The Imperial Court was absolutely scandalized by Emperor Shu’s pick for Consort. Despite years of bugging him to at least accept a concubine, they were now throwing a fit about someone from lower nobility entering the Imperial Lineage.

Honestly, these troublemakers! Make up your mind! Do you want the Emperor to have someone or don’t you? And stop acting like my family is straight commoner just because my Mother’s side was all merchants. They were at least SUCCESSFUL merchants.

Quite a few official started harboring rebellious thoughts in their hearts at the news. Emperor Shu had already broken a lot of traditions and long standing ways of doing things as it was, this was just too much! The fact that most of them had eligible daughters they’d hoped would catch his attention, they swore had nothing to do with their objections!

I had mentioned this before, but Jing had studied the Blue Flower Mountain Sect’s teachings and improved upon them. He was still improving upon them to this day. While he was not the most powerful person on the continent, he was at least one of the top five. Certainly within his own country, there was no one even close.

Therefore, no one could tell him what to do. Not the Imperial Family, not the Retired Emperor, not his Uncles, and not a bunch of weak government officials in Court. It’s just that he didn’t believe in bullying the weak or showing off, so many had forgotten his true power. That day, he decided to remind them.

He patiently listened to every single one of their complaints and objections. Once they were done, he released his killing intent without warning. The cries and sounds of bodies falling could be heard in the Court. Several officials wet their pants. After a full minute of this, he retracted it again.

Sitting on his throne looking down at them, eyes narrowed, he asked: “Are there any further objections?”

No one dared to say a word against the marriage after that. The Emperor kindly released Court early, allowing everyone to change their pants. Despite the humiliation, they counted themselves lucky they’d left alive. Anyone with that level of martial arts could kill weak people such as themselves instantly.

The ones who’d not objected to his marriage had remained standing and in good health, though they weren’t many. Some were very old, having worked closely with the previous Emperor and having a clear understanding of the true strength of Emperor Shu. Others were young and new, having been given positions by Emperor Shu directly, so they sided with him regardless of whether they thought it was wise.

They all took the opportunity to congratulate the Emperor and get further into his good graces. They knew they’d get front row seating to the wedding because they’d kept their mouths’ shut and he’d be more likely to listen to them in the future too.

The Imperial Family had been politely informed of the impending wedding that day too. The Retired Emperor did not object because he knew Shu Fu Jing was powerful enough to marry whoever he wanted. The Princes had kept their vow of not getting on Emperor Shu’s bad side.

And everyone else… the message he’d sent them had been quite clear: any negative feedback would be considered traitorous. Everyone, down to the concubines, sent Emperor Shu congratulations as fast as they could, as if their very lives depended on it.

Except, of course, the disgraced Crown Prince’s family. They said nothing at all.

The following day the whole nation was informed. Emperor Shu used the Wedding Proclamation as a chance to informed the citizens of the kind of Empress they were getting.

Well, in short, it was a love letter disguised as a Imperial Proclamation.

He really never struck me as the poetic type, so imagine my surprise when it was repeated back to me. Again. And again. Sighs. My girl friends all came calling immediately after hearing the Proclamation and told me all about it, in extreme detail and then demanded I give up my own details.

I stuck with my silly lie of meeting the Emperor at twelve while sneaking out of the house. Unlike my parents, my girl friends were absolutely enthralled by the story. They told everyone and anyone who’d listen about our romantic encounter, claiming it was a destined meeting.

One of my closer girl friends, I told the truth. Well, partially. Mostly I was teasing her before telling her the lie. Her reaction was quite interesting though. She could not imagine the Emperor as a filthy street orphan. She, too, knew the Emperor had been an orphan for a time, but being homeless and eating garbage.. That she’d not known. She bluntly informed me that I’d found jade in a pigpen and not to try my luck twice.

I always did like her. She never beat around the bush and was very forthright and gullible. I often slipped in real truths about my life as a spirit, because she’d believe them for a time before telling me not to tease her. Outside of Jing, she was the only person I’d opened up at all to after becoming human.

As for the rest of the nation, they’d never even heard of the Ya Family. Since they had no knowledge of the family, good or bad, they took the Emperor at his word. The more wealthy and powerful people immediately began investigating the fortunate Ya’s to see where they could take advantage.

The invitation list was huge. My girl friends and their families got invited, of course. There was my parents, grandparents, extended family… And then there were a lot of people I’d never met before. I believe they were business associates of my Father. Fortunately, the Bride doesn’t have to meet every guest, otherwise I think I’d have collapsed from exhaustion.

