Women are scary.

They bounce back from the most tragic circumstances with extreme prejudice.

How do I know such wisdom?

Is it my many years working with Dryad?

My millennia of observing humanoid behavior patterns?

Perhaps even, dare I say it, divine inspiration?

None of the above!

I simply am watching such a situation after I woke up.

How devastating must it be to be unable to purchase the newest product of a genius alchemist, even if you are related to them?

F’neli knows such a pain now…

Ah well, life lessons like this are what keep people growing right?

Right!

Of course, no alchemist is able to get things right 100% of the time.

As such, I have turned into the unfortunate soul tasked with taking care of the remains of pill slag that occurs. It is all due to accidentally devouring a tasty morsel of new-made pills when no one was looking.

Somehow, someway, S’neli drew a link between the missing pill slag and me.

I say, that’s just mean, it isn’t like I’m a glutton or anything!

Anyways, while no one ever sees it, all pill slag that is placed near my resting place in the store…

Vanishes.

I mean, it’s not like I can just leave food lying out now can I?

That’s a travesty that is!

Besides, some of this stuff is kind of tasty.

Admittedly, it’s not enough to keep me sustained.

In order to keep from going hungry, I ran a root all the way out to the ocean. From there I consume massive quantities of marine life, water, and mineral mud. I can safely say, the recent lack of Krakens has nothing to do with me.

At all.

The fact that shipping has become noticeably safer has made a few merchants, the ones that Mishra didn’t bankrupt, scratch their heads. However, good old greed has caused them to shrug and ignore the signs of a greater predator nearby.

A side effect of my method of eating, is that it causes a decent amount of root growth. While my main body hasn’t managed to grow due to lack of Order, I have managed to cover the entire storefront in my roots.

I considered counting the root growth towards ‘Tree Height’ however, it just doesn’t ring true. Root growth is different from actual trunk, branch, and leaf growth, there’s no way around it.

Shoplifters, thugs, shady guards, shifty bums, and the odd cat have learned the hard way not to cause trouble in the store. After all, those who cause trouble are not seen again.

Pill ingredients are always needed after all…along with snacks…

For that reason my plan is moving smoothly, on average every two weeks results in another recipe being devoured by S’neli. She’s a sharp little alchemy genius that has even taking to improving the recipes I know.

Now, alchemy does cost money. Of course, that’s taken care of by S’neli’s trusted follower, Mishra. That’s right, my servant is a trusted follower. She takes care of all the minor issues around here like zoning permits, legal staff on hand, shop sale taxes, and the rest. I must say, freeing this catkin was one of my most recent best decisions.

Can I blame her for using her new powers to enact revenge here and there tracelessly? Nah.

I’m no ‘Hero’ with a limited view of the world after all.

Mishra. I reached out into the aether to contact my servant.

Yes, Master Plant? Mishra responded promptly.

Has the research into temples, priests, and such things finished?

I have a few things on hand, however progress is slow. The temples keep information on a tight leash, almost as if they have been warned. Currently I am searching for some excommunicated individuals to gather better information from. Those types always have particular tastes that require money to satistfy.

Oh? Is it possible I didn’t seal my soul fast enough? Perhaps the Divinities of this world may already have an inkling something hungers for them…

I briefly thought of going back into the forest to murder Mizarul who is the only other being besides my own that knows I exist, but decided against dragonocide. It’s just bad form to murder someone that was so helpful after all, besides killing someone useful like that is hard to justify. What’s the point of power if I can’t make a mistake here and there? Admittedly, I should thank my lucky stars I decided to seal myself before they could locate me. I bet I blazed brightly in the aether, like a red sun to the background of normal power on this planet.

Take your time, devote around 25% of our income to this expense. The chance to feed is priceless to me.

Understood, Master Plant. I will devote greater efforts towards this action. Mishra replied, her tone containing fervous zeal.

I’m not sure where the zeal comes from, although I have noticed that when Mishra stares at me sometimes for long moments, there are flames deep within her eyes.

Meh, it’s not a big concern to me.

I have occasionally thought of speeding up my plans, releasing my true powers, unsealing my soul, and simply gorging myself. However, each time the thought comes up I restrain myself. If I have learned anything, it’s that I’m currently in a long-term war with Divinities spanning across multiple universes. It might even be the famed ‘multi-verse’ theory in action. Such a war can take a long time, and one Tree cannot do everything alone.

Witness how even now, my main partner Dryad is out of action?

This means I will need allies, and there are no better allies than the ones you gain, I mean create on your own!

I’ve theorized that a Chaos Alchemist would possibly be able to help me grow even better than the crude method I have now. Just like normal plants grow better under the care of a Gardener than in the wild where they must fight for every resource.

Eventually it might even be possible to create something like ‘fertilizer’ for me to grow in!

The future is definitely looking up for this Tree!

Watching everything working like clockwork around the shop due to the incredible efficiency of Mishra, I decide to go back to sleep.

Ah, there’s another group of thugs trying to muscle in, these guys are like cockroaches…

Crunch.

Robbers have a taste unique to their breed!