《Congratulations, You're Dead!》# 64
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"Sorrel!" Apricot comes flying over, with Amelia running after her. "What happened? What the hells was that?"
"Realm? It's an upgrade to Domain that I've been toying with since I unlocked Mana Mastery. First time I've ever actually cast it."
"Why..." Amelia starts to ask before she finally notices the piles of junk. "What the fuck! Is that whole thing full of gold?"
"Yup." I sit up and pull them both into a hug. "And, we have Lan to thank for all this."
"S-Sorrel?" Lan comes walking up at that point. The look on his face just sets me to laughing again. "How?"
"With style and finesse." I grin and show the hidden siege weapons again. "And, hundreds and hundreds of ballistae to back me up."
"How long have those been there?" Amelia asks while Apricot just pouts and says. "Why didn't you let me fire any of them?"
"I told you I took precautions to protect our home." I kiss each of them on the forehead before lifting us to our feet with Magic. "And, I think a certain prince is rather lucky that I did. They now think you're dead, by the way." I playback the scene for everyone, starting from when the intruders first entered the garden and ending with them running off.
"Wind and Water, Sorrel. You're fucking nuts." Apricot clings to my arm as the playback stops.
"I'm with the pixie." Amelia stares at me. "What were you thinking?"
"What? They pissed me off." I huff. "I was going to play nice, but that loud mouth just had to try and order me around."
"Are they really gone?" Lan asks while staring at me in mixture of fear and awe.
"Two kilometers outside the gate and still running." I've been tracking them visually since they left my magical range.
"Really?" Lan asks, so I just show him and the girls the image I'm seeing with a mix of Magnify and a conjured mirror in the sky.
"Yes, really. I just need to know if you think they'll be stupid enough to try and come back."
"No!" He says emphatically. "They think I'm dead, and you took the blood tracker. All this is just stuff; my brother will be more than happy to replace it for them." His face shows a complicated mixture of emotions when he talks about his brother.
"Yeah, I think it's about time you tell us that story." Amelia glares at him.
"Not much to it." Lan sighs. "I was the Crown Prince of Freraskir, my father was a powerful Awakened and should have lived for centuries more. But..." He pauses to take a steadying breath. "He was assassinated by my brother, who then framed me for it."
"My condolences." I walk over and put a hand on his shoulder.
"One can't change the past, no matter how much magic they have." He looks at me, his eyes shining with gratitude. "But, you've given me my future back. Thank you." He backs up and bows to me, his waist bending a full ninety degrees.
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"What do you plan to do now?"
"I'll need to head back... one day. But, for now? I think I'd just like to stop running for a little while."
"Well, then let me be the first to welcome you to Larendath." I give him a slap on the back. "Now come on, you can help us sort through all this junk so I can fix up my garden. but, first. Cleanse! Not a damned one of them has done their laundry for months. Don't want to ask your leader to do it? Then at least buy the damned cantrip from Temmie you slobs." I grouse at the long gone mages.
***
"So..." I draw out the word. "They were an interesting mix for a team. Good composition of Magics but, if their inventories say anything about their personalities, then I'm surprised they were able to work together."
"I'm still surprised you were able to beat them." Lan says while looking over four piles of loot.
"I cheated." I smile and use the same line from before. "Realm neutralized their defenses, and blunted their attacks, while preventing them from drawing on the Well. All I had to do after that was move around a few plants, which is what I'm best at."
"And if your new and untried spell had failed?" Amelia says with more than a bit of heat in her voice.
"Then I would have killed them." I answer in a monotone. "Even if most of the ballistae are just the basic models, but I do have a few Wormslayers mixed in too. They would have cut right through whatever defenses those three could have conjured."
"Oh, Sorrel." She and Apricot pull me into a hug at that.
"Uh, Wormslayer?" Lan says after a polite cough. "Is that a mistranslation?"
"No." Apricot answers in a cheery voice. "We ran into a kilometer long earthworm a few days ago."
"A what? Are you sure your spell is working?" He looks at me confused.
"You heard the pixie." I chuckle. "We didn't believe it at first either. I made some weapons that could cut through meters of hardened stone, but the stupid thing was only as tough as a regular worm. We all may have gone a bit overboard, but have you ever heard of anything, let alone a worm that big?"
"..." He just shakes his head.
"Got some good rewards from it, though. And, speaking of which." I turn to the largest pile. "These guys sure liked to drink, maybe that's what kept them together as a team. Oh well, it's mine now."
I separate the alcohol from the large central pile that contained items they all had in common, like furniture, bedding, food, etcetera.
"You might as well take the food, Lan since it's from your homeland. And, if you want any of the clothes, I can resize them to fit."
"No, thank you." He takes the food, but shakes his head at the offered clothing.
