《A Snail's Wisdom》Chapter 101: It's Good to Carry Extra
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The entire sect held its breath.
One, two, three, four. Four pairs of pants were counted, but there were only three elders.
Where did the fourth set come from?
"Look closely, Fourth Brother," Gao Diao advised Ariyoshi Miji as he gestured to the pants he was currently wearing.
He squinted at the pants for a second before jerking his head to the pants he was clutching onto.
"When did you—? Cheating! This has to be cheating!"
Unsure of what caused the Fourth Elder to react in such a manner, everyone squinted at the pants the Sixth Elder was wearing presently, expecting to find some clue or hint towards the reason, but none could perceive anything substantial.
"Don't be childish. You can see for yourself: I was wearing these at the start." He pinched the pants he was currently wearing to emphasize the reality of the situation.
"You cheating fox! You did it underground, didn't you?"
They were experts who had cultivated to the Nascent Soul stage. Their eyesight and brain power were dozens of times stronger than mortals. Counting the thread count of a rival's outfit in a few seconds of casual interaction was nothing unusual for one at their level, and this was before mentioning that they had been in each other's company for the past few days.
In the midst of their battle, Ariyoshi Miji was too busy fighting to check whether the pants Gao Diao wore were the same pants he had on at the beginning of the fight. Now that he intentionally pointed it out, Ariyoshi Miji could immediately discern the differences.
He must have put the pants on after he dove underground in the beginning.
Ariyoshi Miji grit his teeth in annoyance, turning to Vice Elder Bai.
"Junior brother, the Third and Sixth Elders have lost their pants. Shouldn't you announce the results of the match?"
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There was no need to argue with Gao Diao; all that mattered was Vice Elder Bai's judgment.
The presiding vice elder was taken aback by the situation, uncertain of the proper course of action.
"Flowing River Handbook, Volume 11, Page 5022, Article 41, Paragraph 3, start from the second sentence, junior brother," Gao Diao instructed Vice Elder Bai.
Vice Elder Bai nodded and took out a thin booklet from his storage bag.
To Kenja, the handbook appeared to have no more than ten or so pages, but the pages he flipped seemed to have no end as a flourish of hundreds of pages swept by his hand until he paused and flipped back a couple of pages.
"Revision 729: The pants to be stripped must be worn at the beginning of the match and must be removed in its entirety to result in defeat. Shields, tricks, traps, hallucinations, and the like concerning the lower body are permitted as long as the original pants have not been removed completely."
The Sixth Elder stroked his moustache derisively at the Fourth Elder who began grinding his teeth to hold back his temper.
Third Elder Kondo shattered the silence, "The rules are clear, Fourth Brother. We have not lost yet."
The Fourth and Sixth Elder stared at him with looks of incredulity.
Having lost his pants, he had worn a downtrodden, defeated expression only moments ago.
He was only wearing what most would describe as traditional, borderline ancient, underwear at the moment, so where did he get his confidence from?
Did his head get hit in their exchange?
Noticing the looks his two opponents were giving him, he pointed down at his fundoshi. "Just like Sixth Brother, I still have my actual pants on."
Gao Diao's nose twitched uncomfortably at his words.
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Where was the similarity to him? Kondo was wearing underwear that barely covered up his essentials. Not pants!
Please, refrain from lumping us together, Third Brother…
"Those can't be considered pants, right?" Ariyoshi Miji asked Gao Diao and Vice Elder Bai.
Gao Diao sighed out loud. "The rules determining what can be considered "pants" is mostly broad and ambiguous as multiple edits and revisions continually expanded the list to the extent that, thanks to forty-third generation Elder Greenpants, even palm leaves would be deemed acceptable. As long as the wearer claims to wear it casually and without shame to the extent that Vice Elder Bai accepts them, that is enough…"
With that, the three elders turned to Vice Elder Bai who felt the simultaneous pressure of three Nascent Soul daoists staring at him.
The number of wrinkles on his face seemed to grow alongside his deepening frown and increasing frustration.
One elder's pants were nearly torn to shreds; the second had a second pair prepared underneath the first, and the third was claiming his underwear were his pants. For heaven's sake, his hairy buttocks were clearly visible for all the younger disciples to gawk at!
Sighing, Vice Elder Bai promptly shut the book and retreated back into the air without saying a word, indicating his stance on the matter.
Ariyoshi Miji shredded the pants in his hands out of anger only to see Gao Diao toss Kondo a red-striped pill before taking one himself.
An Agility Boosting Pill!
Raising his foot up, he planned to use his [Flamingo Stride] to prevent them from consuming the pills, but numerous vines grew out of the earth to stop him.
"Cheaters, cheaters, cheaters! The lot of ya! Working together to suppress a little, old man! Our sect's elders have no shame!!!"
They did not bother replying to him.
Gao Diao and Kondo rushed towards Ariyoshi Miji, cooperating with their vines and swords to prevent him from utilizing his [Flamingo Stride]. His technique's extreme speed was too big of an advantage in this three-way match, so they worked together to restrain him.
With their amplified speed, they were able to prevent him from retreating and utilizing his more radical martial arts.
[Hummingbird Flutter]
Ariyoshi Miji weaved and dashed short distances in quick bursts much like a hummingbird flitted between flowers. Using this technique, he could barely dodge the numerous flying swords and earth vines, along with their physical assaults.
Alas, he was unable to pull away from them.
Unfortunately, two palms struggled to guard against four fists (and countless swords and vines). Even though he was able to fend off their attacks, his pants accrued more rips and tears as minuscule pieces of cloth were severed from the slowly shrinking trousers.
If this continued, he would definitely be the first to lose.
As if he could let that happen!
He stepped towards Kondo and Gao Diao, allowing a palm attack and a flying sword to rip one pant leg off. He clapped his palms together right in front of their faces and a blinding light engulfed the sect, originating from the clap.
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