Something tapped my foot twice, and my eyes snapped open from a dead sleep. For a brief moment, I thought I was back with my father, training in the field behind our house, sleeping in the small copse of trees. Mom would try and sneak up on whoever was keeping watch, and they would try and wake the other from sleep and prepare for the ambush. Father always tapped my foot to signal that I needed to awaken. It was rare that we managed to surprise mother, and I’m pretty sure she let us win a few of our games just to keep our spirits up.

The fog cleared when a second tap came from Snowy’s foot. Keeping my movements slow and controlled, I reached out for the cocked and loaded crossbow that I left resting nearby. When my hand was on the handle, I focused on trying to hear whatever had alerted Snowy. Coming from up the hill, away from the road, was the sound of multiple creatures moving through the brush. Whatever they were, they were not subtle or silent in the slightest.

Then the scent of goblins wafted through on the breeze, and I almost rolled my eyes in annoyance. I knew better, but it was hard to take a pack of goblins seriously. Not that they couldn’t kill a lone or a pair of travelers - they could - it was just that with even a bit of training, they were easy enough to handle. Short, no taller than an average man’s waist, green and scrawny, they resembled a particularly ugly child. Feral and working in packs, they attacked nearly anything they could get their hands on, beat on it until it died, and then swarmed and ate it. The strategy worked well if you let them breed and build up, but a single hunting group consisted of three to five and were easy to handle.

Their primary advantage in the forest was the ability to see in near darkness. Which was the only reason I didn’t stand, remaining on the ground as I prepared to kill the ugly bastards.

We only had to wait for another few seconds before one of the goblins decided that they were close enough, and it was time to attack. Abandoning his pathetic version of stealth, the monster screamed a high pitched war cry. It charged only to eat my crossbow bolt directly in his thin chest. I had plenty of time to throw off my blanket, line up my shot, and kill the green monster. If I had left the bolts closer to where I was sleeping, I might have reloaded the crossbow and fired again. These were not the best hunters of even the goblin tribes. Likely this was why they were searching near the road, scavenging the refuse of merchants and ambushing lone travelers.

Two more goblins charged in the wake of their downed partner as blood gurgled in his lungs, and he clutched feebly at the bolt that bloomed from his naked chest. I was surprised to see another three charging from the side and approaching Snowy. I wasn’t particularly worried, but it was odd to see six in a hunting group.

My confidence was almost my undoing. I broke one of the cardinal rules of using a new skill, and it was only a lucky dodge that kept a crude dagger from stabbing into my groin. During the entire approach of the goblin, I prepared to use my [Meditation] skill instead of unsheathing my sword and defending. I wanted to slip into that world of silent focus and sluggish movements. With practice, that skill would allow me to develop my skills in ways like nothing else. I was so convinced that I could use the skill and that I was in no danger, that when I failed to activate the skill, I was caught flat-footed with what I am sure was a stupid look of surprise on my face.

The jolt of adrenaline from almost becoming a eunuch was the missing ingredient that allowed the odd floating sensation of [Meditation] to wash over me. Even with the small beast so close, I seemed to have all the time in the world to pull my sheathed knife and slide the blade along the inner wrist of the creature that nearly stabbed me. I took care to keep my movements slow and graceful, spending most of my time in the odd slowed world to line up each blow instead of trying to drive my body to move faster than it could handle.

The moment I felt the tip of the blade pull from the green flesh, I turned my wrist and drove the blade across the creature’s neck. This was proof that even with the seemingly infinite time to consider, I still needed more when the spurt of blood squirted from the wound and directly onto my clothing and face. Resisting the urge to gag from the fetid discharge, I stepped around my falling prey and struck out at my next attacker.

It took two simple slices to kill the final unarmed goblin. I idly noticed that this one was female as I turned to assist Snowy.

These three were attacking Snowy with crude spears, trying to harry her from three sides while she moved her blade in a swirl of metal blocking their attacks. Lining up on one of the goblins, I flipped my knife into the air. Catching the blade in mid-air, as the weapon seemed to float in front of me like a log on a gentle river, I cocked my arm back slightly and let fly…and utterly missed.

My weapon flew in a nearly straight line, it arced over the left-most goblin’s head. Judging my strength and speed in this strange, slowed world would take many hours. I had relied on my muscle memory and practice, but it was hopelessly wrong, given my altered state. So began one of the oddest fights I had ever experienced. I walked forward, slowly plodding along, my legs seeming to stomp exaggeratedly, as I approached the foot of my bedroll and my sword. While I nearly crawled in place, Snowy riposted a jab from one goblin and drove the tip of her sword through another’s eye socket.

Reaching down as I moved forward, I snagged the strap of the sword sheath and tugged to launch it into an upward arc. Snagging the blade’s handle, nearly fumbling it with the odd movements, I thumbed off the loop of leather holding the blade in place. Two more steps brought me close to the fight, while Snowy ended both goblins through brute force and clever swordsmanship. Slicing through the thin branch of one spear, Snowy slapped away the other goblin’s thrust and then struck out at the other goblin. Striking the short green brute across the temple with the flat of her blade, she twisted her wrist and stabbed forward into the other. The goblin she struck across the skull crumpled at her feet, and she casually stabbed through its chest while it lay unconscious.

