Qube had thought that there was a lot of pressure in being one of the Potential Companions. Then, once she’d actually become a full Prophecy Approved Companion, she’d realised that her life in the village had actually been unbearably easy. Now, however, she knew that being the Chosen One’s guiding light had been as breezy as an afternoon nap.

It was funny how having the being who had made your entire world personally charge you with its survival changed your perspective on some things.

“I’ll do my best to not cause the destruction of my entire world!” Qube said with her traditional cheerfulness.

“Well, when you put it like that, it doesn’t sound very good,” the dev replied.

“While I have no idea what actions of mine might be judged as bad, thus dooming everyone I have ever known or loved, I will try my hardest!” Qube continued.

The dev was looking pretty guilty at this point.

“Yeah, okay, I’m gonna go,” it said, slowly backing away. “Was there anything else?”

Qube quickly ran through all the stories she knew.

“If you have an epic weapon or mystical artifact of some kind, I believe this is when you’re supposed to give it to me?” she said uncertainly. The dev’s eyes widened.

“Oh no,” it said, backing away faster. “Who knows what giving you some kind of OP weapon would do?”

“But don’t you want to study the unknown? I thought you were interested in understanding strange anomalies,” Qube queried, still seated in the summoned armchair in the middle of the coliseum on the back of a giant turtle.

“In-world items only,” the dev said firmly. “In fact—” it waved its hand, causing the armchairs to disappear, dumping Qube on the ground. “Oh I’m sorry!” it yelped. “No, I didn’t mean to — that was an accident! You were meant to land on your feet!”

Looking up from her undignified position of being sprawled on her butt in front of her panicking creator, Qube realised two things:

The first was that this was the dev that the others had selected to speak to her on what seemed a pretty delicate diplomatic mission.

The second was that there was a very good chance that the “people” who had made everything she had ever known had no idea what they were doing.

Qube wasn’t entirely sure how to process the fact that the Golden Prophecy that had dictated her entire life appeared to have been written by people who occasionally forget that gravity exists, or that sitting people need their chairs to stay upright, but she was pretty sure that she was going to have some kind of mental crisis about it later on.

Not right now, though, as she was too busy trying to reassure her maker that she wasn’t going to go mad and try to destroy everything just because it’d made her fall over.

“No, it’s fine, please don’t worry about it,” she soothed the all-powerful dev. The dev slowly stopped hyperventilating.

“Okay, you’re sure? No lingering anger? No desire to burn everything?” the dev said.

Sewer Bard’s ode to fire flashed through Qube’s mind, but she kept that thought firmly inside her head and gave her best Understanding Smile.

“Of course not,” she said smoothly. “Now, if you don’t mind, would it be possible for me to get the Chosen One back? Not that I haven’t enjoyed your company, it’s just a little disconcerting to be talking to someone possessing my best friend.”

“Oh, sure,” the dev said awkwardly. “I — we, really, thought that it might be a good way to get to talk to you without causing any more… issues.” Qube gave it another Understanding Smile. The dev sighed. “It’s really creepy, isn’t it?” it asked sadly.

“Very,” Qube reassured it.

“Fine, we’ll try and find something more suitable for when we need to test the others,” the dev groaned, rolling its shoulders. “Which means more work. Great. Although they don’t seem as… special, as you, so maybe they wouldn’t notice —?” the dev started hopefully, then stopped when Qube cranked her Understanding Smile up a few more notches.

“Please don’t possess my friend just because you don’t want to do the work of making an avatar for yourself,” she said in her friendliest manner.

“Right,” the dev said, clearing its throat. “Well. This has been … enlightening. Certainly a lot to think about on both sides, right? I’ll be seeing you around.”

Qube tilted her head and smiled at the dev.

“Of course, teehee! Please don’t forget to return my friend!”

The dev paled slightly.

“Nope, not gonna forget! If you have any strange urges, like anger against those who made you, worries about the point of it all, anything like that, just, uh, let the Chosen One know and they can get in touch with us. Other than that, we’ll be watching over you.”

