I find myself back at the shore of the lake the Water Temple is in, greeting a couple diplomats and their bodyguards. When they tell me they’re ready, I walk towards the location of the temple. I get a few steps before I realize, and turn around:

“Uh, do you guys want me to levitate you over there, maybe?”

Turns out, they can’t casually just Jesus their way across water, so yes, they do.

Once we get to the surface above the entrance, I explain what’s going to happen next, then pull them closer to me so I can easily cover all of us within a sphere of air. Then we dive.

I have them walk through the barrier-portal before me and dispel the sphere, absorbing most of the air. We walk through what has come to be called the Norwegian Hall (expert level naming!), now with a couple surveillance cameras and signs saying ‘blah blah unauthorised blah blah’ in the languages of the places we know the temple connects to. The fifth wing is still silent, and Great S does not allow opening it from the ‘inside’.

The doors to the temple proper are permanently open now, with the keys having been handed to the government. I point out the doors, as that’s where my job (as stated) ends. Well, I’m pretty sure the reason they gave me the job, and not someone else, is because they had my number and I can get myself and others down here while still dry. At least, the reason given failed to convince me otherwise.

That, and I know big S, and when we get to the central plaza, which is bustling now thanks to all the Bangladeshi who moved to the temple, I do my usual ‘knocking’ by creating a great big noodle of mana and tie it off as I send it down, towards the Palace.

Just make the spell, but not anything that makes it move, and when you’re ready to send it, start tying it off while you add the part of the spell that makes it move. How did I not realize that trick earlier? It’s so simple! If the issue is that your mana can’t reach, then just make it -not- your mana.

Okay, so it’s a bit more complicated than that; as soon as you tie it off you lose all control over it, and it becomes drastically easier to dispel (point #1 + can’t supply it mana), and it’s also not exactly the easiest thing to do, but I make enchantments all the time, and that functions on the same concept.

For that matter, you can fix some of the issues by instead tying the spell to something small and physical; then you don’t have to weave the movement part and tie it off at the same time, which also means you can make sure it’s properly bound to the object and tied off.

Then you just chuck the thing, and the spell with it however you prefer to chuck shit. Humans are good at chucking shit. Even graduated from shit to the superior aerodynamic properties of rocks long ago, and then to pointy things and so forth.

Ahh, there’s my favorite armed danger noodle, a happy about my method of getting its attention as always. I wait for the diplomats to snap out of the shock of seeing the Great Serpent for the first time, then introduce the two parties. S already knew I’d bring the diplomats, having been informed as such by first me, and then the cultivator couple, who should already be down in the Palace with any parties who got here before us.

I leave it to the Great Serpent to take us down there, and the others look more and more amazed, especially when it deposits us into the Palace proper, just inside the water barrier. As expected, there’s quite a few people in the great hall, and the couple look distinctly uncomfortable among these diplomats and their aides, despite having some of the fanciest clothes (by magical/mystical properties, if nothing else). Then again, the way big S went full momma dragon on them is probably part of why.

The Norwegian delegation consists of only these two diplomats, and their bodyguards of course, a concession made since Thea and Christian are the de-facto rulers of the Water Temple, along with S, of course. Well, the other delegations also have two diplomats each, but each of those have two aides. Some of the Temple’s new disciples are helping out by placing refreshments and drinks on the tables they set up yesterday, a mishmash of whatever was available near (and could be brought through) the portals.

That’s my job done, so I’ll just-

“Hey Lars!”

Crabs.

“What?” I reply to the approaching couple.

“Where are you going?”

I was thinking of heading to iceland to explore the other world a bit.

“Why don’t you stay here?”

“Ehh, I don’t really-”

“You owe the Great Serpent a favor, right?”

Oh yeah, the favor… As previously agreed we’ve studied the merging of magic and cultivation, the magical and mystical, but in concepts and abilities, and I used a favor to convince it to let me use it as a test subject. I figured it wouldn’t be an issue, as by its own admission it was just something minor… but if having it stay and cooperate was minor, then the reverse...

Extra crabs.