As for the Groom’s list… he’s an Emperor, how big do you think it was? I didn’t envy him. The Groom has to actually be social with the guests he invites, it’s part of the wedding tradition. They have some excuse about guests giving good fortune for the practice, but it was really started so the men could gain new connections and strengthen old ones. Very political, very practical, and not the slightest bit romantic.

I’m told the wedding was very grand. Once again, with a great deal of bitterness, I wouldn’t know. I didn’t get to see it. I had a red silk, golden embroidered veil on my head the moment I left my house. I felt like humanity was punishing me for all those years of peeping, by not allowing me to peep at my own wedding.

My fairy children attended too, obviously. Only the human children and Jing could see them, which lead to some minor mischief. The human children thought it was grand and were glad for the distraction during such a stuffy occasion. They fairies sang, they danced, they threw flower petals (to the confusion of everyone who couldn’t see them), and they all congratulated me.

I heard later that people who attended swore up and down that the gods themselves had come down and attended our wedding. There were so many good fortunes and strange, beautiful things happening around them they could only explain as divine. I can’t say I minded the misunderstanding, it helped alleviate the skepticism people had over our marriage.

Apparently Jing was lectured over breakfast by several fairies about not letting me down. I wish I could have seen it. If he made me cry, they let him know how they’d surely enact the worst kind of revenges. I don’t know how he got through breakfast being threatened like that, surrounded by bustling and frantic servants, but I guess years of dealing with them had given him a pretty thick skin.

It was a very long day, and by the time we were holding the red rope and saying our vows, I was relieved it was almost over. I’d been to weddings before, but Imperial Weddings were no joke. They added a lot of extra steps to the whole process. So troublesome! Just take me to the bedroom already!

Ahem.

I got to the Bridal Chamber and sat on the bed, glad to be off my feet. Jing came later after having accepting the wedding toasts. He was slightly drunk, despite his best efforts, because of all the alcohol he’d been forced into drinking. He could have cleared it out of his system, but he wasn’t really given the time to do it.

His hands trembled, just like with the potted tree, when he took off that red silk veil. He looked into my eyes, a mixture of affection and intense longing. Two hot calloused hands touched my face before reaching up and helping me take off my heavy gold head-dress.

My hair finally tumbled down my back, like a black stream on the bed. He caressed my hair for several minutes, apparently enjoying the texture. He then helped me undress, touching any skin that got exposed as he did, and I did the same.

When he we were both naked, he let out a low groan, despite not having actually done anything yet. When I titled my head and raised my brow in confusion, he finally explained, “Why are you so beautiful?”

“Aren’t I just average?”

“Where?!”

I shrugged. “I’m just being objective.”

“Well, stop it! Stop thinking and start feeling.” His hands reached out, gently caressing my body, his voice husky and low. “Feel me, Xui. Feel me and only me.”

And so I did. Over and over, until we were both exhausted.

After we were finished, I turned to him with a smirk on my face. “Aren’t you glad I got a body?”

“…to bring that up now of all times…”

“But aren’t you glad? Wasn’t I right?”

He sighed, realizing I just wanted to gloat. “Yes, yes, you were right.”

When I giggled at his admission, he pulled me into his arm, resting my head on his inner shoulder. He then stroked my hair without saying anything. This guy, he really had a thing for hair, didn’t he?

After a while, I asked, “Jing, why do you love me?”

His hand on my hair stopped. “Do you not know?”

“Well, you’ve never said so how could I know?”

“What about the Wedding Proclamation?”

“Bah! Tell me with your own mouth, without all the poetic nonsense.”

He sighed again, patting my head this time. “How you have lived so long and managed not to appreciate the art of words…”

“I’m a mountain, not a muse, what exactly are you expecting?”

There was a pause and then he chuckled. “I hadn’t thought of it that way, but you are technically a mountain…”

“Yes I am. How does it feel, dear Emperor, marrying a mountain?”

“Surprisingly soft.”

“Only for you.”

His arms tightened around me, apparently touched by my words even if they were jesting.

“When I first saw you,” He began slowly, “I’m fairly sure I was dying. You said once that people on the verge of death are most open to seeing spirits…”

“Eh? I don’t recall you being at death’s door when we met.”

Jing took my hand and placed it on my chest, I could feel his heartbeat.

