《Necrotourists》Holy City Arc - 6: Precious toilet paper
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My mind hadn’t felt this relax since a thousand years ago. I stretched my bony body as I put on my clothes once more. I got out of the large bathroom and complimented the monks on their hot spring.
“Hot spring? The bath springs of Aon are known to be really cold...why is there steam coming out of the bathroom you just got out of?”
My companions and I ignored the ramblings of the priests as we left to tour more around. It had been a few days since we left the stronghold, but we’ve already felt like it’s been a year.
Although our bodies didn’t tire, we still enjoyed the mortal pleasures of enjoying a comfy bed and lying around, not doing anything for awhile, every so and often.
“Should we enjoy some fresh beds in a tavern?” I asked my companions. The group agreed in unison so we decided to head to the market district of Aon.
Although not as busy as the Great Cathedral, the market district still boasted a great number of people. As the types of shops varied, from simple food shops to blacksmiths, so did the quality of the goods. We passed by a small general shop and found some interesting things we did not have a many years ago.
“What is this? This...thing?” I asked the shopkeeper as I tinkered with a metal tube.
“Never seen a tinderbox before? That sounds very strange. You can take out tinder. Rub the tinder against the flint and it’ll catch fire.”
“That sounds very convenient for long travels especially if you want to pack light and don’t know how to use magic…You probably sell a lot of these!” I commented as I shake the box.
“Well...indeed, as most households here that are well-off buy them, after all.” The shopkeeper thought I was weird. I bought a few other trinkets with the coins I have with me.
As we left the general shops, one of my companions approached me.
“Boss, this is bad. I’ve lost my dagger somewhere,” He dejectedly told me as he rubbed his temples trying to remember where he lost them.
“Perhaps you lost it in the Great Cathedral, should we head back?” I suggested.
“Sigh, but the Great Cathedral is huge. Maybe we could just look for it tomorrow…” He sighed.
“Well, Boss. This could be a great chance to look at the blacksmiths so we could get this guy a temporary dagger,” Sarjay suggested. The group agreed and we started browsing around the shops. This should be good time to also gather information about the world’s current state of technology in metallurgy.
My group and I entered a shop that was less crowded than the other shops. Weapons and armor was just scattered among the shelves and barrels with no clear organization. There was a few customers browsing the equipment, some looking very ragtag as if they just went through a battle.
I picked up one of the swords lying down on a barrel and examined it. The hilt was decently made and the sword, though not sharp, was good enough for use in combat. I swung the sword around, its balance was not that bad. However, it seemed disappointing compared to the standards a thousand years ago. I’m beginning to think Fatebinder was the ceiling of the standards of the world…
As I wasn't exactly an expert in weapons or armor, I consulted Sarjay, “What do you think about the equipment you’ve seen so far?”
“In this shop?” Sarjay asked.
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“No, from everything so far. From the armor the guards were wearing, to the travellers, to the gear the merchants sells…” I elaborated.
“To be honest, it’s far worse than a thousand years ago. Do you think technology stagnated? Perhaps it’s just this region, Boss. Don’t be too pessimistic.” Sarjay patted my skeletal back.
That was what I feared the most. What if nothing changed or everything got worse? The living standards got stuck for a thousand years was what happened? There was also the probability that something catastrophic happened while we were in the stronghold which caused the stagnation. Such as a Demon God waking and wrecking everything it saw until it got its neck snapped by one of the Gods that got woken because the Demon God was making too much noise. Instead of answers, the only thing I got so far were more questions.
I sighed as I put the sword back into the barrel. My companion who lost his dagger was unsatisfied with the weapons here so we started searching for the best blacksmith in the city.
“Best blacksmith? I heard she charges a lot, do you have that much money, pilgrim? Well, you do look like you have some kind of wealth judging by your bodyguards, she’s just by the Noble District. You know, the gate connecting the Noble District and the Market District. Just look for the sign with a shield and a dragon on it,” A guard told us. We thanked him and went on our way.
