*The Deck - Armory *

I stood there staring at the wolf woman in front of me and the old man standing in front of her. How the hell are these two father and daughter? I shook my head at the way they were acting, it was more like friends instead of father and daughter. The father probably got together with another wolf woman and they had a daughter so that explains him being human and her being wolf woman. What race is she by the way? I need to ask her later when the time is better.

Sylvie noticed my confusion and clarified what she meant, “He isn’t my blood father, but I met him after my real father told me some news that kind of ruined our relationship a bit. Fred here understood my plight and we just kind of hit it off. He has been quite a bit of a father figure to me in a way that my real dad had issues doing due to some stupid shit. Stupid fucking council...”

She muttered that last bit before she went to talking back with Fred, they were almost ignoring me and tuning into some world of father and daughter only. After a few minutes I decided to walk around and look at the weapons and stuff that where laying around. There was a huge amount, of different types, of weapons all throughout the armory. There were swords, polearms, axes, daggers, pistols, sub-machineguns, assault rifles, and many more types.

I was honestly shocked to see so many different types, usually guns and other projectile based weapons would be separate from the swords and stuff, but not here. I walked around looking at the different pistols, because I needed a good pair to use for myself. There were all kinds of pistols lying about even some I had seen on earth. There were M1911s, M9s, and USP. 45s among them. The pair that drew my eyes though were a pair hanging crisscrossed on the wall.

It was a beautiful, huge pair of pistols, below them was a sign hanging that read “Caelum et Infernum”. It was a very flamboyant and ominous name that actually kind of fit the pair. Caelum et Infernum is actually Latin and it means Heaven and Hell. The pair of pistols were oppsites in color, one was pure white and the other was pitch black, and had the words Caelum and Infernum engraved on their sides. The white one had Caelum, for Heaven, engraved on it while the black one had Infernum, for Hell, engraved on it.

I stood there staring at the pair of pistols for quite a while or at least it could have been. I was kind of oblivious to my surroundings at the time so I didn’t know how long it had been or the old man that had snuck up behind me, “Beautiful aren’t they laddie?” I kind of jumped at the sound and was brought back to reality. I looked to my left and saw Fred standing next to me looking at me with a small grin on his face. I nodded towards him, “Yes they are and deadly looking as well.”

He laughed at that, “I’m sure they are, but unfortunately no none has been able to use them yet so we really don’t know.” I furrowed my brows in confusion, “Why hasn’t anybody been able to use them?” He sighed before answering, “Unfortunately we don’t know that either. Many of our most proficient gun handlers have tried, but no one can get the magazines out or even get the trigger to squeeze.” I widened my eyes in shock and then looked back at the pair of pistols. I suddenly had an urge, “Let me try them old man.”

He laughed, “Call me Fred laddie and are you sure you want to was your time with them? We have plenty of weapons to choose from that can actually be used. These are mainly here for decorative purposes now.” I nodded my head towards him and then looked at the pistols, “Yeah I am sure, I want to at least give it a try.” Fred sighed and then shrugged his shoulders making his way over to the two pistols. He lifted them up off the hooks with a grunt and then sat them on the table, they made a heavy thud sound as he sat them down. I walked over towards the two pistols and grabbed them by the handles. When I went to lift them up I was dumbfounded at the sheer weight of them. I had to strain myself just to pick them up, they had to weight almost eighty pounds or more a piece. What the fuck is up with this absurd weight for a pistol. I aimed the pistols at the far wall away from Fred and the other weapons; I have no clue where Sylvie went, but she probably had something important to do. I tried to pull the triggers, but like Fred said nothing happened. It was like the safety was on, but the guns had no safety button so there was no way to deactivate it.

I stood there staring at the weapons in my hands my arms were starting to ache just holding them up so I put my arms down to my side for a minute and thought of something. I lifted the pistols up and spoke, “Caelum et Infernum.” Nothing happened like I wanted so I had a disheartened look on my face causing Fred to speak up, “Many have tried that too laddie, we all thought they may be locked by voice control or something so we have all tried different combinations of the words on the sides of the guns. If we knew what the words meant, we might have a better chance of using them.”

