“Status? Sir, like I’ve already explained, you are a rush summon job for Magus Emeritus Aastor VII. If you don’t keep moving, you will be summarily Unsummoned-”

“Unsummoned? Wait, you can do that? DO THAT!”

“…Sir, I assure you, you do not want to be Unsummoned.”

“Well, of course you’d say that! You just summoned me, you wouldn’t want me to leave!”

“Unsummoning involves summarily executing you, and using you for summoning parts in other rituals.”

She gave a self-satisfied sigh, and looked smug. Priestesses aren’t supposed to look smug dammit! Whatever happened to quiet contrition? But so far, this world hadn’t particularly cared about what was supposed to happen, so I tried to take it in stride.

“…So uhh...where’s Processing Room 7 exactly?”

“Ah, apologies. The delays mean you are no longer eligible for Processing, and will be Unsummoned. Thank you for visiting Excelsia.”

“HEY WAIT A SECOND!” So turns out asking for Unsummoning was clearly a mistake, but in my defense, it had never been a real option before. Heck, it wasn’t even a guarantee that I would have civilized company to talk to when I first materialized into a world.

I must have looked stricken (which I was), because she burst out laughing. Oh, okay, so Priestesses in this place can be smug and play practical jokes. I didn’t know what religious sect she adhered to, but I was beginning to like them a little bit more.

“Hey, didn’t anyone tell you that the sign of a great practical joke is that the victim is laughing when it’s over?”

“No, but that sounds like someone who doesn’t take practical jokes very well.”

“….”

“Follow me, I’ll take you to Room 7. And if you delay me anymore, I actually will Unsummon you.”

“*Gulp*. Yes Ma’am.”

***

As we walked, I took another look at the Status. It didn't appear in front of me, exactly. More like a second screen in my mind, that I could look at while still being on some kind of auto-pilot in the real world? I couldn't do much more than follow someone or walk in a straight line or eat while reading the Status though. No intense physical activity, or monster slaying, or anything.

—————————————————————————————————————

ISEKAI HERO V2.0 Beta by XXXXXX

Beta Patch Notes:

1. Thank you for being a Beta participant! As a result of your active participation in the Beta, we have decided to give all players a Limited Time Z-Rarity Gift! Please collect yours below.

2. As the Beta progresses, we have decided to Reset all attributes and skills in order to provide a more balanced and streamlined experience. We are sorry for the inconvenience this causes, but the balancing should be a lot better now!

3. Experience Gain, Skills Gain and Ability Improvements have all been revamped! The changes will become evident as you keep playing.

If you enjoyed ISEKAI HERO V1, you’ll LOVE V2. We promise!

—————————————————————————————————————

What if I didn’t enjoy V1 though? What then?

I glanced over the notes again. There were a lot of oddities, but before I had time to really dig into them, we had arrived at Processing Room 7. Besides the ominous tone that Processing carried, the number itself made me uneasy. Seven rooms was too much for any summoning facility, no matter how big.

“Umm, what did you say this Wizard wants me for?”

“Magus Emeritus Aastor VII. And I didn’t.”

“Well, what does he want me for?”

Still nothing. Well, that didn’t bode well. On the plus side, I was definitely used to things not boding well. That much, at least, was straight out of the Isekai Template TM. Instead of answering, she just swept into the room, as though she was a regular there. Which, I suppose, she probably was. But the practiced ease that the Priestess had when she moved around…just how common were summonings in this place?

Unlike the cold stone and dim light of the summoning chamber and the hallways outside, Processing Room 7 had a clean wooden floor and large windows that let the sunlight in. No summoning symbols on the walls either, but merry fires were crackling all around the room. A large, vaulted ceiling up top had a rather grandiose mural of some old man riding on a horse. A King of some kind, probably. Or a God? Magus Emeritus Aastor VII himself?

And of course, just to complete the nightmare, there was bureaucracy. Bureaucracy and even worse, a queue. People stood in pairs as a bored clerk waved them left and right, to even more bored looking clerks who were doing the actual "processing", it seemed. The amount of magic, the logistics, the sheer scale needed to make this entire thing function- It was utterly insane. Impossible to even fathom. What kind of society has magic power on this scale and still needs to summon people from another world?

And it seemed like it was more than a world. I could see some of the natives of Grimmar, desperately panting for water. It was a forest covered world sure, but the Frogmen stuck to the beaches and the water bodies as much as possible. Two Elves from the post-apocalyptic Land of Haroun were administering first aid as best as they could, though it would be a losing battle if they didn’t get some water soon. Lovely folk, the Elves. They were tall, with ebony skin and dusky hair, soft-spoken, and very, very helpful. When I first met one, she almost cut off her arm when I asked her for a hand. Very kind, but not a great grasp of idioms.

Almost everyone I saw looked somewhat uncomfortable, except for some small, furry looking things that I couldn’t quite place. I hadn’t ever encountered them, but they looked a lot like tiny, fuzzy toruses that chirped a lot and seemed to be very content in cages. I had no idea why they’d been summoned, other than possibly as pets. Or food.

