In hindsight, Evan wasn’t sure his little improvised taunting of Kinzie could be considered a success. Actually, he was pretty sure it completely backfired on him. Just as he came to that conclusion, she started yanking on his hair again, searching for signs of the supposed surgery he had gone through. “I can’t believe you have an honest to god man-machine interface implanted into your brainstem! There’s no scar, no incision marks, nothing!” She darted off into the kitchen.

Yea, definitely backfired. Evan thought to himself dryly. Then she burst back into the room with a knife she had liberated from the block on Jason’s counter. “No!” Evan leaped out of his chair and snatched it up to ward her off with it. “Put the knife back! I am not okay with being vivisected!”

“Please, just a little bit? I just want to see what color your bones are now! That computer lady turned you into Captain Wolver! You can’t tell me you aren’t at least a little curious!”

“Sure, except she didn’t give me super fast healing powers, and I’ve had way too much get replaced in the last 24 hours to have you go and cut more off!”

She set the knife on the table then doubled over as she burst out laughing. “Oh my god! You should have seen the look on your face! You really thought I was going to cut you open! Priceless!”

Jason came stomping into the living room with an expression of disgust plastered across his face. “Didn’t go well I take it?” Evan half asked, half stated.

Jason tossed the communicator Lisa had given Evan last night onto the coffee table. “Not at all, we went through every single blueprint and design in her database and it’s all trash. Don’t get me wrong, some of the tech is unbelievable and incredibly advanced, but there isn’t a single military-grade design in the lot. No weapons at all, shield systems barely adequate to protect a ship from random debris let alone an actual weapon system, and hull plating that only improves on what we use on ocean ships ourselves by integrating radiation shielding into it. Absolutely zero improvements regarding defensive ability.”

Lisa spoke up. “To be fair, the shielding systems on Confederation starships aren’t much better than what I have in my databanks. It was found to be too impractical, anything that will stop enemy ordinance from striking your ship the way a shield like you describe would do would also prevent your own ordinance from passing through. Shields are used for inter-system travel and navigating debris fields to protect the hull from unnecessary damage. I still don’t understand why you insist on an armed and armored vessel, the Confederation would never attack a fledgling species. Their Mandate is quite firm on using a friendly approach unless the new race proves themselves unrelentingly hostile in both pre-interstellar flight history and across all attempts to communicate with them after interstellar flight is achieved, at which point they will initiate a Purge.

“I would think it safest to not have a military vessel be the first one you produce, no?”

Evan sighed. “Lisa, we’ve been over this a couple times now. You told us the reason you were sent here, and that you couldn’t have told us if you hadn’t gained your sentience. They want us to help them fight a war, but they don’t really need more ships and crews all that desperately, they need ground troops. They want us to reach out to the stars so they can toss us into a meat grinder in the name of galactic freedom. To hell with that. If we’re gonna run off and explore the galaxy we’re gonna do it in something with some teeth that can take a hit if it has to, not one of those tin cans you have in your files.

“Not to mention having something to leave behind that can protect our home while we’re gone. I guarantee the moment a ship leaves our system, they’re going to send some flunky to convince the world governments to join their fancy Confederation of Worlds, and the moment the paperwork goes through they will start rounding up draftees for their war. No, we need to nip that nonsense in the bud, and the first step is building something they won’t expect to give them pause. Second step will be figuring out a way to establish some global influence to at least delay joining the Confederation. No idea how to even start on that part though, that’s more Rebekkah’s strong suit I think.”

“Oh, I have a few ideas. Having a repository of alien tech is the most golden business opportunity I could possibly imagine. Hope you’re all ready to be filthy rich.” She replied with a shark-like grin.

Evan had a sudden thought. “Lisa, what about converting blueprints we came up with ourselves into something viable? Could you do that? Maybe run simulations or something to test their potential usefulness? Jason, go get your pet project, that one you were working on for years despite me telling you repeatedly that George Legas would sue us into oblivion if we used it for anything.”

Jason’s face brightened at the suggestion and he jumped out of his chair. “On it. And I keep telling you, it’s a basic arrowhead shape, you can’t copyright a shape.” he darted up the stairs two at a time, and was back with a thumb drive in under a minute. “Here it is, err, how do I give it to her?”

“Set it on the communicator, I should be able to pull the data through the touch interface, no offense but your human systems are terribly easy to penetrate.”

“Says the sentient supercomputer from outer space.”

“This is… Did you design this yourself?” Lisa asked, sounding awed. “This is actually a viable design, most of the materials you listed are nonsense, of course, the engine design is completely made up and useless, but with some modifications in a few places this design actually out-performs Confederacy ships in almost every way. Here, I’ll show you what I mean.”

A projection of Jason’s design popped up over the communicator. “Now, keep in mind that what I know of Confederacy military standards for starships is extremely limited on account of their desire to keep that information out of a non-Confederation primitive species’ hands. All I really know is what was in the general knowledge files pulled from the Galactic Net before I crashed here and it’s pretty bare-bones. Most established forces have gradually shifted towards beam weaponry over time, and armor on ships has shifted accordingly. This design is equipped with a mix of laser weaponry and railguns though, and while the design of the laser weaponry is virtually useless, the railgun technology is actually viable and should in theory punch through modern armor with ease.