At the end of the threat, I suddenly found myself returning to the sped-up world that I was used to and cursing my idiotic attempt to use a skill I had only just gained. I knew better, but that difference between the world of [Meditation] and the ordinary world was so stark that I had been enticed to ignore my common sense.

“You missed Josh,” Snowy said with a playful smile to take the sting out of it.

I shrugged as I moved past her to beat the bushes and look for my knife.

“Never got [Throwing] or [Knife Throwing]. I tried, but it never gelled for me,” I said while I hunched over and pushed bushes out of the way.

Snowy said something behind me while searching the goblins, but I missed it, given the distance between us and the sound of my blood pounding in my ears as I was hunched over.

“What?” I asked after I finally found my knife and cleaned it to put it away.

“Hmm? Oh, I said with aim like that, I wouldn’t be throwing my only weapon at hand while an enemy was attacking.”

I nodded at that, then tried to work out how to explain my mistake without making it clear that my idiocy was even worse than just being bad at throwing - skill or no skill. Snowy was quickly done searching the goblins, being armed with crude weapons of stone, and only wearing loincloths made it a quick affair. Looking around at the sky, I tried to work out the time and figured it was some time in the early morning before dawn. We had maybe a few more hours before when we planned to wake, but my inability to activate my skill would be plaguing my mind and wouldn’t let me go back to sleep.

“Hey, if you want to catch a couple of hours before we head out, you can. I need to work through the fight and why my skill didn’t work,” I said, hoping that she would ignore the obvious question.

“I thought you were using your skill?” she asked, my offer ignored in favor of the obvious question.

I shrugged again before I could halt the motion. Mother had often berated me for the movement, which gave away my embarrassment. Also because she said I was too much of a ‘non-verbal communicator’ when I did that. Good for acting, bad for interpersonal interactions. That was one reason I preferred my skill training. Nice and simple. Do the work, gain the skill. But then, that was partly why I was feeling lonely. I was hiding away too often, this kind of thing was why, and if I didn’t break the habit, it would only become more ingrained.

Sighing, I squeezed my eyes shut before turning around to face Snowy again, letting the fake smile fade from my face.

“I couldn’t activate my new skill when I was attacked. The goblin almost gutted me. Then I was able to use it, but when I threw my knife, everything felt odd. I’m going to have to work hard to figure this skill out,” I said while trying to keep the wincing off my face. I didn’t like to admit failure or lack of ability, and I was sure that Snowy could see how uncomfortable I was.

Grabbing her pack, Snowy looked away from me as she started to pack her bag. Without looking at me she said, “Well, we could try and figure it out while we hike. It’s going to be boring enough, moving through the brush here. I figure it’s going to take another day if we stay on the forest trails to reach the farms. We don’t want to be on the road in case they come back.”

Even looking away from me, I could feel my face going red. I hated to feel incompetent, despite being obvious that I wouldn’t know the intricacies of a new skill the moment I gained it. Not having Snowy sneering at me, made it easier to deal with the feeling. I even understood why I felt the way I did. It was hard not to feel incompetent when you were trained by some of the best in the kingdom and failed to match their abilities. Not that father expected me to be able to handle twenty weapons at a master level as he could, but it had been hard to convince the younger me of that. It was worse with mother; she wasn’t able to explain all that she could do. Her talents were a combination of skills and natural ability.

Our camp fell into silence as we packed our bags and prepared to continue the hike in the forest. This time I didn’t plan to carry the crossbow cocked and ready as I had the day before. It was easy enough to keep from accidentally firing the crossbow while on the flat road. Still, with the forest’s root and brush-covered paths, it was a recipe for disaster. Accidentally shooting Snowy would only cement my incompetence.

Almost half an hour of silent hiking passed before Snowy surprised me by stomping her foot and turning to face me.

“What did I do?” Snowy asked with a hurt look.

I remained frozen for a moment with a confused look on my face before Snowy grumbled and turned back to continue along the trail in a stomp. After a few steps, without me following, she kicked a bush and turned back to face me.

“Well?”

Scratching my head, I stared at the obviously upset woman and tried to figure out what she was mad about.

“Um, I’m sorry I couldn’t kill more of the goblins? I didn’t mean to screw up, but I just don’t know how [Meditation] works yet,” I said, hoping that was why she was angry. I felt like a small child apologizing over a mistake. For a brief moment, I no longer felt like a man who had completed his apprenticeship, nor like the failing apprentice that I often had to pretend to be. It was something about trying to become friends with the young woman, letting her past my guard and behind my mask, that left me vulnerable.

Snowy looked at me with a pitying look, her face telling me clearly that I did not understand what I had done wrong. Just as clearly, it said she was not willing to explain it either.

Shaking her head, she smiled at me as she said, “Mother said that men can be idiots over the silliest things at times.”

This seemed to be the end of the discussion since the air of anger and embarrassment was suddenly gone, and the hike continued.