Species from different worlds though! I had only rarely run into anyone who even knew that different worlds existed, let alone anyone who had actually come from one. Most Summoned heroes were brought in for a specific purpose. If they succeeded, you didn’t need another. If they failed, they died. It was simple enough, and meant that so-called Isekai Heroes didn’t often meet each other in the line of duty.

Although, very clearly, none of us here was meant to be a Hero. That was still the burning question, and I wasn’t sure if I was going to get any answers before I met the Magus who had called me in for a “Rush Job”.

Before I could try and see if there was any other species I recognized, maybe someone who recognized me, we had arrived at our designated paper pusher, eyes barely open, sucking on a pencil and sitting on a small wooden desk that looked like it might topple over with papers. Though I will say, if papercuts were going to be the main source of danger around here, I wouldn’t complain very much. I’ve had papercuts before. I’ve also had very large lizards sink their teeth into my abdomen. I know which one I prefer.

“Name?” The clerk was a small man, in what looked liked sackcloth robes. Brown, at the very least, with his wiry hair cut into a fringe. He could have passed for a child had his face not been bearing a large, drooping walrus mustache.

“Bla-” I began, before I was rudely interrupted.

“Assistant Summoner Maria Vandemar, Section C.”

Always nice to know the name of my kidnapper, I guess. Maybe she would have given it to me herself if I’d asked, so maybe I was the rude one here, but somehow, I doubted it.

“Summon?”

“Rush Summon 1173-C. Male, early twenties, no other specifications given.”

“Given Name?”

I kept quiet, until I was elbowed by Maria. Guess that was me.

“Blanc, Legendary Hero of Twelve Worlds, Champion of-”

“Blanc, got it.”

Hours, spent in front of a mirror, practicing that spiel! Hours! I had the pose down perfectly, hands on my hips, and yes, the lack of Golden Armor was really throwing a bit of a wrench into the Awe-Factor of the monologue, but still. Hours! Let me finish my Cool Isekai introduction, you Friar Tuck looking-

“Put your hands here.” He got out a glowing, purple ball, and waited patiently. He seemed so incredibly distant, so weary, I almost felt a sense of solidarity with him. Workers Solidarity! We were both just trying to get through the day, right? I bit back my annoyance and took a look at the device he was pointing to.

I didn't have the best relationship with glowing, purple balls. Nothing had gone my way so far, but if past experience was any indication, this was supposed to measure my magical potential. And every single time someone tried to do that, bad things happened. Electrical malfunctions, exploding crystal balls, an ancient Shaman keeling over from a heart attack (don’t use old people to measure unknown sources of magic kids!). This was all if past experience was any indication, and it was a big if at that.

“Okay, sure, but maybe you could find some cover? Under the desk or something?”

I was prepared to argue, getting into a conversation on the merits of safety, but thankfully, the man took my advice. Which shouldn’t have surprised me, since this place was running like a well-oiled machine. Honestly, I would have been somewhat shocked if they didn’t get the basic rundown on heeding cryptic warnings from recent Summons, rush job or not. It didn’t take him very long to put up a little bubble around himself. I looked over at Maria, and she had a dark green glow all around her body. No idea what that was about, but there were plenty of mysteries to resolve without trying to find out what every two-bit piece of magic that was being cast in a ten mile radius was.

I placed my hands on the purple ball and flinched instinctively. It was a habit borne out of years of experience. Magical strength assessment = Magical Ka-Boom! No exceptions.

The ball glowed once.

The ball glowed twice.

I waited in anticipation. My gut told me that this is where things would go wrong. Any second now….

Any second…

The ball glowed thrice. The pulsing faded entirely.

Oh. Well, that was disappointi-

The ball exploded.

Because of course it exploded right after my guard was down. And as the shards of crystal began to shoot out, I realized that nobody had bothered to cover me with a shield. Typical. Well, maybe the System would take pity on me and give me extra XP for being blind, some sort of hidden Achievement or Unlockable Hard Mode.

As I was lamenting my tragic fate ("Oh he was so young, the inhumanity!"), my mind slowly began to realize that something was wrong. The chunks of the crystal ball were frozen in mid-air. And not in the overly dramatic “Not a second too soon!” style. The ball had barely begun to break apart, had moved maybe a couple inches, before it simply stopped, as if frozen in time.

Frozen in time.

Temporal Rewind. Or at least, something like it! It was clearly high level magic. Either that, or time magic was somehow common in this world, and if that was the case, I was going to ask Maria to Unsummon me, pronto. So, assuming it was Temporal Rewind, it was difficult magic, S-Tier according to Isekai Hero V1.9. I had managed to learn it a long time ago, but it normally took a lifetime to master, especially at this level of fine control.

Which meant….

I nearly headbutted the desk as I bowed, and spoke in the most polite tone I could muster.

“Pleased to meet you, Magus.”

The only sound I heard in response was a wheezy chuckle.