C36 Sexy Boss Of The Trashy Mossy Forest Take 2

The next day, the guild, plus Eddie and his golems, headed off into the dungeon. The mood was better, more hopeful for the fight this time. The plan involved numerous strategies if things weren’t to go to plan. Eddie had been instructed to follow Mira which would be hard since her physical stats were double his; he was just going to have to keep up.

At the edge of Druid’s Recluse, the group no longer felt intimidated by the darkness of the forest in front of them. Neither did Eddie, which was a change since he was afraid of almost everything- including the feeling that he will spend the rest of his miserable life alone. Nevertheless, feeling confident, Eddie followed the group into the forest covered in the evergrowing moss.

The group encountered a few wooden hounds and were dealt with swiftly. They also didn’t knock down any trees either as they didn’t fancy fighting a mini boss again. They travelled through the forest and arrived at the boss’s location within an hour’s time.

They approached in their different groups and discovered the boss there, humming softly between three giant trees. The song was the same and she was still massaging more moss.

Akira looked back at Eddie and encouraged him to the front. Reluctantly, he followed.

“Do the thing you do again for Mira,” she said.

“Akira, I’m not some lady killer, I can’t just-”

“So you’ve come back to try your luck again,” the raid boss interrupted without looking up. Her voice was soft still and carried the eerie elegance one would expect from her.

“Sup,” Eddie said charismatically, running a hand through his dirty hair. “How about me and you ditch this place.”

The raid boss chuckled lightly. “My, my, you are persistent. I like my mortals like that.”

Eddie nodded approvingly, he had this one in the-

“But, I prefer a man of taller stature, and one that doesn’t look like he belongs in this filthy dump.”

Eddie opened his mouth in protest and his lips twitched angrily. “Well… I don’t like tall women anyway.”

“Because you are so small?”

“That’s it, I’ve heard enough. Trash Chute!” Eddie yelled, summoning his woggle staff. A dirty pink thong flew out of the hole and landed perfectly on her head.

Eddie gulped as the raid boss stayed motionless. She didn’t look at the thong, only wiggle her nose up at it. Her eyes then bulged and she moved her head slowly towards the trashmancer.

“You like that, huh?” Eddie joked.

You have dealt 8 damage to Elder Grand Druid, Level 31 (PSYCHOLOGICAL DAMAGE) (ENRAGED) (BITCH GONE CRAY-CRAY)

You have inflicted three status effects on a single target with a single spell or skill.

You have received the title: Triple Threat

This title offers no bonuses but it will always remind you that you summoned a thong onto a raid boss's head- that’s one for the books.

The raid boss screamed, echoing thousands of other voices. It was blood curdling and the guild members covered their ears to resist it.

“Eddie!” Akira screamed. “What did you do?”

“That bish got what she deserved,” Eddie yelled back with an accomplished grin on his face.

“You enraged it!” Akira explained. “It’s gonna be more pissed than me when you took me to Subway for our two year anniversary.”

“Oh no,” Eddie said, his face dropping into a worry. “Lady, raid boss, how about Olive Garden?!”

“AHHHHHHH!!!” the boss screamed again, going into a higher pitch. The yellow glow started building around her, only this time, it was faster like in the third stage.

“Behind the ents!” Akira ordered as she started running.

All the melee attacks spread equally around the three trees while the ranged attackers hid further back. The blinding blast pulsed stronger this time, and scorched the miss to a further degree.

“Attack!” Akira shouted.

The boss was engaged and the group matched her strengths. They were bouncing off each other, even Frank and Robo were in synergy. Eddie was flinging trash left, right and centre, nothing could stop this garbage man. Even when his mana was low, Eddie grabbed an alementy ale poison from his inventory and downed it. He was managing to keep firing his Trash Chute spell without his mana dropping below half.

He used Flash of Metal sparingly, only when his golems were about to take a heavy blow. It was more than useful and he wanted to kick himself for not using it before. He could even make Robo dodge a wooden spear from metres away and the next second be attacking the raid boss.

The guild was feeling good when the boss’s health ticked down into the second stage. They all caught their breath a dozen metres away behind the trees. Akira was watching the trees around the boss, they were going to turn into ents soon, she just couldn’t remember when. The special attack charged but the ents weren’t appearing. She glanced at her guild members, wondering if they were wrong.

Right before the special attack, a guild member was mauled from behind by a wooden hound.

“Behind us!” Akira shouted.

The group spun around and formed defensive positions; the melee attackers rushed to the front while trying to stay within the shadows of the trees. There stood 10 wooden hounds, snarling, approaching menacingly.

Without hesitation, Eddie summoned his walls and Grabby drilled his feet into the ground.

“Don’t let them push you in the blast!” Akira instructed. She turned to Brody with a worried look on her face. “This isn’t meant to happen.”

