Madoka

The long trek to Madoka’s house/fort was gruesome. It was hot, humid, and she had a bullet lodged in her knee, bleeding a bit every step of the way. Not fun times at all, but you know what? It was worth it, as long as she could catch that dastardly El Guante.

And besides, she had Former Sheriff Flint for small talk.

(Madoka sniffled a little as she thought this, because Former Sheriff Flint was not the most fun person to converse with, honestly. He was kind of boring.)

“So, umm... “ Madoka tried to think of an easy conversation topic. “Have you seen any movies lately?”

“No, I’ve been dead.”

“Oh. Uhh… What’s the last movie you saw, then?”

“Battleship. It was really bad.”

“Oh. Uhh… Have you ever heard of the musician Michael Guy Bowman? He’s really good.”

“Of course. Everyone’s heard of Michael Guy Bowman. I couldn’t think of anyone I’d like to hear more, except that I haven’t heard any music in five years because I’ve been dead.” (The Madoka Series is set in an alternate universe where Michael Guy Bowman is really popular… sadly this does not reflect reality :’( )

“Oh.” Madoka was quickly running out of conversation topics. She felt a sharp pain run up her leg and winced. “What’s the most pain you’ve ever been in?”

“When I died.”

She shouldn’t have expected differently. “Uh, besides that?”

“When my family--”

“NO! I mean, uh, physical pain. Like, have you ever crashed a bike or something? Yeah, I’ve done that before.”

“I never had a bike.”

Madoka frowned a very big frown.

“You know,” Flint began. “You mentioned you married that Kyouko Sakura girl. How is that?”

“It’s fun. Being married is cool and stuff. She’s really funny and beautiful and makes weird pop culture references sometimes. And she’s a good cook! I love her a lot.”

“Sounds like a good marriage to me. Though, I prefer traditional marriage myself…”

Madoka stopped dead in her tracks. “What?”

Former Sheriff Flint raised his hands in the air. “It was a joke! Can’t ghosts make jokes?”

Madoka frowned further. “No! That’s not a funny joke, anyway…”

“I’m sorry… Well, if it’s any consolation, at least that joke will seem very outdated to our readers in ten years.”

“Like we’ll have any readers in ten years.”

“Good point.”

The fort was now within their line of sight. It was still far away, but they could finally make it… Madoka was going to catch El Guante once and for all!