Dean breaks the heavy silence. “I’ll keep watch until first light. I… couldn’t sleep anyway.”

I’m suddenly aware that the new girl, Loreian, isn’t taking her eyes off me.

“Oh, sorry, I meant to offer. Did you need healing?”

“Nope, already got myself and Seth. You heal too then?”

My eyes sharpen, scrutinizing her. No, she doesn’t seem to be messing with me, but… does that mean she knows Energy? No, maybe she’s just a normal cleric-like healer or something.

“Yeah. I wasn’t sure anyone else did. It’s such a… rare ability, healing. It’s weird how almost nobody even has the resource to do it, right?”

“Neither Amy nor Seth have anything that is more magical so far, so I’m not really sure what is normal yet. Apart from Marie and that guy conjuring lights, I don’t know of anyone who uses Mana. For all I know, Mana and Energy could be equally common. Which one do you use?” I almost laugh, despite myself. My attempts at subtly figuring her out were completely wasted. She really has no idea how uncommon Energy is. Granted, the only reason I know it is is because the system told me all my Energy skills were uncommon, and that I got the first iteration of ‘Tamer’ in all of humanity. I have to assume that such a thing wouldn’t be common otherwise. That, and the guru back in the tutorial said only people who already had some ability with Energy could learn it, even with the system. I should ask Rav if his arcane skills have ‘uncommon’ tags as well.

My surprise must have shown on my face, because she tilts her head, frowning slightly. “What?”

“Nothing. Here.” I extend my hand, and a chunk of Light flows to my fingertips. “Take my hand.” She cautiously reaches out and takes it, seeming weirdly unphased that my hand is literally emitting light. I push the Light into her.

Only a bit gets through before I sense a counterattack and snatch my hand away. “Fuck…” I mutter under my breath. Why does everyone have to fucking do that. I shake off the numbness, ignoring the weird look she’s giving me. “If you’re an Energy user, you should be better at not attacking allies.” My voice is a little too tinged with anger, partially from pain, and partially because I had hoped that she was… more experienced. That she could teach me. It looks like she barely understands how Energy works in this new world.

“I’m sorry, what? I wasn’t.” She states flatly.

“You’ve healed others, right? How do you not know-... have you ever healed anyone besides Seth and Amy?”

“I hadn’t encountered anyone besides them before yesterday so no. Would that make a difference?”

“They probably trust you, so yeah. People naturally lash out against unfamiliar Energy when they don’t already have a certain trust or acceptance of the person.”

“So I shouldn’t do that…” she pauses “let me try something.” She closes her eyes. “Try again?”

“There’s no need.” I don’t want to get burned again. “Just move around the stuff I gave you.”

Her frown deepens as she seems to focus more, and the Light slowly moves around her hand. So she can actively control Energy, that’s confirmed. Albeit very slowly… I shake my head. I’m being unfair. I highly doubt she’s had as many life or death situations.

“Your glowing Energy responds sluggishly compared with mine, but it seems manageable. I don’t think I can really do anything with it other than move it.” She remarks, still focused.

Well, that explains it being so slow. But she’s piqued my curiosity.

“Give me some of yours. Make it non-hostile this time, yeah?”

She offers her hand, and I feel a moment of trepidation as my defenses are tested. My Energy naturally starts to rile, but I force it to relent. A small number of gray strands enter and float listlessly around my hand. I try to move them the same way I move the rest of my Energy, but they doesn’t seem to care. I take some green Energy I have lying around and use that to push it, which works in much the same way as fragments, but that’s it. I was hoping for more. On a whim, I run golden Energy into it.

Neon yellow flashes, one after another, explode out as the dull gray strands slowly take on a yellow hue, before becoming full on gold. The process doesn’t seem to consume my Energy, but instead, the proximity is sufficient to ‘convert’ her Energy to mine. The new Energy is a little slow, but I can control it and change its function much the same as the rest of my own. I spend a bit of time swirling the strands around, making interesting patterns and enjoying the light show. The colors are all made much more vibrant with the addition of the Light, and I can see so much more detail in my little internal world… and something strange.

I hadn’t noticed before, because I had full Energy, but there are occasionally very slight pulses from various parts of my body. I manage to have some Light close to one as it pulses, and cluster more around, focusing my attention on it.

It’s… a rune. A very small ‘self’ rune, that produces my basic, golden Energy at a constant rate.

Well. That answers a lot of questions… and also gives me an extremely important idea.

“Thanks, sorry I need to-“ I don’t even bother finishing. Everyone had already gone about their business, so only Dean bore witness to my rudeness, but I’m beyond caring. I basically sprint to the end of the hall, catching Kaythe as he falls to land on me, and slide down the rocky incline to the underground lake. Good, she’s here.

“Lauren I-“ “Hold on.”

I stop. Oh, right, we were fighting or something. It’s so immensely unimportant compared with testing out my idea, but her face, set in grim determination, gives me pause.

“Alright, go ahead.”

She takes a deep breath. “So I was a fucking jerk, and that’s on me. Sorry.” She lets the rest of the breath fall away, like she thought it was going to be longer but ran out of stuff to say. It takes a real effort for me to not be immediately dismissive, not because I don’t care about her feelings, but because my news is so much more pressing. I was mostly sad before because I felt like she didn’t value our friendship like I did, but… it’s also really good to know she does, and I can’t prevent the smile from crossing my face.

“Nothing to forgive, we’re good. I’m glad you’re feeling better. Now, seriously, I need you to trust me for a bit, because I’m about to attempt SCIENCE.”

“That was not a promising or comforting way to frame that.”

“Listen, yes, but I’m excited. Two step process here. First, I want you to resist my Energy as much as you can.”

“Uhh…? Ok? How? You never really taught me anything about Energy, you fuck.”

“Just… I don’t know, push out with your mind, form a barrier of your will along the area we’re in contact.”

She shakes her head. “You’re not helpful at all. Whatever, I’ll try.”

I take her hand and try pushing a lot of green Energy in… and just as usual, no resistance, no counterattack.

“You don’t have any Energy at all.”

“...Yeah? How could I when there’s a giant, Energy eating hole in my chest?”

“No, well, yes, but that’s only part of it. I’ve never seen you produce Energy either. Any of the times I’ve tried healing you, or even while actively studying- err, trying to fix your condition, I’ve never seen the same natural defenses that everyone else has. At first I thought it was my Energy perception being too weak, but now I think I’ve got it: something destroyed your sense of self!”

The look she gives me speaks volumes about what she thinks of my excitement. “You’d better start making sense soon or you’re getting punched.” Her level stare indicates she means it, and I frantically try to clarify.

“It wasn’t anything Nate did, at least, if it was, Lynn would have had it as well and she didn’t, and I don’t know of anything here that could willingly do that kind of damage. Doesn’t eliminate the possibility, but I think that damage happened before you got here. Before the game. Something you might not remember well, if at all, left a permanent mark on you.”

She stares into my eyes for a moment, searching, before looking away. “Huh. So what?”

“So,” I gush, “I think I can replace what was broken! I- I mean, if you’re ok with it. It would cost me a bit, but I think it would… permanently fix things for you.”

An Energy rune or ‘self’. I could do it, and I’m almost positive that it would work.

“No thanks.”

“Ok great- ...no?!”

“Yeah I… think what you want to do would work, and I don’t want you to.”

“Why?”