Hekkin’ finally! I mean, I was fine, but then I had a computer. With games and social media and all that good stuff.

You just had a knife and a table.

And what do you have now?

Teeth in jars!

Teeth… in jars. Yep. That is in fact what they are.

Lots of them! One whole wall is lined with shelves. And those shelves are filled with jars. Jars which contain one tooth each.

Some people are really grossed out by teeth. I’ve never really understood that. I mean, everyone has them. Every human over the age of about nine has lost a not insignificant number of them. If someone doesn’t have teeth, or an adult has never lost a tooth, this is a major issue.

I guess the thought of holding a tooth, that has recently been in someone’s mouth, is slightly gross on the basis that it was recently in someone’s mouth. But hand sanitizer is a thing, and so is soap and water, so it isn’t anything to completely freak out about.

Anyways, the teeth here are not human teeth.

Well, a couple of them are, because there are a lot of teeth here.

But the majority come from animals.

You’ve got a couple shark teeth, some petrified dinosaur teeth, several wolf teeth, beaver teeth, guinea pig teeth… Lots and lots of teeth.

Where do we get the teeth? How did we get the teeth? Well, wouldn’t you like to know.

Ok, fine. Most (all) of them… are fakes.

It’s amazing what you can find on Etsy these days. And while shipping real teeth, especially human teeth, may or may not come with legal problems, shipping something made out of plaster or porcelain is totally fine.

Then all we had to do is go to a local craft store, bulk-order the glass jars, and boom. Dozens and dozens of teeth for display.

After looking over the shelves for a while, admiring some of the particularly sharp and/or pointy teeth, you pick up a jar and open it. Inside is (in theory) a great white shark tooth. It’s pretty cool looking, all jagged on the edges and stuff.

You drop it into your hand, looking it over. For a tooth, it’s pretty big.

You spit the D20 into the jar, and pop the tooth into your mouth.

Yep, that’s what you just did. Ok.

The D20 landed on a 5. In case you wondered.

Then you close the jar, adjust the tooth in your mouth, and head back to the button.

DO YOU PRESS THE BUTTON? Yes No