It was dark and cold.

The sky was clear and thousands of stars lit up the sky.

The cobblestone they stood on was wet and covered in mud.

"I... I don't know how I feel about this..." Felix admitted.

"Don't worry, man! It fits you!" Alex assured him, he was hiding behind a barrel in the corner of the alley.

"Why couldn't Bromy or Dylan do this?!" Felix asked.

"Dylan looks too... masculine and I wouldn't risk telling Bromy to do this!" Alex exclaimed.

"Besides, Dylan's been out doing who knows what..." Alex shrugged.

Felix was ordered to put on a dress in hopes of attracting the killer and giving Alex the chance to kill him.

It was a light green colour and excessively frilly.

He even got a blond wig and a parasol to go with the outfit.

He got some rough makeup too.

"..." Felix's face was solid red.

"But this is too embarrassing!" he cried.

"Shh! Somebody's coming!" Alex shushed him as he ducked behind the barrels.

"What the hell!? I'm the killer, of course I won't run into the killer!" Felix thought.

"Hey there, you shouldn't be walking around the alleys at night! It's dangerous!" Dylan exclaimed walking up to Felix who just recognised his voice.

Dylan squinted his eyes as he inspected Felix.

"Wait... do I know you from somewhere?" he asked.

Alex had to hold his breath to stop himself from laughing.

Realising it was Dylan, Felix put on a high-pitched voice.

"A-ah! You're right! Let me just-" Felix spun around on his heel and began heading out.

"Hold on! Where are you going? I'll make sure you get back home safely!" Dylan said with a smile.

"That's it! Nothing's better for PR than helping a damsel in distress!" Dylan thought.

"I'm Dylan, by the way!" he exclaimed.

"Oh - that's really nice of you... but... ehhh... I'll be fine!" Felix tried leaving but his arm was grabbed by Dylan.

"No, I insist!"

"No, no, I'm fine!" Felix assured him.

"Come on! Stop resisting!" Dylan pleaded.

"Come on! Just let me help you and tell all your friends how great of a leader I am!" Dylan thought.

"Let me go!"

"Is he trying to fucking molest me?!"

"I mean, I'm a murderer but even I never went THAT far!"

"HELP!" Felix cried as Dylan felt a shiver run down his spine.

"Wait, if people see this... they might get the wrong-" Dylan's thoughts were interrupted by Felix' cries.

"HELP, RAPIST!" Felix exclaimed.

"FUCK!" Dylan cried.

"No, I-" he let go of Felix causing him to fall backwards and smash his head on the ground.

The last thing he saw as his consciousness faded was Alex, passed out with his hands cupped over his mouth in hopes of stopping himself from laughing.

He woke up a few minutes later, he was being carried by Dylan.

"Wa gha fhaach?!" (What the fuck) he demanded realising his mouth was gagged with a cloth.

"What the fuck!?" he thought.

"Hey, are you up, miss?" Dylan asked.

"Yeh... Agh ahmm" (Yes, I am)

"Alright, you were really loud so I had to gag you so people don't get the wrong idea! Sorry about that!" Dylan exclaimed.

"OH, BECAUSE THIS LOOKS PERFECTLY WHOLESOME, DIPSHIT!" Felix thought as he started wriggling away, that's when he realised his arms were tied up, so were his legs.

"Sorry about the rope! I didn't want you to get in the way of my saving!"

Felix produced a string of complaints as he thrust forward, causing Dylan to fall to the ground.

Sensing his opportunity, Felix charged forward, moving like a caterpillar, forming an arch from his torso and then flattening his body.

He made it a decent five meters before he felt his neck being pulled back by Dylan.

"I WILL SAVE YOU WOMAN!" he cried as he began crawling toward Felix.

"AUGGHHHHHHHHHHH!" Felix let out a muffled cry of fear as Dylan pounced onto him like a Lion does onto antelope.

They engaged in a struggle as Dylan lay atop Felix placing his head in a chokehold and resisting being thrown off as if he was riding a mechanical bull.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Felix cried again.

"YOU WERE SO MUCH EASIER TO DO [good deeds to] WHEN YOU WERE PASSED OUT!" Dylan cried as he realised he wasn't standing in the moonlight, beside him stood an open door from which poured out a stream of light as a family of five looked at him through the open door, their faces painted into an expression of judgement.

"EEK!" Dylan cried as Felix gained an upper hand in the struggle and began crawling away.

"HOLD ON!" Dylan jumped onto Felix who was still trying to escape, he picked up the pace, travelling at the speed of a racehorse as he burned through more calories than the continent of Africa consumes in a year, still moving like a caterpillar with ropes for reigns.

During the high-speed ride, Felix was continuously being bumped up and down, his butt being beaten relentlessly by Felix's back.

They circled the city multiple times as they drew near the place they originally ran across each other.

"I have to find Alex! He'll explain the situation to Dylan."

Meanwhile, Alex just woke up, he looked around seeing no sign of Felix.

"Shit! I lost track of him!" he thought.

"Is Felix ok? Last I saw him... he was getting hit on by Dylan..." Alex couldn't help but grin.

"I doubt that relationship will go very far!" he laughed.

Suddenly, Alex heard Dylan scream from a few houses over.

"SLOW DOWN, MY ASS HURTS!" Dylan cried.

Alex's expression darkened as his mouth opened in shock.

"I... never realised they... were..." he put a hand over his mouth.

"Oh god... I hope Felix didn't misunderstand me meeting up and going out to the play with him!" Alex thought as he wiped the sweat off his forehead.

"I need to go talk to him!" Alex thought as he began running towards the source of the sound.

Meanwhile, Felix was still on the run as he came across a set of stone stairs, he made it down the first few before he came across the greatest obstacle, gravity.

They fell down landing in a small, tightly packed alleyway-crossroad with a small tree growing in the centre.

Growls came from all around them as Felix and Dylan looked around and saw dozens of angry looking eyes that glowed in the dark.

"...I'm going to die here..." Felix thought as he looked at the snarling beasts that left the dark alleys around them.

As they drew nearer, Dylan let out and annoyed cry.

"I'm sorry, miss... Looks like I fucked up again..." he sighed sadly.

Felix was too busy trying to break free to listen to Dylan, he managed to move the rope from his arms and torso up to his shoulders as he felt it...

Dylan tossed his end of the rope over the thick tree branch above and began pulling it up, lifting Felix safely out of reach of the snarling dogs.

He tied the rope to the base of the tree.

"I'll come to get you with a few more people when I respawn!" he said with a thumbs-up as he was swarmed by the dogs.

Meanwhile, Felix's wriggling didn't pay off, because the rope now became loose and wandered up from his chest and towards his neck.

"No no no no no no!" he began screaming, less afraid and more pissed off.

Suddenly he heard the familiar voice of Alex.

He looked over, ready to be saved from his unfair death only to see Alex was standing on a nearby rooftop, with his hands over his eyes.

"L-look, I just wanted to make sure... we're on the same page here..." Alex began.

"SAVE ME DUMBASS!"

"I like you a lot as a friend... nothing else!"

"LOOK HERE! LOOK OVER HERE!"

"So, yeah... that's all I wanted to say..." Alex said, he felt a weight lift off his chest,

"...Are you even here? It's so quiet..." he removed his hand from his eyes and saw Felix, dead, hanging by the neck from a tree.

"..."

"Shit"