The world crawled by outside my window, the journey seemingly endless despite the fact we’d only been in the car for an hour, if that. My mind kept flitting towards Crete and Mitch but it didn’t want to stay there.

It was fun and interesting, don’t get me wrong, but it wasn’t appealing to me as much as normal. I think it was because we were just in our room at the resort, learning about diving which was really fascinating and I did want to learn about it but every time I tried, I found myself withdrawing from the dream.

Fear was stopping me. I wasn’t sure what it was about diving that made my heart clench with panic but there was definitely something. It didn’t matter anyway. I could feel the information soaking in anyway which made it harder for me to want to stay there.

Plus, my heart longed for action and excitement, not for sitting around inside. I wanted to be out there doing stuff, running around rather than being trapped.

“How’s it going, kid?” I heard Mitch ask but he sounded far away.

I was only half in the world, dizziness pulling me away gently.

“Good,” I replied faintly.

The next song came on, loud and obnoxious, but I knew my mom was enjoying it. She was tapping the steering wheel as she navigated the twisty roads slowly. Cars were lining up behind us, clearly getting frustrated by her glacial speed, but my mom continued along the road slowly, either unbothered or unaware.

I let out a breath, trying not to get frustrated but the urge to throw the car door open and jump out was almost overwhelming. I just needed something, something to distract myself from the boring monotony.

I stared blankly down at the phone in my hands wanting to text someone, probably Phoebe, but it was too early. I didn’t want to wake her even though I knew she was a morning person. Seven was too early even for her.

But, then what?

I couldn’t just sit in the car and listen to the endless wall of noise streaming far too loudly from the speakers. I had already exhausted all of the apps on my phone, so what was I left with?

“Oh, for God’s sake!” my mom cried as we pulled onto the motorway and traffic stretched on ahead of us endlessly.

The car ground to a stop as it joined the procession, my mom’s fingers already starting to tap incessantly against the steering wheel again.

“Why are there so many cars out at this time? I know it’s the first day of the holidays but this is ridiculous!” she cried. “This is what we get for leaving so late. If we’d left when I wanted to, we would have avoided all of this!”

She revved the engine, as if her annoyance would somehow clear the traffic. It didn’t, of course.

I understood her impatience, I didn’t want to sit in the traffic either but there was nothing we could do about it. Revving or ranting about how it was everyone else’s fault did nothing to help.

I wished it did though. I wished there was a secret path or something we could do to get there faster. As much as I was dreading it a bit, I did want to get to my grandparent’s house. Things were always stressful there but they were also somehow easier.

My mom and I rarely fought when we were there. There were small blips, of course, there always would be but on the whole, it was normally okay. Of course, things would be stressful at first but as soon as my grandparents get bored of being around us and leave to stay in their other house, things would get better. We kind of did things separately most of the time when we were there but we’d have meals together and hang out sometimes. I usually just spent time going for walks, reading, swimming, watching TV, whatever I wanted.

I couldn’t wait.

My head dropped back against the headrest and a soft, wistful sigh slipped out of my mouth as my mom tapped her nails against the steering wheel somehow more relentlessly than before.

I let my eyes flutter shut, not wanting to be in this world but also not wanting to go to Mitch’s which left me with nowhere.

I could go back to him, that wouldn’t be too bad. I could sit in our room and continue to study, watch the videos he’d put on which explained the information better than the textbook and then see what happened after that but… I didn’t want to. I knew that if I told him that I didn’t, he wouldn’t force me to, but he might be disappointed in me. He’d explained how important it was for me to learn and I knew I needed to but I was studying and learning when I wasn’t even there so I didn’t need to sit through it.

I wanted more.

I wanted more excitement. I wished that I could just close my eyes and skip through it all. Learn everything I needed to in the blink of an eye without wasting any time but I couldn’t. I didn’t even want to, not really. It felt wrong. It felt like cheating and I wasn’t even sure if I could do it.

I didn’t need to though. I could leave that fantasy there, ticking away in the background, and come back to it when it was more fun. I didn’t need to stick to just one fantasy. I could go anywhere.

But, where should I go? I wanted more excitement, more entertainment.

I felt the car spinning around me hazily as I let my mind wander, contemplating my next adventure. I could do anything. Do anything and go anywhere.

But, where did I want to go?

The car jolted forwards and I blinked my eyes open, the brightness blinding me for a moment as spots swam in front of my vision.

“This damn traffic!” my mom cried, slamming her fist against the wheel.

