Stepping into the next room, Qube moved some of Squiggles’s tentacles so she could see what was up ahead. She needed to be ready for whatever strange thing this Temple would throw at them next.

This area was larger than the previous one, but was just as dominated by a platform in the middle of the room. And at the top of the platform stood…

Definitely Bad Guy?! But … not. He was made of shadows, just like the previous otter. While the real Definitely Bad Guy stood out like a flame, this version of him seemed to suck in the light, creating an aura of darkness around him.

“Do you really think you’re worthy of their trust?” the not-Mage snarled. Same as last time, Definitely Bad Guy was also standing on the platform, facing off against his shadow self.

The real Definitely Bad Guy seemed enraged by his counterpoint’s comment. As well he should be, Qube internally seethed. Just because he’d been working undercover as a spy against the Evil Emperor was no reason for people not to trust him! If anything, they should trust him even more, because he’d proven how far he was willing to go for the side of Good! Anyone who doubted Definitely Bad Guy’s Goodness was going to have to face her!

“Enough, shade. Begone!” Definitely Bad Guy started hurling [Lesser Fireballs] at the shadow. But, strangely, they seemed to pass right through the insubstantial figure. How had Squiggles been able to shove the shadow otter in her mouth then?

Then the shadow unleashed a series of [Lesser Fireballs], somewhat answering her question. For each fireball that hit was very, very real. It both was and was not there.

“[Lesser Shield]!” she cried, as Definitely Bad Guy recoiled, clothes smouldering with black and purple flames.

“Okay gang, we need to move all the lanterns at the same time,” the Chosen One said, remarkably calm about the fact that one of his companions was facing off against himself. “They don’t snap back immediately, so yank down one and then run to the spare one to your right and pull that one as quickly as you can.”

“[Fire Wall],” the Good Definitely Bad Guy protected himself from the Evil Definitely Bad Guy.

“Your master knows your heart wavers,” the shade sneered. “Do you really think they will accept you if you turn to them? What use is a disloyal tool? Far better to discard it.”

Definitely Bad Guy scoffed angrily.

“My heart has never wavered,” he said with the utmost confidence.

For a moment the shade looked … not confused, but more mildly put off, like their drink was a different flavour than what they were expecting.

“You care too much for them. You will never complete your mission,” it said, but with slightly less certainty than before.

“I will complete it even if it costs me my life,” Definitely Bad Guy said with quiet passion.

The three companions took their places at the various lanterns. Only Sewer Bard and Sexy Screamy Spider Lady ended up having spare lanterns next to them — it would be the work of a moment to redirect the lanterns.

“Not so fast, heroes,” the Mage’s shadow suddenly unleashed a torrent of dark fireballs, driving the group away from their ropes.

“Dude,” Chosen One snapped at the real Definitely Bad Guy, “keep it occupied so we can do this.” He’d managed to avoid being hit by any of the black fireballs, but he still looked decidedly displeased.

“A pleasure,” Definitely Bad Guy said and released his [Fire Wall] spell. “[Curse],” he commanded, as his blood-red mana coursed out of him. The shade recoiled, and screamed in pain as its non-existent skin broke out into blistering boils.

“A choice is coming, puppet of the more powerful,” it hissed.

“Huh, so non-physical damages it,” the Chosen One said thoughtfully.

“Chosen One!” Qube snapped.

“Oh yeah, let’s see how it goes this time!” The Chosen One refocused. “Ready-set-go!”

The others pulled their ropes, redirecting the lanterns. Sexy Screamy Spider Lady and Sewer Bard ran towards the untouched ropes to their rights, and quickly pulled them, too. Once again the Chosen One lined up his bent stick, and flung it through one of the lit torches lining the room. It caught alight, and started bouncing from unlit lantern to unlit lantern, each one lighting up as the stick touched them, never losing its flame.

Qube had no idea how the bent stick could redirect itself to the next lantern after each hit. How had it not lost momentum? The spells woven through it must be powerful indeed. And to keep the fire for so long without itself burning! She would have to examine it more thoroughly some time.

The Chosen One then flung the bent stick’s twin in the other direction, through another lit torch. It started lighting the lanterns on the right, moving around the room in the opposite direction of its twin (parent? creator?).

As they met in the middle lantern, the shade suddenly changed, solidifying into a more tangible form.

“[Lesser Fireball]!” Definitely Bad Guy cast again and again. The first one hit and then… the bent sticks, continuing their opposite journeys around the room, hit the already-lit lanterns, instantly snuffing them out.

The shade reverted back to its shadow form.

“Looks like you need to be a bit faster pulling those ropes, heroes,” it gave the Chosen One the most condescending look Qube had ever seen.

“I was testing something!” The Chosen One looked genuinely angry for a second, then shook his head to clear it. “Okay, let’s do it again, no messing about. This guy is even more annoyingly smug than the original. I didn’t even think that was possible.”

Definitely Bad Guy took a moment out of his fight to the death with himself to throw the Chosen One a look of irritation.

“Will you help the rightful rulers regain their place, or will your darkness prevail? Choose wisely, puppet.”

“Pull!” the Chosen One commanded and, the instant all the lanterns were down, he flung a single bent stick, relighting all the lanterns. Once again the false Definitely Bad Guy’s form solidified.

“[Lesser Fireball], [Lesser Fireball], [Lesser Fireball],” Definitely Bad Guy cast, each one slamming into his shadow self.

