It was something as easy to drag out a weak and sickly person like me, like catching a dying rabbit. They didn't have to waste much sweat doing it.

Sunyeon followed behind the two big men, looking at me scornfully as if he was pouring out all the pain and anger through his eyes.

While I occasionally glanced at Sunyeon, who still didn't show any friendliness at all, inside I really wanted to ask him to stop doing this to me, but I couldn't say anything.

Here, I didn't have the strength to speak. Even if I could, no one would listen to me and the words would just be hogwash. It was a waste.

I stared at the coffin, further and further away from my sight. I had not finished praying for him yet, but once again we were separated most cruelly. In fact, I just wanted to accompany Donghwa's body here before he was cremated, but other people didn't agree.

They just didn't know how I was dying and want to make one last wish but no one wanted to make it happen. It felt like your whole life was just a waste of time.

While outside the building, the big men who were dragging me out immediately threw me on the ground. I fell hard, causing my palms to be scratched.

I feel pathetic but can't do anything ....

If there was the saddest thing in this world, it was my situation right now.

Sitting on the ground, I felt dazed by my situation. I lifted my head, saw Sunyeon in front of me. I still didn't understand why he hated me so much and did this to me. I asked subconsciously, "Wh ... why are you doing this?"

After regaining my senses, I started to stand up with difficulty. I didn't care about my dirty clothes and just kept staring at Sunyeon who was standing in front of me.

"You are the jinx of this world!" Sunyeon yelled, crying profusely. "It's all because of you! Brother Lee died, it's because of you! Why did a jinx like you have to be born in this world?! Get away from here!"

While saying the insults, Sunyeon pointed at my nose with anger and sadness in his eyes. His lips trembled violently and tears streamed down his face, but he held back his sobs with difficulty on his tongue.

Hearing those painful words, I froze for a moment. My body went numb in shock like a blood clot had blocked my veins and heart so that no warmth could make me think more clearly.

I also thought like that, why did I have to be born in this world?

However, I didn't want anyone to say that to me. If only I had known for certain that something like this would happen in the future, I would also have chosen not to be born at all. It would be a better way than having to suffer many sufferings and it would be better not to fall in love.

If only that option existed, I'd rather replace Donghwa to lay down in that place!

I wanted to defend myself, but every time I opened my mouth, all I could hear was a sob in my throat, then all the words that had been strung together were swallowed back, producing the deepest groans of sorrow. So, I could only be silent, accepting everything steadfastly.

After saying such a cruel thing, Sunyeon immediately entered the building followed by two big men who dragged me just now.

Weakly, under the cold, dark skyline, I walked to the side of the building, leaned one arm against the wall, and slumped slowly down. I stared ahead at the rows of wreaths inscribed condolences with tears in my eyes.

In my heart I kept muttering, 'Donghwa, someone just insulted me, won't you help me?'

However, because I knew it was useless, so I could only lower my head, burying my face between my two knees which were slightly trembling while thinking about why this all happened so fast.

I should have left him first and he was the one crying over me. But, why should I cry for him now?!

I hate this truth so much!

I once read a quote in a book, "Life is the most pleasant lie, and death is the most frightening reality." The quote was very accurate. But, I wondered, 'why do so many people still choose to face such frightening thing with their own hands?

Is there something beautiful behind that?

My mind was messed up. I didn't even know why I thought all that.

However, somehow when I started thinking about death, my heart felt like it was being stabbed by needles, so I stroked my chest after I reviewed the various feelings inside of me, hoping the pain in my heart subsided.

There was no joy in this place. Everything was just sadness again and again continuously as if this world was indeed made of pain and suffering, which made people live only to cry all the time. Or... was I the only one feeling the bad side of the world after years of happiness?

In the midst of this sadness, Daehyun's image suddenly flashed through my mind, like the wind gradually bringing warmth to my heart. I slowly lifted my face, staring blankly straight ahead with a weak smile, drawing emptiness in my eyes.

When I was at this point, he was the only person who was always by my side, encouraging me with his various wise words as a just and prosperous person.

If Daehyun were here, no one would have said such a cruel thing to me — no one would have dared to commit such an insult to me. He was like a human shield willing to be pierced by a spear just to protect a rusty silver which he considered the most precious metal.

However, from all those sacrifices, he had to endure quite heavy hardships. He had sacrificed everything — even the dignity and self-conception of his life, and it was all because of me.

Remembering him, I laughed stupidly. As long as I was with him, I kept trying to find back the feelings I had thrown away. However, no matter how deep I searched, I only found boundless void and darkness. So I gave up, hoping the time would find them.

But, seemingly, until this second the time had given me nothing, I had not felt that feeling even in the slightest.

In the freezing cold of the night, I had nowhere to stay. I looked at my trembling fingers, saw a different ring, and weakly clenched my fists tightly. I just remembered that I was no longer wearing our ring. I was really stupid.

The wind blew with snowflake, froze my tears, then spread all over my body, making me shiver.

However, what could I do? This city was too indifferent to other people's conditions, so I could only smile, lamenting my fate. Frozen to the dead would be better with how I felt right now. I didn't want to bring feelings of pain, regret, and sorrow, other than good memories for two people.

However, when I thought more deeply, my heart had actually been frozen to death for a long time. Not because of the cold winter air, but the amount of unbearable pain in it.

"Mr. Park?!"

A familiar voice suddenly sounded from a distance.

I immediately turned weakly and saw Hoonsik walking towards me in a hurry.

Hoonsik dropped the two white plastics in his hands and crouched down. There was obvious concern in his voice, "Mr. Park, why are you sitting out here? The weather is very bad today. You must come inside immediately."

He grabbed my arm, trying to help me up, but I didn't move an inch. I felt my lower body go numb.

Hoonsik said again very anxiously as he took off his coat and covered my cold body, "Mr. Park, let's go inside. It's cold out here."

I tried to smile, but my lips felt frozen, so I just opened my mouth slightly and said in a whisper, "I can't. Sunyeon won't let me in."

"What?!" Hoonsik was suddenly surprised. There was a clear look of anger on his face. "Who does he think he is?!"

Finishing his words, he immediately stood up and was about to walk in, but I weakly pinched the sleeves of his shirt so he crouched down in front of me again.

He sighed, then said, "He doesn't have that kind of authority. Let alone you, you are an important person for Mr. Lee, and I won't let anyone treat you like this."

I was stunned when I heard those words.

Hoonsik reached out and added, "Come here, Mr. Park. Let me help you. I will take you in. During Mr. Lee's life, he wanted to see you, he will be delighted this time."

I shook my head weakly and pulled my hand and put them to my chest. "I've seen him for a while. That's enough." With a pause, I asked, "And now, may I ask you a favor?"