Durandal showed me something weird. From his necklace, a bunch of miniature people came out, and then they were eaten by a red monster! I tried to touch them, but they weren’t actually there. He called them a hologram or something like that. Anyways, I’m not sure why he wanted to show me the holograms he created unless it was to remind me of a certain someone who shall not be named because it’s definitely related to her in some way! Durandal’s not smart enough to make things like that. Hmph. What’s he trying to do?

“Boss, I think it’s safe to go back to the tomb.” Mrs. Feathers nudged my leg with her head. “Please, this time, don’t touch things you aren’t supposed to.”

“No one told me I couldn’t touch!” Would I have touched the wall if someone told me I couldn’t? Of course not!

“The barkeep told you on the way here.”

“…No, he didn’t.” Don’t look at me like that, Mrs. Feathers. You’re just a bird! “Ahem. Anyways, is the tomb opening yet?”

“Not quite,” Mrs. Feathers said. “Before we go back, how about we review what the barkeep told us about this place? Since you forgot what he said about touching the tomb before it opens, and he specifically emphasized that point multiple times, I’m curious as to what else you’ve forgotten.”

What did the barkeep tell me about this place? “The Slaughter God’s Tomb is a grave filled with treasures.”

Mrs. Feathers stared at me as if she was expecting more. “And…?”

“And don’t touch the tomb before it opens.”

“And…?”

“What more do you want from me!?” Listening’s hard. Remembering things is even more difficult! How am I expected to do two challenging tasks at once? It’s not fair!

Mrs. Feathers turned her head away and patted Durandal’s leg with her wing. “Hey, Mr. Sword Spirit. How has she not died yet?”

“Are you cursing me? You want me to die that badly, huh?”

“No, no,” Mrs. Feathers said and hopped away from me when I tried to grab her. “I’m just curious. The cultivation technique you practice is very odd. In exchange for strength, you give up your mental capabilities. There’s a few cultivation techniques for training the mind that should be in your possession since you robbed the Rainbow Phoenix Sect’s skill pavilion. Why don’t you test those out?”

Mm? “A cultivation technique to train my mind?” Will that make me smarter? If I became smarter, then I really won’t need Ilya anymore! Gah! I thought her name! Shoo, shoo. Bad thoughts, go away. Think happy thoughts, like a field of acorns and—

The entrails of your fallen enemies!

…Can you not? Maybe these mind techniques will also make these thoughts go away. I’ll try them. “Which one…, don’t tell me, is it a jade slip?”

“I’ve been wondering about that,” Mrs. Feathers said. “Why are you so scared of jade slips?”

“I’m not scared of them! I just don’t like them because they hurt my head.”

Mrs. Feathers tilted her head. “Because someone hit you with one…?”

“No. When she learns, it hurts,” Durandal said.

You don’t have to put it so bluntly!

“Boss, if you practice a cultivation technique for your mind, you’ll get smarter and it won’t hurt anymore when you learn.” Mrs. Feathers pecked at the interspacial ring I took out and a jade slip appeared in her beak. She placed it on the ground, propping it up with my leg. “This is the best one for you. It’s the most basic one there is, but once you practice it a few times, your mind will be strong enough to learn the more advanced ones without pain.”

This … could it be true? “If something sounds too good to be true, then it’s not true!” There’s no way training my mind will make learning less painful! That’s like saying training my body will make it hurt less the next time I train, and I already know that’s not true. When I trained my body, Durandal always increased the training later, so it always hurt the same amount!

“…Why does it feel like she has a lot of hostility towards you?” Mrs. Feathers stared up Durandal. Then she looked at me. “But besides that, Boss, sometimes when something sounds too good to be true, it might really be just that good.”

“Hah…. Mrs. Feathers, in the end, you’re just a bird.” Even smart people can be naïve. “Just stick with me, and no one will ever take advantage of you again.”

“Boss….”

“Yes?” Is she feeling touched? Mm. I don’t take people under my wing often, but when I do, I do it well. Like Softie! …Softie! “Gah! Softie’s in danger! It’s been a whole month and I completely forgot about her! Durandal, this is all your fault!” That’s right. He was always distracting me right when I was about to remember!

“Actually, I’ve been meaning to tell you something for a while now,” Durandal said before I could punch him. “Remember that jade slip I got from the barkeep’s dad?”

Um. “No.”

“It was about a month ago. You threatened to kill me if I put it inside of you.”

This sounds vaguely familiar. “Maybe.”

“Well, on that jade slip, there was information about the Shadow Devil Sect. Softie’s perfectly fine and overcame her obstacles. You don’t have to worry about her dying.”

“Really? Phew.” That’s a relief. Wait a minute…. “You found this out a month ago!? Hold it right there! Get out of your sword, damnit!” It’s no fair that Durandal can run away from me whenever he wants! Grr. Hmph, the next time he comes out, I’ll teach him a lesson! But at least Softie’s safe. I can stop worrying about her and focus on the tasks at hand. …But what was I doing again? Oh, right! The tomb! “Mrs. Feathers, take me back to the tomb!”

“What about the mind cultivation technique?”

“If I ever feel like I’m not smart enough to do something, I’ll consider learning it then.” But that day won’t come! As long as I have a smart person with me, it’s the same thing as me being smart enough to do everything. Mhm.