“I look forward to it!” Qube lied.

The dev gave her one last uneasy look then touched the Save Point.

Time shuddered.

The Chosen One’s body turned and looked at Qube. Then at the other party members, who were still huddled over in the corner of the coliseum. And finally, he turned around to look at the Mermaid Princess, who had at some point stopped talking and was just idly playing with her hair, ignoring the whole proceeding.

The Chosen One turned back to Qube.

“So… how weird were they?” he asked casually. “Super weird, right? OOF!”

The Hero staggered as Qube threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around him in a massive bear hug. She couldn’t actually get her arms all the way around his muscled form, but she squeezed him as tightly as she could to make up for it.

“Oh, Chosen One, it was awful! They looked like you but they weren’t you and they said they were going to destroy the entire world unless I did everything right and I don’t even know what is right because I just — I just, I only know how to be your guiding light and apparently that made me too much like you and they think that I’m the one who’s going to destroy the world but I’m not, I’m not, I’m going to save it! Even from the devs themselves and they are so weird and-and-and I missed you!” she ended on a wail.

The Chosen One, slightly taken aback by this outpouring of emotion, nevertheless hugged her back, lifting her off of the ground and squeezing before putting her down.

“So, you had fun while I was gone?” he asked playfully.

“No!” Qube replied, shocked. The Chosen One laughed. It was funny how the same action, laughter, performed in the same body, could look so radically different. Qube beamed up at him.

“I’m so glad you’re you again,” she said.

“Yeah, they mentioned that you weren’t the biggest fan of them borrowing my avatar,” the Chosen One gave a wry smile. “They were pretty grumpy about having to make a unique one to avoid you lot freaking out. Oh yeah, [Return].” He gestured at the others in the group, who started walking back to the duo.

“Did you — did you discuss me with the devs?” Qube asked, eyes round with wonder. “What did they think of me? Did I give a good impression? Did they think I was a good companion?”

Her confidence in her abilities as a guiding light aside, there was no way Qube was going to pass up the opportunity to discover exactly what her makers thought of her.

The Chosen One flashed her a cheeky grin.

“Well you certainly made a splash,” he said. “They’re all running around like headless chickens trying to figure out what to do next and whether or not they’ll get in more trouble for keeping quiet or making a fuss. Speaking of chickens, remind me to poke one next time we’re in a village or whatever. I have a theory I want to test out…”

“Chosen One, please focus,” Qube said, but without much expectation of being obeyed. The Chosen One had that faraway look in his eyes he got only when contemplating breaking things in new and exciting ways.

To her surprise, the Chosen One actually refocused on her.

“They also said that you wanted to continue on this quest,” he said, unusually serious. “Is that really what you want?”

Sewer Bard, Sexy Screamy Spider Lady, Definitely Bad Guy and Squiggles joined them. Qube looked around at her fellow party members, and felt her heart swell with love.

“I would like nothing more,” she said with total earnestness.

The Chosen One’s smile was almost dazzling in its brightness.

“Me too,” he replied simply, before turning and striding towards the Fishing Village. “Now come on! We’ve got a whole wide world to break!”

“You mean save, right, Chosen One?” Qube asked, trotting after him, the others following behind her like a comet’s tail. “Chosen One? Chosen One! Chosen One stop laughing and get back here!”

END OF BOOK ONE

Author’s note:

Well, this has been a crazy ride! Thank you so much to everyone who supported me on this journey, and cared about this band of glitches.

I’m going to do an epilogue, then a patreon-only preview of a VERY rough draft of chapter one of book two. After that, I’m going to take a month off.

Ever since I first got the idea for this two book series, there has been one person who has consistently supported me, listened to me read each and every chapter aloud to them, and helped me work through all the creative snarls that comes with storytelling.

Steven, you are the best of bros and housemates. This wouldn’t exist without you. Thank you.