Everything burned gold.

Qube blinked at the dazzling sight before her. Was this — had she died? Were her inner coins now some enticing bag somewhere on that black disc?

Slowly, she reoriented herself and realised three things: one, she was still holding the True Fire’s twin. Two, they were back in the Giant Lava Slime’s abode. And three, the King Salamander and his entire court were there, the giant golden throne precariously carried by four clumps of minor noble salamanders.

“Thisss will not ssstand, you overgrown ssslime!” the King Salamander hissed at the elected ruler of Lava Slime.

“The lava slime people existed here long before you showed up!” the Giant Lava Slime screamed, its voice coming through the metal box. It paused for a moment, its crown slipping somewhat. “Probably,” it added.

“Sssee, you don’t even know!” the King Salamander’s various lizard-made limbs writhed in a disturbing manner as the smaller salamanders that made up the King Salamander began running around in agitation.

“Well, we never went to the golden room!” the Giant Lava Slime protested. “So how are we supposed to know when you came? But we’ve been here ever since the True Fire was born, so we have to have been here before you!”

“We were here before the True Fire wasss born!” the King Salamander raged. “Our dragon kin are the only reassson it even exissstsss! Thisss volcano isss oursss to rule over! We will not have sssome usssurpersss taking what isss rightfully oursss!”

Qube was almost certain that the King Salamander was deliberately choosing words with S’s in them. He had proven that he didn’t need to hiss while talking — why was he doing this? Or maybe he was so agitated that he had lapsed back into it.

Qube looked at the Giant Lava Slime, and all its smaller slime... family? Subjects? Community? Behind it. While her mind still struggled to understand the idea of an elected official, if that chaos seemed to work for them, then they were certainly entitled to the True Fire, as it was literally the source of sustenance for them.

On the other hand, the way of the King Salamander and his people made a lot more sense to Qube. The fact that the King was made up of most of his subjects was actually rather pleasing to Qube, since everyone knew that the people and its land were directly impacted by how good of a person their king/queen was, and that the king/queen owned their people, so the visualisation of this truth was quite nice. And they needed the True Fire to evolve into dragons! Qube had never seen a real life dragon (she refused to count that scribble dragon from the black disc) and she very much wanted to. And they would have the law on their side...

Clearly both parties had a lot of weight and power in their stances, and the Chosen One was going to have to think about this very carefully...

“Hey, think fast,” the Chosen One said, casually scooping the second True Fire from Qube’s clutches and then throwing the first True Fire at the Giant Lava Slime and its twin at the King Salamander.

The True Fires hit the respective rulers at the exact same time.

The first True Fire hit the Giant Lava Slime square in the face. The Giant Lava Slime opened its razor-circle mouth and let forth an unearthly scream as it expanded, the flame burrowing within it and then exploding outwards, gouts of fire spitting out in steady streams, pouring liquidised flame onto the other, smaller lava slimes. These smaller slimes also began to sing-scream, as their squishy bodies drank in the long-denied nourishment. They swelled, and tiny circles of blush appeared on their now-chubby cheeks. Each slime began to smile, and started sloshing about in the communal magma, making happy chirruping noises.

The second True Fire slammed into the King Salamander, breaking him apart. Every individual salamander spun as they whirled through the air, and on each of their foreheads there was a tiny flame, as if the True Fire had smashed into a million sticky pieces. Even the minor noble salamanders were struck by shards of the True Fire, and each threw back their now-aflame heads and roared their approval. Small wings burst from their backs, and they started all flapping their newly-formed wings, their combined efforts whipping the magma out of the lake and creating eddies of red-hot death.

And then things got strange.

Well. Comparatively speaking, anyway.

The magma, disturbed by both the lava slimes’ dancing and the gusts kicked up by the winged salamanders, began splattering against the volcano walls. The salamander’s magma turned a brilliant gold, and the lava slimes’ magma turned a deeper shade of red. The rock beneath the party’s feet rumbled, and a golden doorway opened, showing the black road and deathlands that the group had walked through to get to the Fire Temple in the first place. But, as Qube stumbled a step towards it, mildly thrown by the mini earthquake they were experiencing, the doorway flickered, and the dragon-embossed gold was replaced with a doorway made of dripping red magma, with little lava slime statues oozing down it like a slow moving waterfall.

The volcano’s walls, too, flickered between gold and red, at one moment seeming like a recreation of the golden throne room up ahead, with walkways for salamanders and a giant throne, and in the next moment all slow-moving magma for walls and cushions everywhere.

It was almost as if there were two volcanoes in the same space, fighting for dominance. Disoriented by the constant changing, Qube had to fight against the instinct to close her eyes. She was witnessing the transformation of a Temple into a new form! This would be invaluable for her research on Temple Implied Magic and Existing Sentience! And there was no way she could be a pioneering scholar in T.I.M.E.S. if she allowed herself to be distracted or miss such an important moment!

...She could call it TIMES research to save time.

Meanwhile, the entire world around Qube continued its nightmare dance between Slime and Salamander land.

The golden throne that the salamanders had brought down from the upper level was transformed, becoming embedded in the now-golden rock beneath them. The now-winged salamanders swarmed around it as one of them grew to a tremendous size and sat on the throne in a very uncomfortable-looking crouch.

