Chapter 177

Regret

The ball is over .

I go back to the mansion while being shaken in the carriage .

Next to me, Bern was looking outside through the window .

"Sister, how are you feeling?"

Suddenly, he asked me when he noticed my sight .

" . . . I got a bit dizzy again now that we're in the carriage, but I'm more or less okay . When we get back to the mansion I will take some rest and I'll be up and wonderful again shortly . "

"That would be the best"

I divert my line of sight, as if escaping from Bern's caring look and words .

Silence covered the carriage one more time . The sound of the horse galloping comes into the ear .

" . . . Hey, Bern"

It was me who broke the silence .

"Why did you fall in love with Yuri?"

To my question, Bern blinked his eyes as if surprised .

" . . . I was . . . feeling like I was in a dream . . . She made everything so sweet and nice . . . She went in by the scars I had . . and made me feel like with her I would not need any other thing . . all would be perfect . . . "

However, I had a bitter smile when I heard that .

" A dream . . . "

"Yes, I was caught by the sweetness of the unreal, and afterwards I drowned when I knew it was all a lie . . "

"so……"

A dream, is not it? . . . . . . It may be strange for someone "perfect" as her to exist .

"Is a dream made to someday wake up?"

"At that time I thought that I had to wake up . . . "

I wonder if the time will come when Dan wants to wake up too . . . It is unknown . . .

But I can only wish for that time to come .

While I thought about such a thing, I arrived at the mansion unnoticed .

I lie in my bed as soon as I return to the room .

I clung to the sheeting with tightness so as to suppress the tremor of my body .

It is pure anger that occupies my heart .

. . . . I was helpless . . . . again . . .

Yuri was working without stop while I was in the territory .

Tending nets as a spider . . and poisoning anyone she caught to live a dream . . . .

Now there is no one despising her as a baroness and they even let her pose as royalty .

She fascinated everyone and built her own side .

The result is this . . . . . . . I lost my precious friend to the same suffering I went through .

Speaking of what I could do to help her avoid this, I only appealed to my friend honestly and that did not work .

I regret it . It was a miserable intent .

I raise my fist in anger and pound on the pillow .

Boom, boom, the sound can be heard .

I repeat it many times . As I seek for a way to calm down my anger .

I regret it . It was painful .

While lying down, I was at the mercy of those intense emotions and I could not feel sleepy at all .

. . . . . . No matter how bad it is, the sun rises and the night ends .

I ended up still pounding on the pillow at the morning as I could not sleep after all .

While exhaling, I change clothes .

I had breakfast, headed to the office quickly and began to work .

There are various things to do, like urgent requirements, reports, authorizations accompanying them, etc .

Especially during my stay in the Kingdom, I have limited time to work on this because I have to do social work . Build relationships and the likes .

Even so, because of the lack of sleep my head doesn't work .

……no . I guess the feelings of what happened yesterday is dragging me behind .

" . . . Excuse me . "

Tanya entered the room with a knocking sound .

"Tanya . . . I have something I want to ask you . . . "

I was struggling a while . . . . . . . Whether or not to let Tanya investigate the matter of Mimosa .

My father advised me that I should not touch the matter of Yuri too much, and Mimosa herself does not want it .

However, I'll regret again if I do not know .

It is enough for me to regret when something like yesterday happens .

I hate being powerless .

Knowing that, then I think about it again .

. . . Yes, I will ask her . . . I conclude .

This is my ego . For my ego, I involved Tanya .

Even though danger may reach Tanya while investigating Yuri .

Tanya may also explain the risks, before I have a firm decision .

But she smiled at my wish and just told me that she was "available" .