The green, flickering darkness was hard to find. But Threadbare and Graves and Tane had plenty of practice dealing with dungeons. They left the Mousewife outside to mind the children, and walked into the space between worlds.

Black there, blacker than the void, with green shimmering pillars holding people and things, and flickering green letters and numbers scrolling by overhead.

This was the core chamber, the reality behind the dungeon. This was where the Rumpus Room was designed and reconfigured and controlled.

And there in the central pillar of green light, sitting on the oddly-solid ground and holding her face, was Mrs. Beemer.

Threadbare looked around, at the pile of items they kept in here to rearrange the testing grounds. She'd shoved mannequins and living supplies into empty monster slots, and tucked Reason into one of the boss pillars. Reason raised her hands apologetically and waved at the tiny bear. Stuck, Threadbare knew, until the master willed Reason to be free.

“Please empty the pillars once they're open,” Threadbare said. “Tane, could you enter the master pillar when she leaves it?”

“Me? I... I'm not trained in this.”

“Graves?”

“I'll do it, then.” Graves patted Tane on the shoulder. “I've been studying these for years. I should be able to keep things safe and under control.”

Threadbare sat down in front of the master pillar. “Mrs. Beemer? Please come out. We're done here, I'm afraid.”

She didn't stir at first. But slowly she looked up, eyes puffy and tears streaking her face, spectacles nowhere to be seen. She stepped forward, eyes not meeting his, and the second she was gone Graves slid into the pillar behind her.

“I... why did you step down? Why did you leave us?” Mrs. Beemer whispered. “So long as you were in charge, we were safe.”

“I wasn't in charge,” Threadbare said. “I was one of many councilors—”

“But you were the central one! All of this is because of what you did, what you chose. You're the one who found us the way forward, the one who defeated the old king.”

“Celia did that. I only helped her.”

“She would be nothing without you! She would be dead! And she's... she can't protect us,” her face sagged, the brief flash of anger melting it like wax, back into sorrow. “The things they're saying. The things they keep saying about us, keep accusing us of doing... we're not... but... we can't... they keep lying, and...”

Threadbare's anger was fading. He had tried to carry it up to this point, but now that he was here, his pity was greater than his rage.

So instead he said nothing and hugged her.

If she had been wounded, he would have healed her with that hug. But she was untouched, had suffered no hurt save for the one he couldn't heal.

“Edith,” Tane said, finally, his voice raw. “Come on. It's over. We'll get you out of here. You can rest and we'll sort this out. It's over.”

“You should have been our king,” Mrs. Beemer whispered into Threadbare's ear, as she hugged him back. “We wouldn't have minded if you ruled us forever.”

Threadbare felt a pain that had nothing to do with his torn stitches and stretched stuffing, a pain that hit him in his soul. “That is why I had to go,” he whispered back to her.

And it wasn't the only reason, but it was one of the big ones, and she was sobbing too hard to hear the other reasons anyway.

Meanwhile, behind his back, the biggest Reason in the room clanked out of her pillar. “I am sorry,” she said. “Mrs. Beemer said it was an emergency. I tried to let you know I was okay.”

Reason's voice was a muted, slightly hissing bellow of steam and gears. Designing her voicebox had been tricky, since it had to be loud enough to be heard over the sound of her boiler. But still, some of the chagrin and hurt came through.

“That was what the thumbs up was about,” Threadbare said, solving that particular mystery. “Well. Nevermind. Tane, please take her out of here. Graves, please rearrange things so that she can have a comfy room. Reason, do you remember how the configuration was before you... were transferred?”

“I don't,” said Reason, whose jobs were mostly about combat and fighting. “I'll have to go and fetch the instruction books again.”

“We'll wait,” said Threadbare.

Eventually, after Reason went and found the huge-sized manual that the facility staff had prepared for her to read, she was confident enough to swap places with Graves and take over the master pillar.

Graves, when he got out, was not happy.

“This is going to have to go up to the Council. I'll have to raise it directly. It would be bad enough if we'd managed to solve it without fatalities, but we have a dead Doll Haunter... permanently dead, mind you.” he sighed.

“If I had been thinking, I would have cast a Soulstone when Daffodil was destroyed,” said Threadbare. “But it was over too quickly.”

“Don't blame yourself. I told him I had a pair of soulstones in my pocket, and to hop over if things went poorly. But I checked them while I was in the master pillar, and they're empty. Damned if I know why,” Graves sighed again. “He went through the operation once. He should have remembered to go for them. But then, death is disorienting at the best of times.”

“That doesn't make it any better,” Threadbare said, pulling off his top hat, and realizing that he was still a bit torn up. “Mend.”

The popped stitches sealed, and his stuffing healed, but the pain in his heart didn't go away.

They had won, true, and saved almost everyone, but this had been one of those times where almost wasn't good enough.

“Give me a little time,” Threadbare said, making a decision that eased the pain a bit. “I need to break it to... her.”