My head whipped around to face her.

That wasn’t right. My mom didn’t say things like ‘damn’ unless people could overhear her. She favoured stronger words, ones that would make her tell me off for being unladylike if I were to repeat them.

The window wasn’t open. There was no reason for her to censor herself like that.

I looked around, my eyes scanning my surroundings and landing on the car in front of us.

Was it red before?

Excitement started to creep into my heart as I considered it. I wasn’t sure but I didn’t think it was. I was in a new fantasy, I was almost certain of it. The trees on the other side of the road looked different now. They were greener before but now, they were tinged with reds and oranges, the leaves drying and falling from the branches as the life slowly left them.

The building side on our side of the road looked different too. There had been people working there before but now, it looked empty. The houses they were building seemed frozen in their incomplete state and, I wasn’t sure how I could tell, but something told me they’d been stuck like that for a long time. I couldn’t put my finger on what made me think that, something just seemed wrong.

My skin prickled as a creeping sensation trickled down my spine and that feeling of wrongness intensified.

Movement caught my eyes. Just a flash of something that I could barely see from where we were idling. Confusion washed over me as I stared at the shipping container someone had made into an office at the edge of the building site, not far from our car. I couldn’t quite see into it, just a hint of the red-painted inner walls.

That seemed like a weird decision. Why would anyone go to the effort of painting the inside walls of an office in an abandoned building site? And, from what I could see, the paint was bright and glossy. It looked fresh.

Maybe they were coming back to the site? Starting to work on the houses again soon?

The car crept forwards again ever so slightly and I couldn’t drag my eyes away from the office despite every part of my brain and body screaming at me to look away. From the new angle, I could see further into the office but it didn’t answer any of my questions.

The red paint wasn’t just coating the walls. From what I could see, it covered the floor and ceiling too. The slightly viscous, chunky liquid coated almost every surface in the office.

A shadow crossed the doorway and my chest tightened. There was movement inside and it made my heart race even though I didn’t know what was happening or why I was so scared. Even so, I wanted to scream, to tell my mom to pull onto the hard shoulder and drive as fast as we could away from there, to call the place, or just do anything, but I was frozen. I couldn’t even blink as we pulled further forwards.

I could see into the office now. I could see the discarded piles of bones that had been sucked clean, but it didn’t matter. Whoever or whatever had been in there before stepped out of the door, raising their blood-splattered face to the sky and letting the sky warm their skin.

I could almost feel the relief that the figure exuded as they stood motionless, simply relishing the feel of the sun’s gentle caress but that bubble was popped as their eyes opened and found mine. Their tongue, too long, stained a dark red and forked at the end, snaked out of their mouth and wiped the blood from their face. With the gore gone, I could finally see their features properly.

An involuntary shudder ripped through me.

They looked human but barely. Their face was skeletal yet the skin hung from their bones loosely. Cheekbones jutted out sharply but the flesh dangling from them was baggy. Their eyes, wide and gaping, lit up with excitement and expectation as their lips pulled back into a grotesque grin which showed too much of their pointed, blood-stained teeth.

They slowly lifted one hand to their lips, extending their snakelike tongue to clean the blood off their fingers. Their eyes fluttered shut in ecstasy and, even though I wasn’t close enough to hear it, somehow I knew that they moaned throatily. They had enjoyed their feast.

My pulse danced frantically in my throat as their eyes opened again, still focused on me and the car rolled forwards as traffic started to clear. But it wasn’t enough. We stopped again, still too close to the creature for my breathing to come easily.

Their gaze didn’t leave me as slowly, the monster stepped forwards.

Their steps were clumsy and uncertain, staggering almost. They moved like a newborn deer, as if they weren’t quite used to their body yet, but they quickly gained confidence. Their steps became longer, loping and utterly inhuman as they raced towards me, their hunger palpable.

There was too little distance between the monster and my open window. I hadn’t even realised it was open before, I’d been too enthralled by the monster, but now y m shot out to jab at the window controls frantically and it rose at a leisurely pace. I looked around frantically for the lock on the door but there was nothing.

I was going to die. It was going to reach me and tear the door open before devouring me like it had the bodies in the shipping container.

I glanced away from the approaching monster, staring at the unmoving row of cars in front of us. My mom could pull onto the hard shoulder and speed away but there were cars on it too, not too far in the distance. It would buy us a few seconds, maybe a little more, but it wouldn’t help.

We were going to die.

