《Binary Progression》Volume 8 - Chapter 18: Clowning around
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"I just want to take this opportunity to express how much I despise you people..." Jasper whispered from the back of the cart.
Jasper wore clown make-up as well as a colourful clown costume.
They rode with the long chain of carts belonging to a sub-section of the artists guild which set up plays and circuses around the world.
The group, and by the group I mean RuRet, agreed to work for the circus for a day or two while they laid low and hoped that Cardilax guy forgets about them.
RuRet shrugged, he said he could swallow swords and stuff.
"Aw, don't be like that, I'm glad you guys managed to sneak out of prison without me having to try and fail to break you guys out!" he exclaimed.
"Is the dragon guy really that strong?" Jasper asked.
RuRet nodded.
"Well, for comparison, imagine you're an ant."
"Are you aware of what an anteater is?"
Jasper nodded.
"Yeah, well, he's the dragon that burned both the ant and the anteater!" he clarified.
The cart rode along a long, winding dirt road leading through the plains and towards the oversized land that was high par.
Jasper looked over to Zack who looked depressed.
"What's wrong with him?" Jasper asked.
RuRet patted Zack on the shoulder.
"Well, when we went out to do the deal with the circus while you were in the bathroom, they just started laughing at Zachary and instantly accepted him into the circus."
"What!? Why?" Jasper asked before seeing Zack jump off his seat.
"EXACTLY! WHY!?"
"WHAT DID I DO!?"
He looked down to his feet.
"They just started pointing fingers and laughing..."
"There is something deeply disturbing about being laughed at by a clown..." he said in a hushed tone that reeked of existential dread.
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Jasper narrowed his eyes, not ready to tackle the can of worms that was Zack's self-confidence after being laughed at by the circus.
"Whatever..." he hissed.
An hour later the group was engaged in a tree-player game of charades.
"Are you... a helicopter...?" RuRet asked uncertainly.
"YES!" Jasper cried out.
"I QUIT! I DON'T WANT TO PLAY THIS GAME ANYMORE!"
RuRet clicked his tongue, dawning a disappointed expression.
"B-but I didn't get a go yet..."
He looked down to his feet.
Jasper gritted his teeth.
"AND WHO'S FAULT IS IT THAT MY TURN LASTED AN HOUR!?" he demanded.
"It's because Zachary didn't participate..." RuRet argued.
"He's got his own mid-life crisis going on, don't shift the blame!" Jasper replied.
"I LITERALLY SPUN MY HANDS ABOVE MY HEAD!"
"MY FIRST TIP WAS: 'IT CAN FLY'"
"And I gue-" RuRet began but was cut off.
Jasper lunged forward, holding the fishman by the collar.
"YOU GUESSED SEAGULL!"
"HOW?"
"WHY?"
He leaned in closer.
"RuRet you find me a fucking seagull with a propeller right fucking now or so help be Lorb I will shank you..." he whispered through gritted teeth.
RuRet gently yet firmly removed Jasper's hands from himself.
"I think you have some anger problems..." RuRet remarked, dawning a sympathetic smile.
"I'M LITERALLY A MURDERER!" he yelled.
Realizing what he just said, Jasper cleared his throat.
"I- I mean..."
"I... once kill-" he was cut off by somebody from a different cart.
"Don't sweat it, buddy. I cooked meth on the first day we got here!" another clown called out.
"Yeah and I allegedly had relations with a corpse."
"I placed the allegations!" another voice called out.
"And I was the corpse!" another exclaimed.
Jasper turned towards the others.
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"I don't think... we should let these people entertain children..." he remarked wryly.
RuRet shrugged.
"Eh, let them follow their dreams."
A while later, the carts stopped at a small town right on the border of Highpar and the rolling plains.
"Alright, let's go set up the tent!" exclaimed one of the people in the cart at the very front.
Everybody including the trio got off and started unpacking the carts.
The large rolled-up sheets which made up the giant circus tent were brought out and unrolled before being strung up on the long, wooden poles.
The large wooden benches were rolled inside while tickets were sold at the town.
"I can't believe I'm actually the clown..." Jasper muttered, wearing the large green wig.
"I know, living the high-life eh?" laughed the other, fatter clown, smoking a collection of all sorts of alchemy reagents.
"I'm going to stab him..."
"I'm going to do it for real..."
When the two were finally called out, they entered the circus tent with easily fifty people in it... it was just a small town after all.
"How is everybody tonight?" the clown asked in a raspy tone.
"YEAH!"
"Whoo!"
As well as all sorts of cheering came from the audience.
"THAT ISN'T A FUCKIGN ANSWER!" he screamed back, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a bottle before shattering it on the nearby wooden support beam and stepping towards the audience.
Seeing the slaughter that was about to take place, Jasper restrained the clown.
"R-RELAX, DIPSHIT!" Jasper hissed, tackling the man to the ground.
The crowd erupted into laughter as the fatter clown threw Jasper off and onto the ground where his nose honked upon impact.
"AH!"
Quickly he got up to his feet as the clown charged at him again.
"COME HERE YA FUCKEN-...!" he was cut off by Jasper who picked up one of the props, a chair, and tossed it directly at him.
"SNAP OUT OF IT!"
Jasper stepped back he was completely unarmed as the other clown slowly started to get up, a streak of blood seeping out of the corner of his mouth.
More cheering.
"SHUT YOUR FUCKING TRAPS YOU - YOU - BUNCH OF CHROMOSOME DEFICIENT POTATOES!"
RuRet and Zack both watched the performance from a bench near the entrance.
"He's good at this!" RuRet remarked, eating a handful of popcorn.
Zack was still lamenting his lack of self-confidence.
"HELP ME! SOMEBODY GIVE ME A DAMN WEAPON!" Jasper demanded, holding onto the clown by the neck as he ran around, trying to throw him off.
"This is more of a colosseum than a circus..." Celerious remarked, sitting at one of the benches, eating a small cloud of cotton candy off a stick.
"More like a dogfight..." Cabbege_san remarked.
"Oi," the wolfman that was Celerious growled.
"You know that's not what I mean..." he replied.
"SHUT UP GUYS, YOU'RE MISSING THE FIGHT!" Redpancake exclaimed.
"GOT YOU!" the fatter clown exclaimed, pulling Jasper off and lifting him against the support beam.
A series of honks could be heard as Jasper lost a tooth or two before being tossed aside.
"Alright, shit-stains..."
He reached into his pocket and pulled out several small baggies of blue crystals before tossing them into the crowd.
"Enjoy your souvenir, ask for Tonny if you want more..." he slurred before grabbing Jasper by the foot and dragging him out of the tent.
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