“Celia? I was going to ask you how she's been, lately.”

“Not well,” Threadbare said simply.

And those two words left volumes unsaid in the silence that followed.

**********

It was a crappy tavern, the sort of roadside inn that catered to bandits, rangers, and very lost halvens on the occasional road trip that focused around disposing of stolen jewelry or annoying dragons or something of that sort.

The innkeeper paused mid-swipe in his neverending quest to stir his spit around every unused mug behind the bar, and glanced upwards as the stairs creaked. Heavy brows furrowed, and he got his club, lovingly carved with the name “Ed Nocker,” out from its holster.

“Ain't nobody got nothing worth stealing so get back down 'ere Rondo and stop yer.... sneaking...” and his voice trailed off as wooden feet clacked down the stairs.

“Er...” he said, staring at the somewhat familiar wooden man that was adjusting his jacket and grinning at him with whitened birch teeth.

It was the smile that did it. “Ah! Hello sir. Didn't expect to see yer back again. I ah, yer room's been rented out,” the innkeeper stammered. “But I could find yer another if ya want. Same price. So... yer a doll haunter now?”

“Gaslight,” said the wooden man.

“Wot?”

“I've always been a doll haunter,” the wooden man said. “Don't you remember?”

And the innkeeper did.

Memories of this man's weathered, fleshy face faded, and in every memory the innkeeper tried to dredge up, he couldn't remember a time when the man hadn't been a jointed wooden mannequin.

“Ah. Right you are then, sorry,” the innkeeper said. “Shall you have your usual supper? Pale ale too, right?”

For a second his mind warred with the image of a wooden man consuming a rack of lamb and a cheap beer, before he told himself he was being silly. Doll haunters didn't eat or drink! Mostly, anyway.

“No need,” the wooden man told him, as he sat in the corner, and pulled one of the complimentary hooded cloaks that the innkeeper left out for old men with maps who enjoyed getting new adventurers killed. “I'm meeting someone. Won't be long, I think.”

Mollified, the innkeeper went back to his spitshining.

A few hours later, a young woman slunk through the door, cast her eyes around the room, and gave the innkeeper a hard look before heading toward the corner.

The innkeeper moved down the bar a bit, as they started whispering, and managed to get into position to hear her say “It's in the cart. I don't think they noticed it's missing. What are you going to do with it now?”

Then a wooden head turned, and glass eyes gleamed out at him from under the hood. The innkeeper froze, then shrugged, keeping his face blank. “You want sumpin?” he asked, sounding nowhere near as nonchalant as he'd intended it to be.

The wooden man scowled, the joints of his face rearranging itself. “They Say... you're a bad bartender. They Say... they're coming to get you. They Say... if you're here when they get here, you're a dead man.”

The innkeeper dropped the mug he was polishing, and fled for his life.

THEY were after him, after all! And oh, oh, oh the things THEY were saying!

After he had gone so fast that dust puffed up on the road outside in great billowing clouds, the young woman whistled.

“That was mean.”

“So are the rooms he lets here. They're more like bedbug feeding pens,” said Daffodil Copperfield. “Ah... listen. That final payment I promised you? It's going to have to wait. I lost my money when I died.”

“That was a slick trick, by the way,” she said, studying him with a smile. “Must have been a hell of an illusion to fool both Graves and Threadbare.”

“Illusion,” Daffodil sighed. “Yeah. Sure.”

“What?”

“Nothing. Just... ah, call it a token regret,” his smile was crooked, but there was a hint of pain in those glass eyes. “Desperate measures. No worries.”

“But you don't have my payment?”

“I do, but not here. You're going to have to come with me if you want the rest of what I owe you.” He stood and stretched out a hand, the sorrow on his face vanishing. “What do you say?”

She stood, taking his hand as she considered, then nodded. “Nothing to lose here, now,” she decided. “So where are we going?”

“East. And that's all you need to know, for now.”

“Still so suspicious,” she said, leading him out to the wagon she'd commandeered, and snapping the whip over the horses' heads. “I told my co-workers I needed to go home and recover, after that mess with Mrs. Beemer. They won't miss me for weeks.”

“You? No. But this is a different story,” said Daffodil as he checked under the straw in the back of the cart.

“I rather think they'll miss this guy,” he said and covered the mercury golem back up as they rode off with the setting sun at their back.

