“Mary wants to become a violent dungeon.” Said Theanore to Marinus as they were picking the greens for Mary’s salad. While Mary did frown at this addition to her dinner, she kept eating the salads. Mostly because her dry patch of skin was getting better. It was because she no longer sat by the fireplace, but no one wanted her to stop eating salads, so everyone kept quiet.

“Well, we can’t have that. She is our daughter, and it is our duty to make sure she grows up good and kind.” Said Marinus. He pulled at a particularly stubborn salad and managed to get it out of the ground, roots and all, at the fourth pull.

“I have been thinking, she doesn’t like playing at being a merchant with the other children, nor does she like reading or writing much. But she does fawn on Freddy.” Said Theanore. She, unlike Marinus, was picking easier things. Like green onions and radishes. And she was doing so with a small hoe.

“Who is Freddy? She is too young for boys!” Said Marinus, outraged. Theanore giggled.

“Freddy is her cactus. She is waiting for him to sprout a male nymph. She thinks Freddy is her son.” Said Theanore and Marinus calmed down.

Well, while Theanore was less than a year old and already had family, Marinus didn’t want the same for Mary. It had been pure chance that Mary was born. Besides, the most Marinus did with Theanore was to hug her and kiss her cheek from time to time. So, it was all very proper.

“Are there even male nymphs?” Asked Marinus, doubtfully. He was sure there were not. Besides, doesn’t a nymph appear immediately after planting? “How long has Freddy been planted?”

“A day.” Said Theanore, and she went and picked some spinach leaves for Mary’s salad. Mary liked spinach well enough, as long as it was seasoned with lemon juice.

“Then nothing will spring out of it. But I don’t see why she can’t be stirred towards agriculture. We can have her attend the farmer lectures in Mirstone and…”

Harry came running towards them, looking fearful, and he stopped to catch his breath. Tod was clutching to his back and looking just as afraid.

“Thea, Marinus, you have to see this. There is a tiny old man sitting on a cactus in the new greenhouse that curses like with pastry words!” Said Harry, and then he ran towards his house to hide.

“Tiny old man?” Asked Theanore, then her brain connected the dots. “Freddy! Freddy is alive.”

Marinus and Theanore placed the greens they already had collected down and ran towards the greenhouse. There was a crowd of children surrounding it, and from inside angry mutterings were heard.

“For the last time you bleeding muffin heads, I am a satyr, not a nymph!” Screamed an old man’s voice from inside.

Theanore entered to see a pixie sized old man with horns and goat legs sitting on the Ogre’s demise cactus and eating the blossom. The thing huffed when he saw her and raised a finger at her.

“Name is Freddy and don’t you forget it! I am a satyr, not a nymph. I come from a cactus, and I am here to stay.” Said Freddy all in one breath.

Theanore went and touched Freddy’s head with one small finger. He had a soft fuzz on his head that had the same feeling as a goat’s hide.

“Hi, Freddy. I am your grandmother, Theanore.” Said Theanore with a smile. Freddy snorted and swatted at Theanore’s finger until she removed it from his head.

“Sure, you are, and I am a nymph! Look, miss, you look old enough to still go around in a diaper, let alone have children! You are no one’s grandmother. I was not born today, either. I travelled long, my soul was separated from my body for two years, until I found something that can sustain me. This cactus was planted by a nymph in a mana rich soil. Still, I am tiny. What a rotten bonbon.” Said Freddy with another huff.

“This Ogre’s demise was planted by my daughter, Mary. You are her son. Thus, you are my grandson.” Said Theanore stubbornly. Freddy was so going to get a spanking if he cursed around her one more time.

“Nymphs don’t have parents, miss. They have trees, and satyrs have plants in general. You don’t have a daughter, ow.” Theanore had swatted Freddy on the bottom gently, but for someone this tiny, it still hurt a lot.

Freddy rubbed his behind and glared at Theanore. He opened his mouth to show needle shaped teeth and made to bite her hand when she was pulled away by Marinus.

“Nymphs do have parents. Theanore has a mother, Esmer and a father, Crassus. And Mary has me, Marinus, and Theanore as parents. Don’t upset my wife anymore.” Said Marinus. Freddy sighed and rubbed his brown hair.

“Look, tiny red, you keep your woman from violence because if you don’t, I will resort to violence too. I just want a quiet place to live during my old age. I will regress to being young again in about 25 years, and then I will move from here. Furthermore, I eat greens and only greens, like to sleep in hay so place some around the cactus, and like to drink rum. The pleasure of having me is all yours.”

Theanore and Marinus stared at the satyr, not believing how self-centered he was. Then, someone pushed pass them. They saw a blur of red, and suddenly Freddy was being picked up and hugged.

“I knew you would be born. I am your mommy. I will teach you everything I know and then in a couple of years when I grow up, we will make the most feared dungeon in the world.” Said Mary as she squeezed the life out of Freddy.

“Get off, you darn strawberry shortcake. I am not your son. I am a satyr and I use plants to sustain myself. Get off, I said.” But Mary wasn’t listening as she began listing all the things they will do once she becomes a dungeon core, much to her parents’ disapproval.