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"Don't blame you." I say before walking over to the pile belonging to their weakest member, an Air and Light Mage, likely their scout. But, we've just dubbed him 'the pervert'.
His wardrobe was filled with outer garments similar to the others, but all his under things were lacy undergarments clearly designed for a woman, but all built to his size. I'm not normally one to kink-shame, but that was the least of his perversions.
The dude had so much porn that it's not even funny. Everything from crude sketches to fanciful paintings, sculptures, carvings, and everything in-between; seems that if it had naked people in it, he begged borrowed, or stole it.
Most likely stole, if the enchanted cloak of shadows, thieves’ kit, disguise Rune, and impossibly tangled length of rope, say anything about it. And then, there were the truly interesting enchanted items.
Like the large ring enchanted to increase blood pressure and decrease skin sensitivity, it doesn't take a genius to figure out what that one was for. And, an immovable rod, which you'd think was part of his burglars gear, until you saw that it was rounded over on the ends, and stored with a bottle of oil. I may have cast Cleanse a couple more times after finding those.
"I think I'm just going to copy the enchantments and destroy everything else. Unless any of you want some of the 'art'? I'm looking at you Apricot, I saw you eyeing those statuettes."
"Heheheh." She giggles. "I don't want anything he touched, no matter how many times you clean it, but maybe you could re-create some stuff later." She says shamelessly.
I move over to the pile belonging to their Earth mage, who I've started calling 'the artist'. The first thing that drew mine and Amelia's eyes was a small library. "You want copies of any of these Lan? I'll have to translate them all for Amelia later, but it's no problem making some duplicates now."
"Oh, if it's no trouble." He says and quickly picks out a few dozen tomes.
I copy those for him and move all the originals over by the booze before continuing with the pile. There's a sketchpad and drawing pencils, his works are detailed, but a bit bland. He also had a set of stone carvings that, judging by the trace magic in them, he made himself.
There were a couple fine instruments, and a few dozen puzzle boxes too. But, I got the feeling that these were more time wasters for him than anything else, judging from how they were all stored haphazardly in the same box.
The real prize from him was his extensive rock collection, including an impressive array of gemstones, and several large chunks of jade in all its natural colors. And, last but not least, a good five kilograms of essential iron.
"Think I'm going to keep all his stuff, especially this." I crow while hefting it in my hand. "Hey Lan, don't suppose you know what the better alloys are? Since, that seems to be the iron essence's thing."
"I do, actually." He takes out a slim volume entitled 'Metallic Essences' from his inventory. "This has a large section on the various steels, and elemental alloys that can be made with it. I don't suppose you'd be willing to sell some of that?" He asks hopefully.
"Well, we're set for coin right now." I look over to Amelia who hasn't strayed far from the treasure chest. "But, if you've got more books like that, or anything on magic really then it's yours. The Guild's library is somewhat lacking when it comes to anything beyond the basics. And, I need knowledge more than anything else right now."
"Unfortunately I had to leave my library behind, but if you give me paper, I can copy down everything I've read for you. Though, it might take me a bit longer than it would you." He smiles while looking at the metallic essence in my hand.
"Deal!" I copy his book, and toss the essence over without a second’s thought, my share from the worm far outweighs this tiny chunk, anyways. "But, let's deal with this last pile first." My lip curls up in disgust at the pile that belonged to their leader, a Fire and Water Mage.
It's mostly trophies; ears, claws, and fangs from beasts are the least distasteful, and make me wish I had never kept those fangs from that one wolf VeeGee dropped me next to. Of the other trophies, a petrified human hand with six fingers on it, and a wand crafted from an elf's thighbone are probably the least offensive.
There's a small dungeon's worth of torture equipment that I would have disintegrated on the spot if most of it weren't enchanted in one way or another. And, if that all weren't bad enough; there's one item that makes me wish I had killed the bastard.
It's a tortured sentient soul that has been forged into a dagger. "Shit like this is why I'm taking the hard route for Golemancy. Disintegrate!" It puts up a fight at first by trying to cut through the magic, but I pour on everything that I and the tree have to offer, and wipe it from existence. "May the gods grant you some peace in the next life."
"Hey, it's not all bad." Apricot says to lessen the tension. "He also had this." She toes a nightcap that's been enchanted to help grow hair.
"And they all had those self-erecting tents." Amelia adds. "And, I know you can't wait to check out these potions and spell scrolls."
"And, I hate to interrupt your brooding." Lan says with a laugh. "But, what is the hard route for Golemancy?"
"Alright, alright." I raise my hands in surrender. "I'll lighten up. And, that is just me making golems through enchanting instead of mucking about with souls." I call the dragon fly over from the pond.
***
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