Seconds after selecting Login, I found myself floating in a void. Well, floating would be the wrong word. So would standing, I guess. I was just there. “Hello, sir, and welcome to The Realms.” Oh, a disembodied voice was there too. It was also coming from all directions and shaking every molecule in my body. Well, it wasn’t my body.

It was my avatar in FIVR: Full Immersion Virtual Reality. In hindsight, other companies and games were really half-assing the Full Immersion part of that.

Up till now, FIVR games just meant you could move your character with your body and see, hear, and sometimes even feel what your character felt. The last part required haptic feedback suits designed for it. Of course, this was just some light pressure or something when you got hit with a sword. The Realms were supposed to be the next level. Sending and receiving signals wirelessly to connect directly to your brain through special headsets. Apparently this level turned out to be the “have a panic attack” level because that’s exactly what I was doing.

The voice apparently knew that I was full-on freaking out, because it suddenly made itself a body. Funnily enough, it was the body of an older Englishman in a very dignified suit. Well, as dignified as a suit can look floating in the vast nothingness we were presently in.

Oh I hope I get to name him. There’s no way I can NOT call him Alfred, right? I thought to myself.

“You do get to name me, sir. Alfred is perfectly suitable.” he managed to respond inside my head.

AH! came the involuntary and entirely non-masculine response.

“Oh, I’m terribly sorry for alarming you, sir.” came the response from Alfred, clearly apologetic. “I can hear surface level thoughts thanks to your connection to the system, so I felt it appropriate to respond. It is the ideal method of communication with me.”

And you are? I asked, only freaking out slightly less than before.

“Your Guide, sir.” he responded, clarifying absolutely nothing at all.

Great! How about you guide me somewhere other than this fucking place!

“Right away, sir.”

Even as he spoke the void found shape and color at last. After a few moments of swirling and stretching, the visual nonsense settled into what I had to admit was a very cozy office. I was almost immediately put at ease as I took in the entire experience of the room.

“Now, sir, we shall create your character and begin your adventures in The Realms?”

The Realms, designed and created solely by one Dr. Gary Hyzen. Dr. Hyzen claimed he’d created a digital world players could live in with the help of specially designed VR helmets that created the aforementioned mental link that caused my previous panic attack. Like I said, putting the shit companies put out before this up against The Realms was like a kid’s shitty baking soda volcano compared to a cold fusion reactor. This game was beyond what we knew.

Of course, assholes who made a career out of theorizing about shit they didn’t understand got on TV and got paid to say stupid shit like “Can we even call this a game anymore?” Dr. Hyzen was, without a doubt, a genius.

Unfortunately, no game company in the world would agree to publish it. It was TOO immersive. During Alpha, more than 50% of players who died in dungeons logged out at respawn, refusing to log back in. Beta Testing showed slightly better numbers thanks to a gradual implementation of senses, but it was still too high for the bean counters.

Apparently full immersion and experiencing a game as if it were real are fantastic when you can feel the weight of the sword in your hand as you swing, hear the wind whipping by as you ride on a griffon, or feel the slow buildup of heat in your arms as you begin throwing fireballs.

Turns out the average gamer thought all of that was cool as shit until they were on the receiving end of it. Dr. Hyzen responded by saying that players should gladly experience such things as they were the price for partaking in such innovation and those that refused showed a weakness of character.

In layman’s terms: Gamers should stop being such pansies and nut up so they could play this game. Dr. Hyzen was, without a doubt, an asshole.

Thankfully for the good doctor’s bottom line, his expertise went beyond the computer knowledge required for the development of the organic AI systems, sensory immersion, and world generation that went into the creation of The Realms. He was also a mathematical genius who was able to develop the most efficient, secure, and widely used cryptocurrency the world had ever seen.

It was secure, absolutely uncrackable, and could be made traceable for legitimate business transactions or anonymous for more delicate purchases. Within a few years of introduction, it had become all but universal currency. Nearly every developed country on the planet had accepted it as a more stable alternative to a national currency. All stood to benefit as each lost the ability to manipulate currency values for their own gain, but also recognized that they were now protected from other countries doing the same.