So I end up staying, mostly as emotional support for Thea and Kristian, through the entire, uh, diplomacy, but thankfully I don’t actually have to do much, so I do like a few of the locals and just sit down, shut my eyes, and shift my focus to myself.

Doesn’t mean I can turn my sense off, though. While I can suppress my mana sense in various ways, and more like covering your ears with your hands than anything really effective. Well, technically I could shapeshift away the related organs, but the human mind is not made for that. Brrr.

That means I hear, see, and mana sense thing I neither need nor want to know, and I’m not sure what to think of how some of these public servants see me. At least the Norwegian delegations seems as confused as me with some of the questions about my (at best only partially true) exploits.

And I guess it’s useful for them that I am here. I offered a few opinions here and there, at first unbidden, but soon they started asking me clarifying questions and opinions even for things I have none about.

Yes, I can point out loopholes and flaws in ideas on how to handle this place. Yes, I’m fairly knowledgeable in magic and what can and can’t be done. No, I don’t know how you should handle it in a way that seems fair to all parties.

“No, no, as I said, you can’t get total control of who goes through the gates. Well, aside from just closing them from your side - they’re made of sturdy stuff.”

“What if we-”

Sigh.

I’d say “at least I’m not the only one bored/annoyed by this, but it’s the couple’s fault i’m here, so…

I give up listening to the diplomats waffle on, instead trying to gather my scattered thoughts to make a cohesive, if not exactly all-encompassing, plan.

I sense a pause in the conversation, and seize it.

“If I may.”

“First, you’re all either forgetting or ignoring the Water Temple, presented by our hosts the Great Serpent and the cul- Thea and Kristian. Second, it’s grown to the current state of being largely organically.”

“For the first, you should all come to an agreement with our hosts, instead of ignoring them. After all, even the wings of the Temple are still part of the temple, meaning that as soon as you passed the water barriers you were in their territory. So get an agreement there before you go for fancy agreements with each other.”

“For the second, it sounds to me like you don’t even know what’s most critical to your own nations, in terms of what to gain and how to handle this. I suggest getting a priority list, then get an agreement with the Temple, and handle as many of your goals as you can from that. Then you can go for a low-volume specialty equipment trade agreement or whatever.”

“Oh, and while it’s impossible to send an army through here, you can send a small group of powerful people. My own power has been judged as similar to an entire artillery battery by the military, and that was a while back. If you want control, you need the cooperation of the Great Serpent. After all, there already is a combat capable force here.”

“Aside from that, once you have an agreement with the temple you can probably get far with basic security measures. Do you really think anyone would try to send a strike team through here? One that could either sneak past or defeat the mighty dragon? Calculate risks and gains.”

The people who already looked displeased at my comments now look even more so, but it seems like I gave a few of them something to think about at least. Though they should’ve been able to come up with this on their own…

I get a particularly confused look by one person, who asks me “What’s your education?”

“Software engineer.”

He looks at me for a moment, then his expression goes from confused to ‘I don’t even know how confused I am’

“But then why are you here?”

I just point at our most gracious hosts. “Blame them.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, it’s not a problem. I was just confused, you’re, to put it bluntly, not being very diplomatic.”

I noticed, and yeah, not my job. Not that I’ll say that. There’s not being diplomatic, and then there’s being downright undiplomatic.

I don’t know if it was my frustration shining through or what, but I don’t get many questions after that, and those I get are mostly the kind I’m actually qualified to answer, so about some magic or other. And after my rant they’re actually including the Temple, too, so I get to watch the couple squirm under the attention.

Well, since I got them into that I help them out a bit, guiding them towards focusing on what I see as their primary strengths, that being their central location, and the power to at least somewhat police the gates. Both in manpower and dragonforce.

“Ugh, that was a pain in the ass.”

“Yeah. “Mhm.”

“It’s your fault, you know.”

“But it’s all over now!”

I don’t know if any actual contracts were made, but now I have to come up with an enchantment and/or inscription to identify people, or at least where they came from. I’m kinda looking forward to that, but if big S doesn’t want to cooperate I’m not trading a favor this time. Consider that a lesson learnt. At least the minor breakthrough I got from its help led to a bigger one, so it was worth it.