I squeezed my eyes shut as tightly as I could, fighting back a whimper, painfully aware of how close the monster was to us. I tried desperately, frantically, to escape, clutching at the faint dizziness that brushed my mind but it slipped from my grasp.

I opened my eyes again. We hadn’t moved. That same red car idled in front of us and the monster was still hurtling across the building site towards us. I clenched my eyes shut again, my breath nothing more than sharp gasps.

I couldn’t die. It was just a fantasy, a dream. Nothing more. I couldn’t die in a dream, right?

I was the one in charge, I was in control of my fantasies. I could make the thing disappear if I wanted to.

I forced my eyes open, glancing at the monster in the mirror for just a second, making sure that it wasn’t too close, before making myself take a deep, slow breath. I was in control. With my hands no longer shaking as badly as before, I let my eyes find the monster again and waited for it to disappear.

Nothing happened.

Desperation started to claw at my heart as I tried harder, willing the monster to vanish so hard that it almost hurt. The car in front of us jolted forwards and I let out a small relieved gasp, unable to look away from the monster. We were moving, we might be safe.

Well, not safe. Something told me that the monster, that aswang or vampire or draugr, whatever it was, would hunt me down until it found me. It would never be satisfied until it tasted my blood and felt my heart stop as it feasted on my flesh.

I would never be safe again. That thing was going to find me wherever I went. It was going to find me and murder me and I couldn’t even escape the fantasy. I was going to die for real.

The car rolled to a stop again and a sob of fear escaped my mouth but I pushed my fist against my lips to muffle the noise as a faint scream came from somewhere behind us.

Someone had tried to escape. They’d noticed the monster and decided to take their chances on foot but it had caught them. It stopped, the screaming person held tightly in one hand, its eyes still on me.

“Grace?” a voice that could be my mother’s asked. “Are you alright?”

I couldn’t speak, too scared to even make a noise, as I watched the thing in the mirror. Its face stretched into a taunting smile as it looked at me, enjoying the fear and horror that was coursing through me.

“Grace?” my mom asked again, turning to look at me but I couldn’t look away from the monster.

It seemed amused by my fear but the person in its grasp had finally had enough. They struggled and my mouth opened to shout something but I wasn’t even sure what to say.

It didn’t matter. The monster had grown bored or hungry. It lifted the woman into the air easily, one hand tangling in their hair and pulling her head roughly to the side before it sunk its face into her neck.

Its eyes fluttered shut briefly and her screams finally stopped as it feasted.

Far too soon, it opened its eyes, as if checking I was still watching, before pulling its head back. Sinew and viscera stretched from the body before snapping and spraying even more blood over the monster’s face but it didn’t even flinch. It lifted the body, hefting it into the air.

I watched, frozen in horror, as the body flew through the air and crashed into the window on the back of our car, shattering it and sending blood everywhere.

“Oh, God!” my mom gasped, finally becoming aware of the monster.

Tears burned in my eyes. I wanted to rip the door open and run away too but I was stuck. I knew it was useless. My limbs were heavy with terror and there was nothing I could do. It didn’t matter. If I left the car, the beast would be on me in an instant but if I stayed, maybe I’d be safe.

I knew I was wrong but I clutched at that tiny flutter of hope anyway. Maybe, it wasn’t that strong. Maybe it wouldn’t be able to get through the sturdy metal of the car.

That hope was dashed as I watched the monster stroll towards the car. It didn’t even bother running, it knew there was no escape. It just wanted to savour my fear.

Its smile was too confident. It knew the car posed no protection against it but still, it wanted to prove it to me. It wanted me to sob.

It reached the back of the car and plucked the body off it, dropping it carelessly onto the floor.

The creature’s face split into a maniacal smile as it slammed its hands down on the boot, the squeal of metal splitting the air as it buckled under the monster’s touch, proving that it would be useless to run or fight.

Tears flowed freely down my face but I couldn’t look away from the mirror, knowing that if I did, I wouldn’t know where it was. Maybe it would have been better not to know.

I couldn’t breathe. My chest burnt but I couldn’t do anything to help it as the monster slowly walked around to the side of the car. Its nail scratched along the paintwork, cutting into it and piecing the metal beneath but I could barely hear the noise over the terrified screams coming from my mom.

I couldn’t move. I couldn’t fight. I couldn’t do anything.