THREADBARE'S CHARACTER SHEET

Age: 8

Guild: Reclaimers Association of Generica

Jobs:

Greater Toy Golem Level 20

Cave Bear Level 14

Ruler Level 22

Tailor Level 12

Model Level 19

Necromancer Level 13

Duelist Level 15

Animator Level 19

Enchanter Level 18

Golemist Level 30

Scout Level 11

Smith Level 14

Sculptor Level 14

Jobs stored in Guild Registry

Shaman 7

Attributes Pools Defenses

Strength: 174 Constitution: 184 Hit Points: 548 Armor: 68

Intelligence: 367 Wisdom: 294 Sanity: 851 Mental Fortitude: 58

Dexterity: 238 Agility: 206 Stamina: 634 Endurance: 78

Charisma: 191 Willpower:353 Moxie: 734 Cool: 26 (41)

Perception: 180 Luck: 134 Fortune: 504 Fate: 30

Generic Skills

Brawling - Level 68 (+15)

Climb - Level 20

Clubs and Maces - Level 23

Dagger - Level 15

Dodge - Level 32

Fishing - Level 1

Magic Items - Resist Fire

Ride - Level 17

Stealth - Level 33

Swim - Level 5

Greater Toy Golem Skills

Adorable - Level 91

Bodyguard - Level 19

Gift of Sapience - Level NA

Golem Body - Level 56

Innocent Embrace - Level 23

Magic Resistance - Level 20

Cave Bear Skills

Animalistic Interface - NA

Claw Swipes - 58

Darkspawn - NA

Forage - 21

Growl - 2

Hibernate - 37

Scents and Sensibility - 25

Stubborn - 13

Toughness - 25

Ruler Skills

Appoint Official - Level NA

Complex Decree – Level NA

Emboldening Speech - Level 25

Identify Subject - Level 62

It’s Good to be King - NA

King’s Quest - Level 28

Kingsguard - Level 10

Noblesse Oblige - Level 78

Organize Minions - Level NA

Proclaim Treaty - Level NA

Royal Audience - Level 25

Royal Quest – Level NA

Simple Decree - Level 22

Swear Fealty - Level NA

Tailor Skills

Adjust Outfit - Level 6

Clean and Press - Level 31

Recycle Cloth - Level 7

Tailoring - Level 57

Model Skills

Adjust Weight - Level 21

Call Outfit - Level 26

Dietary Restriction - Level 95 (+190 to all pools)

Fascination - Level 16

Flex - Level 27

Flexible Pose - Level 5

Makeup - Level 12

Scornful Laugh – Level 1

Self-Esteem - Level 27

Sexy Pose - Level 2

Strong Pose - Level 19

Work it Baby - Level 80 (+80% to raw item bonuses)

Necromancer Skills

Assess Corpse - Level 12

Command the Dead - Level 28

Deathsight - Level 9

Drain Life - Level 8

Invite Undead - Level 19

Mana Focus - Level NA (+13% to sanity)

Skeletons - Level 20

Soulstone - Level 47

Speak With Dead - Level 28

Zombies - Level 3

Duelist Skills

Challenge - Level 15

Dazzling Entrance - Level 18

Disarm - Level 3

Fancy Flourish - Level 16

Guard Stance - Level 24

Offensive Stance – Level 4

Parry - Level 27

Pommel Strike – Level 1

Riposte - Level 2

Swashbuckler’s Spirit - NA (+15 to cool)

Swinger - Level 8

Weapon Specialist - Level 50 (Brawling +25)

Animator Skills

Animus - Level 60

Animus Blade - Level 20

Animus Shield - Level 6

Arm Creation - Level 14

Command Animus - Level 42

Creator’s Guardians - Level 80

Deanimate - Level 6

Distant Animus - Level 4

Dollseye - Level 25

Eye for Detail - Level 21

Magic Mouth - Level 18

Mend - Level 74

Enchanter Skills

Appraise - Level 36

Boost+5 - Level 25

Boost +10 - Level 5

Disenchant - Level 24

Elemental Protection - Level 18

Glowgleam - Level 26

Harden - Level 36

Soften - Level 31

Spell Protection – Level 2

Spellstore I - Level 40

Spellstore V - Level 18

Spellstore X - Level 8

Spellstore XV – Level 1

Wards - Level 3

Golemist Skills

Armor Golem - Level 7

Bone Golem - Level 2

Call Golem - Level 12

Clay Golem - Level 13

Command Golem - Level 33

Flesh Golem - Level 1

Golem Animus - Level 70

Golem Guardians - NA

Greater Golem Upgrade - Level 36

Invite Golem - Level 21

Mend Golem - Level 72

Mercury Golem – Level 2

Program Golem - Level 47

Toy Golem - Level 101

Wood Golem - Level 22

Scout Skills

Alertness - Level 3

Best Route - Level 3

Camouflage - Level 17

Firestarter - Level 12

Keen Eye - Level 13

Sturdy Back - Level 13

Wind's Whisper - Level 26

Smith Skills

Adjust Arms and Armor - Level 20

Refine Ore - Level 15

Smelt Down - Level 7

Smithing - Level 52

Sculptor Skills

Detect Clay - Level 8

Mend Ceramic - Level 6

Refine Clay - Level 18

Sculpting - Level 61

Equipment

Golden Laurels (Enables the REST skill, usable every two hours.)

Inventory

Quests

Unlocked Jobs

Air Elementalist, Berserker, Burglar, Cleric, Cook, Cultist, Grifter, Merchant, Spirit Medium, Tamer, Wizard