The couple are uh, lounging together in a pile of pillows, and are kinda handsy, so I can’t help but ask: “I know that was stressful and all, but aren’t you getting a bit close in front of someone else?”

“Why?”

“Well, you look like you’re about to relieve a lot of… frustration.”

“It’s not like you haven’t seen everything there is to see.”

“That was for science! I already told you, I don’t care if you’re exhibitionists or whatever, but I’m not into that.”

I mean, the way their energies intermingled, and how that affected the ki in the air around them was enchanting, and it’s a shame I can only indirectly sense it, but I was focusing on my mana sense, so I didn’t even realize I was looking straight at them.

“Whatever you say.” says Thea, who’s already stripping Kristian, so I just sigh and get up to leave. At least they’ve learnt to enjoy the side-effect of that technique.

“Hey Tåke, do you know what day it will be on sunday?”

“Uhm, sunday?”

“No, that’s not what I… Sunday is four days from now, but do you know what will happen on sunday? What’s so special about that day?”

She thinks deeply about it for a while, then her face lights up and she reaches an answer: “Woof!”

…

“Sigh, who taught you to answer like that?”

“Woof?”

“Yeah, yeah, it’s cute and good practice for communicating through tone and intonation, how you say things, but seriously, who taught you?”

“No one! Actually-”

She launches into a poorly narrated story with several important details left you, but in short, her pack were talking about ways to ‘say’ the sounds they make as wolves, and a nearby human asked them a question.

“She turned around-” she helpfully acts this out in a dramatic fashion, “Woof?”

“Oh, I get it. That makes a lot of sense, really…”

Of course it’s a meme. And I’m sure anthropologists and whatever they’re calling the field of studying non-human intelligence -ists would love to hear all about their culture and our influence on that.

“But back to my question, this sunday will be Upheaval day.”

“There will be another upheaval!?”

“Uh, hopefully not, but it’s the same date -the same month and day of the month- as when the Upheaval happened, or in other words, one year since the Upheaval, and some people are gonna celebrate that. Do you-”

“Are you gonna celebrate?” asks Trilli, who up until now was distracted by the rubix cube someone left in the Den.

By the looks of it she actually knows how to solve it, or at the very least she’s made a lot of progress. I think the patterns are a bit off from the usual way, though.

“Yeah, but as I was saying, do you remember what happened during the Upheaval?”

“Magic and bad weather!”

“Trilli, I was asking Tåke, and that’s not what I was referring to.”

“Oh I know, tasty round meats!”

“You mean… balls of meat?”

“Yeah, balls of meat!”

“Like… meatballs?”

“Yeah- Woof, is that what they’re called?”

“Yes, they’re called meatballs. And where did you get the meatballs from?”

“Wooo…” she ‘howls’ quietly, a tic I’ve seen in several wolfkin taking the place of ‘hmm’ or ‘ehm’ and such.

“You! It was you!”

“Ding-ding! The original Upheaval day was when I first met you and your merry band of meatball lovers. Meaning, your pack. So I figured we could celebrate and stuff.”

“Will there be cake?” asks Trilli, who clearly likes that idea.

“I hadn’t actually planned for that.”

“Whaaaaat. But you have to have cake when you celeberate! That’s what Hilde says.”

“Well I was thinking of getting a whole bunch of different kinds of meat to share with the pack, and anyone else from the Den, for that matter, but cake isn’t a bad idea.”

“Meat is better!” Tåke makes her preference known.

“Is it now? And it wasn’t a mutually exclusive thing, it wasn’t either or.”

Trilli seems to have quite the sweet tooth, and her eyes practically bulge at this revelation.

“Tåke. Drool.”

“Ah.” She wipes it on her arm.

These- sigh. It’s not really visible, so unless she complains about her fur being sticky again I’ll just leave it.

“That’s it, then. But you’re both gonna need to help me, and I will need help from as many earth-shapers as possible.”

“Oki.” “Okay!”