Now Kaili looked into Dexter's eagle eyes, wanting to find answers there.

"That Kaili ... I ..."

"Dexter…" she interrupted Dexter's words, "5 years ago, I was raped at a banquet. I don't know who that man was. All I know was my whole body hurt. He ... he did that to me in a very mean and rude way. I was in pain but what hurts the most was my heart. I felt so humiliated and dirty. I felt like I didn't even have any pride left. Even I don't remember his face, and then what else did it mean I'm alive? At that time, my mind was chaotic. I tried many times to end my life.

I'm so depressed. I can only shut myself in the room. I wanted to tell others, but ... I don't have friends to share. What was more, if my father finds out. I will definitely be hidden, so as not to tarnish his name. I feel like I don't have confidence anymore. I'm ruined, Dexter!

Because of that, I hate my life. I hate when I had to live but had to listen to my father's orders, had to be kind to keep his name good, even though I'm not that good.

Since that time, I have lost the right to love. In fact, just thinking about it, I feel it's unfair to my partner in the future. I feel that I am very inappropriate. Especially when I meet you, I feel so dirty in front of you. I don't deserve it! Even I myself hate myself. I feel I was very despicable. I had no pride to stare at and even think about being side by side with you. I insulted you, avoided you so that you could hate me. By hating me, you would give up your love and pursued a love that was more worthy of you.

However, no matter how much I rejected you, you kept coming to me. It made me think that I wanted to tell you, but ... Silvia came. She said that you guys were engaged and you admit it too. I locked my intentions back because I was quite insecure when I saw Silvia. Only one sentence flashed through my mind, you deserve to be side by side with a graceful and honorable woman like Silvia ... "

When Kaili wanted to continue, Dexter hugged her tightly. His body trembled as she hugged Kaili. Kaili looked up, wanting to look at him, but Dexter avoided Kaili's gaze by making them hug each other tightly. He didn't want Kaili to see him who was crying. Dexter could no longer bear to hear the continuation of Kaili's story. He was now frustrated by himself.

After calming the storm in his heart, Dexter kissed Kaili's forehead, loosening his embrace. "It's late, go to sleep! Aren't you sleepy yet, hmm?"

"I ..." Kaili looked at him. "Don't you have anything to say?" Her heart would still be restless if Dexter didn't say anything.

Dexter hugged her. Kissed her forehead for a moment, "Kaili, honey, there are some things that when they are gone, just pass. Don't count it again! Otherwise, your life will be very tired, okay?"

Only Dexter knew what was in his chest right now. He had been terrified all along, trembling as if he was ready to fall to an unreachable depth.

"Dexter ..." Kaili heard it with great emotion. Her husband's response made her very satisfied. Finally, she is now a Kaili who has self-respect and self-confidence.

"Yeah, I'm right here, I'll stay by your side, okay." Again Dexter kissed her forehead. "Go to sleep, I will keep you to sleep, then I will sleep."

Kaili nodded quickly. To be honest, she was already very tired, crying so much, after having been so hard before! Not long, Kaili went into dreamland.

After Kaili slept, Dexter covered her up to her neck and then he walked to the balcony with bare feet. Dexter lit a cigarette and took a deep sip. He played with the smoke of the cigarette, making it into small spheres which the wind then toyed with until finally scattered together with the air.

From a stick of cigaratte, another stick, and went on until an ashtray full of cigarette butts. Dexter was not a smoker. When he touched this thing, it meant, his heart was upset. His mind kept wandering, his body was trembling, and even the chair he was sitting on was shaking too.

In his life, he had never known the word of fear. But right now, he was so scared that his soul was ready to fly away from his fragile body. How could he be that cruel, acting without thinking? Just because of a moment's emotion, he nearly hurt a woman's life, and that woman was the person he loved the most!

Dexter couldn't even imagine all the suffering that Kaili had endured during these 5 years because of his evil deeds! Thinking that Kaili's life for these 5 years had suffered greatly because of him, Dexter shuddered in horror. Did he still deserve to be called a human? Obviously, no!

'I'm depressed. I even feel, my right to love has been lost. I don't deserve anyone's love.'

Again, Kaili's words were buzzing in his ears. Her sad expression with a trembling voice holding back a deep sense of fear was exposed behind Dexter's eyes. He could see that Kaili was suffering a lot. What should he do?

Dexter, what the hell had you done?!

Unexpectedly, it turned out that the love that he had been waiting for so many years, which rejection always makes him suffer a lot, turned out to be all due to his own actions! He was the one who caused the love to avoid him! He was the one who caused that love always hurled insults at him.

What should he do? What if Kaili knew the truth? Would he lose his wife again? Of course, Dexter wasn't ready for that! He couldn't lose Kaili, even for one second!

But Dexter didn't have the face to see Kaili anymore! He was truly afraid. The guilt and regret making him lose face. How would Dexter behave to Kaili? Should he act as if none of this had anything to do with him? However ... He couldn't even act like that himself! He would not be able to live in peace and as if none of that had happened. His beloved Kaili had been afflicted by him!

Should Dexter avoid it, so that a little of the guilt would slowly disappear? No, no! He couldn't do that! If he stayed away from Kaili now, it would definitely be a huge blow to that woman. She would feel, Dexter's attitude was like that because of her confession. She would think that Dexter didn't accept her! Kaili's self-confidence, which had been painstakingly built up, would slowly fade again.

Dexter was not ready to see his wife would be in an unsettled life.

How would Dexter make amends? Was it enough to love Kaili more deeply and treat her well? Could that be called redemption? No! Even without that incident, Dexter was the only person who wouldn't want to see Kaili suffered! He would take care of his wife, treat her with respect, love her, even without what happened 5 years ago.