Once again, I'm completely surrounded by darkness.

'Hm? What's this? Don't tell me I've been transported to another realm again?! Come on, it's getting old after about 30 times.'

"YOU STUPID SOW *hic* HOW DARE YOU TALK TO ME LIKE *hic* THAT?!" (Dad)

'Oh nevermind, it's one of those again.'

"STOP! IT HURTS!" (Mom)

"PLEASE STOP HURTING HER DADDY!" (Me)

'Damn, these dreams won't leave me alone even in this world, huh?'

In front of my eyes I see my mother lying on the ground with my father raising his hand at her. Her nose seems to have already been broken and there are a few additional bruises on her face and arms, but he still won't stop. The 4 year old me at that time always just stood there, but that was the first time I wanted to help my mother.

"DON'T TOUCH ME YOU SHITTY BRAT *hic*. DO YOU DISRESPECT ME NOW TOO?! *hic* " (Dad)

'So this time it's the meltdown after he was fired? I remember how he came through our door and reeked of the usual cheap alcohol... Oh, now comes the best part!'

*SLAP!*

'BOOM BITCH! Shit, I still feel that slap, even now. That hurt like shit.'

The dream slowly collapses and another scene comes up.

'What is this? Some kind of flashback? Fuck, I don't need this. I've experienced all this shit myself. It's like watching a movie repeatedly. After a while it gets boring you know?'

In this scene I'm with my big sister and my big brother in the kitchen. My mother didn't come home the day she wanted to come back from her trip, which was weird since she called us the day before and said that she would most likely come back before we woke up.

"Mom is in ER right now." (Sister)

"..." (Me)

"What?" (Brother)

'Ah yes, the usual "What did you just say? I can't believe that." what. Truly a masterpiece under the stupid routines.'

My sister's face is already full of tears, while me and my brother just stare in disbelieve.

"The friend she was driving with fell asleep at the wheel at 150 km/h. Mom's seatbelt broke and she flew out of the windshield. The doctor said that she maybe won't be able to walk anymore." (Sister)

About 15 minutes later, we get a phone call. It was our aunt who checked up on my father, since he wasn't answering any of our calls.

"Dad died." (Sister)

My brother finally also breaks out into tears and hugs my sister. After staring at them for about 5 minutes, the 15 year old me at that time leaves the room without a word.

'Oh yes, now begins the cringe. Can't believe I would break over something as simple as that.'

That 15 year old me sits there silently inside his dark room. Slowly you could hear chuckling coming out of his mouth.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" (Me)

'Now that I think about it, that was the first time I laughed about something that wholeheartedly. Fun times.'

As I think about those times, the laughing of the 15 year old me dies down and he turns to me.

'Oh, this is the first time that this happened. How thrilling!'

"It will soon be my turn. Prepare yourself." (???)

The dark space collapses and I wake up.

My eyes slowly open.

"Fucking great. Now I have another voice inside of my head. Not that I already have a fucking screen who's always an asshole and a chicken who doesn't seem to do shit, but now some kind of dark entity, who's edgy as fuck and foreshadows immenent doom, talks shit. What should be his name this time? How about Jim? Sounds like a good name to me." (Me)

I notice someone on the bed moving.

"Yu? What are you talking about? What do you mean by "voices"?" (Lydia)

"Okay that's it. EVERYONE WAKE UP!" (Me)

Everyone jumps up, surprised at me suddenly shouting.

"Everyone awake? Good. I'm going to tell y'all something." (Me)

You don't plan to...

'Fuck yeah. I'm planning to tell them about you.'

DON'T!

'Why? Is there some kind of rule which doesn't allow me to do that?'

No, but I want to surprise them when I somehow get a body. You know, then they'll be all like "WOAH! WHO'S THAT?!" and I'll be like "I'm the best friend of your beloved Yu!" and then they'll be all fascinated and hook me up with some of their friends and then-

"You guys know how I sometimes space out or talk to myself, right?" (Me)

Y u do dis

"Yeah. I already thought how weird that is." (Aline)

"And you also know how I sometimes talk about voices inside of my head?" (Me)

"Yeah, but I always thought that that was just a joke..." (Lydia)

"Well... it isn't. For example: Lydia? Do you still remember the chicken I tamed inside the dungeon?" (Me)

"You mean the legendary threeheaded griffon? Yes, I do remember." (Lydia)

"No, officialy it's a chicken and that's one of the voices. Then I have another cunt inside of my head. Say hi Screeny." (Me)

Hi

"Screeny says hi." (Me)

"And who is Screeny?" (Janna)

"He's part of the system of this world and also part of an omniscient being of this universe. But y'all don't have to be intimidated. He's just an asshole who gets jealous easily." (Me)

You know... fuck you

'Can't refute that, huh?'

