Ceiling. A dry, paint-peeled, crack-formed, web-meshed ceiling. Ugly ceiling too.

If I was alive, if I wasn't staring at the ceiling tiles of purgatory, then I think I just woke up maybe... breathing, maybe. I don't remember going to sleep.

It's cold too. I wasn't just shivering, I was an earthquake popsicle from how frost-biting everything suddenly felt. I went into the mummy-position. Forearms wrapped close, and wrapped tight. The hairs on my skin felt like frozen prickles and barbs, brushing against them felt so coarse and bumpy.

I'm... brushing against my bare skin? Wait a second... I don't remember taking my shirt off. I don't remember...

I remember…

What do I remember?

Not this ceiling, most definitely. Exposing my chest? Nah I ain't too confident about my stature strutting around like a bulging beachwear model. It wasn't me that did it. Fuck, my head... I don't drink, booze too bitter, I knew what a hangover is, I don't know what it does.

Is this what it does? If so, then there goes every possibility of me ever becoming a drunken slurring alcoholic. I mean when coffee is brimming aplenty, who the hell needs beer?

Speaking of which, I'm parched. My insides felt like the Sahara relocated itself into my throat. Could someone please get me a -?

"Here, drink this."

Oh, thank you.

Wait who did I just thank you'd?

"Amanda!"

Nothing could have prepared for the absolute atrocity that was the sound of me. I thought a dying whale had somehow beached up beside me till I realize, no - that was just me… my voice.

The shock nearly toppled the cup of water that was shoved into my hands. Thankfully the mug was plastic, and thankfully my grip was firm.

But nothing at all, not even that, could beat the violent sudden whiplash of remembering. I know hungover folks would take this kind of pill to help relieve the effects… I wasn't sure what pill it was, but I was sure if that pill was a person, then Amanda was that person - boasting herself with a 100% effectiveness that 10/10 hangover men would recommend.

"Drink," Amanda insisted, raising the mug in my hands up to my lips. "You want to feel better, you ought to."

I decided it best to listen, so I took a sip, and yeah, the hangover pill doesn't lie alright. Head stopped pounding, body stopped shivering. Water, the elixir of life, again - who needs beer?

"Do you remember anything?" She inquired, just as I drew the mug away. "They say you'd be fuzzy, they also say you might not be - I don't know, they say a lot of things."

I spoke again, less dying whale this, more sandpaper against craggy rocks. "Who's they?"

"Irene, Ash - who else could 'they' be?"

The mug nearly toppled over again. I remember now, I remember everything now.

"The summoning!" I was scrambling to my feet. "What happened after? Where are -?"

"No, you sit!" Amanda pulled me back down, her grip was like gorilla-arms, either that or I became ten times weaker. I think it was a mixture of both really. "See, if you don't rest up, it's my head on the block. I'm not keen on upsetting your both your knight and your girlfriend at the same time, capiche?"

I landed with a hard thud, and it was like I ruptured every organ in that fall. I didn't even realize I was aching this badly. Think I understood now… no shirt, small private room, cup of water in my hand.

"You're my nurse, then?" I asked, still wincing from the pain throbbing all over.

Don't think she appreciated how those words left my lips the way they did. Amanda had a frown on, and her arms crossed. "Not what you were expecting, was it?"

"Where are they?"

She nudged her eyes upwards. "Sixth floor. They're dealing with it, don't worry about it."

I can kinda take a guess just what 'it' could be.

"So why wasn't I dealing with it too?"

Amanda snorted. "You fainted, dummy."

"Where's my shirt by the way?"

"You're sleeping on it, dummy."

That explains how surprisingly smooth the ground was.

"You're lucky it wasn't any more than that too," She continued further. "From how it looked, you shouldn't even be breathing let alone waking up and talking. Ash had to do that magic-transfusion thing last minute."

"Guess it worked."

"Yeah, but it took a lot out of her, too. You should have seen her… she's like a dead woman walking. I'm surprised she's still conscious after all that."

It wasn't a nice image to be lingering on. I see Ash in my head, and the things I put her through. Subjugating her, ordering her, using her… y'know, I thought I was different. That I was going to be a different master to her from all the rest.

What part of this was any different?

Goddamn it, me.

"Irene?" I said, trying to stop myself from thinking any further. "How is she?"

"Pissed."

An immediate response. That's not good.

"But you're alive, so… to her, no harm no foul."

That's… a little better, I think?

I took my crumpled shirt from the floor, giving myself a little quiet moment to take it all in while I placed it back on.

In the meantime, I let my eyes wander a bit - the room I was in didn't really look all too familiar, there was an open window that was filtering in that chilling breeze I was feeling… dusty wooden tables and chairs all around meant that I had to be in somewhere around the third floor.

They sent me quite the ways away, didn't they? Guess they really wanted me as far away from things as possible. After all, I already did what I had to, didn't I?

I did it. Against every odds imaginable. I persevered.

I scaled that slippery mountain of impossibility, and here I was resting atop the summit… overlooking the view from all the way up high. I should be proud of myself, shouldn't I?

Pat myself on the back, job well done - you actually did it. So why does it still feel like I haven't?

Seriously by all accounts, I should be beaming proud and wide, shedding tears of joy at the breathtaking view I earn for myself here up at this peak, but that just wasn't the case.

The view was still very, very black… it was still very, very gooey. Why did Blight still stare at me from out the window? Why was it still all there?

My shirt was icky… caked in so much dirt and grime. It's been through a lot this past couple of days, and it's about to go through just a bit more.

I scrambled up to my feet, this time making sure to step away from Amanda's arm darting for me like a snake in the grass - and she was a fast one alright, just not fast enough.

"No, no, no!" Her every exasperated 'no' was kept in sync with the beat of her thundered footsteps as she scurried along after me out of the hospital room. "You're supposed to rest, you're not supposed to be moving!"

"And the Blight's supposed to be gone," I replied, making sure to keep our distance far. "Why isn't it gone?"

Amanda had bemusement in her eyes. "It's Sera! You know, Sera! It's gonna take quite a bit of persuasion to get her to cooperate."

"So why isn't she persuaded yet?"

"Because it's Sera!" She was picking up the pace. "Look, they're working on it, just leave it to them! If you continue to keep exerting yourself like this - "

"I'll rest when it's over."

"It is over!" Amanda caught up, a firm grip clinging onto my shoulder. "Sera listens to Ash. That's true in Asteria, and it'll be true here too. Have some faith in her. You don't have to be the hero all the time."

One foot on the stairwell… that's how far I manage to reach. I could keep going, swipe her hand away, I doubt Amanda was the type to get violent with someone so weak.

On the other hand, I could go along with her grip, relent myself to her care, and just accept I don't have to be there to make sure things get done accordingly. As she said, I don't have to be the hero all the time.

Guess I was just wanted it to be all over already. As fast as possible, as soon as possible. This entire situation has been the only thing on my mind this whole time, and I just didn't want to think about it anymore.

Okay, alright… I'll be patient. I'll wait a bit longer then, I'll think a bit longer then.

"You did your part in this, already," Amanda said softly, pulling gently at my shoulder. "Let them do theirs."

I let her pull me, I let her walk me… I allowed my hand to loosen from the stair handle… and together, we slowly made our way back.

"Just wait and see," She said, offering me a warm reassuring smile. "You'll see."