Back in town, the group made plans to meet for dinner and split up. Arn and Pepper headed back to the inn to bathe; Keana and Sar headed to Silver Tongue’s shop; and Val, after cursing their laziness, headed to the tannery with both the devil dog and the dire bear hide.

The group trickled into the Jungle’s Heart an hour later to find Arn eating a slab of roast beef. Arn wiped his chin and said, “hey don’t look at me like that, regeneration makes me crazy hungry. Two arms and what, four or five kidneys, means two dinners, all right? So how did it go Val?”

Val brightened. “Well enough I think. One gold, eighty silver for the hide, and 9 more for the devil dog. I tried to negotiate, started to say we really needed more. The owner, Ulan, claps me on the back and says, ‘yes, yes, well all need more. I need four whores and six apprentices, all with agile fingers. But we make do, yes? I do not negotiate.’”

Arn observed, “I could do with three, but four seems a bit excessive.” Keana elbowed Arn in the side. “You can’t even handle one Arn.” Arn rubbed his ribs in mock discomfort, “be good Keana. Lot of girls out there that would go wild for a bone flute.” Keana rolled her eyes, and Sar interjected. “Actually Arn, you should let me burn that for you. A piece of your bone falls into the wrong hands, that’s worse than hair or blood, you’ll be a puppet right off.”

Arn’s jaw dropped and he dug the bone out of his pack. “Damn, didn’t think of that. Thanks Sar.” Sar patted Arn on the back. “No problem buddy. We can train your fire resistance up after dinner if you like as well. A little . . . training always helps me sleep.” Arn nodded, but begged off. “Definitely need to level it up a bit more before you get fireball, but I was actually thinking of asking Val for help with my pathetic swordsmanship.”

Pepper snorted. “That’s great. Truly. Maybe we can roast mellows and tell bedtime stories after. But it might be nice to, oh I don’t know, hear HOW MUCH GOLD WE MADE.” Keana shrugged, “not much to tell. Apparently smiling Silver Tongue doesn’t actually love everyone after all. We got directions to Hera, the town herbalist/alchemist and resident ‘bitter old crone’ for the White Kiss, and he told us that if we really had to sell the gem heart, the ‘scumbag’ Croyd would give me a half decent deal provided I wear something less bloody and flirt a bit.”

Keana snapped her fingers. “Oops, forgot the claws and teeth. Well, we mostly got a lecture. Apparently, the claws are too short and curved for daggers, and a dire bear’s teeth are meant for grinding bones and just aren’t pointy enough to make into arrowheads without major work. Can’t believe you didn’t know that Arn! Anyway, gave us eight silver, claimed he was doing us a favor. But hey, one gold ninety-seven silver ain’t bad.”

Val nodded. “Not bad at all. And, forgot to mention it, but Arn gets a hat at cost.”

Pepper grunted. “That’s just great. Maybe we can get you some brown bear underwear too so you can irritate the shit out of every damn kind of bear.”

* * *

The next morning Arn headed to the herbalist in a fine mood. Keana hadn’t remotely appreciated it when he mentioned the vomiting and urged her to “make it up to him” – and the girl was truly frightening when angry – but in the end he put his high constitution to good use. Off to get gold, lunch with the team to split the loot, maybe buy some upgrades, and then train with Val.

Arn knocked on the door of the herbalist’s tiny run down shack and was frustrated to get no answer. Arn knocked again, more loudly. “Hello!”

An ancient wizened woman, presumably Hera, came around the corner of the house and poked him with a stick. “I’m old, not deaf fool!” Arn stammered, “yes, of course, I’m sorry. I’m Arn, a low-ranked herbalist. It’s a pleasure to meet you. We hope to be farming the jungle for quite a while, and I’m hoping you’ll have some guidance for me on what to look for. I have Asir’s guide, but the opportunity to talk to real . . .”

Hera sidled up to Arn, put her hand on his chest and looked up into his eyes. “Your looking to butter me up big boy, there are better ways than words. Actual butter for one.” At Arn’s horrified expression she cackled madly, “ha! Love doing that to the young bucks! I turned all the boys' heads back in the day. Most of the girls too! But it has been a while since anyone bought my beauty products to be sure.”

