《Congratulations, You're Dead!》# 61
Advertisement
"Hey Mittens." I scoop up the kitten and steal the chair he was sitting in before placing him in my lap. "I need some pet therapy little guy, and you're it." He starts purring as I scratch behind his ears.
"Everything okay?" Apricot stops playing, and comes to join me on the small couch. "Did Vivian upset you, or something? Want me to go rough her up?" She draws a smile from me.
"No, she's probably feeling pretty rough as it is right now." I explain about the imposter and the Queen's little speech. "I am so glad I'm not royalty, being Marquis of an empty grasslands is bad enough." I say with a sigh.
"I'm surprised she didn't ask you to help interrogate the woman, especially after what you did to that kidnapper."
"I think she was about to, but then changed her mind." I shake my head. "Glad she did too, I'm still a bit sick about what I did in the heat of the moment to that kidnapper. To do it again premeditatively, I just don't think I could. Or, if I did, that it would break something in me."
"You are such a softie." My pixie pecks me on the cheek. "So, what else needs to be done for the party?"
"Not much; the entertainment is pretty much covered, though I still need to make some duplicates and spread them throughout the house. Kyle is handling the extra servants, and I'll do the cooking tomorrow while they're getting acquainted with the place. Today, I've really only got to make the party favors, and add some more ambiance to the garden. I'd hoped to take these three days to build golems, but I can just use Light spells."
"Well, at least you got some more Rune games done on the trip, and it's not like it was without rewards." She flexes her bicep to show off her new-found strength.
"Mhm. Just hope it didn't mess up Amelia's little project." I fish for clues.
"No, she's... Hey, don't think you can get it out of me that easily." She almost fell for it.
"Eh, worth a shot." I try to mess up her hair, but it's always springs back into a big round mop, so my efforts go for naught. "What about you? You can't just want to stay at home playing games all the time."
"Yes, I can." She chuckles, and ruffles my hair, but it's too short to do much to. "Seriously, I'm happy to just laze around and let you keep me entertained. Just keep up the tasty food, movies, music, games, and toys." She winks. "And, I'm good."
"Are all pixies hedonists, or is it just you?" I chuckle.
"No, it's pretty much all of us." She laughs with me. "We only need magic to survive, so our days are spent just having fun. You lunkers take everything too seriously."
"Trust me I want for nothing but a life filled with silliness and fluff." I floof up the kitty.
"Be nice to the poor little thing." She smoothes his fur back down. "Well, no matter how serious life gets, you've got Amelia and me here to help you handle it."
"Thank you." I kiss her on the forehead. "If it wasn't for finding her and you I'd probably be wandering around the woods, wiping out the local wolf population. Now, I've got a life and a family, even if things get a bit too serious sometimes."
Advertisement
"Yeah, how are your nightmares doing? Did they start including any giant worms?" She snickers at the look that crosses my face.
"Gee thanks. I'm sure that isn't going to put the thought in my head." I didn't have any problem with bad dreams until we reached the city, and I finally felt I could relax and deal with what I went through. "None this morning, but I think I was too tired to dream. And, they've been getting better lately anyways. Thanks to you two."
"We'll be there tonight if this imposter business brings up anything." She puts her arm around my shoulder. "But for now, you've got hundreds of runes to create, and I've got a high score to raise even higher. These new stats are awesome."
"You are such a goof." I pat her on the butt and start playing Pinball Wizard as she heads back to the machine. It's always fun to watch her bob along to the music while playing.
I'm still a bit peckish, so I make a bag of popcorn and share it with Apricot by floating kernels past her mouth as she plays. She takes control of the music player after The Who finish playing, and puts on one of her upbeat dance song playlists.
While she's dancing in place, I retrieve some silica from my inventory and fashion several hundred glass cubes. The camera bodies I fashion out of wood, even though each one only takes me seconds to enchant, there's still hundreds of them. So, it takes me a good half hour before they're all done.
Not wanting to go outside, I just sit there and send my mind to explore the garden. I start by adding light everywhere, each plant made to look like it's glowing while shimmering dandelion seeds made from pure magic waft about illuminating the various pathways
I start on the wildlife next, I add fish, snails, and frogs to the pond. Then to feed them, some water striders, mayflies, and water boatmen. I also make a pair of damselflies, one blue and one orange to go along with the dragonfly golem.
Moving on, I begin to fill out the rest of the garden with the bugs and small animals from the merry-go-round. My favorite being ruby ladybugs munching on glowing yellow-green aphids.
Then, in a nod to Norse mythology I turn the waterfalls rainbow colored, and place a serpent at the base of the tree, a squirrel in its branches, and an eagle on its crown. These and all the other creatures have been given a simple routine to follow, and enough magic to last for days.
