《Binary Progression》Volume 2 - Chapter 15: Trollin
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XPhaxX walked through the capital city of Arlepia, three massive concentric rings of walls protected the various districts of the city.
Though "shuffled" would be a better description of how he walked, a miserable journey through the streets.
A red cape over black, baggy trousers and a white tunic.
His hair was short with some bangs in the front, it was a bright red colour, not ginger, red.
"I've tried everything..."
He pushed a small frogman away as he walked.
"I tried puns, I tried planting traps, exploiting spells, giving poor direction... but nothing worked..."
He took a turn to the left and down to what looked like a ghetto of the town, dilapidated buildings, no guards and the exchange of faction-banned goods.
The roads went from pretty cobblestone to dirt, mud and blood.
"No matter what I do... I CAN'T TROLL ANYONE!"
He stood outside what looked like a patched-up ruin of a building, grey walls with wooden boards covering holes and in some places sheets of paper or fabric covering other holes. The roof was intact, surprisingly, though it was overgrown with moss and vines.
'XPhaxX's Trolling Buisness' read the sign above.
He opened the door and inside stood an armoured human, with blond hair and a ponytail.
Durlln: Hey, I'm here to request a "trolling"
XPhaxX had to read over the text multiple times before accepting that someone actually came to the shithole of an establishment.
If he expected a client he would have cleaned up.
"STAY PROFESSIONAL! SHOW NO WEAKNESS!"
XPhaxX: Of course, though, my schedule is almost full...
Durlln: Oh, I see, I'll be back some other time then.
XPhaxX: DON'T LEAVE ME, DURLIN!
Durlln: O-ok...
XPhaxX breathed a sigh of relief.
He moved to the other side of the wooden desk, trudging through piles of discarded armour, toys, expired items he wasn't bothered to throw out and whatnot.
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He sat down on the leather chair he found somewhere a few months back.
Durlln: What a charming establishment...
XPhaxX: Yeah, I was about to throw those out. he explained he explained pointing at the trash.
XPhaxX: So, what can I help you with?
Durlln: You see, me and a "close friend" are doing this "RP thing", all I need you to do is "troll" my "friend" in two hours.
Durlln used the /wink emote about twelve times in a row.
XPhaxX: That's exactly my area of expertise!
He replied with a /wink out of politeness.
Durlln: I can tell, the armour and weapons littering the ground, the secluded building, it was a dead giveaway. he said while doing the /laugh emote.
XPhaxX ignored the rude comment about the trash on his ground.
XPhaxX: Anyway, where can I find your friend?
Durlln: My "friend" will be "pretending" to be the ambassador for the Kearudown faction.
"There is no need to highlight the important words with quotation marks, I can read..."
"Guess I'll reply with the quotation marks too, I can't lose my only customer in months..."
XPhaxX: That's "perfect"! Do you have any "specific method" you'd like?
Durlln inspected the statement for a lot longer than XPhaxX though, he assumed he was lagging.
Durlln: Something that'll stop him from coming ever again!
XPhaxX: Castration? he replied awaiting laugher.
A silence filled the room, it was long and uncomfortable, at this point XPhaxX hoped it was lag.
Durlln: I'll pay you 20 gold up-front, and 20 after the job.
XPhaxX: DEAL!
With that, Durlln extended a hand for XPhaxX to shake which he did.
After accepting the twenty gold XPhaxX rushed out of the building leaving Durlln confused but also strangely amazed by XPhaxX's enthusiasm.
"This is it! The day I finally get a chance to start the business for real!"
He was running towards a multi-story building in the distance, tall pillars held up the angular roof.
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Massive colourful windows were displayed on the walls.
He practically kicked the door down as he called out: XPhaxX: FOXLY!
As expected across from the door stood XxFoxlyxX amongst a crowd of other people, most, already used to this happening.
XPhaxX: FOXLY! I GOT A JOB!
No reply came for a while.
The fancy, white-walled room with tiled floors and crates of expensive items for sale and purchase, it was an auction house, a place usually characteristic by the noise of people arguing, bidding, or starting a fight because someone sold the herbs you collected for two hours for one copper less than your price.
All the players were busy looking at the auction-interface, but to everyone else, it looked like they were just staring off into space.
XxFoxlyxX: ...alright... good for you...
XPhaxX: You don't believe me...
XxFoxlyxX: I mean, it's not that we don't believe you... but...
Another player took it upon themselves to complete XxFoxlyxX's statement.
Kevin: But, you live in what looks and smells like a crack-den and have a record of not one actual customer.
XxFoxlyxX: Essentially.
XPhaxX: AND HERE I THOUGH I HAD SOME FRIENDS IN THIS AUCTION HOUSE!
XxFoxlyxX: As your friends, we are obligated to let you know when you are talking out of your a#*.
The conversation was once again interrupted by Kevin.
Kevin: Which one of you bas#*rds bought all the mossback kidneys!?
Quietly XxFoxlyxX chucked to himself without admitting guilt.
XPhaxX: I CAME HERE TO SHARE THIS SPECIAL MOMENT WITH YOU PEOPLE AND YOU DO THIS?!
XxFoxlyxX: Your imagination has nothing to do with me buying the kidneys.
Kevin: So you're the hoe who bought them?!
XxFoxlyxX: It's just business! he shrugged.
XxFoxlyxX: I'll sell them back in Kearudown for a nice profit!
Kevin: At least give me a few! I need them!
XxFoxlyxX crossed his arms, XxFoxlyxX: I guess I could trade you a few...
Kevin: ... Knowing it wouldn't be that easy, Kevin waited for XxFoxlyxX to say what he wanted.
XxFoxlyxX: In return for a cryptfiends left ass cheek.
Kevin: YOU KNOW THAT'S A STUPIDLY RARE FROP!
XxFoxlyxX: BRIGN ME THE ASS CHEEK, KEVIN!
A silent stand-off took place as Kevin reached for syringe looking weapon at his waist (which was technically classified as a poisonous short-sword) as XxFoxlyxX summoned explosive runes and kept them suspended in the air.
The other people rushed out of the auction house leaving only the trio.
XxFoxly, Kevin and XPhaxX.
That's when an idea popped into foxly's mind.
XxFoxlyxX: Alright, alright!
Kevin: ?
XxFoxlyxX: If you go with XPhaxX and record his "trolling" for the rest of us to see, I will hand over 20 kidneys.
Another moment of silence passed.
Kevin: So, just to be clear, I follow XPhaxX, record his screw up and get kidneys?
XxFoxlyxX: Exactly!
XPhaxX: NO NEED TO BE SO BLUNT ABOUT IT!
Kevin: Fiiiiiiiiine...
XxFoxlyxX shot XPhaxX a thumbs-up.
XPhaxX: Don't act like you did this out of kindness...
XxFoxlyxX: Anyway, I have to go now, the whole guild mess is really draining my business-time.
Kevin: Yeah, didn't you say you guild-leader quit?
XxFoxlyxX: Something like that, we know he's online because he's on our friends-list, but that's about it.
XPhaxX: Maybe he started a new guild?
XxFoxlyxX: He's probably getting his ass beat by boars in some starter-zone. We'll track him down soon enough. he shrugged before turning to leave.
XPhaxX: Alright, let's go, Kevin...
Kevin followed him silently.
A private message came to Kevin from XxFoxlyxX.
XxFoxlyxX: Make sure to record everything!
Kevin: Oh, I will...
With that, XPhaxX and Kevin headed out to purchase some supplies before getting to the "trolling".
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