As we approach the Noble District, the shops become more elaborately decorated and the shoppers appeared to be more affluent.
We soon noticed a large, dull gray building. We knocked on the front door and waited for a while before the door opened. A little girl was at the door and she looked slightly frustrated. Her short scarlet hair that was tied with a bandana around her hair was dirtied with something black, presumably oil, as well as her brown apron. She was around my waist level and judging by her skin, though young, she had worked for some time now.
“What do you guys want? I’m busy right now,” She barked at us. She eyed at us from top to bottom, analyzing our intentions. “For the last time, I’ve already donated to the church but I’m not converting.”

“Hold on, we’re not here to preach or something. We’re here to find good weapons and armor. We have money to pay, I think,” I explained.
“Is that so? Then come in and browse, I’ll just be at my forge. My shop specializes in taking in requests that’s why my door wasn’t open.”
We entered the building and saw a typical shop with a large door going to a forge. There were tables lined with high quality weapons and armor on display cases at the front of the shop. There were some various armors on stands with intricate poses. Beyond the door was a workshop containing a large forge and tools.
The little girl went to her forge and started smithing as we browse through her displays. I picked up a sword from a case and examined it. Compared to the old sword, this weapon was very sharp, well-balanced and it was overall sturdy. I could also feel a hint of enchantment, giving the sword a magical property. It was also blessed by some kind force that I’m not familiar with.
“This sword...other than magical enchantment, what did you do with it?” I asked the little girl by the forge.
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“I see you noticed the enchantments I put on it. I put a lot of effort in the runes placed in that sword,” She said as she dumped a hot unfinished sword onto a barrel of water. Steam rose from it and invaded the room slightly. “But what do you mean that I did something with it?”
“Well, I feel like this sword is somehow connected to a greater plane, for lack of words to better describe it,” I explained.
“What? What do you mean by that? How can you tell it’s also enhanced with spirit magic? That’s impossible without doing a ritual! What did you do to it?” She angrily approached me.
“Nothing. I just touched it.”
“Stop lying! Nobody can touch it and just somehow feel spirit enhancement!” She continued. “In fact, from the start, I thought all your equipment were strange!”
“What do you mean strange?” Sarjay came by holding a mace. He was casually using it to massage his arms.
“I’ve been working with metal for years and I’ve been called one of the top metallurgist in the continent but I simply can’t tell what metal your armors are made from. I dismissed it at first because I thought I was tired and couldn’t remember but looking closely now, I really can’t tell! Spit it out, who are you people? Answer quickly before I call the guards!” She shouted at us.
“Ah, well, young girl..” Sarjay was about to answer before I dragged him to me.
“Hold on, Sarjay. We are over a thousand years old. We’re experienced contact with all sorts of races. What if she’s just a halfling?” I whispered to him.
“I don’t know, Boss. How does this relate to her screaming that there’s some very suspicious people in her shop?” Sarjay whispered back.
“I don’t know, one wrong move and you could get us killed! We should try to appeal to her for our sake. I’ll handle this,” I answered as I turned towards the girl.
“Oh Great One, please accept this,” I said as I threw a fat sack of coins in front of her.
“Bribery and sweet nothings won’t work on me, you know,” She quickly retorted as she shook her hand.
I turned with teary eyes towards Sarjay as he face palmed. “Alright, look here, young girl. We’ve actually came from a very, very far place. We just wanted to figure out how inferior the equipment of this land compared to ours,” He explained as his slammed his own short sword against the mace he was holding earlier.
Contrary to what she expected, the head of the mace shattered and the short sword remained intact. He brought his sword closer to her face and she noticed his intentions - There was no dent on the short sword.
“But...how? That was made from the best materials I could get my hands on!” She said with wide eyes and shock.
“The key point here is that the best materials you could get your hands on are crap. That’s the truth. We’ve come from a far place and we’re way stronger than the people in this continent. So obviously being able to tell spirit enhancement in a sword is a piece of cake for us.” Sarjay snickered.
