I couldn’t even shiver the ice held me so completely. Couldn’t blink, couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t think. Time lost meaning. Everything became hazy as my focus narrowed to the aching contrast between the soul stealing cold and the stabbing heat blazing from my bless mark.

It was agony. My whole body kept trying to shiver or steal actual warmth from my mark, anything to warm up, but nothing worked. I couldn’t move even to shiver and my mark’s fierce prickling and heat were only a reminder that it was active. My mark wasn’t going to even give a hint of real warmth to the skin around it any time soon.

So I was stuck, unable to get warmer thanks to the magical frost or fade into the oblivion of sleep—or more—thanks to my frozen eyes and my mark keeping me going. Sleeping with my eyes open wasn’t a trick that came to me, not even then.

My only distraction was what I could stare at in front of me. I couldn’t say I was actively watching, but there were times when I could focus a bit more on the scene in front of me rather than the internal war over temperature.

One of those times was watching the High Priestess get saved. It happened very shortly after everything had froze, before I completely lost all sense of time other than knowing it was bright or dark out.

She had been caught in the wave of supernatural cold the same as me. White frost and clear ice coated her skin and clothes, though she was so unnaturally pale to begin with that it was difficult to make out the effect from this distance except for where it transitioned onto her dark clothes. The stiffness of her raised arms, robes, and hair despite gusts of wind also gave away that we were in similar circumstances.

The High Priestess, however, didn’t have a mark that kept her alive despite the freezing cold and inability to breathe. She might be called the Lady of Frost and have the goddess’s boon that mitigated the elements’ effects, but I didn’t think that meant much when it came to being frozen solid.

Apprehension and worry pressed up against each other in my belly. Surely, she wouldn’t have sacrificed herself simply for “preventive measures”? She was the High Priestess! Dying to make sure no one in the region hurt another pine tree for a month was ludicrous. She hadn’t been a part of this fight and even with the goddess’s wrath on the line, Lithunia surely would be more help alive than dead.

A dark hand reached from the shadow behind the High Priestess and my fears quickly became premature and short lived. Corrin, the whisper woman who had saved me after Jin’s life-threatening training, followed her reaching hand out of the shadow before quickly taking in the scene around her. She didn’t notice me, but she saw Lithunia straight away.

Corrin moved closer to the High Priestess and, without preamble, reached around her to place her palm on the other woman’s forehead. In my head I pictured Corrin saying “Be as you were,” like she had when she took away my bleeding wounds and bruises.

A few moments later and what color the High Priestess had had returned to her skin and hair, no longer frozen over. She lowered her arms and shook them out before laying a gentle hand on Corrin’s arm. Corrin smiled, a bit deferential, as she gave a small bow. They spoke a little longer before disappearing back into the tree’s shadow.

An escape plan.

If I could have ranted and raved and glared my heart out I would have in that moment. Corrin’s blessing could only be used once a day and within an hour of sustaining whatever she wished to cure. Even if they had noticed me, once she had saved the High Priestess there was no hope she could save me. The wait time before when she could use her blessing again was too long.

Instead I got to freeze and watch the ice thicken.

All alone in the destroyed and empty camp.

Later I would learn that it took over two days for Prevna to search through all the wounded filling up the healer’s nests as well as Seed Landing only to find that I was nowhere to be found. I don’t know why she bothered, but I also couldn’t say I wasn’t glad that she did. After that it took her another two days to find Mishtaw and tell her that I was nowhere to be found which only prompted our squad leader to take up her own search. When she ended up with the same lackluster findings as Prevna and Prevna convinced her that, no, I really couldn’t be lying dead somewhere, Mishtaw took the case to Tasha, who she knew had brought me back to the main camp.

That was when the truth came out. In the rush to return to the Seedling Palace after the High Priestess’s announcement, everyone had assumed that someone else had brought me back or had forgotten that I was a seedling who hadn’t yet earned the boon to travel through shadows.

Apparently, rumors about a seedling killing a sea snake had become prevalent, so much so that it seemed like their subject had also returned to the Seedling Palace. Some were edged with another rumor that the tree branch had broken because someone had done healing without healing beads, but no one was ready to believe a person would be stupid enough to actually attempt that.

Nor did it help that the changing of the seasons was fast approaching and those that could were busy helping prepare for the Welcome of the Winds. I hadn’t given much, or any, thought to the coming celebration since the last month of the cold season had been more devoted to earning my place at the Seedling Palace back and killing fish before they could grievously injure me.

As it was, it took more days of convincing before a tiny search party was allowed to be sent out after a single, missing seedling. It consisted of Mishtaw, Prevna, and Tasha, who must have felt a bit guilty for abandoning me in the first place.