As soon as he said the last part another idea hit me; I lifted the pistols up again and spoke one more time, “Heaven and Hell.” Right after the words left my mouth I was greeted with a pain in the palm of my hand and a flood of information entered my brain. The information flow was quick and sort of painful. After the information passed I sat the pistols down on the counter and looked at my hands. Right in the middle of my palms on both hands there were two red points where blood was coming out slowly. After a few seconds the spots on my hands healed up and the blood stopped running.

Fred was looking at me and the pistols in confusion, “What did you do laddie?” I looked at the pistols, my palms, and then back at Fred, “I didn’t do anything except say what the words engraved on the weapons meant.” When I said this Fred eyes widened up, “You know what the words mean!?” He was utterly shocked at what I had said, I nodded my head, “Yeah I know what they mean. The words Caelum et Infernum are Latin words and they mean Heaven and Hell.”

He looked confused for a second before speaking, “Latin? What language is that?” I can see why he wouldn’t know what it is. The language was invented on my home planet which isn’t a spacefaring planet yet. My question is; how did the language end up on weapons on this planet? I pushed that thought to the back of my mind and spoke to Fred again, “Latin is an almost dead language from back home that I happen to have an interest in.” Fred nodded his head without asking any other questions, “I see so the language is specific to your planet, it would make sense if not many people new the language, especially if it is almost dead on your planet.”

I nodded my head, “Yeah, so when I said the words there was a pain in my palm followed by a flood of information into my head.” This peeked Fred’s interest some more, “Oh? So what was the information about?” I looked over at the weapons before talking, “It was about the pistols and what they can do. I think whatever pricked my palms was the transfer method and may have possibly been a way of marking ownership.” To test my theory, I picked up the pistols and found out that they practically weighed nothing. They felt natural in my hands and it was like holding a normal pistol, I honestly barely noticed they were there and if I wouldn’t have been staring at them I might not have.

I looked over at Fred, “They practically weigh nothing now.” When he heard this he was shocked and his face clearly showed it, “Let me see them.” I flipped Heaven around, which is when I noticed that the engravings on the weapons changed to the English version of the words. Fred grabbed a hold of Heaven and as soon as I let go the weapon and his hand smashed into the counter making the metal counter buckle under the weight. We both stared in shock at the weapon. What the hell is going on? I clearly sat the weapon on the counter a second ago and it didn’t weigh this much. Fred was trying to pick the pistol up to no avail, he was straining hard enough that the vessels on his arms were popping out. Before Fred gave himself a hernia I reached over and picked up Heaven and it lifted off the table like it had no weight to it again.

This was all very interesting, I searched my memories for the information about the two weapons and found the information I was looking for. I looked a Fred, who was nursing his hand and looking at the weapons in slight fear, “According to the information I received about the weapons they are only able to be used by the owner of the weapons. When my palm was pricked the weapons gathered some of my DNA and now they only recognize me as the owner. Can I have these pistols Fred?” He nodded and found me a belt that had two holsters on them for the pistols.

I put the belt on and stuck Heaven and Hell in their holsters. Hell is on my right hip and Heaven is on my left. According to the information I received the pistols have different things that they can do. Both pistols actually have a magic formation built into the clips that use the mana in the universe to materialize fifty caliber bullets. The clip literally never runs out of ammo, it is honestly too convenient. Heaven can actually materialize blanks if I want it to and allows me to knock people out with it, Hell on the other hand lives up to its name. It will allow me to materialize bullets that will explode on impact and according to the information it is equal to the explosion from a grenade. It is honestly scary just thinking about it, both pistols will allow me to materialize regular bullets along with full metal jackets and armor piercing bullets.

Heaven actually has a few other types of bullets it can manifest as well, most of them are ones that will knock out or capture my enemies in nonlethal ways. The one that was drawing my interest now though was on called “Friendly Injection” according to the information if I shot a friendly with it the bullet had thousands of nano-bots made of mana that will go through their body and heal their injuries, the only downside was the initial pain of being shot by the bullet.

I shook my head at the absurdity of the pistols, they were just a little overpowered from an earthling’s point of view. I thanked Fred for the pistols and proceeded to look for a sniper rifle to use. After searching for a while I found a good old fifty caliber sniper rifle leaning against the wall on the racks. It was pitch black and actually came with a silence barrel, according to Fred. I was shocked that a fifty caliber sniper rifle would have a built in silencer, but I didn’t complain about it because it meant that I wouldn’t have to take the time and attach a silencer to it if I needed to. I nodded in satisfaction and had Fred engrave Purgatory on it, this completed my set of weapons at Heaven, Hell, and Purgatory. Fred found me a back holster for Purgatory and I put the sniper in its holster.

