《A Fool fooling around in another world》Blow up and die real people!
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*stab*
"Oh?" (Me)
"W-What is it?" (Lydia)
"That... That fucking hurts." (Me)
"WHAT DID YOU EXPECT IF YOU STAB YOURSELF IN THE CHEST WITH A SMOLDERING KNIFE?!" (Lydia)
"To be honest... I thought it would just be over in a flash and that's it. Wow, that fucking hurts a lot." (Me)
"H-How do you feel?" (Lydia)
"What the fuck kinda question is that?! I have a bloody knife stuck in my chest. I'm feeling fucking glorious if I had to say, thanks for asking." (Me)
"Sarcastic prick." (Lydia)
I move the knife in a circle around my heart to create the base of the magic circle.
"Yes, interesting." (Me)
"W-What is it this time?" (Lydia)
"Well, nothing really, but can you do me a solid?" (Me)
"Yes?" (Lydia)
"Please pull the knife out of my chest if I faint." (Me)
"I really think you should stop this." (Lydia)
'Screeny? Why are my protagonist powers not activating right now? I thought that I should be able to endure this, but damn.'
Don't know. MAYBE BECAUSE IT'S NOT NORMAL FOR AN MC TO STAB HIMSELF WITH A SMOLDERING KNIFE?!
'It's not?'
Most certainly fucking not. By the way, aren't you way too calm right now?
'If I would freak out right now, then I wouldn't be able to concentrate on drawing the magic circle and that would result in it failing. Believe me, I don't want to go through this again.'
Only after 5 minutes, the magic circle is finally finished. I heal the wound until only a scar remains. A scar with the form of a complex magic circle.
"So?" (Lydia)
"Hm?" (Me)
"What does the magic circle do? Or did you do it without a plan like always?" (Lydia)
"Bitch, I always have a plan. And this magic circle should speed up my training progress by 5 times." (Me)
"Excuse me?" (Lydia)
What?
I beg your pardon?
"What are y'all so surprised about?" (Me)
Of course I knew what they were so surprised about.
"Can... can you do the same to me then? I mean if we all get-" (Lydia)
"No." (Me)
"WHY?!" (Lydia)
"I would have to put scars on your body and a maidens skin should be unblemished." (Me)
"YOU CAN'T JUST TAKE THAT AS A-" (Lydia)
"There's also the fact that you would probably die due to mana poisoning, since you would have way too much inside you, but I think that the first point is more important." (Me)
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"In what way is the first point more important?" (Lydia)
'I can't really tell her that I can still fuck her perfectly mantained body then, can I?'
Do it fagget
"It's more important in my way." (Me)
"*Sigh* You're ridiculous." (Lydia)
"I'm awesome and you know it." (Me)
I cut the second magic circle in the middle of my belly. This time it's not as painful as before, since I'm already used to it, but it still hurts like shit.
''Alright, 2 out of 3 magic circles are finished. I'll safe the last one for a circle which will be a bit more diffcult and I don't meet the requirements for it yet." (Me)
"And what does the second do?" (Lydia)
"I could tell you, but you know... I don't want to." (Me)
"WHY?!" (Lydia)
With me training the other girls and additionally abusing my "Space of distorted time" like it's my very first fleshlight, 4 months passed-
"YOU CAN'T JUST IGNORE ME?!" (Lydia)
"Watch me." (Me)
-and the day of the tournament arrived.
STATUS
STATS
Level: 231 Statpoints: 110
HP: 100 MP: 8878 HP REGEN: 0.40/sec MP REGEN: 0.70/sec
STR: 40 DEX: 121 END: 40 INT: 70 WIS: 70 CHR: 50 LCK: 40
ABILITIES
ACTIVE: Space of distorted Time; Lightning step (shortcut: clap); Raygun (shortcut: pointed finger); Enhance (shortcut: slap desired part of body); Lightning clad (shortcut: touch both shoulders diagonally) ; Blink (shortcut: flick); Higher Heal (shortcut: Touch target with pinky and thumb); Search life (shortcut: touch temples) ; Embed Lightning (shortcut: tap weapon of choice twice); Connect Lightning (shortcut: lock fingers); Cure Disease (shortcut: Point pinky at target); Cure higher Curse (shortcut: point ringfinger at target); Counter (Auto); Warphole (shortcut: twist your wrist); Invisibility (shortcut: Cross arms); Spacial cut (shortcut: swing of arm); Intermediate Gravity control (shortcut: stomp with your foot); Analyzing Eyes; Space Prison (Shortcut: Cup hands); Spacial Domain (Shortcut: Grab forearm); Mirage (Shortcut: Touch thumbs)
PASSIVE: Perfect Body control; Extreme Magic potential (Gift from God); Perfect language comprehension; Inventory; Shortcut; Twin Dagger Mastery (100%); Throwing Knives Mastery (100%); Higher Throwing Knives Mastery (13%); High understanding of Magic circles; Spacial Perception; Higher Twin Dagger mastery (12%); Teamwork;
AFFINITIES: Lightning (99,99%); Life (50%); Space (63,30%);
TITLES
The one who made God vomit
You're fucking ridiculous
Nightmare of the magic Forest
Master of the Harem
Potential ???
