All the competitors that reached the second round have gathered here. There are considerably less left than I expected. ...Did our monster killing spree leave them none to hunt? Never mind that, it's what comes next that I'm concerned with.

Three grim druids with typical long beards and their trademark sickles have an announcement. Depending on how well they fell for my ruse, it could be either the contents of the next round, or signal for all the other teams to fall on the murderous murderers in their midst. I try not to touch my long braid every second, while Celica whistles offbeat and Azara nervously jerks her gaze every which way.

Before dawn there was huge ruckus when the scene of carnage that I had carefully laid out was discovered. Guards naturally questioned us, what with our tent being right next to the murder scene. However, Celica started spinning a graphic recollection of just what kind of activity supposedly kept us too busy to notice little things like murder right next door... next tent flap... whatever. And knowing Celica... well, let's just say that they seemed to buy her bluff - at the low low price of all three of us being considered complete deviants.

And now in the morning all the guards, who are flanking us competitors, stare at our trio with unreadable expressions. Are those eyes of someone looking at murderers who reposition corpses into lewd poses, or at 'sisters' who are not just into incest-lesbian-threesomes but also into several other acts Celica described in loving detail that I don't even have names for? ...At this point I'm unsure which would be worse. But hey, at least they don't know we are demons too--

"As everyone knows, the empire has kept on summoning demons into our world. And some of these unholy abominations have made their way right here, to our lands..."

Oh shit...! My grip on my swordstaff is almost hard enough to snap it's shaft.

"...to the swamplands north of here, to be exact."

So misleading!

"Thus, the second round shall be a demon hunt! Find them, and cleanse the land of their evil!"

Ahaha... I pump my fist with the rest of the competitors. Yes, let's hunt all the evil demons (present company excluded)! Pheww.

After listening to details of this round, we ready to make our way there. The swampland, where demons - presumably deserters from one or another imperial military campaign to joyride through the continent - hide, is not that far. I opt for walking there, since flying would definitely be seen by others making their way to same destination.

As we follow a forest trail that only a generous soul would call a road, I ask about one caveat this mission has.

"So... what are chances we'll start a millennia lasting feud with this?"

While it's not final, demons are not known for their restraint and forgiveness, and therefore putting them out of circulation for century or two might not be the best way to make friends.

"Hmmm~. Who knows~?"

Okay, that was useless. I turn to Azara.

"As long as it's not a pride demon, it's likely not that big of a deal. This'd be nothing personal, after all."

"Okay. Thank you."

Well, I guess demon society would have devolved into constant backstabbing and feuding by now otherwise. Instead it is, if not exactly civilized, then at least reasonably functional.

"Been a long time since Celica~ fought another demon~. Brings memories~."

She seems to reminisce about something.

"Why'd you end up fighting?"

"'Twas nothing special~..."

Azara joins in.

"Oh! You mean that Erzsébet incident?"

"Never mind that~..."

While Celica somewhy seems reluctant, Azara clearly is anxiously waiting for me to ask more. Fine, I'll ask. It's not like I have anything better to do right now.

"'Erzsébet incident'?"

"She was famous back four centuries ago! Offed many rivaling succubi and other lust demons... and not just kill-kill, but mutilated them too. Such wonderful envy she had!"

A murderous envy-lust demon with weird name? Lovely.

"Sounds like a winning personality."

"She was slain by that demon lord before I met her, so I can't say more. It's weird though... I'd have thought that she'd have reformed by now. Demons don't just permanently die."

'Demons don't just permanently die.' Hmmm. Wait a minute... It can't be...!

"Hey... What'd she look like, this succubus?"

"Huh? Oh, I heard she had--"

"Look look~! Those stones look like a giant butt~!"

Celica energetically interrupts Azara's answer by pointing at a pair of rocks that... well, they certainly bear uncanny resemblance to ass-cheeks, complete with dirt pouring out of it...

"--Pffft!"

"...Haah. What the hell Celica?"

Azara can't help but snigger, and I didn't fare much better. This was so completely, absolutely stupid that my previous train of thought didn't so much get derail as it was completely atomized. Thanks a lot Celica.

"It must be wonderfully blissful in the world seen through your eyes..."

"Tehe~."

***

We ran all the way to the swamplands, making it well before the rest of competing teams. It would be different if clanspeople used horses, but they all seem to agree that horse works best well-grilled and lightly salted. Now all we need is to find the demons and deal with them.

I take a look at the area. For a swampland this is bit dry, with only few fetid pools of water littered among the lush, thick mats of moss and groups of short, stunted pines. I wonder why demons would even come here - it's not like there's anything that would interest them in here. Maybe they have been harried by druids and took temporary refuge?

