in and watched it for a few hours.

“Like, is this the surprise? Some anime with a big titty girl?” Lona asked, gesturing to the screen.

“Nope. We have to wait a little while. Good things come to those who wait.” I responded, simply. I put an arm around her and pulled her into me. She nestled into my chest and watched the show with me. It was harem trash but it always calmed me down. Lona hated it. Not because it was a harem anime, but because the protagonist constantly cock blocked himself.

“What's the point if they never, like, y'know, do it?” She asked, after a few episodes of the Protag-kun consistently not getting anywhere with his girls.

“Well, I think it has something to do with the censorship laws in Japan,” I said, not looking at her.

“We have seen at least seven titties! You're telling me it never gets more in-depth than that?” Lona complained.

“Don't think so,” I said absently. She pushed into me a little more.

“You know, instead of watching cartoon titties . . . You could, like totally, play with some real, live ones.”

“Yours qualify as real, but not live.” I pointed out. She pouted at me.

“Meanie.” We watched a few more episodes, then I got up. She looked up at me and then outside, Enough time had passed so that it was getting dark. She jumped up and rushed after me. “Where are we going?”

“Going?” I asked, blankly. “Are we going somewhere?”

“Well, you're putting on your coat. And you said you had a plan. What was that plan again?”

“Oh, it was something. I'm sure of it.” I said, pulling the coat on. I started my car and started brushing it off when I was pegged with a snowball. I staggered a little and shook the snow out of my hair. “Lona! What the hell?”

She grinned at me and threw another one. “I'm going to keep pelting you until you tell me where we're going.”

I hid behind the car and gathered some snow of my own. I forgot to wear gloves and my hands froze over instantly, but that did not matter. I jumped up and threw the snowball back at her. It pelted her and she flew back a little bit. She looked aghast. “You can't just hit me with a snowball! I'm your girlfriend!”

“Looks like I just did, Snow Queen,” I said, gathering snow for another one. She dove for the ground and picked up some more, tossing them up as soon as she had barely balled them up. They almost always dissipated mid-air. I pelted her with another one, laughing. She was giggling herself. She was especially giggling when one of the snowballs flew through her. “Hey! That's cheating!”

“Is it? Well, as your Snow Queen, I deem that it's not!” She gathered a huge amount of snow and floated towards me. I started backing up.

“Lo-Lona! No! You can't! That's too much.” I said, slipping and falling on my ass.

“I think it's time the Snow Queen nominated a Snow King.” She said, before dumping all of the snow over me. It got everywhere. I spent the next few minutes digging snow out of my coat and pants and shirt. Lona looked thrilled. I shook myself out and got into the car, and did not wait for her, backing up immediately and driving away. I heard her yell after me, but I did not stop. I knew she could teleport into the car at any point. Whether or not she remembered that was another matter.

It took her five minutes to finally do it. “You left me behind, you jerk!”

“Eh, doesn't seem to have stopped you at all. Took you long enough to get here, though.” I said, driving. At this point it was dusk and the streetlights were starting to come on.

“I was waiting for you to come back!” She said, exasperated. “I did bring you a present, though.”

“Wha-” As I turned to ask her what she brought me, she poured a snowball down my back and I yelped, struggling to keep the car under control. “Jesus Christ, that's cold! What the hell! Are you trying to get us killed?”

“Well, I wouldn't be killed,” Lona said, grinning maniacally.

I paused at that and considered for a moment. “Fair enough.”

“So, like, where're we going?” Lona asked.

“Nope. Ain't telling you. In fact, now that you've punished me so much, I am going to make it worse on you. Close your eyes.” I responded, shifting in my seat as I feel a piece of melting snow slide into my ass crack.

“What! No way, I'm not doing that.” Lona said.

“Oh, I guess I can turn around then. No surprise for Lona.”

“What? No! I wanna go!”

“Eyes closed, then,” I said simply. She glared daggers at me for a moment, before closing her eyes.

“John?” She asked, a little sulkily.

“Mm?”