Trying to recover his equilibrium, Arn tried to make small talk. “I bet you did! Let me guess, Silver Tongue is a scorned suitor?” Hera started cackling madly, which turned into a fit of hacking coughing. “Damn, too old to laugh like that, but it was worth it! No, I fell for his honeyed words like the rest. Only difference, I didn’t take to being played the fool too well. He did more itching and scratching that summer than courting, but that was sixty years ago! Man can hold a grudge!” Hera started cackling again, but it no longer seemed off putting. Hera was fun; Arn decided he liked her.

They chatted for a while, and Hera taught him quite a bit that wasn’t in his book, showing him the jungle herbs on hand in her tiny shop, and discussing things that he might find for her. When Arn pulled out the White Kiss, she “ooh’d” appreciatively. “I haven’t seen this in a long time! Rare, takes sharp eyes to spot, and not many willing to risk fighting blade apes in the trees.” Arn was taken aback by his apparent blunder, but supposed it worked out in the end. “What can you give me for it Hera?”

Hera paused, and looked at Arn intently. “Well, since you’ve been a sweetie, I’ll help you make an elixir, sell you an enchanted vial to preserve it, and you can sell it in any of the big cities. People don’t come to me because their town has the plague you understand. If you really want to cash it in now, I’ll have to ship it out, I can give you seventy silver.” Arn nodded. “We’re a new team unfortunately. Who knows what the future holds, everyone needs gear and all that. Seventy silver would be wonderful. Thank you for the information as well.”

* * *

Chimes sounded as Keana entered the enchanter’s shop. A burly guard stood in the corner, and glass cases filled with items of all kinds lined the walls. Behind the center case stood a stunningly beautiful young woman, who looked Keana up and down and frowned. “Can I help you?” she asked in a shrill nasally voice.

Keana’s anger at the haughty woman’s demeanor faded, and she struggled not to laugh. Keana raised her voice a bit, aiming to carry to the back room. “I have a gem heart to sell; was told to ask for Master Croyd.” The woman’s expression soured further, but turned to an evil little smile. “He isn’t expected back anytime soon I’m afraid, but I can give you top dollar of course.”

Keana smiled. Lets play bitch. She put the fist-sized gem on the counter and said, “well we don’t really have to negotiate. We’re headed to Siena, and I know we can get eighty silver there. The boys want to buy a few things now though, so I can take seventy-five.”

The woman sneered at Keana. “I’m afraid you are mistaken. The gem is relatively large, but very low grade, good only for explosives. I can only give you forty.”

Keana marveled at the bizarre caricature of a woman before her. An actual sneer. Well, time for my big play! “Oh…that’s unfortunate. I didn’t want to bother him you understand, I know he is busy, but my uncle insisted that I have dinner with his old friend. Said that Croyd would love to show me around town. Maybe he’ll help me out as a favor to my uncle. Maybe I can even charm him a bit.”

The woman turned red and looked about ready to burst a blood vessel. Keana struggled to contain her laughter. This just gets better and better. I’ve seen that look on drunk men, but never on a knockout like her. She’s no more than quarter real.

The angry beauty struggled to master her self, and forced out a concession through clenched teeth. “Well for the niece of an old friend, perhaps he would do fifty-five. I can’t go higher than that. If you want to try and . . . earn . . . some extra coin charming Master Croyd, you’re welcome to do that. I’m sure he’d love to hear all about your uncle.”

Touché bitch, touché. Silver Tongue said we wouldn’t get more than sixty, so fifty-five will do.

* * *

Arn ate herb and bacon stuffed chicken breast and tried to ignore the endless bitching and moaning. Elder Dannis couldn’t cook, and chicken breast that wasn’t burned – never mind stuffed full of bacony goodness – should have been a treat.

Arn thumped the table. “Enough! Sixty silver for a day’s work! A day! We aren’t going to bitch and moan because Pepper fired two pricey arrows on a flipping nightmare that weighed more than the lot of us! We are reimbursing her for that, and that’s that. You don’t like it, walk. Oh and ... um, my firestone too!”

Arn looked at each of the group in turn. “Tomorrow is another day.”