The shadow staggered after the first one, fell to his knees after the second, and finally collapsed after the third.

“Fool,” it hissed, and dissipated.

The platform slowly lowered itself to the floor as a section of the wall slid away, revealing another dark entrance. Definitely Bad Guy, rather than rejoining the group, instead continued to look at where the shadow had … died? It hadn’t dropped any bags of coins, so Qube wasn’t entirely sure how one would classify its mortality status.

The Mage crouched down, and examined the floor where the enemy had… disappeared? But that implied it might come back. Or maybe it would, after the lanterns were gone.

Definitely Bad Guy stood up, and walked away from where ...

Where the shadow had been vanquished, she eventually decided, before quickly realising that she should probably be paying attention to the man who had just been forced to vanquish himself.

The Chosen One was pulling on one of the ropes, trying to get the attached lantern to budge. Interestingly, after the shade had been defeated, they seemed to remain locked in place, facing where the platform had been.

Definitely Bad Guy quietly took his place by Qube’s side, and watched the Chosen One attempt to solve whatever mystery gripped him.

“How are you feeling?” Qube asked tentatively. The Mage looked introspective, but not nearly as troubled as Qube would expect from someone who had just had his shadow self spouting horrible lies to him.

Maybe she should reassure him? Let him know how important he was to the group? She glanced over at Sewer Bard and Sexy Screamy Spider Lady. Oddly enough, neither of them seemed particularly interested in comforting their fellow party member. Sewer Bard was looking at them, true, but he was also idly playing his lute, and humming a song to himself. Sexy Screamy Spider Lady was just mindlessly bouncing in place directly behind the Chosen One.

If they felt any trepidation about what lay ahead, they didn’t show it.

“You know we don’t believe what that thing was saying,” Qube started. She mentally reviewed the group, and hastily revised her statement: “I don’t believe what that thing was saying. I hope it didn’t affect you in any way.”

Definitely Bad Guy continued watching the Chosen One’s antics like they were the most interesting thing in the world.

“This is the Shadow Temple. That … thing … was my shadow. It attempted to tap into my greatest fears,” he said, as if that were a perfectly ordinary thing. “But it failed.”

“It did?” Qube blinked. What else was he afraid of, then?

“Yes, well, you see, there is —” the Mage started to slip into a more formal tone of voice, one Qube was starting to recognise as his “explaining” voice, when he pulled himself up, and looked over at Sexy Screamy Spider Lady.

“What I truly fear is the devs,” he said simply. “I did not understand many things that became clear once I realised your relationship with them. And how they, in turn, fear you.”

“The devs don’t fear me!” Qube exclaimed, shocked.

“They do,” Definitely Bad Guy said with quiet conviction. “You hold power that they do not understand, and thus they fear you. They compare you with their Chosen One, but you are not constrained by their Golden Prophecy like he is. They claim that they made this world, and yet they cannot control it.“

“When you… when we first met, the power you demonstrated was beyond anything I had ever experienced before. I now know why both the Chosen One and the Evil Emperor look to you. It is that power within you, capable of making even those who fashion themselves as gods tremble.

“I thought this conflict was about who would rule the kingdom. But now… now I know that his vision expands beyond that.” The Mage abruptly cut himself off, and looked around. Fortunately, no one seemed to be paying attention to his speech. Nevertheless, he lowered his voice.

“I know you do not doubt me. For I am, as always, yours to command.”

Qube wanted to vomit. She’d never actually thrown up before, but this seemed like a good time to start trying. The sheer intensity of his speech was far too much. Not to mention the things he was saying… she wasn’t sure if he was just being romantic (which was stressful in a totally different way) or if he actually believed she was so important.

To pit her against the devs themselves! Did he really think the Chosen One would do such a thing? Or did he think that was something she wanted to do?

Either way, she was deeply, deeply uncomfortable. She just needed to find a way to express that…

“Thank you, but I don’t think that would be a good idea, teehee!”

Perfect.

The Chosen One, having finished with his experimentation, turned back to the rest of the group.

“Ah, too close!” he jumped as he realised just how close to him Sexy Screamy Spider Lady was. “Why are you so close? Space, please!”

Sexy Screamy Spider Lady scuttled back a bit, looking sulky.

“Okay, so, next one will hopefully be less of a pain in the [ankle], so we’ll actually get to have fun with it,” the Chosen One started. Then he paused as a thought struck him. “It will probably be a shadow version of one of you two,” he told Sexy Screamy Spider Lady and Sewer Bard. “Would you be okay with it saying [snacks] while I — I mean we — test a few things?”

How did he know? Qube pulled out “A Gentleman’s Guide to the Seven Temples,” and opened it to the second page.

The Shadow Temple, it read, in the fanciest cursive she’d ever read, is a place even the bravest gentleman would be advised to steel himself before entering. It is said that inside one may face his darkest self.

She supposed it was only logical to assume that his other companions would also face off against themselves. Still, his quick thinking and care for their feelings once again filled her with admiration.

“Whatever you think best, my darling,” Sexy Screamy Spider Lady said, once again advancing towards him.

“I sincerely doubt there is anything this shade could say that would affect me, Noble Patron,” Sewer Bard said confidently.

“Sweet, let’s go!” the Chosen One said and, without any further questions, plunged into the darkened entrance.