《A Snail's Wisdom》Brother Snail
Advertisement
The glade was filled with a dark and grimy smoke billowing out from the center. Kenja couldn't see anything around him, and when he remembered that the snail was trying to kill him, his hand reached for where the snail was previously. He latched onto his robe which touched his chest.
'Where did he go?'
Then he heard a distinctive sound.
Plop
Something dropped into the spirit water. Sensing no immediate threat, he relaxed his grip and waited for the grimy smoke to dissipate. He heard gurgling sounds as the smoke finally dissipated to reveal the rock placed between him and the buckets. The rock looked different: a smooth black substance had coated the surface. Kenja looked at his skin and clothes to see the same black coating. Even the sword was completed smudged.
"Congratulations! You're now a Qi Flourishing cultivator," Kenja heard the familiar voice from behind the rock. He held the blade ready for a life-and-death struggle as he walked around the rock. To his surprise, he could see the snail dipping up and down into the water.
"Weren't you going to kill me?"
"What are you talking about? How could I kill my disciple?"
Kenja didn't respond to the disciple bit but continued questioning the snail.
"And what was the water for?"
"To clean myself. You didn't expect me to move around in your filth, did you?"
When cultivators surpassed their bottlenecks and reached their next stage, they often expelled much of the dirt and grime they had accumulated over their lives. As a result, their bodies and souls would reach a higher purity level, making their skin smoother and bodily features more divine.
"All this...was from me?"
"What? Do you think the tramp farted? Of course it was you! Don't worry though. It's not your fault. You can blame this on your gifts. A big home often creates a big mess."
Kenja nodded his head as he felt a murderous killing intent emanating from his weapon.
"What about the rock?"
"Well, the water would be pointless if your filth enveloped it. What's the point of cleaning yourself with dirty water?"
Kenja felt the headache coming back again which would be impressive since cultivators had very strong temperaments that made them immune or resistant to many common ailments. He walked to one of the buckets and poured water on his weapon first.
He felt a sense of gratitude coming from the sword, and even though no words were said, he believed that they could hold a conversation with each other if they wanted to.
Advertisement
"Stop flirting and get cleaned up. Don't keep your sensei waiting," the snail harrumphed.
Kenja began cleaning the grime off his skin.
"Now that we're student and teacher, let us make introductions. What is your name?"
Kenja rolled his eyes when he heard this. He dipped his right elbow into the bucket and answered, "Kenja, no surname."
"Very well, Kenja, you may call me..."
He paused giving Kenja a sense of déjà vu.
"...Snail-sensei."
'If you can't remember your own name, don't just make one up.'
"I'll call you Servant or Snail, which do you prefer?" Kenja retorted indifferently. The snail's eyes swelled slightly before responding.
"Call me Elder Brother Snail."
"I understand, Younger Brother Snail."
"Fine, fine, call me Snail or Brother Snail," the snail surrendered angrily.
"It will be a joy to be travelling with you Brother Snail," Kenja clasped his hand and bowed. He knew that he shouldn't push his luck with the snail. Kenja had won the battle, but the war was ongoing.
"With you as well...Brother Kenja," the snail squeaked the last words out.
"Now tell me, Brother Kenja. What are your plans? Do you cultivate out of boredom, or are you trying to achieve something?" The snail asked sarcastically. He knew he had to serve Kenja but that did not mean he had to withhold his contempt.
Kenja ignored the sarcasm and placed the sword into the ground next to the snail. Since the sword seemed to be alive, he thought it would be rude to not include it as part of the conversation. He continued cleaning himself as he seemed to be pondering something. Then he paused what he was doing and turned to face them.
"I want to find where I came from?"
The snail's eyes closed and his tentacles sagged as if he heard the least-fulfilling goal there could ever be. He opened his eyes and looked at Kenja.
"You're a human. You came from a woman who probably got knocked up in a tavern by a man she didn't even know! Why does this matter?"
Kenja glared angrily in silence before reaching into his pocket and taking out a pendant with a circular medallion hanging from it. The circular medallion was pearly white with golden specks, and on the center of the medallion, there was an inscription.
Kenja
"I've been to every jeweler and blacksmith in Ryuga, and none of them have been able to identify what this pendant is made of nor its origins. The pendant doesn't rust or erode, and no artisan was capable of putting so much as a scratch on it."
Advertisement
The snail moved his eyes closer to the pendant to examine it. His eyes suddenly bulged and he leaped onto Kenja's fingers, bringing his eyes closer to the medallion. Kenja was a bit surprised, but he was elated to see the snail taking an interest in the pendant. As quickly as he had jumped onto Kenja, he fell off and began laughing hysterically.
"Hahahahaha, kid, you're so interesting, hahahaha."
The sudden change was a little shocking, but Kenja decided to raise a query in the midst of the snail's laughter.
"What's so interesting?"
The snail quickly suppressed his laughter. "You were right to become a cultivator. The material your pendant is made of is called Nirvanic Jade."
"Nirvanic Jade?"
"Must you keep repeating what I say? Yes, Nirvanic Jade. The material is so rare and expensive, just one kez of it can purchase several small kingdoms. It's used by very high-level cultivators for tools and equipment, and the only ones who could inscribe letters onto it are Soul Ascension stage at minimum."
"Soul Ascension?"
Kenja wasn't completely sure about the later stages, but he knew of the first few stages: Body Tempering, Qi Flourishing, Foundation Establishment, Core Crystallization.