"Will you sniff them out with your improbable sense of smell again?"

"Nah~, too much decomposing stuff~ to spot theirs~."

"Sigh. Where'd they hide at anyway? There's nothing to hide in except those pools of stinking-- Wait a minute..."

There was a shiver in otherwise calm surface of the water. Am I getting jumpy? Surely even demons wouldn't--

"SHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!"

If I hadn't been looking at just there, the monster leaping at me from the stagnant swamp water would have landed a heavy hit. That, and him stupidly signaling his attack with a shout allowed me to reflexively make a leap that would have won me any gymnastics competition and dodge the attack.

Pointing my swordstaff towards the swamp-monster covered in soiled plants, I notice that another one had apparently attempted to ambush Celica, and is currently doubled down in pain while Celica is kicking him repeatedly. ...Meanwhile Azara looks bit disappointed no-one deigned to see her as a credible threat.

The creature from Black Lagoon looks at me for a moment, then shakes off the lumps of plantlife and several liters of water off of him, revealing the demon underneath.

"You guys are demons too? Woah. I have never seen so crummy looking succubi."

The demon who says this annoying thing is huge like an ogre, but is otherwise very human-like, except for the single horn protruding from his forehead. He's wearing a filthy, decrepit armor covered in many spikes, and his expression manages to look at the same time bored and combative.

"For your information, this is part of a disguise. A very thorough disguise."

"I see. Your skill at looking thoroughly mediocre is impressive then."

Is he trying to piss me off?

"Let me guess... You're demon of sloth and wrath?"

"Let me guess... You're demon of crumminess and stating the obvious?"

Yeah. Figures. Hybrid sloth & wrath equals passive-aggressiveness. ...This will be pain in the ass.

Our exchange is interrupted by loud cries of Celica's victim. He seems like some kind of wingless imp, and would probably give an impression of a wicked trickster, were he not currently pathetically crawling away from Celica, who is stomping him with her boot.

"Celica, stop tormenting the poor bastard. Let's talk with them first."

"Fine fine~."

She reluctantly backs off of the small demon, who was half-submerged in the moss by now.

"Yeah, thanks for asking my input too guys..."

Azara grumbles while I face the demon duo.

"What are you two doing here?"

"Why don't you mind your own business? If you have any."

Yeah, just what I expected of him. I turn to the gremlin-thing for an answer.

"Yeah, what he said! Fuck off ugly bitches!"

"Celica, feel free to tap dance all over him."

"Iiiih! Ourpreviouscontractwithawizardwasdullsowequit!!!"

Unlike what druids said, they aren't leftovers from empire's wars then. But really, they broke a contract for stupid reason like that? I thought breaking contracts is a big no-no, but I guess demons are same as humans there; if there's a taboo, then there's always someone willing to break it. No exceptions. ...Well, as long as it doesn't involve me, I don't care if they don't care.

"As for our business, we happen to need proof that we have slain the demons here..."

They instantly ready for battle, but I continue before it escalates.

"...however, if you donate your ears, that should be enough to fool the druids."

"Eh~? We're not killing them~?"

"..."

Celica is bit disappointed and Azara is still sulking because no-one has paid any attention to her. If the two demons agree to it, I get what we needed without fight and they can lay low for a day and avoid the bunch of demon hunters following us here.

The gremlin and ogre whisper for a moment, and then reach a consensus.

"It sucks more than succubus with a straw, but if it gets those druids out of our skin..."

"I'm gonna grow it back right tomorrow!"

Hooray, peace through other people's self-mutilation.

As they cut off their ears with surprising stoicism, Azara bends to whisper me.

"(Oi. What's your game here? The druids asked for a whole head as proof in this round.)"

Hmmm...

Hmmmmmmm...

"(...Oops.)"

I didn't pay attention back then, since the guards were staring, but now that she mentioned it... This is just great. Getting them to disfigure themselves and then killing them anyway... I'm going to be hounded by vengeful demons forever, am I not?

"(Well, doesn't matter. They are from another demon lord's domain in hell anyway.)"

That makes it okay?! Ugh.

"Well, are you taking them or what?"

The two demons already sawed off their left ears, and are handling them to me. ...Maybe I should play this off as a joke? Yeah, humor will ensure there are no hard feelings.

"Now, take your ears and sauté them in a light garlic sauce, and you have a tasty dish."

".........What."

"Eh?"

Delivered with complete dead-pan for effect. The two of them are less than amused though - their expressions are getting darker every second.

...This will end badly, won't it?