This infuriated Dr. Hyzen to no end considering the currency was a side project for him and his real love was always The Realm. Angry that the world had become enamored with what he considered the results of a “trivial algorithm” he decided to bury the code adding to the blockchain of the currency inside the game.

Essentially, this meant that there was a code in the game generating more of his cryptocurrency in a “chain.” That chain was tied directly to the in-game currency. Welcome to the New Gold Standard, am I right?

When he announced that he’d spent his considerable wealth on self-publishing this game and that the creation of new units were intrinsically a part of it, the global market nearly crashed. That’s right -he nearly brought the world into another Great Depression so people would play his fucking game. Dr. Hyzen was, without a doubt, the biggest asshole on Earth.

While he could have likely single-handedly ended world hunger (or at least put a considerable dent in it) he decided to use it to make people play his fucking video game? Although, realizing that the game presented an opportunity for me to provide for myself and my family quickly quelled the righteous indignation swelling inside me. My family had never been wealthy. In fact we were always hovering right above poor. The desperation caused by never having quite enough money to get by comfortably, combined with my impulsive nature and flexible moral fiber, eventually led me to doing some work on the side that was, well, less than legal.

Oh, and of course I got caught. Well, technically I wasn’t caught so much as confessed. Plea deals are devilishly enticing. It didn’t matter. There’s no background check during character creation (I hope). And it wasn’t like I was devoting myself to philanthropic endeavors.

Without the opportunity to attend college and a criminal record that guaranteed I would never be able to get a decent paying job on my own. The Realm offered a way to change all of that, once I borrowed a significant amount of money from a loan shark I knew from my more unsavory days.

Oops.

“First things first, sir.” he began. “You must decide on a race for your character. As you can see from the list before you, all ‘classic’ races are represented, as well as a few less traditional ones.”

Sure enough, Humans, Elves of all kinds, Dwarves, Halflings, Gnomes, and Orcs were all there, as well as a few I didn’t see as often, like Cat-people, Lizard people, and some type of Fairy. Further down were all manner of half breed creatures mixing and matching the various races in as many ways as made sense (No lizard/cat people, for better or worse).

Gnome was tempting, but I didn’t know if I wanted to be stuck as one long term. I don’t think I could go from six-foot plus in real life to, well, that. All the other races showed some sort of bonuses to vision, resistances, skills, and things of that nature.

What benefit do Humans get? I asked, wondering how humans would keep up with some of these bonuses.

“Yes, sir. Humans receive a third Major Trait during character creation, whereas other races receive only two.” came Alfred’s response.

What exactly are traits, then? I asked. Traits could be different things in different games, so I wanted to make sure I knew what they were here.

“Traits are special characteristics that permanently boost your character in some way. They can affect stats, skills, and even core mechanics of how characters function.” he explained. “They are broken up into Major, Medium, and Minor, based on the magnitude of the change, with Major providing the largest changes.”

Oh I definitely like that. Human it is. I emphatically confirmed.

“Very good, sir. Now let us select your class from one of the base classes available.” Alfred continued. “Please keep in mind that these are only your base class, but there are multiple specializations called Jobs available as you play. Whereas your class is a general guideline for growth and abilities, Jobs are concentrations in specific fighting styles, crafts, schools of magic, et cetera.”

With that, the four classes appeared in a list before me.

Fighter-+3 STR/+2VIT/+1 END Weapon and Defensive skills do not count towards maximum skill levels

Mage-+3 INT/+2 WILL/+1 AGI Increased mana growth and regeneration and increased learn speed for spells

Priest-+3 WILL/+2 INT/+1 VIT Access to special spells and specializations via their selected patron deity

Rogue-+3 AGI/+2 INT/+1 END Learn and improve skills at an increased rate

Alfred, what exactly do the stats mean in this game? I asked. Sometimes, I wished there was some sort of standard regarding game stats.

