《The Unnamed God. I’m Really Not A God You Guys !》The Unnamed God. I'm Really Not A God You Guys !
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That is when I hear the light tapping of my opponent's feet as she slowly approaches. Will this actually work? I'm a goddamn genius!
I'm just faking my own death, no issue there. The hardest part is remaining so very still. Don't wanna be one of the dead extras you see breathe on set. Actually…I'd be OP for that role! I can last for a while without breathing thanks to divine energy! I've verified that in the Void after all.
Just a little more, keep walking. Just a little…
That is when I feel water gathering around my head. Then, it especially sticks to my mouth and nose. She's trying to find out if I'm faking haha. But I will remain here as long as it takes! I just need to…
"*Scoff* Do you really think I am that dumb? I've heard all about how resistant you are! Actually, that's the only thing you got going for you, talk about useless. If choking doesn't work, I'll just have to get innovative I guess."
Wait, innovative?! I don't like the sound of that, at all! That's when she does something that scares me a lot. She mumbles something about imprisoning me forever to see how long I can actually last! How she even plans to do that I don't know, but still!
I can't wait anymore. I simply charge at her, but as usual, she dodges while insulting me. She's calling me a low life, a one-trick pony, ugly, and more. But there is no way I will give up! I'll show her how powerful the members of The Unnamed God Sect are!
So yeah, I'm running for my fucking life, or at least that's what it looks like. I am planning on using my super-secret tactical plan. I rush back as fast as possible toward the Water Queen's abode.
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Am I looking for protection? Not really, well kind of...but not from her. Actually, I'm not that bad at dodging anymore, unintended benefit! My naked friend is still near the entrance while sulking.
If I'm not mistaken, he's been vehemently turned down on his missionary mission. Poor guy just wants to help people, but it's just that his common sense is twisted. Oh well. If I want to motivate him I need to use his full title!
[Naked Emperor! I need your help!]
"*Sigh* I can't. I've tried to convince them before, and they have all turned me down. I am a failure as a …"
[Open your eyes! I'm getting chased right now! I need you to do something for me!]
"What is it?"
[How's your aim?]
"My aim?"
[Yes, your aim. Is it good?]
"I guess? What is this about?"
[Easy, throw me.]
"What?!"
[Shh, it's a surprise plan of attack!]
"*Whisper* I'm really not confident with my…"
[Look, Emperor. Don't believe in yourself, believe in the me that believes in you, and everything will be alright! Do you understand?]
"Eh…sure?"
[I said, do you understand?!]
"Yes!"
He suddenly gets up, no longer depressed. Damn, I should be a public motivator. I'm that good even when I'm not especially trying to help!
[Alright, here's what I want you to do…]
Hopefully, this will all work out. Let's just say the chase continues after our very short dialogue. The pink girl is still throwing pink balls at me trying to turn me into shreds. But honestly, all she's doing is effectively making me more and more naked as time goes by.
We really need to introduce peaceful conflict resolution in this world. Some will say that I kinda looked for it with my earlier stunt but screw them! Eventually, I do reach the ideal spot to fight her. It's a building that is very easy to climb.
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Most of the time she has a definite advantage. Flying is amazing, after all. She can ignore all obstacles completely. Meanwhile, I'm usually struggling to follow, but not this time around!
I dash toward her, she flies on some rooftop, but this time I'm right behind her! Just as I'm about to catch up she grins and suddenly moves out of the way. I was so damn close! So very close!
I can see that she derives pleasure from my failure. I'm in midair, stuck there like a dumbass and she's just watching. But that's when my trump card appears! The naked emperor himself. He comes nearby and throws me with his full force and…
Or he pushes me there with his head for some reason …
Still, his naked face serves as a wonderful springboard that allows me to jump once more. I want to say that I elegantly catch my opponent. I want to say that I am as graceful as an immortal. The truth is I simply get launched at her like a cannonball.
But! I do crash into my opponent thus taking her to the ground with me! In a crash, I have the advantage for sure! I'll just need to get my bearings quickly once we land and everything will be fine!
But I blank for a second. We are really crashing in style. Somehow, she manages to make us rotate in mid-air, so I am actually the one to take the brunt of the impact. She is almost fine while my body leaves a long gash in the road.
Now here is the weird part, extremely weird. At that moment, a miracle happens.
I used to believe that scene, where two people fall and end up in very compromising situations, was simply bullshit. You know the kind you see in trash harem anime, or not if you have taste…joke.
So yeah, let's just say her face is somewhere it really shouldn't be and so is mine. Ah, but there is nothing romantic or comedic with how much she's bleeding. Not enough to be life-threatening but I believe I've just won this fight!
*Sigh* I guess I can heal her while I'm at it, if she refuses to admit her loss when she wakes up I'll beat her up some more.
Now about this very particular situation that I am finding myself in right now…I have only one thing to say. She really, but really loves pink. Even down there it's…
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