On the other side of the cavern each of the slimes now rested on their molten cushions that gently bobbed up and down in the magma, settling into a loose semi-circle around their elected leader, who now sat atop the biggest and reddest cushion of them all.

Within a few minutes from receiving the True Fire the flurry of transformation had ceased, leaving the King Salamander and the Giant Lava Slime sitting on their respective sides of the room. They both stared fixedly at the Chosen One, neither acknowledging the other. Not that they really could have — as one flickered into existence, the other disappeared, taking their themed decor with them, only to pop back into reality and knock the other one out a few moments later.

Qube turned to the other party members, expecting them to be as awed as she was at this strange and frankly unprecedented dual transformation.

Sewer Bard was looking rather ill and very, very unhappy. Come to think of it, he had been looking out of sorts ever since they’d arrived in the Fire Temple. He hadn’t even hit on any of the slimes or salamanders — not even the ones which seemed like they would have had very beautiful souls! Even his exquisite outfit was starting to look a little bit tattered around the edges, the curl of his cap’s feather starting to droop a little, and the excess of frothy lace on his sleeves was beginning to fray.

Perhaps he wasn’t feeling well? Qube resolved to try and [Heal] him once they left the Fire Temple and there was enough room for him to run around while her spell took effect. Sure, it would be unsettling to have him constantly trying to flirt with her, but her duty as a Healer came first!

Sexy Screamy Spider Lady’s various faces were looking rather green too, and not just from the venom dripping from her fangs. The children’s faces were looking decidedly unwell, as if the constant flickering was making them dizzy. Rather than doing her normal bounce from leg to leg to leg to leg, each jiggle making her thorax and abdomen bounce, she instead was standing stock still. Qube realised she’d never seen Sexy Screamy Spider Lady not moving— she had always been slightly active, drawing the eye towards her.

Definitely Bad Guy, however, seemed almost indifferent to the constant switching. Instead he’d pulled a book out of somewhere from within his red robes. Did he have pockets, Qube wondered, perhaps even pocket magic? Maybe he could teach her about pocket magic while also teaching her his newly acquired [Curse Person]. She would have to make sure that the Chosen One wasn’t around, though, so he would never learn that she was so deficient in what seemed to be a most commonplace magic!

The question of why it didn’t bother her that Definitely Bad Guy would know of her ignorance of pocket magic was easily brushed aside. He was a Mage Advisor; it was his job to advise others on magical matters. The Chosen One was relying on her, as his Childhood Companion, to guide him in all matters.

The Chosen One needed her. It was clear enough that without her he would be totally and utterly lost.

---

“Thank you, Light Bringer, for bringing Order to our people,” the newly-single reptile King Salamander hissed, before disappearing. The Giant Lava Slime suddenly appeared on the left side of the room.

“Thank you, Chosen One, for overthrowing those Salamanders!” the Giant Lava Slime sing-screamed from its massive cushion.

“Loot, please,” the Chosen One reached out a hand towards the Giant Lava Slime, which vanished. The King Salamander appeared on the right side of the room. The Chosen One swung his hand around to the giant reptile.

“Now we can evolve into our true formsss,” the King Salamander continued, not to be interrupted.

“Loot,” the Chosen One repeated. The King Salamander and his golden theme flickered, replaced by the Giant Lava Slime popping into existence.

“Now we can live our lives according to our own rules, and grow as lava slimes! Well fed, happy slimes! Your name-” the Giant Lava Slime began bouncing in excitement, only to once again disappear into the void. The Chosen One, looking intrigued, wandered up to where the Giant Lava Slime had been and stuck his hand into the empty air.

“Will go down in history,” the King Salamander declared from across the room. The Chosen One ignored him, hand still in mid-air. “We would have you be known asss friend to the-” King Salamander vanished, and the Giant Lava Slime and its people popped back into existence.

Directly where the Chosen One’s hand was.

Qube screamed as the Chosen One’s entire arm was engulfed by the Giant Lava Slime. The Giant Lava Slime looked down at the Chosen One with its giant eyestalks, an expression of deep surprise and growing offense on its squishy face. And then it seemed to contract, and both the Chosen One and the Giant Lava Slime exploded away from one another.

The Chosen One’s arms flailed about wildly as he spun head over heels, like a giant pinwheel. The Giant Lava Slime, on the other hand, bounced off of the semi-circle of its temporary subjects and jittered about, each smaller slime that it hit ricocheting off of another one, causing an endless cascade of slimes bouncing around the cavern with distressing but still somehow adorable squishing sounds.

“Chosen One! [Lesser Shield]!” Qube cried, running to catch him. But the Hero, being airborne, was a fair bit faster than her, and slammed into the cavern wall an instant after it changed from magma to golden pathways. The surplus of bouncing slimes also disappeared, but something about their vanishing seemed to disturb the air and sent the multitude of flying salamanders careening about.

“Chosen One, are you injured?” Qube ignored the choir of tiny thumps and squeals as the flying salamanders careened around the room, bumping into each other. The Chosen One, looking mildly stunned, staggered to his feet. He looked over at the King Salamander, who was being peppered with his projectile people.

Qube held her breath, waiting to see what he would say about this truly bizarre situation. The Hero reached out a hand to the monarch.

“Now,” the Chosen One said, palm outstretched. His eyes seemed to unfocus. “Loot?”

Then, after a beat, he vomited.