How I Met Your Monster #43

Cy-ru5

Profile:

Cy-ru5, 21

Cyborg from the Future

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Bio:

I am Cy-ru5. I have come from the future to change some events in the hopes that I can prevent some...stuff that happens. I am stuck here until I can reach a certain nexus point in the space time continuum that will allow me to travel back. In the meantime, I would love to get to know you.

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I have to say, I went in to this one looking to find out any information on the future that I possibly could. I mean, if he was changing things, then it's not really the future anymore, is it? Or like a parallel future? I'm not entirely sure. Time travel is a risky thing to try and figure out. But I figured I would be safe grilling Cy-ru5 about it.

We met up at a local pub and I quickly found him sitting at the back booth. Not only was I able to suss him out due to half of his body being entirely made up of metal, but because he was frantically waving me down as soon I walked through the door. I made my way over to him, where he had already gotten a drink for both of us.

"Thank you for meeting with me, Silas," he said. "I am Cy."

"Nice meeting you, Cy. I'm glad you reached out to me. I never thought I would be able to get to meet up with an android." I knew he was a cyborg, but I wanted to hear the difference. I never understood it before.

"Not an android, actually. A cyborg," he said. "An android is basically an artificial intelligence meant to look human. I was human and have had a lot of parts put into me. My name was actually Cyrus before that happened, I just like the spelling."

"Cy-ru5 the Cyborg. Catchy, though," I said.

He laughed, a mix between a deep guffaw and a robotic chirp. He picked up his beer, toasted me, and sat it back down, "Indeed. Though I will say, being here in the past is difficult."

"How far into the future are you from?" I asked.

"Roughly three hundred years. A lot of crazy stuff ends up happening. Or happened. I believe I have corrected it all," he said.

"Aren't you worried you're going to go back to an even worse shit show?" I asked.

"Of course," he responded, "but that's the rub, isn't it? Sure, there might not be corpses that run around spraying us with acid anymore, but maybe my favorite pizza place is gone. It would suck, but it's worth the risk. And if it doesn't work, we can go back and change stuff again."

"Wait, corpses?" I asked, stunned.

"Oh, yeah. There is all sorts of messed up stuff going on in my time. Those corpses, birds that grew so big they can pick up a sedan and fly away with it. Fire hydrants that spew fire at random. Chocolate stopped existing. Buildings randomly explode. It's insane." He said casually before taking another gulp of his beer.

I sat there slack jawed before speaking, "Sorry. I just thought you wouldn't talk about it. Your profile made it seem like it was a secret."

"I mean, technically it is. Unhinged doesn't want me potentially leaking the future to people. But I've changed it right? You guys won't have to deal with any of that if it worked, you know?"

He had a point. I debated even publishing this blog post, but if the future isn't what he says it is thanks to his efforts, then technically I'm not leaking anything. I drank down my beer a bit and was about to ask him another question when he suddenly jumped up.

"Karaoke night! They just called my name. Be right back," he said, before heading toward the other side of the bar where a small makeshift stage was. On it stood a screen and a projector. Next to them were a speaker and a microphone. I sat and watched in awe as Cy belted out Gloria Gaynor's I Will Survive with all of the enthusiasm in the world. Not because he was so great, but because he was so terrible, I was surprised he wasn't booed off the stage. Instead, the drunk patrons cheered for it.

He got finished with his song and came back, sliding into the booth and finishing off his beer. "You should go up and give it a shot," he said.

"I'm not big into karaoke. Do you do that often?" I asked.

"Hell yeah, man. I'm here every night, especially on karaoke nights," he responded.

I arched an eyebrow, "Don't you have a mission to worry about?"

He laughed, belched, and laughed again. I noticed that the more he drank, the more casual he got. He put up a hand and another beer ended up on our table.

"I'm here every night because the mission is over. They gave me a checklist, said it would take decades to complete, then said to wait for pickup. I got done with their list in two months. It's been five years. The pickup is in another twenty. I have nothing but time to screw around," he said bitterly.

I felt for him. I couldn't imagine having decades of your life planned out and managing to hit it in such a short time span. He hopped back up when there was a lull in karaoke singers and began to sing Big & Rich's Save a Horse, Ride a Cowboy to the delight of everyone in the bar. I watch as he gyrated mechanically, putting his all into his performance.

I felt for him in that moment. As much as he was letting himself stay stuck in his situation, these moments of karaoke night seemed to be what was keeping him together. When he sang, he was free. Sure sounded better than sitting still waiting for your life to pick you back up. He finished up and came back to the table.

"Actually, I think I will give it a shot," I said.

He hopped up and down in his seat, then pointed me toward the DJ. I told them my song, then made my way to the stage. The DJ spoke over the mic, "Ladies and Gentlemen, give it up for a total karaoke noob, SILAS!" he shouted. The nerves shot through me.

The opening chord of Wild Cherry's Play that Funky Music started and I could feel the crowd get behind me. I started soft, but by the chorus, I was fully swept up in the moment. The song ended and the bar cheered for me as I waved at them. I made my way back over to the table, where Cy was grinning ear to ear.

"That was amazing," he said. "I love watching people get into it on their first time."

I was panting, but felt good, "Why do you do this though? Why not go out and find something else?"

He sighed, then looked into his glass. He finished the little left inside, then slammed it down, "I plan on it. I got on this app to meet people, and so far, it's been okay. Until then, I've got karaoke. That's one thing that stayed strong in the future. Sure, microphones sometimes come to life and try to mind control you, but when they don't, karaoke is always there."

"You miss it, don't you?" I asked.

He nodded softly, then looked up at me and smiled, "But until I get to go back, I have this bar. I have old friends and new friends. And I have the music." He held up his hand and two more beers were suddenly at the table.

"I'll drink to that that," I said, toasting his sentiment.

It's not what I expected meeting a cyborg from the future, dear readers, but to be quite fair, very few of these interviews have gone the way I've expected them to. From the very first one with Vexys until now, they've been a wild ride. But then again, I've never really been afraid to go on a wild ride. So, as I like to say. Until next time.

-Silas D.