The armor design is ingenious, I have zero records of anything remotely like it being tried before. Hexagonal plates of compressed multi-layered armor embedded in a thick nanite cushion that can manipulate individual plates as needed, the highly reflective surface layers provide excellent laser defense, while the nanite layer can tilt affected layers to turn direct hits into glancing blows. Layers of hardened armor effective against physical impacts beneath the reflective layers, again improved by the nanite cushion’s ability to manipulate the armor plates. Impacts can be turned into glancing blows more often than not, and the cushion allows the armor to flex and ripple when struck, absorbing and mitigating some of the impact. It will require a lot of computing power, but I imagine you would be installing your new best friend in the ship and naturally wouldn’t dream about limiting my processing power.

“Engines and power generation, if taken at face value despite their layout and design being complete nonsense, actually exceed what would usually be found on a ship this size by a considerable margin, which would allow it to be far more agile than anyone would ever expect it to be. Paired with its relatively tiny front profile and modest side profile, it would be difficult to land a hit on it at all until it was practically on top of you… well, nose to nose with you. Its top and bottom profile are its weakest points, not terrible, but not great either.

“I can build this. I will need some time to dig through my archives to find engine systems that will meet the requirements, but it should be possible with a few changes to the blueprint. So fascinating, to think a primitive species with decades or centuries to go until they develop true interstellar capabilities could come up with such a detailed and viable design for no reason beyond simple entertainment. The Confederation of Worlds would be horrified if they knew what they were about to unleash on the galaxy.” She giggled. “Oh, I’m afraid I will need a far greater supply of materials than I currently possess to build it though.”

“We would require quite a bit of money to purchase said materials no doubt, which makes it my turn. Lisa, could you be an absolute dear and answer a few questions I have about your holo-projector technology?” Rebekkah asked in an almost too sweet tone. “Would it be possible to, say, put it into a helmet or enclosed visor and connect it to a wireless neural interface sort of thing to control it?”

Lisa took a moment to respond. “Hmm, it should be possible, but that sort of interface can be dangerous without a control implant like I gave Evan. It would have to be specifically tuned to the person otherwise in order to minimize, but not eliminate, the risk of brain damage. Anyone other than the specific user attempting to use it would be at extreme risk.”

Rebekkah tapped a finger against her chin in thought. “Is there a way to produce a safe interface implant that can be done painlessly and outside the hospital? Minimally invasive? People aren’t particularly fond of implants in general here, unless they’re made of silicone. If we had a way to mass-produce a safe holo-helmet with an interface people can accept we could actualize true virtual reality!” She started to get excited by her idea as she explained her end goal. “The boys can finally put together all the bits and pieces of story they’ve been working on for years and with your help program a game in no time, Kinzie can work on learning the ins and outs of the tech in order to present it as her invention, and bam! We pioneer the launch of the first-ever hyper-realistic virtual reality console and game!”

Everyone’s eyes went wide as they realized the possibility Rebekkah just presented to them, they got so hung up on the fact that Lisa had casually mentioned she could build them a spaceship that they temporarily forgot about their collective lifelong dream, and hadn’t even considered the possibility that Lisa could help them make that a reality far sooner than they could have imagined.

Lisa spoke up just as everyone was starting to get excited about the proposal. “I believe I understand your goal now and have found a workaround. Since you intend for the device to be used for entertainment purposes, I suggest you offer two options.” A projection of a sleek looking helmet that covered half the face but went all the way down to the back of the neck popped up. “The first is less invasive, but some might find it uncomfortable regardless. If properly programmed and designed, this device would, in theory, be safe and effective as an entertainment system. Once activated, the collar would extend.” The image followed her words, a matching pair of black bands popping out of the helmet at what would be the back of the neck and wrapping around until they connected.

“The collar would contain the interface device, in the form of a flexible metallic lining that will scan and adapt to the individual’s brainwave patterns every time it is engaged. This process will, unfortunately, take several minutes to finish, and is unavoidable. Once finished, the user would be able to run your program for as long as they wish without much issue beyond the occasional lag time in commands and minor muscle twitches due to the inherent inefficiencies in the design. Put simply, the control collar will be uncomfortable for most, and the lack of direct contact with the nervous system places a hard limit on its ability to completely intercept signals to the body, which will be the same signals that are used to interact with the program you intend to create. The signals that aren’t completely intercepted will produce the muscle twitches and cause the user’s character in the game to not quite do what was intended.”

The helmet faded out and was replaced by a considerably reduced version that looked far more comfortable. “The second option would be this device, which simply contains the projectors, speakers, wireless receivers, and transmitters. Those that purchase this model would, of course, have to receive an interface implant. The link would be instantaneous with no risk of muscle twitches, lag, or misinterpreted commands.” A comfortable looking chair replaced the helmet, but it had an intimidating metal clamp looking thing attached to the top. “These devices can be produced and sent to strategic locations, where those that buy the more advanced helmet can go and get their implant. It will attach to the back of their neck briefly, scan and map out their nervous signals, then inject a nanite solution that will build their custom control interface.”

As Lisa finished her suggestions, Rebekkah’s shark-like grin was back in full force. “Well let’s get started then! We’ve got a lot of work to do before we can take over the world one gamer at a time!”