《Formicea》Chapter 79
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Directly outside of Honiu's quarter, Chitu is already waiting for me.
Even without the pheromones, her bearing tells enough about the deep distress she's in.
(C)
Uh, right now she's basically a child begging me to have mercy on her parent.
Even if I think I'm in the right, it's hard not to feel guilty seeing this.
(F)
(C)
Well, as anticipated she doesn't buy this explanation.
(F)
(C)
(F)
It's not a novel discovery that it's not good to never move and avoid all physical exertion.
I don't know too much about insect bodies, but I fear that Honiu's might be the same.
I simply cannot believe that it's healthy if she never leaves her bench and lets her servants do all the things she could do on her own.
Chitu isn't taking my statement too well.
Rather, she panics distinctively.
(C)
(F)
(C)
Immediately she guides me to a small room filled with those mushrooms.
There's also right away some kind of tray to transport them.
After this, she brings me to another room.
I need a moment to process that I'm in a great hall filled with nectar units.
Sadly the entombed kind.
Erys didn't want us to see them, but it was kinda inevitable as we were most of the time in her courtyard.
Anyways, I have an idea regarding what comes now.
Chitu procures a vessel and hands it to me.
(C)
The implications worry me deeply.
I really would like to abstain, but I guess I'll have to get used to it.
They're basically their cows and necessary for the swarm.
Slightly reluctantly I move closer and touch the thing which I believe is the gland.
The touch is almost sickening soft, but there's a slight pressure from within.
I touch it like I would with a cow and shortly after a stream of thick, yellowy liquid escapes.
I manage to catch most of it with the vessel, which I place on the tray.
I want to wash my hands but all I have for that would be Chitu's cleansing fluid.
After that, I'm done and can return to Honiu.
(H)
Yes, sure, likewise!
I place the tray with her meal on the next stool and wait.
(H)
She raises herself into a sitting position and then spreads those clamps on each side of her mouth while also opening the same vertically.
Oh no, I won't!
Hell, will I do and put my hand in there!
(F)
(H)
For a second I consider doing so before I regain my mind.
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After this, I'm just annoyed.
(F)
Well, she's at least taken aback.
(H)
(F)
(H)
Instead of answering I move over to the tray, take a mushroom, and nibble on it.
I know when a child is throwing a tantrum and the best course of action is to let it run out of stamina.
The taste is pleasantly sweet as usual.
I haven't told my family as I didn't want to worry them but ever since the change this particular taste became even better for me.
This might have something to do with how my throat changed or something like this.
I don’t know.
But it’s a fact that I can enjoy them now much more.
Honiu on the other side clearly grows impatient, but I won’t budge.
(H)
She glances at me, but I stay intentionally indifferent to show her that I have no intention to give in on this matter.
Huh, maybe I've pushed her a little too far.
Seems like she's totally through with the world.
However, this isn't what I aimed for.
Not in the slightest.
I want that she gets her act together and not break her.
(F)
want is a nurse who actually acts according to her role!> (H)
(F)
(H)
(F)
She blinks at me with those ominous second eyelids so she doesn't have to cease her bewildered stare.
you seriously asking me what my problem is?!> (H)
(F)
She still stares.
But not anymore with simple bewilderment.
Now she's rather... brooding, for lacking a better word.
(H)
(F)
(H)
This was until now her strongest emotional outburst.
Nothing I saw compares with this.
For a moment there was pure grief.
Deeper and more severe pain than any of my little teasings could ever cause.
(F)
(H)
Nothing good looking at the result.
(F)
(H)
This revelation is shocking.
I could imagine that conflicts between insects could become cruel and show terrible results, but I don't even want to imagine this happening in the nursery.
However, thanks to the pheromones I do just this.
(H)
All this sorrow is basically oozing out of her.
Just from inhaling the pheromones, I become sad and my eyes fill with tears.
(F)
(H)
And impotent she's even now.
Barely bottled up anger.
Pain she lived so long with that it became a part of her.
And even today she has simply no other place to go and has to bear with it.