Brody slashed down a wooden hound and kicked it into the blast radius. “It’s a changing field boss, you’ll never know what they’ll do. We won’t be able to learn all its different stages.”

“Ship,” Akira cursed. She was going to have to play it by ear. She had a lot of experience but what Brody described was a huge pain in her backside. Regardless, she kept shouting orders. “Focus on the hounds!” she screamed. “Melee split into agile and defensive! Defensive, protect the mages and healers and cut down the rest of the hounds. Agile, kite the boss. We need to get rid of them as soon as possible!”

“Yes, Guild Master!” shouted everyone, including Eddie. He was confused himself but he knew that Akira could do this. He stayed with the group of mages with Grabby while Frank and Robo joined in kiting and damaging the boss.

Eddie fired a Trash Chute spell, alerting one of the hounds to him. Right before they pounced on him, he used Flash Of Metal and teleported Grabby in front of him. The Meat Mower tore into the wooden flesh of the monsters and killed it within seconds. Eddie couldn’t believe he had just done that; he used tactics, spells and cunning.

“I’m really gaming!” he exclaimed at the top of his lungs.

“Focus, idiot!” Mira screamed at him.

The rest of the hounds engaged the ranged and defensive melees. It was a tough battle but at least they didn’t have to deal with the constant attacks from the boss.

“We need healers!” Akira shouted over to the group.

The healers spun around, flinging balls of various shades of green towards the group that were kiting. Soon, the hounds were dealt with and the rest of the group engaged the boss. They took a few casualties but not enough to make a giant difference.

Eddie was chucking out spells like there was no tomorrow, there was a permanent poison in his mouth at all times as he used his three spells in absolute synergy. The trashmancer couldn’t be stopped. He was in the grove of fighting and the rest of the guild saw it. It might have been because his height was mentioned but the guild would never know. All that mattered was Eddie kicking ass.

“It’s going down to the last stage. Keep your distance from the trees again!”

The blinding light was quickening even faster than before because she was enraged and most of the group had to dive to get out of the way. Some died, instantly scorched by the powerful attack.

“That’s a healer gone!” Akira shouted, looking up at the group’s menu.

Just as the blast went off, the trees they were hiding behind shifted. Moss and bark bell off and the trees grew arms and legs. Not only did the ents come alive but also the moss. It started growing up in places, creating cover but also breaking up the available space. The boss started charging its special and they could tell it wasn’t going to a one off.

Once the ents started heading towards the guild, they all desperately ran for cover. Another blast went off and took out a few more.

“Melee! Keep the ents distracted. Keep at the back. All ranged, use everything you can on the boss, we need to burst it down or we won’t last wrong!”

Eddie popped his head out from behind cover and curved woggle staff where he fired Trash Chute off cooldown. Mira slung void spells after void spells and Akira chucked every bit of fire in her body towards the boss.

The boss seemed to have a damage resistance of sorts from the special attack she was constantly charging. Every bit of damage was reduced by 50%. Even with all the powerful attacks, its health was at three quarters.

“We need to disrupt her!” Akira bellow “We couldn’t control the blasts before but we should be able to disrupt her.”

“Are you crazy!” Mira shouted. “We can’t even get close.”

“I’ll do it,” Eddie said calmly after ducking his head beneath a pile of moss.

“Eddie, how?”

“My wall and my golems, trust me. You just need me to knock her over, right?”

Akira gulped. “You’ll die before you even get close.”

“Then tell my family I loved them.”

“Eddie, we don’t have a fam-”

Eddie was off, courage in his heart and flames in his body. This boss was going down and he was going to use everything he had. He was the trashmancer of this trash dump and he wasn’t going to let some tall, beautiful, immortal woman spoil it. He needed to finish this quest even if it cost him his golems and himself. He could always repair them.

Eddie shouted over to his golems, commanding them down the heap of moss he was crouched over.

“Sir,” Frank said. “Are we going all out?”

“You bet my left butt cheek, Frank. We need to interrupt it and I have a plan.”

“How foolproof is this plan, Sir?” Frank questioned worryingly; Eddie’s plans almost never worked.

“No time to explain, we would lose the dramatic impact. You guys just have to trust me.”

“Balls to the wall, Sir, I’m in.”

“Woof.”

“Alright, mate.”

“On three. Three-”

Eddie could hear badass music playing in the background. It was his time to shine and there was not going to be a convenient pipe for him to trip over on. The universe was with him, encouraging him to play the hero. He rolled over the mossy knoll with his golems by his side once a blinding attack had passed.

They sprinted straight for the boss. Eddie could tell that she knew it was him and the special attack came extra fast. He summoned Trash wall and curved it around himself and his golems. His mana plummeted, causing his head to throb.

The impact force destroyed a good portion of his shield but still he ran with his golems. They were nearing close and Eddie’s calves were burning. His stamina was in the red and his health was dropping but he still continued. Eddie ran around one side as Frank and Robo ran the other way; Grabby was still far behind.