“I was dying on the inside. Despite my best efforts, nothing I did succeeded. I thought I was being punished for escaping death. I tried to live honorable to make up for it, but was punished at every turn for it. I was on the verge of giving up. Right before meeting you, I’d begged whatever deity was watching to help me. Just… give me a sign… something… some reason to keep living, to not give up. And then I looked up, and there you were.”

He continued, “I’d never seen anything like you before. You were sitting on a box in the alley looking directly at me. There was a kind of sad, wistful look in your eyes, I remember. Even though you were shaped like a human girl, it was clear you weren’t human. You were dressed in the finest lady’s dress, but sitting on a box in an alley. No lady would be there, doing that.”

“Ah, I remember that day very clearly too. You came right up to me and told me I was as pretty as a flower.”

His chest rumbled as he chuckled. “You always liked those sorts of compliments as a spirit.”

“Things that are true are the best compliments.”

“I suppose you’re right. Well, here’s another truth: you were beautiful, not just pretty. I actually thought that I’d lost my mind and was hallucinating a goddess at first. I know you tried very hard to imitate the physical world, but your feet never quite touched the ground. And your clothes always moved as if there was a breeze. Sometimes, if you weren’t concentrating, you’d glow a little too, like a blue lantern.”

“Ah! Why didn’t you tell me?! Here I’d thought I’d gotten it down to perfection!” And I really did think that. I spent so many years refining my appearance, trying to imitate the corporeal, the human. It was my pride to think I did it well.

“I liked how you looked though, so why would I tell you?” He teased, poking me in the nose. “Such a beautiful goddess, but you were so happy to talk to me. There was no pity or superiority in your gaze, just the joy of finding a friend. You were lonely, and I was your friend. Because I existed, because I had kept strong and hadn’t died, I’d become friends with a goddess. I was glad to be alive.”

“What goddess? You keep saying that, but I’m not a goddess!” I smacked him lightly on the chest.

“Yes, yes, but I didn’t realize that until later.” He said, grabbing my hand and kissing it. “And anyways, my point is you gave me a reason to live. And I’m so glad you did.”

“Hm… and that’s why you love me?”

“Is that not enough?” Seeing I was slightly discontented, he gave a low laugh. “You are also a very charming person. Clever, strong, wise, mischievous, and carefree… you see the world different than me, than anyone I suspect. I really admire that part of you, did you know? I stopped caring about other people’s opinions and started living as I wanted, chasing after my goals and living by my own standards. I’ve never been as good at it as you, but I like to think my efforts brought me some measure of success.”

“How modest. You went from orphan to Emperor, I think you can say at this point you’re quite successful.”

“Not at all. Until I married you, it really was only “some”.”

His words actually stunned me into silence for a moment.

“You… how do you say that with a straight face?”

“It’s easy when it’s true.”

I sighed, having my own mentality thrown back in my face.

“Do you… do you love only the spirit part of me?” My timid uncertainty surprised even me. I must have integrated well into this body, if I was jealous of myself from the past. I wanted, needed, him to love the me now and not the me that was ethereal and untouchable.

When he didn’t answer, I glanced up and saw genuine confusion on his face.

“S,sorry. That was a strange question wasn’t it?”

“Yes it was. Exactly what do you think we’ve been doing for hours? Do you really think I’d indulge myself like this with just anyone?”

“Ah…” I leaned my face into his chest, trying to cover my face, embarrassed. “I guess I’m just jealous of myself.”

“You silly…” He began and then stopped. “Xuiying and Xuilan are the same. You are both Xui to me, beautiful as a goddess. But you were right. Humans are physical beings and need physical touch. Now that I’ve felt you, I could not.. I could not live without it. I was sorry before but now I’m glad. I’m glad that you sacrificed yourself for me. I know it’s selfish, but your physical touch, I never want to live without it. Xui, thank you. I will never take this body of yours for granted.”

“…you’re such a smooth talker…” I muttered jokingly, while feeling my heart soar. This feeling of love, of being desired, I too was glad that I had sacrificed. Xuiying could never feel this, never understand it, but Xuilan could. And now Xui would forever remember it. I had no regrets for my decision, not then and not now.

To be in the arms of my beloved, life was good.

Time passed.

Being an Empress is hard work. To make it more interesting, I threw a lot of parties. I’d gotten good at them as a Ya, but as a Shu I became an expert. I’m pretty sure Jing vomited blood a few times at their hefty price tags, but he never told me no and just complained bitterly at the expense instead. I knew he was spoiling me, and I took full advantage of the fact.