Nice lying, Sarjay! I’m so happy I had someone I could count on. To be honest, the short sword Sarjay was using was made from the same material as the metal plated on us.
Heavenium, the metal gifted from the Gods, or whatever nonsense people called it back in the days. It was the strongest and lightest material ever found. There was no record of any heavenium made weapons being broken or dented except for the case when Sarjay’s sword broke from Fatebinder.
Although all my companions have heavenium plated onto their skeletal structure, not everyone had heavenium gear. Only the top lieutenants are equipped with such expensive gear. The good thing was that the dagger my companion lost wasn’t made from it so there was no rush to find it immediately.
“Sigh, what horrible weapons. In compensation for the mace, make us a dagger and a greatsword from this metal. Whatever left-over metal remains, you can keep it,” Sarjay said as he took out a large lump of metal from his bag. He placed it on the table nearest to the girl. He probably intended to have a greatsword made first to replace the sword that got destroyed by Fatebinder decades ago.
“What the...This is mithril! These things are extremely rare!” She commented.
“Eh?” Sarjay was stunned. Well, me too. Back in the days, mithril was pretty much everywhere. I remember there was a kingdom that used mithril as toilet paper because of how soft it was and how it was just growing everywhere.
Yes, grow. Mithril in this world was grown from a type of tree which sucked nutrients and metal from the ground, creating a fruit made of pure mithril. Because of its strong properties, a few thousand years ago, everyone was growing mithril trees everywhere until it became a problem that everyone considered it as a type of invasive tree.
What happened to cause mithril to be so rare? Now that she mentioned it, I couldn’t recall seeing any mithril trees around. Was that why the guards were wearing such horrible equipment? The best equipment I’ve seen so far were steel.
We kept silent as she ran her hand around the lump of metal. “I’ve only felt it once...when the elves of Dorma allowed me to feel mithril in their treasury many years ago...but I still remember it to this day. This is really mithril! In your land, does everyone have mithril? Are those equipment of mithril? I need to know!” Her eyes as red as her hair started sparkling as she jumped me.
“Hold on, too many questions. Many of those we cannot answer. More importantly, can you craft with it?” Sarjay asked.
“No, I can’t. My forge isn’t equipped with such...but I know a place that has a forge that could craft any metal, even mithril,” She explained.
This just piqued my interest greatly. I had a feeling I knew who. A certain race who were short, bearded and very drunk at all times, and were experts at metal.
“The dwarves of Azkator!” She exclaimed.
Very well, the next place we’ll visit would be the dwarves!
“But it’s a bit far...and I don’t think I could just simply pack up and leave. Plus, I need to find some guards to accompany me…” She started muttering to herself.
“Wait. Before you decide anything, we would also like to head towards the dwarven city,” I told her.
“You’re coming with me? That’ll be much better! You could explain to the dwarves how you got these. And perhaps I can know more of your land better.” She was frantically drooling already.
“When will you head out?” I asked her. We just came to Aon, but Sarjay kept insisting we should leave soon. However, there were still a few more spots I would like to see.
Although the city was big, being undead, we didn’t get tired, so we spent the majority of the time travelling from one spot to another touring non-stop, but there was still a lot of places I would like to see. Just two days wasn’t enough to satiate my taste for touring!
“I need time, will two to three weeks work for you? I’ll wait for you guys here. I need to finish my work and write a letter to the Grand Cardinal,” She answered.
“Excellent! We will meet again in four weeks, then!”
“Four weeks? I guess I don’t mind preparing for an extra week. It could also give me more breathing time.” She said, “What’s your name? Since we’ll be travelling, it’ll be good to know your name.”
“Well, my name...” I got interrupted before I finished.
“Hey, Boss. I’d like this dagger. Is that fine?” My dagger-less companion came out to me with a sheathed dagger.
“He’s with you, right? You can keep the dagger as thanks. My name’s Asha of Follis,” She said as she held her hand out.
I shook her hand and the only thought I had was how grateful I was that having glorified toilet papers led us to having another city to explore.
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