With this background, it is already understandable why she became as she is.
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However,
(F)
(H)
I give her a sad smile.
It hurts to think about this, but as affected as I already am by the pheromones this is the perfect mood to talk about it.
(F)
(H)
(F)
She's contemplating.
She is still staring at me, but I feel that she's deeply in thought.
(H)
(F)
(H)
(F)
(H)
For once I don't mind the little mental nudge.
I was already prepared to proceed and it helps not to get caught up in my mood and break down.
And I know that this memory is capable to cause just that.
As often I already went through it in my mind.
Always and always blaming myself.
(F)
(H)
(F)
My mood darkens.
I know too well how this trail of thought can affect me.
The many times when Rowen had to wake me up from my nightmares.
It got better since I reunited with my daughter.
Something that still feels like a goddamn miracle.
But nonetheless, it hurts.
(F)
She'd only be sad.
Maybe feel betrayed, or simply uncomfortable in my presence.
In any case, it won't help a bit to press this.
(H)
(F)
(H)
(F)
(H)
(F)
She stared the whole time at me.
I feel how she's still irritated.
But I believe my words had an effect on her.
At least she was very much into my story.
And since I know that I now have her attention I shove distinctly her plate with the meal a bit closer towards her.
(F)
If I can understand one thing, then that she feels motherly love.
And I know that this might be enough to press her to take action.
She might be hurt, lazy, and indifferent, but she cares.
That I'm sure about.
And this is proven when she takes a mushroom and eats it.
(H)
(F)
(H)
And thus, since a for me unknowable long time, Honiu eats by herself.
And eventually, she can finish her meal.
And then once more looks at me.
(H)
Wow! I'm actually a bit touched.
Not directly because of what she said but because I know what she felt while saying it.
And this took really some conscious effort on her side.
So it must mean that in some way she accepts my presence.
And that's kinda touching.
So much so that I will not remind her that she had no choice in the first place.
This job might actually not be so bad.
"Plop"
Wha-?
(H)
Okay, okay. You've already seen Kyska doing this.
Actually, they said it's allowed that I receive help here.
As fast as I can I leave the room and walk to Chitu, who is still in attendance.
(F)
Far faster and more directed than I could move Chitu rushes off while sending out a pheromone assembly signal, which I didn't know yet was possible to produce.
Could I replicate this?
Anyway, it works.
Quickly the nurses gather and I go back into the room.
There I see that already five eggs have gathered below Honiu.
Sadly I don't know what I shall do in this situation.
(H)
Did she read my mind? Well, my pheromones?
Honiu points at a wall and I notice there's an earthen seat with a hole in the middle.
It was a bit hard to notice, as this place isn't as well lit as Erys' district.
She seems to have trouble walking.
"Plop"
And the emerging eggs don't help.
At least I can guide her by her arm there.
She takes place and the moment she settles her weight on it another egg comes.
"Plop"
Just in time, I manage to catch it.
It's firm, but also disturbingly soft and wet.
I really worry that I could accidentally damage it.
Which could be partly due to pheromones.
Fortunately, the other nurses finally arrive.
Some split to take care of those strewn on the ground and the others gather at the throne.
They start to bring them over to some workers waiting outside.
Before I can manage to do the same Chitu comes close and extends her claws expectant towards my held egg.
(F)
(C)
Wait!
Counting?
Nobody said something about this!
Okay, five on the ground, already four while she's sitting on the throne.
This makes nine.
"Plop"
Ten.
I proceed to help.
Apparently, it's also part of my duties that I help to extract the eggs and give them to the next nurse.
Touching Honiu's ovipositor leaves me a bit troubled, but I tell myself that a midwife has to do almost the same and it's not embarrassing.
Yet I still can't completely shake off this weird feeling when I take the eggs out there.
I'm at forty-eight eggs when it finally subsides.
The other nurses are directly gone again.
(H)
(F)
(H)
(F)
(H)
(F)
(H)
(F)
(H)
(F)
(H)
(F)
(H)
(F)
With this, an extremely uncommon day comes to an end.
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