CONTRACTS
Unnamed (Threeheaded Lionchicken)
Magic Circles
1. Increase of trainingspeed (5x)
2. Censored for surprise effect
3. Unused
'Ain't gonna say nothing about all that. The same as always: Some mysteries surfaced and I became even more awesome.'
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Oi, your job as the MC is to elaborate on all that! What are you even getting paid for?!
'EXCEPT THAT I'M NOT!'
"Ladies, we've trained 4 months for this! Blood, tears and sweat were shed, only to prepare us for what's to come! But the time has not come yet, for first, we have to get to the arena, which is at the border of the human kingdo-" (Me)
"What are you talking about? We're standing right in front of it!" (Lydia)
'Huh... so we're just gonna skip the journey to the arena then? Alright.'
I look at the huge arena. It's built like the colosseum in Rome, just completely red for some reason.
'This looks like something is saying "YOU CAN'T BUILD THIS BUILDING HERE!" or something like that.'
This ain't no game
"Let's get in I gue- JESUS CHRIST ON A MOTORBIKE! WHAT THE FUCK?!" (Me)
Just as I was about to go in with my team, I encounter my arch-nemesis. It's the most despicable kind of human in the whole world, which shouldn't even exist in my opinion.
"How about we get into our room later and then we have a little fun, Hajime?" (Lady with serious tits... I mean like they must be at least E Cup... damn)
"NOOOO! You're not allowed to do that!" (Another girl... I want the tits back)
"I... want him for myself too..." (Quiet girl)
Up until now it would've been alright, but what came next was a fucking attack to all men.
"Hahahaha... you guys really like to tease me, huh?" (That fucking dense protagonist guy, I think Hajime was his name)
'SCREENY!'
FUCKING KILL HIM
"Oh? Are you guys perhaps also participants of the tournament?" (That fucking dense protagonist guy, I think Hajime was his name)
'My god, he even likes to start conversations with strangers! I FUCKING HATE HIM ALREADY!'
"Wait! Before you say anything, answer me one question!" (Me)
"Euuhh... alright?" (That fucking dense protagonist guy, I think Hajime was his name)
"What kind of relationship do you personally think you have with all those women around you?" (Me)
"We are all friends, right?" (That fucking dense protagonist guy, I think Hajime was his name)
He turns around to his own harem of 5 girls. His blonde hair flutters around and his blue eyes let out an honest vibe. The armour he's wearing makes metallic sounds, which just shows how heavy it is.
'Why the fuck is he wearing a heavy plated armour to a wizard tournament?!'
"We... are the best of friends!" (That girl who came after the one with the big tits)
"I wouldn't mind a bit more though, fufu." (Titty-lady)
"Are you actually trying to make me vomit?" (Me)
"Haha, you're pretty funny! My name is Hajime! Hajime Hiiro!" (Hajime)
'Christ, he even has a name straight out of a light novel!'
Hajime offers me his hand. It looks surprisingly bulky, even if you take his armour into consideration.
"You have 2 choices right now. Either you reveal that you are not a dense protagonist, or you die. It's as simple as that." (Me)
"What do you mean by "dense protagonist"?" (Hajime)
"Second choice taken!" (Me)
I pull my knives out of my inventory and prepare myself for my first human kill in a while, but Aline immediately stops me.
"You idiot! You mustn't attack him! If you hurt someone outside of the arena, then we'll be disqualified!" (Aline)
'Of course I can't. In what world would I be able to kill when I want to?!'
"Haha! You're weird, but I like that! What's your name?" (Hajime)
"Why should I tell my name to scum like-" (Me)
"His name is Yu. Yu Krifta." (Lydia)
"I will end you." (Me)
"Well then, Yu, I hope we won't fight too early on in the tournament!" (Hajime)
'Please God, I want to rip his useless balls out! Give me the opportunity as soon as possible!'
I see Hajime leave and finally Aline lets me go from her ridiculously strong grip.
"I'm slowly regretting that I made you able to get so strong." (Me)
"God damnit, how dare she touch him so crudely. I only need 5 seconds to cut both her hands off. I wonder what would happen if I did that at night?" (Janna)
"Janna, stop mumbling death threats again. You're scaring Aline." (Me)
"I-I-I-I'm not scared! Why would I be scared?! YOU'RE SCARED!" (Aline)
"You're not very convincing when your knees are trembling, Aline. But I guess that just adds to your charm." (Me)
"WHA- WHAT CHARM, YOU IDIOT?!" (Aline)
"Exactly that charm. Now then, I guess it's about time for the "Tournament Arc" to start!" (Me)
I turn to the colosseum and look at its full glory.
You should have just killed him
'God fucking damnit, I know.'
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