"That garden looks amazing babe." Amelia says sitting down next to me. I barely even noticed her return, I was so caught up with decorating. "It's already dark, why don't you take a break and we can get dinner ready."
"Sounds good." I smile. "I'm still hungry, got too caught up yesterday, and even the extra snacks before and after lunch didn't help much. Let's make something hearty, I'm feeling pasta." I pull her up and drag her and Apricot into the kitchen. "Maybe noodles and meatballs with cheesy garlic knots? Need veggies too; a Cucumber salad, and do you want stuffed eggplant, or roasted artichokes."
"Artichokes." Apricot speaks up and snags some of the cheese I'm using to make the garlic knots.
"That's fine by me, but what's for dessert?" Amelia shrugs.
"Oh, it's gotta be *tiramisu*. The name literally means 'pick me up'." I explain and smile at the fact that I've pixie-safed coffee. "It's a bit like a trifle, but has coffee in it, so I haven't made it before now. Oh, your parents are home, and they brought Charlie with them. May take them a while to get inside though, they're staring at the garden."
Advertisement
"It is very stare worthy." She laughs.
"Oh, just wait until I add the fireflies." I snap my fingers and the kitchen fills with them. "I'm going to have them all over the garden."
"Aww, pretty. I love glowbugs." Apricot shrinks down and starts chasing them.
We have a little dog-fight in the middle of the kitchen. Wings of lightning bugs working together to try and attack her, all while dodging and using the floating food as cover. She starts capturing troops by taking control of the spell, and we're in the middle of one truly epic mid-air battle when Kaitlyn, Turner, and Charlie enter the room.
Amelia's parents take it in stride, but Charlie just stands there dumbfounded. Apricot and I look at each other for a second, before grinning like mad men. The fighters sweep past each other and start making a beeline for the merchant.
"Aahhh!" He screams as they impact and bounce off of him only to fly back and start clinging to his body. We all start giggling as he tries to brush them away only to have them explode into glowing glitter.
"Hey, Charlie. How you been?" I say between giggles.
He finally understands what going on, and frowns for a moment before breaking into a wide grin. "Alright, you got me." He shakes his head with a laugh. "I've been good, but is it always like this here?" He directs to Turner.
"Mhm, you tend to get used to it." Amelia's dad snatches a garlic knot from the air. "Ooh, these are good."
"Wait until he sets the table, dear." His wife scolds him, but grabs one for herself.
"Come. Sit, sit. Everything's ready now, and there's a new dessert for afterwards." I pull a couple bottles of a near-merlot from the pantry while the table sets itself. "This fruity red should go well with the tomato sauce." The corks fly out and the wine spirals through the air to fill six glasses.
"You get used to this?" Charlie says with a laugh.
"When he does the same thing every time he cooks, yes." Kaitlyn answers. "Amelia's even started to copy him when she's in the kitchen."
"It's good magic practice." She defends herself while loading up her plate.
We make small talk over the meal, but it's not until the tiramisu comes out that Charlie explains the reason for his visit.
"Mmm, is that coffee?" He moans after taking a bite of the chilled dessert. "And, is this stuff on top chocolate?"
"Cocoa powder, yes." I reply after savoring my own bit.
"Ah, that's actually why I came over today." He says between forkfuls. "I know you plan to sell it through Turner, but he's agreed to let me handle the shipping. I need to know how well it travels though."
"Oh, quite well." I nod excitedly. "If kept cool and dry, it can maintain its quality for months, or even years. Too much humidity or too high temperatures will cause sugar and fat blooms respectively. These are marked by a whitish discoloration of the chocolate. The chocolate is still safe to eat at this point, but the flavor and mouth feel will be slightly off. But, you can just melt it down, and re-temper it, if you really need to."
"That is excellent news." His head bobs just like mine did. "Are there any other issues to worry about?"
"It picks up odors easily, so it should be packed tightly and not stored next to any pungent foods." I shrug unable to think of anything else. "Cocoa powder doesn't have all the fats and sugars that chocolate does, so it will last even longer. Provided it's sealed tightly."
"Ah, but you're the only one who knows how to cook with it."
"So, sell a cookbook. Or, just market each jar of powder with a different recipe." I take a few seconds to transcribe a few dozen chocolate recipes onto paper. "You're the merchants, I'm sure you'll figure it out. Just tell me how many tonnes of the stuff you want."
"Tonnes?" His eyes go wide. "Oh, I'm going to need extra security. I wonder if John and his team are still around."
"Uncle Charlie." Amelia smiles at the man. "Haha. Haven't you figured out by now that Sorrel doesn't do things by halves?" She gestures out the window to the glowing garden.