Now that I had a lot of status, not only could I make my parties more fun, I also had greater influence on who did or didn’t make it socially. I helped a lot of artists become famous, who would have lived in obscurity. My match-making abilities became legendary. Not a single couple I brought together ended up unhappy, even if they were hostile to each other at first.

I was also known for my benevolence and compassion. My fairies had no intention of being bound to the palace, and would often explore all over the country. They’d come back with all kinds of interesting bits of information. If they told me a particularly sad tale, and it wasn’t too late by the time it reached me, I would directly intervene to solve the problem.

But there was one thing I could not do.

I could not give birth to children.

It’s not that I didn’t get pregnant. I did. Jing was constantly chasing after me so it was impossible not to. But I miscarried every single time. I suppose it’s a small favor that the miscarriages happened early on, so that I couldn’t see any physical evidence beyond blood and lumps.

Why did my pregnancies always end in failure? I could not understand it at first. It should be a simple matter of two bloodlines coming together. As long as my body was healthy, that should be enough.

I began to study the children inside of me while they were growing, before they died. With a few exceptions, they were perfectly healthy. Right up until they died.

Something was missing. I did not want to admit it, but I think it was because I wasn’t natural. That is, a foreign non-human spirit was indwelling a human body. It was causing a disruption somewhere in the pregnancy.

Why? Why? Why?

Why can’t I give birth? Why do my children die? I don’t know! So many of my babies have died because I can not find the answer!

I knew what people were saying: What good is an Empress who can’t have children? The primary purpose of an Empress was to give birth to an Heir. Everything else was secondary. No matter what else I did, my lack of childbirth was becoming a spot of contention within the country.

The Court Officials started to bring it up on a regular basis. They were very careful how they talked about it, knowing that their Emperor loved his Empress. Even if he took just one Concubine, that would be fine. She could be anyone, they didn’t care. Just as long as she could get pregnant and give birth to a child. Son or daughter, that didn’t matter either at this point.

After ten years, I started to agree with them. I didn’t want Jing to die without having a child. You see, when he died, he’d go some where I couldn’t follow. That meant the only thing left for me would be his bloodline, a bit of him left on earth. In his decedents, I would catch a glimpse of him.

When I suggested to him that getting a Concubine, at least one, might be a good idea, he got so upset he refused to sleep with me for a week and barely spoke two words either. I did not expect him to respond that way. I had only barely suggested the idea, to at least consider it.

He let out his anger on the Imperial Court. As far as he was concerned, they were the reason I was speaking such nonsense. If they’d kept their mouth’s shut, I’d never have been forced into thinking it was a viable alternative.

In a rage, he yelled at them: “Look at me. Do I look even a day over 25? You’re all turning into middle aged men, but I’m still young. And I’m stronger now than when I was first coroneted. I’m worth three sons, much less one! When you’re old and on your deathbed, I will be here! When you grandson’s take over your position, I will still be here! If you dare bring up this matter of children again, I’ll have your heads and your family’s heads too. Do I make myself clear?”

Jing rarely lost his temper, but when he did, it was no joke. I think the last time he’d been that angry was when the Court objected to marrying me. They and I should have known, he wouldn’t take anyone else. It was me or nothing.

And his point was true: he still looked young. His Martial Arts had only improved over time, making him stronger. He was now one of the top three most powerful people on the continent. No one dared attack the Empire, outside of rogue bandits with a death wish. The area had never been so politically and economically stable than since he became Emperor.

Speaking honestly, it was unnatural for Jing to be a mystical art user and an Emperor. What I mean is, generally, the mystic arts required a lot of time and energy, with people commonly cultivating through meditation for a straight year. They also craved challenges, seeking out other martial artists to fight and test their skills. Earthly concerns like money and political power were actually unappealing to them.

Yet Jing “lowered” himself to be an Emperor. He was content to never be ranked among the Sects or be renowned in circles of power. He devoted all his time to cleaning up his country and making sure it smoothly functioned.

And to me. He devoted an enormous amount of time to me. If he wasn’t doing Imperial work, he found me. Sometimes his love was actually a bit smothering, but I’d never say that out loud. If I did, he’d be heartbroken over it and mope like a kicked dog.

As for me, I aged very slowly too. Are you surprised? My spiritual powers may have been cut in half to revive this body and stick myself in it, but I was still quite powerful. I was more powerful than any martial artist alive, so naturally my aging was quite slow. If I wanted, I could seem eternally young. But I didn’t want to outlive Jing, so I purposefully sped up my aging process.