“C-can we hold hands? I . . . I don't like not seeing where I'm going.” I found her hand and entwined our fingers. She squeezed my hand tightly. It was another twenty minutes or so before I found a place to park. When I did, I felt her tense.

“Keep your eyes closed. We're not quite there, yet.” I said. She made an annoyed sound but obliged. I got out of the car and opened her side of the car, pulling her out of the car. I gripped her hand and led her away from the car. It took us a while to get there, but I had timed it pretty well. I pulled her in front of me and wrapped my arms around her. She sighed a little in relief and pressed into me. Which was about as cold as the snow right now. Fucking ghosts.

“Okay. Open your eyes.” She did and gasped. We were standing before a giant Christmas tree. There were other festive trimmings around, too. A Menorah, the Mishumaa Saba. There was even a Festivus Pole made of beer cans. We had arrived just in time for the lighting. The Festivus Pole lit up first. Then the Menorah and the Mishumaa Saba, which are both fancy, religious candelabras. They had alternating lights that would flicker different colors. Then finally, the Christmas tree lit up in stages. From bottom to top, with the star at the top glowing a bright gold last. Honestly, it was all breathtaking. Weirdly, I think my astigmatism actually makes the lights twinkle more, adding to the magic. But I have never seen them without an astigmatism, so it is hard to say.

Lona audibly gasped, clutching my arms tightly. She wrapped them more tightly around her and squealed with joy. “This is so beautiful!”

I think some people thought I must have looked odd, holding on to empty air, but for the life of me, I could not bring myself to care. After the lighting ceremony was done, I gripped her hand and we just circuited around, looking at all of the minor lights and little performances going on. There were street performers and carolers out. Lona stopped in front of each one and clapped, even though they could not hear her. It was cute to watch her react to everything. The joy she managed to bring to tiny things that I would not be able to enjoy without her.

There was a small fair going on, and we went around looking at the different stalls. Every time we passed a place with food, I would watch Lona start to go towards it, only to stop herself. She looked heartbroken every time she had to do it. So, I dragged her over to a game. It was a baseball throwing game, where the goal was to knock over some bottles. I would do anything to distract her at this point, because every time that look came across her face, I felt a pang of guilt. I ate in front of her all the time, and it must be hard. So much of dating is about food. Eating and sharing it, cooking it together, talking about your favorites. And she could not do that. I was a constant reminder of her not being alive. So, I spent ten games and nearly a hundred dollars until I won one of the big prizes for her. She watched me fail so many times. The first time, I almost beaned the attendant, but she managed to duck under it. I won a few times and got a small prize at first, but eventually, I got the hang of it and won the top prize. I went away with two small teddy bears and one gigantic plush Elsa doll. I felt it was fitting, given the Snow Queen comment. Lona whistled and clapped when I finally won but was disappointed when I wouldn't let her hold them.

“But they're mine! You won them for me, right?” She said, pointing her finger at me.

“Yeah, but what if someone realizes that there is a floating teddy bear?” I asked, tucking one of them into my jacket pocking.

“Who cares?” Lona asked, tugging on the other one. “It's mine and I want it!”

“It's yours but just wait until we get home!” I whispered. I took out my Bluetooth headset so that I could speak to her and not look crazy. Lona relented, opting to instead push herself into me and pet the bear when she thought I would not notice. There was a Ferris Wheel at the fair and I started heading towards it, thinking it would give us a nice vantage point to see the city, but my ghost froze, staring, eyes wide at the circling machine.

“Come on, Lona. Let's go.”

“Nuh-uh.” She responded, shaking her head.

“What? Why not?” I asked.

“I-I don't like heights!” She managed, her voice cracking.

“Y-you don't like heights?” I asked, flabbergasted. “You can literally fly.”

“B-but I don't do it that high! It's scary!” She said, her voice becoming a high pitched squeak.

I frowned. A ghost that's afraid of heights. That's a trip. I pulled her close. “Lona, it's not like you could get hurt. You're a ghost.”