The boss dismissed the blinding lights attack and summoned dozens of spears by her side. Eddie held his wall high as they came towards him. Frank and Robo were heavily damaged by them but continued on their path of distraction.

With the trash wall barely together he jumped on top of it and flew towards her. She knew he was going to try and knock her over so she summoned her blinding light attack with the small balls and vines. It appeared she really hated Eddie.

As Eddie got closer to her, he jumped and brought his wall up to knock her over. He thought he had it, he was so close. But then he was rained down upon by her singular attacks. It pierced the wall, some striking Eddie and his golems. The wall shattered into pieces right before the boss.

“NOOOO!!!” Eddie screamed. A spear had gone through his shoulder. He was now falling back down to the moss in slow motion.

“Nice try,” she teased with a smirk. “But unfortunately, I always win.”

Eddie spat out a mouthful of blood as a grin grew on his face. “FLASH OF METAL!”

Grabby teleported behind her with full momentum, his shields up and the Meat Mower on display. “G’day, mate,” Grabby said calmly as his heavy frame was mere inches from the boss.

She turned around and fear engulfed her face. All her teeth were knocked out in an instant and her beautiful face turned into one that hit every branch of the ugly tree and landed in a pile of toenails.

The immense force catapulted her towards the guild, her special attack was cancelled.

“Kill her!” Akira screamed like a viking.

Every single guild member ran over and bursted her down. As Eddie hit the floor, all he could was smile. He had sacrificed himself for the good of the trash dump. He prayed that it wasn’t in vain. He started coughing up more blood and realised it was his time.

A painful slap woke Eddie up. He jolted up, expecting himself to be among clouds but all he could see was Akira’s beautiful face looking down on him.

“Eddie! Eddie! Are you ok?”

“I feel fin-” Eddie coughed more blood up. “Akira,” he said weakly. “Tell our kids I love them.”

“Eddie,” she said, “we don’t have kids.”

Eddie started crying. “I don’t want to die.”

“Urm Eddie, it only pierced your shoulder. You’re not going to die.”

Eddie looked at the gaping hole in his shoulder and almost fainted. Only Akira’s stunning complexion kept from falling unconscious.

“Did we win?” Eddie croaked as he pulled a potion from his inventory.

Akira’s eyes welled up a little but she sucked them back up. She was not going to let Eddie see her cry. “Yes, Eddie, we did it, you did it.”

“It was pretty cool, wasn’t it?”

She smiled at him. “It was really hot.”

Eddie closed his eyes and puckered his lips, this was the moment he and Akira would confess their deep love for each other. As Eddie kept his lips pouted, Akira screwed up her face. “Eddie, I’m not ready for that yet.”

“Oh-” he coughed as the wound healed slowly. “You know I just thought the end of the boss fight and you caring for me-”

She put a finger to his lips. “You can take me out if you want.”

“Olive Garden or Subway?” Eddie joked as he laid back down again.

She started laughing uncontrollably, she couldn’t help herself. “You’re such an idiot… A steakhouse will do.”

Eddie thought about trying to kiss her again but he really just wanted to watch her smile and laugh. It was something he always liked to do.

“Excuse me,” Frank said, stepping in. “Is my master ok?”

Akira gave him a final wink before stepping away. “He’s fine, Frank.”

Eddie stood up, groaning. Frank quickly bent down to help him up. “Sir, I have to admit. That was undoubtedly the coolest thing I have ever seen.”

“I know, Frank. Are Robo and Grabby ok?”

“Woof,” Robo said.

“G’day.”

Eddie breathed a long sigh of relief.

DING! DING! DING!

Congratulations to The Wanderers and Eddie!

You have defeated The Druid Mother.

+2300 EXP

“I got the relic!” a healer shouted from the back.

Eddie and everyone else quickly headed over. The trashmancer was so excited, finally, he could create the settlement. He quickly took it from the healer and looked at it. It was just a seed, a tiny little green seed covered in moss. Eddie was expecting something over the top.

“Well, that’s a bit disappointing,” he commented.

{TIER 3 RELIC}

Seed of the Evergrowing Moss

This relic contains the essence of beauty, nature, healing, growth and power.

“It’s tier 3?” Eddie questioned.

“What?” Mira questioned, urging Eddie to show her. “Holy ship! That’s why it was so hard.”

Eddie looked confused for a moment and also tried to hold in a ‘that’s what she said’. “So it’s better?”

“Of course it’s better! Tier 3s are so hard to get!!!” Mira exclaimed. “This will make your settlement stand out against everyone else's.”

Eddie put his hands on his hips triumphantly. “Well guys, we did it. I really don’t know how to thank you.”

“How about a party?” Denzel offered.

“The party of the century,” Eddie corrected.