The sniper weighed quite a bit so I would need to increase my strength in order to carry it while sprinting and stuff. I could walk with it pretty easily, but trying to run would quickly drain my stamina. I thanked Fred for the weapons and spoke to him about some random stuff before I walked out of the armory. When I walked outside I looked around the grounds and I saw Sylvie talking to Daniel off in the distance. I made my way over to them; when I walked up they stopped talking and Sylvie smiled at me, “Did you pick out some decent weapons?”

I nodded my head, “Yeah I got some good ones.” Daniel looked at the sniper on my back and nodded, “That’s a pretty hefty sniper rifle there, but it should kill someone in on shot even if you miss their heart by a few inches.” His gazed floated down to the pistols at my waist and his eyes widened, “Why do you have that useless pair of pistols, quickly take them back and exchange them.” Sylvie scrunched her brows up and looked to see what Daniel was talking about, when she did her eyes got just as big, “Why did Fred give you those!? Do I need to give that old man a beating or something!?”

I smiled and shook my head, “These pistols aren’t useless to me guys.” Sylvie was still a little upset when she spoke next, “What do you mean!? Even our Jack of Spades can’t use them and he is the best gun slinger we have!” I sighed, “Follow me to the range then if you want to see them in action.” I didn’t give them time to speak and I just turned around and walked towards the range again. Sylvie and Daniel looked at each other, sighed, and followed behind me.

When we made it to the range I picked the same table that I used before and pulled out Hell. When I pulled the pistol out the other shooters on the range stopped shooting and fell quite. They all started to gather around my table and where whispering to each other. Some were calling me an idiot, while others were excited to possibly see what the pistol could do. Sylvie walked forward and started the targets up. I took aim and as soon as I did my vision turned grey and there was a black beam of light coming from the barrel of Hell.

What the fuck is going on? I searched the information, really quick, in my memory and found out that both Heaven and Hell have an aim assist function built in as well. I found out how to disable it and turned it off with a thought. That might be useful in certain situations, but I need to learn how to aim without it, otherwise I won’t get any better. As soon as my vision turned back to normal the targets started to pop up into place.

I had chosen normal fifty caliber bullets when I pulled Hell from its holster. I aimed at the head of the target and pulled the trigger. There was a loud bang and the gun bucked just a little bit, it was honestly less than I thought it would be. The bullet traveled quickly across the range and hit the target squarely in the head. The fifty caliber bullet completely removed the head of the wooden target. I did this for all of the following targets, of course I still missed a couple shots on some targets, until the last target’s head was blown off.

I sat Hell down on the table and looked at Sylvie and Daniel who were staring at the targets with widened eyes. Sylvie looked at me and spoke, “It actually fired, it actually fired.” Daniel, on the other hand, stepped forward and tried to pick Hell up. To his surprise, along with everybody else, he was unable to make the pistol budge an inch. I laughed a little bit and activated the other mode the pistols had, “Party Mode.” As soon as I issued the command Daniel was able to pick up the pistol and examine it.

Sylvie looked at the pistol in Daniel’s hand and then looked back at me before speaking, “How?” I shrugged my shoulders, “I was able to become the owner of the two pistols and as soon as I did information on what they can do and how to use them entered my brain. The pistols are linked to my DNA and can only be used by me unless I put them in Party Mode, then they are able to be used by any one, with limited functions. Now if I use the command to put them back in their other mode they become extremely heavy and unable to be used by anyone other than me.

Daniel aimed Hell at one of the stationary targets and fired the gun, it bucks a slight amount and spat fire. The bullet traveled down the range and hit the target right in the chest blowing a soccer ball sized hole in the middle. Daniel looked at the gun and was shocked at the amount of power it produced with so little kick. Usually a fifty caliber gun would almost come back and hit you in the face if you weren’t strong enough to hold it down.

I laughed and took Hell from Daniel, “Watch this.” I aimed Hell at one of the other stationary targets and switched it to the explosive rounds. Hell spat flames and the bullet flew down the range, when it hit the target this time there was an explosion and the entire target was disintegrated. I looked back at Daniel and Sylvie and they were staring at the empty space where the target used to be with their jaws on the floor. Sylvie was the first to regain her composure and speak, “That is just an absurd explosive bullet, usually an explosive bullet might cause a hole in some one the size of a basketball or a little bigger. I have never seen a pistol that can shoot an explosive bullet of this power.”