When they came I was heavily lost in the cold. They had stepped out of the shadow on a branch lower than where Tasha left me, but despite the sudden sound of voices and footfalls, I couldn’t bring myself to focus on the intrusion. It wasn’t like I could shout or move to get their attention—if they were even here for me.

The sounds of their progress got slowly closer; searching and climbing an ice ridden tree was no easy task. I stared at my patch of branches in front of me, the jagged end of the broken branch of the tree across the nearly drained camp, and the frost coated root wall beyond. Sometimes I almost thought I had drawn in a freezing breath, with the way the cold knifed its way back to my spine, or that I somehow managed to sleep, but I think those lost moments were more due to the teeth aching cold that stole my attention more often that not.

The goddess’s gaze was like the brush of pine needles against my skin, but She didn’t turn Her head and let Her gaze fully consume me. Sometimes I wondered if it annoyed Her for me to be constantly on the edge of her awareness while I was near death or if it wasn’t truly Her gaze that I felt. Sometimes, when the cold became so unbearable that I thought I would snap under its hold, despite my mark, I pictured balling it up along with the frost and ice and throwing the freezing combination at the eye peering just past my shoulder.

Perhaps not my brightest moment, but I could have sworn that the cold wasn’t as freezing for a moment or two.

It didn’t take Prevna and the two whisper women long to find me on the branch once finally climbed up to the correct level. Now that they knew to look for me, I was no longer nearly as difficult to notice as before.

Prevna spotted me first. She let out a shout of alarm before rushing over to me and placing a hand on my shoulder. She snatched it back with a hiss, the cold too much for her even with her gloves. I could barely see her on the edge of my vision and only knew Mishtaw and Tasha came after her from the sound of their steps.

“Are you sure she’s alive? She looks frozen solid,” Tasha asked. I could hear the frown in her tone.

“She is,” Prevna insisted. “She can’t die even if she wanted to. That’s her blessing. I’ve seen it.”

There was some shuffling and then Mishtaw leaned into my view, inspecting my face and then where the ice connected me to the branch. “She’s not breathing. It’s been nearly a week…”

“Gimley’s alive.” Prevna held firm. “If you need more proof you can ask her tribe or Jin. I bet she’s seen proof based on her training.” Her voice softened, “We can’t leave her like this.”

Mishtaw sighed heavily. “I don’t see how we can unfreeze her either. This isn’t normal ice and if we try to move her there’s a good chance we’ll take off skin or bark. We can’t risk damaging the tree after what caused this mess.”

“Another whisper woman—”

Tasha cut her off, “Another might have a blessing that can help, but none come immediately to mind and there’s no guarantee she would be able to come help. Not with the season’s changing and the difficulties this region has caused.”

“Then what are we supposed to do?” Prevna pressed, sounding more serious and mulish than I was used to hearing from her.

They quieted as they thought and Mishtaw continued to inspect me. A few names of whisper women were offered and discarded because they weren’t available or Mishtaw and Tasha didn’t think they’d be able to convince them to come. The idea of building a fire close by and maintaining was also brought up and rejected for fear of setting the whole tree on fire and no good place to balance it in the branches. The Seedling Palace’s magic didn’t apply here.

Then Mishtaw hit upon what seemed like my only option other than waiting and seeing if I thawed out naturally. It still involved waiting and not doing much, but the test date was much closer than the other unreliable possibility.

“The warming winds might thaw her out. Goddess influenced winds and goddess influenced ice.”

Mishtaw paused and then added, “I doubt She will want to undo Her High Priestess’s work so this coast might be avoided this year.”

Prevna brightened. “We could bring chimes and streamers like the tribes do to celebrate the winds and draw Her good favor. Even if the winds don’t reach the coast perhaps She’ll bring them here so a mark of…” she trailed off, probably taking in the devastation around us again before rallying, “…power doesn’t get left to ruin? We’ll need this base again once the coast melts.”

Mishtaw agreed, “That argument might work.” She stood. “Let’s return to the Palace. I’ll speak to a few people and see what can be done.”

“But—”

“There’s nothing more we can do for her now.”

Prevna stiffened by my side before quickly touching my shoulder again despite the cold. “I’ll be back.”

Tasha waited until the pair both moved away closer to the trunk before she quietly spoke, “I’m sorry that I didn’t bring you immediately back to the Seedling Palace. If you do break free of the ice know that I owe you a debt.”

I felt her gaze on me a moment longer before she turned and followed after Mishtaw and Prevna. I could still barely think for the cold but I knew those were words that I would not forget in the haze. I could only hope their theory was correct and that the warming winds would not be delayed on the goddess’s whim this year.