“Allow me to show you, sir.” he replied as a screen appeared in my vision displaying Stats and definitions.

Strength- Affects max. lift weight, carry weight, and damage for STR-based weapons

Agility-Affects movement, speed, dodge, parry, and damage for AGI-based weapons

Vitality- Affects Hit Points and resistance to certain types of damage

Intellect-Affects Mana Points, Spell Damage, Maximum Skill Levels, and Maximum Spell Levels

Willpower-Affects Mana Point regeneration, resistance to certain magics, and increases effectiveness of Priest spells

Endurance-Affects Stamina Points and regeneration of Stamina and Health

Well, the Rogue has me sold with the skill learning speed, honestly. I really want to pick up as many ways to get gold as I can. Mage would be cool, but they’re always weak at lower levels, take a fair amount of effort to be effective, and I need to start making money ASAP.

Rogue it is, Alfred.

“Very well, sir. In addition to the listed attribute growth,” he went on to explain, “you will also receive five bonus attribute points per level as a human. You receive your first five at level two. Non-Humans have less freedom in these stats as two to three are pre-determined.

“Our next step is is selecting your Traits.” he continued. “As I mentioned earlier, these are permanent changes to your character. You will receive an additional trait of your choosing during this section.”

As the new menu appeared, my eyes were assaulted with an impressive list of Traits and their descriptions. Some of these were insane! Everything from unique abilities gained only through the trait to various changes to your class or race. Even some affecting skill and stat growth.

Alfred, can you filter these for me? I asked of my new digital friend. Looking at all of them at once was just too much.

“Yes, sir. However you wish.”

Great. To start, just show me the traits that affect skill growth.

Without another word from Alfred, a lot of the traits disappeared. Most of what remained increased learn speed in certain fields, but it was all a bit specific. Things like “Increase learning speed for weapon skills” or “Start the game with X skills at Level 5.” These were some pretty pedestrian options. I wanted something bigger.

That’s when I saw Master of None.

Master of None: Double Effective Intellect for Skills (Double Skill Level Limit), but Half Effective Intellect for Spells (Half Spell Level Limit. Includes Schools of Magic)

Now this was interesting. I could pick up all sorts of skills like this! Nothing like diversifying the old portfolio, eh?

OK, then I want Master of None as my first Trait.

“Very good, sir. What shall you take second?”

Is there a trait that boosts my Intellect?

“Yes, sir. Superior Intellect grants an additional three points of Intellect per Class level.”

OK that’s perfect for my second trait. No clue where the third one should go. I admitted. While the first two

“Sir, if I may suggest something. There is a trait called Smarter Not Harder that will negate MP increases from Intellect, but grant 2.5 SP per Intellect instead. As you have stated you have no interest in magic and are already increasing your Intellect gains, this would be a very good fit for your build.”

Wow that does sound perfect, Alfred! OK, that’s my last trait, right? What’s next?

“Next, let us find you a good starting location. Based on your starting character, I would recommend the border city Gnometheran. It sits inside Gnomish country near the border with Human lands.”

Well, Gnomes would be able to teach me some interesting skills I’m sure. I’m sure I could make money selling Gnomish inventions I build once I get to Human settlements.

Sounds good, Alfred. You’re the guide. I said.

“Very good, sir. Now, what name shall you take in The Realms?“ Alfred asked, his question catching me off guard.

I always struggled with this part in the past, always wanting a good “fantasy” name that fit the world and hated the guys that always had “420” or “xtreme” somewhere in their name, especially on RP servers, but this was different.

This wasn’t just a game or a role-play. This game would become my job. It could become my life. Not to mention, it was a way out of the shithole of a life my family and I had lived. I wanted something I’d be able to live with and go by.

I looked back over my character sheet and made my decision the instant my eyes landed on the Master of None trait. It was cheesy and I loved it.

You can call me Jack.

Jack Alltrades.

Name Jack Alltrades Class Rogue Level 1 HP100 MP100SP148 Strength 11 Agility 13 Vitality 10 Intellect 15 Willpower 10 Endurance 11