"That's too far for you to worry about now. But if you want to find where you came from, you're going to need to raise your cultivation quickly. And I'm not talking about small level ups. We need to get you every possible advantage. I'm talking cultivation techniques, expensive pills, top-of-the-line Immortal's cave...hell, we probably need to find you a few Core Crystallization women to perform double cultivation with when you're resting."
The snail kept talking with no apparent end in sight.
"Why do I need all that?"
The snail paused to look at him as if he were a bumbling fool.
"How else do you plan on raising your cultivation stage after stage?"
"Didn't you just help me get to the Qi Flourishing stage in less than two breaths? Couldn't we continue going like this?"
The snail casually swung his head with his eyes closed.
"Tsk, tsk, tsk. What do you take cultivation for? How could it be that easy? This time was a one-time thing. Your body had been tempered to the point of an imminent breakthrough, but your constitutions kept you from pushing through the bottleneck. Even with my incredible assistance and all this dense Qi, you couldn't push through the bottleneck."
Kenja was puzzled. If he didn't pass through the bottleneck, then how could he be at the Qi Flourishing stage right now?
"Then how did I break through the bottleneck?"
The snail looked at Kenja with an air of disappointment. "Must I explain everything to you?"
After verbally putting Kenja down, he continued with his explanation, "You experienced an adrenaline rush."
Kenja thought back to a few minutes ago when the snail told him that he fell into a trap and was about to die. His heart rate rose, thinking speed improved, and the Qi swiftly and cleanly cycled through his meridians and congregated in his dantian like never before.
"Actually, I am not surprised you don't know this. It isn't a widely-known fact that adrenaline helps with cultivation and passing through bottlenecks. But the amount of adrenaline needed isn't easy to produce at will. Only when your life is in danger would your instinctual defense mechanisms produce the necessary amount to help you achieve a breakthrough in cultivation. If all cultivators learned of this, what do you think they would do?"
Kenja thought about it for a second before responding, "They would seek life-threatening situations."
"Precisely. Not only would cultivators become more aggressive towards one another, but sects would begin to seek conflict with each other as well. Even mortals would be threatened as some cultivators might begin performing crimes in order to involve themselves with danger or gather pursuers. The Immortal world would literally begin courting death in order to advance to Immortality," the snail chuckled at the irony.
"And that's why I made you think your life was in danger. You were stuck, and I helped you through the bottleneck. But will you believe my threat the next time? Of course not! Regardless of what we can or cannot do right now, you're going to need some outside assistance. So let's find us a sect and raise me an army of followers," the snail said happily.
"Raise you an army of followers?"
The snail froze flabbergasted. After a breath, he quickly corrected himself, "Of course, I meant 'raise you an army of followers.'"
Kenja's left eye twitched.
'This snail...' Kenja's headache had finally arrived.
Advertisement
- In Serial82 Chapters
Dungeon Core/Realm Heart
Dao Lord Brandr has cheated death many times over the millennia, enough to know that this time he should have died. There was just no surviving what had happened to him. Fortunately or unfortunately, he did. Well... that depends on what you call surviving really. His body is gone and so is pretty much all of his mighty cultivation base. To add to this, he has suffered severe damage to his soul and as if that wasn't bad enough he's lost, far away from any world he knows and maybe even his universe. Now, he's just learned from a being called a sprite that he's some sort of sentient mystic realm called a dungeon and that just for the crime of existing, there would be legions of enemies planning to pillage and destroy him. It's okay though. Apparently, he can make legions of his own. Seeing what he has to work with, Brandr decides that perhaps, all is not lost after all...
8 331 - In Serial33 Chapters
The War Golem
Goblins craft their greatest weapon, a massive body of iron and enchantment. To complete the war golem, they summon the most evil being in existence and bind his spirit to their creation. What they wanted was a video game character; unfortunately, what they got was a teenage griefer.
8 159 - In Serial7 Chapters
The Quest For The Golden Turd: Book Form
This Book Has Crude Humor And it was based of a movie I made on youtube and i was younger and i wanted to correct stuff by making a book. Author Daniel Noah p.s thanks gej302 for the cover!
8 151 - In Serial21 Chapters
Reincarnated as an Aircraft Carrier
Guns, wyverns, and aircraft carriers! Deck maintenance guy is killed in WW3 and reawakens as an aircraft carrier—just in time to serve America once more! The world's mysteries this time includes the origin of demons and woOoo ~spirit ships~ … I have decent worldbuilding skills, I swear! *** I'm not American and I initially started writing this story as a joke. The joke has spiraled too far and I won't stop now. I will make zero effort to do research and all the effort to do decently-paced updates. I'm also posting on ScribbleHub under the same username. Soft CW: Decent amount of swearing, but it's not maliciously aimed.
8 79 - In Serial69 Chapters
Your daily doze of memes
It's pretty much memes I'll be posting ⊙ω⊙
8 180 - In Serial11 Chapters
ghostmyers fanfic (๑•́ ₃ •̀๑)
just some ghostmyers related stuff, this is my first time writing a fanfic so please bear with me!!Ps. I've never been deep into the Halloween or scream franchises. Just know a lil bit so sorry for any lore mistakes!!! After all I wrote this fanfic purely cuz I play ghostie and Micheal on dead by daylight!!!!!!!! cover art is by me!!
8 138