The certainty of death and suffering overpowered me, filling me with a hopelessness I’d never experienced. There was nothing I could do but stare into the monster’s blown-out pupils as its hand slowly curled around my door handle and its face stretched into a wide smile, displaying bloody pointed teeth.

I was thrown forwards and the seatbelt cut painfully into my chest. The silence of the car was disorientating after the deafening noise just moments before.

Nausea threatened to overwhelm me and tears slipped from my eyes as my heart raced. My head snapped to the window, staring at the trees beside us, before my gaze darted to the mirror.

There was no one there. No monster, nothing.

The building site, now barely visible in the rear mirror, bustled with life and activity.

“Urgh!” my mom said, slamming her fist against the steering wheel again. “This traffic is ridiculous. I don’t care what the satnav says, we’re leaving the motorway at the next junction!”

I sagged back into my seat, wiping the tears away as subtly as I could and sucking in a shaky breath, my pulse still racing.

It was fine. I’d escaped. I was safe.

But, I knew that, in some fantasy, I was still there. Still alive, of course, I would be for days still, but wracked with agony. The monster would torture me, drinking in my screams and pain as it slowly feasted on my body.

A shudder went through me and I risked a glance at my mom. She was unaware of the fear that had my hands shaking even now as she fiddled with her phone, trying to find the next album to put on, but she felt my glance.

“What?” she asked, looking up at me.

Her eyes narrowed slightly as she took in my fearful expression and bloodshot eyes.

I swallowed thickly, squeezing my phone as tightly as I could to try and stop the trembling of my hands. How could I explain how close I had come to death?

“What’s wrong?” she demanded.

“Nightmare,” I muttered finally.

There was a pause before she snorted.

“A nightmare?” she asked, her words dripping with ridicule.

“Yeah.”

“What was so horrible about this nightmare?”

I couldn’t tell her. It was pointless. I knew she wouldn’t understand and would just laugh at me instead.

“I don’t really remember it now,” I lied.

Her expression told me she didn’t believe me but she didn’t care to press it any further. She looked back down at her phone, ignoring that the car in front of us had started moving as she searched for something to put on.

Someone behind us beeped, the noise sending my pulse racing again and my gaze scouring our surroundings but she just glared at the person in the mirror.

“Fuck off,” she said venomously, finally selecting a song and moving the car forwards as she gestured rudely at the person behind us. “People have no manners these days.”

She seemed entirely unaware of the irony of her words.

I pressed my hand against my chest, trying to steady my breathing. My heart pounded so hard I could feel it against my palm but, as I sucked in slow and steady breaths, fear started to drain out of me.

It was just a dream. A scary one but still just a dream.

I was safe and I was in control.

“I’m not sitting around here for another second,” my mom said.

She turned the steering wheel sharply, pulling into the empty hard shoulder and speeding past the rows of unmoving cars.

The next exit wasn’t far but time dragged slowly. I wanted to sink low into my seat and hide from everyone we passed but I couldn’t.

Mom smiled victoriously as we pulled off the busy motorway, the satnav telling us off, and joined a smaller but equally busy road.

“Ha! This will be much quicker!” she said smugly as the journey time on the satnav increased significantly.

I let my eyes flutter shut again, not wanting to stay with my mom and hear her continue to go on about what a great decision she’d made.

A tiny flutter of fear gripped my heart as I let dizziness wash over me again but this time, my destination was clear.

“What did you think?” Mitch asked, pulling the respirator from his mouth and lifting the goggles up to his forehead.

I paddled gently, quickly taking in the warm water we were in, and spat the weird rubber mouthpiece out so that I could suck in a proper breath.

The water was shallow where we were, tucked in near a strip of sand at the bottom of a high cliff, and deliciously warm. My mind raced to catch up on what I missed, getting glimpses of the boat, a flash of fear as I fell backwards into the sea and the lingering sense of wonder I’d felt underwater.

“It was good!” I said, following Mitch further onto the beach.

He looked utterly at ease in the water, even with the heavy oxygen tank on his back. Something told me that he’d spent half his life in the water.

“Yeah?” Mitch asked.

From what I now remembered, it had been good. The world was so quiet underwater, just the soft rush of air and muffled sound of bubbles when I breathed. It felt like another world. One where I was weightless and moved so easily and freely. Fish had flitted past us, so close and entirely unbothered by our presence. It had been… wonderful.

“Yeah, it was great!”

I was a little sad that I’d missed it. The memories were good but I wished I could have really experienced it for real.

“Awesome. Well, you did good kid. Shall we head back to the boat?”