“B-but . . . I don't like it.” She said, her voice now as quiet as a mouse's. I considered this for a moment before responding.

“I'll be right there with you. And on the ride, you can hold on to the teddy bears.” She considered it for a moment but did not look convinced. “And to me. I won't let go, okay?”

“O-okay.” She said, hesitantly. We made our way to the line and got on pretty quickly. It was cold out and a lot of people were already getting ready to go home. Lona grabbed both teddy bears and the Elsa plush and crushed them against her chest the instant we got into the basket. Her eyes were tightly closed and her lip was trembling. I sat next to her and pulled her against me. She pressed her face into my chest and wailed when the ride started to move.

It took us a while to get anywhere, but eventually, we got near the top. The city lights blinked brightly, battling the inky black sky around it, fighting a losing battle. Everything seemed so small from up here. The soft drone of cars. The laughter of patrons below us. I sighed in relief. “Lona.”

“Hmmm?” She managed, face still buried in my shoulder.

“Look at the city with me. Just for a moment.” I requested. She shook her head, and I patted her back. “O-okay. I just wanted to share this sight with you. It's really beautiful.”

After a moment, she managed to lift her chin a little bit. She did not look outside of the car for a moment. She stared at me. I chose to look around at the city, not wanting to make her more self-conscious about her fears than I already had. Slowly, her gaze drifted to the city around us. To the twinkling lights. The Christmas tree was visible from a few blocks away at this height. The different buildings with their piercing yellow lights. The cars moving off in the distance. She sighed and leaned into me. In that same tiny voice, she managed “F-from up here . . . Everything looks like a Christmas tree.”

I smiled and kissed her head. Her bravery only lasted until the Ferris Wheel started moving again and then she hid in my shirt again, yelping softly. I ran my hand over her shoulder, reassuring her that I was still there with her.

When we were walking back to the car, I let her hold her prizes, figuring there were fewer people around. We had to cross a bridge to get back and we passed a young man who was deathly thin and wearing a t-shirt and shorts in this weather. He was staring off into the distance. I did not think anything of it, but Lona stopped. “John.”

“Mm?” I asked, turning back to her.

“I . . . Isn't that a ghost?” She asked, gesturing to the man. I took a closer look. Sure enough, it was. He was ebbing and flowing in his transparency and the poor light and the snow made me miss it at first.

I walked over to him and called out. “Hey, man.”

He did not react at all. Lona joined me and called out. “Sir?”

There was still no response. I closed the distance a little further and grabbed him, turning him towards us. “A-are you alright?”

He was pale and his eyes were entirely unfocused. There were deep bags under his eyes. And his neck was at an odd angle, obviously broken from a fall. Even as he stood there, not reacting, he got more translucent. I had seen it before. A few times. He was Fading. I did not know how long he had been like this, but he was probably a relatively young ghost. A few weeks or months. Less than a year. I glanced down over the bridge railing. There was a frozen stream beneath it, but there were several protruding rocks. He was a jumper. I think I have mentioned before that some things eat away at ghosts more fiercely than other things. Depression is a disease that consumes everything you are until there is barely anything left. Ghosts of suicide victims tend to fade quickly because usually by the time that you actually go through with suicide, there is not much of you left.

I felt my throat tighten and my eyes tear up. I felt Lona next to me. She took my hand into hers and squeezed. She knew that I thought about suicide sometimes. She did not know how much. She also did not know that one of the reasons I did not want to go through with it is because if I did become a ghost, there would be so little left. Like what I was staring at in front of me. The man's eyes had not focused yet and he slowly shifted back to his spot in front of the railing. I stood there staring. Lona was silent next to me, trying her best to be a comforting presence. But she was shaking. She knew what was happening. The man leaned against the railing and peered down into the dark, icy water below. After another moment he heaved himself over the ledge and fell down. I pushed myself over to the rail and watched his descent. Just before he hit the rocks below his presence dissipated into a thousand, a million, a billion specks of light and then Faded off into the night. He was gone. Lona and I both stared down at the water for another couple of moments.