"I can provide you with some defensive runes too." I offer. "I'm not sure what prices you all are working out, but it's probably safe to say the stuff is nearly worth its weight in gold."
"You're not far off." Turner has a shit eating grin on his face. "Your man Kyle told me that every single person you invited asked if there would be chocolate at the party. And, several of them wanted to work out some deals."
"Oh? I'll be sure to send anyone who bugs me about it at the party over to you." I chuckle at the look of greed that fills his face. "The price is bound to come down eventually, but we might as well rake it in while we can." Amelia seems happy to hear me say that, which is exactly why I did so.
We retired to the game room after dinner to chat and get Charlie's perspective on the games. He and Turner got into a pretty heated air-hockey match, only to have Kaitlyn come along and whip both of them at it.
***
I woke with the sun, eager to get the last minute preparations for the party done. Leaving the girls to sleep in a bit more, I sneak downstairs and meet Charlie in the kitchen as he's looking for an early snack.
"Morning." I greet the balding merchant as he's rummaging around in the cupboards. "I was just about to fix a quick meal. You want anything in particular?"
"No, thank you. I was just going to have some bread and jam, but you've got a dozen different types here." He lets out a quiet laugh. "Not even sure what some of these are. Never heard of boysenberry, for example."
"Oh, that's one of my favorites, it's a cross between blackberries, raspberries, and dewberries." I pull a jar of it from the cupboard and toast some thick bread slices.
"Mind toasting a couple slices for me too? Even after all these years I still burn it whenever I try to make toast." He laughs at himself.
"Sure, and thanks for the idea." I make him some toast and start building a toaster. "I've already got a rune based oven, but it heats everything evenly." I explain after noticing the quizzical look on his face. "You don't want bread toasted on the inside, just the outside. So, I'm making a toaster."
The finished product is modeled after one of those clear glass toasters. I drop a slice in and turn the dial to medium before pressing the start button. A few seconds later a perfectly toasted slice of bread is ready. Pushing down the lever on one side drops the toast into my hand.
"Oh, that'll be useful." Kaitlyn says while walking to the kitchen island. "Could you get me a couple slices too?" I make another slice and float it, and the one I just made onto a plate for her. A jar of grape jam and a small pot of butter join it on the counter in front of her.
"Want anything else? I was just going to have toast, but it's no trouble."
"Thank you dear, but this is fine." She starts buttering the toast.
"If you're offering, I wouldn't mind some sausage and eggs." Turner enters the room carrying Mittens. "Think this little guy is hungry too." A "mrow" confirms his suspicions. "Man, he doesn't look it, but he's kinda hefty for a kitten."
"Really?" I walk over and pick him up. "Hey bud, is all this Mana turning you into a super kitty?" I sat after running a quick scan of his body. "He's healthy, but you're right his muscles and bones are a bit more dense than before."
"Hah, even your pets are magical." Charlie guffaws.
"A lot of the wildlife are actually adapting the higher level of ambient magic in similar ways." I explain. "I almost crashed the Rocket the other day because a vole was making it's burrow in the stone underneath a bridge, causing it to collapse."
"That's a little disturbing." His guffaw turns into a nervous laugh.
"Yeah, but the dungeon would have brought this change eventually. The Mana Well is just speeding up the process." I set Mittens down and produce a bowl of meat for him. "Do you want some minced mousie? Huh, you silly little kitty you." He purrs and starts chowing down.
"You do know that he's supposed to hunt down the mice for you, not the other way around, right?" Turner laughs as his breakfast finishes cooking and plates itself in front of him.
"The mouse is more likely to eat him." I counter. "This little trouble magnet has zero survival skills." I return to my breakfast. "So, are you staying for the party today Charlie?"
"I have some things to do today, but I'll be back for it later." He replies after drinking a gulp of water. "Speaking of." He turns to Turner. "Are you going in to work today? Mind if I catch a ride?"
"Yeah, we're just going to check in at the warehouse before doing some shopping though. We can leave after breakfast."
"When are you two going to let me make you a car?" I project an image of Turner behind the wheel with his arm around Kaitlyn, the wind blowing her hair back as they race around the counter tops.
"Hahah. Thanks for the offer, but I'm more used guiding a horse around than trying to control that beastie." I have mini-turner spin the wheel too hard, making the car go out of control and over the edge where it explodes into sparkles upon hitting the ground. "Yeah, hahahah. That didn't help. Hahaaah." He sighs out a laugh while shaking his head.
"Oh, looks like Kyle is almost here." I picked him up on my Sorrel-senses when he turned onto the block. "I should go greet him, and see if any last-minute issues have cropped up before I get to work expanding the parking area."