"Wait, so there's someone who knows more about you than me?" (Janna)

"He probably knows more about me than I do, so don't be bothered by it." (Me)

"Wait, that's a whole lot to take in at once." (Lydia)

"Belka likes more fwiends!" (Belka)

"To think that my future husband has voices inside his head... But that doesn't change my love for him." (Aline)

'Aww, Aline's so cute. What a shame that I can't respond to that while the others are here.'

I look forward to how she'll be in the future

'Stop setting deathflags.'

"Well, so these two are the most major voices in my head. Any questions?" (Me)

"Major?" (Lydia)

"No? Good." (Me)

"Wait, I have one!" (Aline)

"Yes?" (Me)

"Since it seems like you tamed the beast, you should be able to summon it right?" (Aline)

"..." (Me)

'I haven't done that until now, right?'

No, you didn't, master

'Huh...'

"Yeah... I think I can do that..." (Me)

'How do I do that again?'

You just have to think about it, master

'I knew that.'

As I think about summoning the chicken, a blinding light fills our room. When the light faded, I see that in front of our bed appeared something, or rather someone.

"Good to finally see you again, master." (Chicken)

In front of our bed is a blonde haired beauty with... formidable assets. And with formidable assets I mean KAPOW! Even the headmaster is nothing against her. Her breasts are easily G-Cup and her hips look fit to give birth to quadruplets easily. But her most outstanding feature would be that yellow wings sprout from her back, making her look similar to an angel.

'But where did she get those clothes from?'

I've chosen to materialize this white one-piece dress since it seemingly fits your desires, master

'Oh... don't tell me... you can see ALL my desires.

I've only reached up to the tentac-

'THAT'S FAR ENOUGH! YOU DON'T GO ANY FURTHER THAN THAT!'

As you wish, master

"So this is the legendary threeheaded griffon?" (Aline)

'I'm so gonna fuck that bird.'

You just talked to the bird, so you are aware of her hearing that, aren't you?

'Hehe.'

... (Authors note: Those dots are from the chicken. Can't really differentiate it, if there are only dots...)

"Tch. Another rival." (Janna)

*Knock Knock*

"Who's there?" (Me)

You wanted to make that joke for a while, didn't you?

(Authors Note: WHY AM I LAUGHING SO MUCH ABOUT THAT?!)

I will that the chicken disappears and the guest who knocked comes in.

"Master, I'm here for the daily report." (Prime minister, who's now my bitch)

"Right, let me get ready for a second." (Me)

"That... that was the Prime minister of our kingdom, wasn't it." (Lydia)

"Yep." (Me)

"And he called you master." (Lydia)

"Wow, it's like we didn't just see that happen a few seconds ago." (Me)

I put on my pants and go to the door.

"He's as ridiculous as always." (Lydia)

"Yeah." (Aline)

I close the door and turn to the kneeling Prime minister.

'I've done a good job in training him.'

"So? What is it today?" (Me)

"Yes. As you've predicted, their opinion about you worsens, espescially since you declined our offer a second time. They are now starting to take measures against you." (Prime minister)

"Do you know what they're trying to do?" (Me)

"Regrettably not. They're starting to distrust me as well, so I can't get as much information anymore." (Prime minister)

"Well, doesn't matter, since I've started to make my move, too." (Me)

"Your move, master?" (Prime minister)

"Not telling. Who knows, maybe you'll betray me as well?" (Me)

The prime minister flinches a bit, showing that I've hit a sore spot.

'He really needs to work on his calmness.'

"You're dismissed." (Me)

"Yes!" (Prime minister)

The prime minister leaves and I stay in the hallway.

Is it really okay to let him leave just like that?

'Do you think I would let him live, if it wasn't? He still has his part to do.'

"Now then, I guess our third fight is soon starting, isn't it?" (Me)

Little did I know, that that fight wouldn't be as easy as it should have been.

"Well, now I know. Thanks for telling." (Me)

No problem mate.