I nodded, “Yeah it is a little powerful, I won’t be using it unless I am facing an armored foe or someone really powerful. Of course, Hell also has armor piercing bullets as well so maybe not even against armored opponents.” Sylvie shook her head, “Seriously this pistol has almost all you need to kill, what about Heaven?” I put heaven back into its holster and then loaded blanks into Heaven. I aimed at Daniels thigh and before he could say anything I pulled the trigger. Daniel yelled out and then fell to the ground holding his knee. He looked at me and glared, “What the fuck are you thinking!?”

Sylvie was staring at me in shock. I smiled a little before apologizing, “Sorry, but Heaven not only will kill, but it will let me incapacitate someone. What I shot at Daniel was a blank that I had loaded into the magazine. Sorry about shooting you, but I couldn’t think of any way to show what it can do, the blank would have disintegrated when it hit the wood leaving nothing behind for you to see. Sorry again.” Daniel had a shocked look on his face before he started laughing, “Decisive, I like it. We need more people who can act instead of worrying so much.”

Seeing Daniel start to laugh everybody eased up a little and they all let go of breaths they didn’t know they were holding. Daniel stood up and messaged his leg a sec before not paying it anymore attention. The crowd started to disperse and I was talking to Daniel and Sylvie for a bit before I was met with the notification that there was outside interference and I was going to be logged out. I told Sylvie and Daniel that I was going to go back to my room for a bit, they nodded their heads and we split ways. I made it too the room and fell down in the bed before I was logged out and returned to Earth.

*Earth*

I was brought back to Earth and greeted with Cindy standing at my bedroom door with her phone pointed at me like she was taking pictures. I yawned, “What are you doing Cindy?” She smiled and pointed next to me, “You guys just look so cute together, I couldn’t help but take pictures.” I looked over to see what she was talking about and I saw Karen was lying there with her arm draped over me sleeping peacefully.

I shooed Cindy away and she snapped a few more pictures before walking out of the room smiling. I shook my head at her and looked back at Karen. She was lying there snoozing away with a smile on her face. I smiled and leaned over giving her a kiss on the lips. Her eyes snapped open and she stiffened up for a second before she relaxed and kissed me back. We laid there for a few minutes, making out for a bit. We separated after that and I smiled at Karen, “Morning sleepy head.”

She beamed a smile back at me, “Morning handsome.” I laughed a little before booping* her on the nose. *(AN: For those that don’t know what booping is type it in a google search bar.) She smiled at me and tried to bite my finger, I snatched it back and booped her again before climbing out of bed. When I crawled out of bed I finally noticed that I was naked. I looked down at myself and had to do a double take. Sure enough I was standing in the middle of my room stark naked. I looked back at Karen and noticed that she was naked too, of course her lower half was covered by the blanket.

I saw her massive twin peaks tremble a bit when she laughed at my expression. I pried my eyes up from those weapons of destruction and saw that she had a mischievous expression on her face. I squinted at her a little, “I thought you changed my clothes?” She laughed again causing those massive melons to jump, “I did change your clothes.” When she said this she looked up and down my body slightly licking her lips as she did it. Her gaze finally stopped on my lower half where she gazed at intently, her face slightly turning red.

I looked down and noticed that I was actually semi-hard I quickly turned around and covered myself, but it was too late. She laughed a little before speaking, “What’s wrong hunny? I have already seen it before.” I craned my neck towards her and glared at her, which caused her to laugh again. I turned my head away from the destructive jumping weapons of fat on her chest. I heard her get up off of the bed and walk somewhere in the room.

I didn’t know where she was going, but before I could look or ask I felt a heavenly sensation on my back, followed by a hand reaching around and behind the hands covering my junk. I felt a soft and small hand grab on to my semi-hard soldier causing it to get a little bit harder. She slowly stroked it up and down while whispering in my ear, “I haven’t got to do this yet though, among other things that I would love to try babe.” I gulped and turned towards her, “We have to go to school though.” She laughed at this and shook her head, “No we don’t, it’s already past noon and going to school now would be pointless.” I gulped a bit and just stared at her before I could say anything she squatted down. Oh, this is going to be a fun time.