"Could you get the horse hitched for us? Since you're going that way." Turner says around a mouth full of food.
"No problem." I wave and walk out of the kitchen.
***
Advertisement
- In Serial86 Chapters
Hero Delivery
Is your world about to die?The all-consuming chaos coming to destroy your world?Demon King winning?Why not summon a Hero?Heroes come from another world and are ready to solve your world's problems. Each one comes with their own powers that, as long as they are nurtured, can be used to save your world (or at the very least, improve life!).Choose from one of our own popular delivery services: isekai, transmigration, reincarnation, or custom summon them. Hero Delivery is here for you. Warning: Treat your Heroes right. Join us and follow the story of the one responsible for delivering quality Heroes to worlds in peril. Journey with us to learn all there is to know about delivering Heroes to another world. [participant in the Royal Road Writathon challenge]
8 153 - In Serial42 Chapters
The Man who knew no Limits
The story follows the life of a man who gets teleported to another world with a strange power. And that is where the cliches end. Common morals do not apply to the man. He is crude. He will do what he wants: he will not shy from using cheap tricks if it leads to a situation favourable to him. He will not save a damsel in distress if he doesn't want to, even if it is as easy as lifting a finger. He may even cause the distress himself if he finds it amusing. He may reward those who please him, while trampling those who are annoying. But the man's life, by no means, will be easy. He shall be OP, but it will not be enough, for some things just cannot be controlled. Warning: Gore, profanity, explicit sexual content. =========================================== I have taken the image from some article. If the owner would like me to take it down, can please let me know.
8 228 - In Serial35 Chapters
Yibo's Baby{Completed}
ရိေပၚ ဆီမွာ ေမ်ာက္စိတ္နဲ႔ယုန္ေလးတစ္ေကာင္ရိွတယ္ရိပေါ် ဆီမှာ မျောက်စိတ်နဲ့ယုန်လေးတစ်ကောင်ရှိတယ်
8 198 - In Serial20 Chapters
The Fat Prince Volume 2: A Hero Among Thieves
Prince Cyrus Coates was once living in the lap of luxury, casting pixie dust to bring him food and write letters to his beloved Princess Trinity; but now he's out on the road trying to save his true love from a mishap he made. Joined by his magician-jester companion, Archibald and Princess Trinity's diguised femaled knight, Vanessa Montero, he vanquished the wicked Everblood singer Rosemary, but new troubles have arisen in her place. Cyrus has arrived in Thieves' Town, a district in Scum County where his royal parents have used their power to make the residents toil in mines for the prince's precious pixie dust. Unbeknowest to Cyrus, while he lounged at home, carelessly casting pixie dust for all his needs, common folk worked from dawn until dusk providing him with his luxury. Cyrus is forced to not only discover the truth about his decadent life style, but save the town of rogues from the forces of darkness that threaten to overtake the whole kingdom! Can Cyrus right his parents' grave moral wrongs against Thieves' Town and become a hero among thieves? Or will the Everblood menace triumph? Find out in this thrilling second volume!
8 176 - In Serial12 Chapters
The Point Legacy
PLANET EARTH in the year 2020,The ground shakes with a heaven sundering roar, a massive figure is seen in the vast skies above, the figure both stationary but omnipresent. A voice thunders, like the massive roar of the inimitable tide, "You have been selected to represent me in 'The Games'." It sounds almost displeased when it utters the word "selected". "Brace yourself and say goodbye to the little attachment you have to your planet, for never will you see it again, unless...." Then the lights went out on a planetary scale.--------------------------------------------------Each human of every race awakens a new form of levelling, a Point Cloud (search online for the same for a visual impact), each dot in a Point Cloud, known as a Bio Point, can be 'opened' with energy and in doing so will help the person gain more strength. Hope y'all like it.
8 85 - In Serial26 Chapters
The antique shop of the devil
Victor Wartell transmigrates from the Earth into a similar world as his previous one. Setting up an antique store, he goes on to live a normal peaceful life. Or so he thought: Strange people, cosplayers, historical fanatics and nutjobs kept showing up. They all wanted to buy his products and he does not know why antiques go so well in this new world.Either way, he is content with his situation. Learning and adapting to the new environment, Victor will have to experience ups and downs of the new society. Making enough profit to maintain a carefree lifestyle and getting used to his chance of a new, exciting life seems like a good deal for him.Only thing he would say to the nutjobs: Stop with all the wild speculations, I am not what you think I am. Current schedule :Every saturday and extra chapter sometimes in Monday as per poll result :) Special thanks once again to Asviloka for the amazing cover!
8 149

