Unique Skill [Loot Crate Maniac] level 3 unlocked.

There is a situation right now. And the weird level has broken the roof, escaped the gravity well, and skyrocketed into the cosmos. To sum up:

Shraaizar has eaten Old Geezer whole, has a huge bulge down her mid-section, and is almost falling asleep.

There are around 50 monkeys around us, looking in awe. They track my every movement. It is creepy.

I ‘unlocked’ a unique skill. Hooray! One more cheat. Except I don’t know what to do. If I stop to check it, the monkeys might attack. I’ll have to carry a sleeping overeating naga, and either do a defensive battle or run away. All my stuff is lost.

I tap the Naga: “Shraaizar, you can’t sleep now. The monkeys there, they are creepy.”

“What are you talking about, everything is fine.” – She retorts, too drowsy to understand what I am saying.

“How it is fine? The monkeys are waiting for an opening to attack en masse, you are out of combat, and I unlocked an Unique Skill right now.”

“But the monkeys won’t attack.” - she says as if it was the most natural thing.

“How so?” - How can she be so certain?

“Why would they attack their chieftain?”

“You mean the Old Geezer in your belly?” - I point at the bulge.

“He is dead. He is no longer the chieftain. (yawn) You killed him. You are the chieftain.”

I killed the monkey boss, so I am stronger than the monkey boss. Now the monkeys obey me. Minions GET? Lets try it out.

“Hey you filthy monkeys, everyone get down from the trees!” - On the double soldier!

The monkeys rush down. I command again: “Line up in front of me. All of you. I want to say something.”

Again, they bunch up in front of me. Hey, I said line up.

“My bag.” I let my anger out. The monkeys tremble. “My stuff. My clothes, my mementos. The fool monkeys that attempted to steal those, died. Now do you also want to die?”

I’m a villain. The monkeys cower. I point to where my bag was.

Angry troll yells: “Now, all the things you monkeys took from me, all the things that belong to me that are scattered in this forest because of you… Go! Fetch them! Bring my things to me!”

Don’t ask me how did they understand me, they just did. This is not human speech (and mine is terrible yet). I’m grunting, roaring and yet my monster-talk gets out just fine. It didn’t work with wolves, and I had not a chance to talk peacefully with goblins or orcs yet.

While the monkeys run all around the forest, I sit down and check the data for this new skill:

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[Loot Crate Maniac] level 3 [318 / 10000]

- Available pemadra points: 318

Allows the use of “pemadra” points to purchase loot crates from the “elsewhere”. There are several categories and types of loot crates. Impossible to raise using skill points.

Each type has ranks with increasing costs. Select a grade:

Crate Rank Point Cost Crate Rank Point Cost Peasant Crate (Rank: J) 2 Duke Crate (Rank: C) 1,500 Merchant Crate (Rank: I) 8 Lord Crate (Rank: A) 15,000 Knight Crate (Rank: H) 15 King Crate (Rank: S) 150,000 Count Crate (Rank: E) 150 Emperor Crate (Rank: SS) 1,500,000

Each crate contains from 3 to 4 skills. Each odd level increases the upper limit by 1. Lower limit is increased by 1 at level 10.

Crates will disappear after all items are picked up. Unused items will vanish in one hour.

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I fiddle with the settings a little. Five seems fine, lets do an experiment. I sit next to Shraaizar.

I summon a loot crate: “[Peasant Skill Crate]!” - A rag bag with some pastel colored dull crystals appeared. I feel elated. This thrill. The joy of discovering that you wasted your points...

- [Belching] (grade J) skill crystal obtained.

- [Farming] (grade D) skill crystal obtained.

- [Complaining] (grade I) skill crystal obtained.

- Limited Edition Complimentary First Crate Golden Ticket (grade S) obtained.

I look at the ticket, and get the feeling I can activate it. I’ll not do it now. I need a better grasp of the situation.

The big surprise to me is that [Complaining] is graded higher than belching. It alleviates mental stress by increasing the mental stress of everyone around you by the same amount. But something else that is good came.

[Farming]: Increases crop yield by x5% and area of farmland one can care for by xx10%.

This one is good enough. I activate the crystal.

- Skill [Farming] level 1 acquired.

The other two… I’m not sure. I’ll stash away those two crystals. Should I try a big one with the points I have now, or should I save for better ones? Or burn it all into crappy crates in hopes something really good comes out? I don’t know. I just know that deep inside me, an urge to keep buying loot crates is welling up. I’d like to ask someone, but...

Shraaizar is sound asleep with a happy face. Her spiny frills move slowly as she breathes. Monkey sounds echo in the forest. Some of them are fighting something.

The best crate I can get for 150 points is a [Count Skill Crate]. It is a grade E type of crate.

Some monkeys come near us, holding some items in their hands. Goblin toothpicks, some ruined clothes and wolf pelts. I look at them in my pensive mood. I’m more concerned about the potential of [Loot Crate Maniac] to screw me than the stuff the monkeys broke.

The monkeys leave the stuff in a pile, and run away. After a couple minutes another group comes from another direction, and drop even more stuff. Oh, the iron pot is back. Dented. More monkeys. The rucksack, ripped.

A group of badly wounded monkeys come, they aren’t carrying anything. And behind them, some burly monkeys with an angry demeanor. The wounded monkeys grovel, the others begin to grunt, squeak and growl. I don’t get what they are trying to convey. They notice my puzzled look, and make eating gestures while pointing at the groveling ones.

“Did these guys here eat my food?” - I ask

They nod.

The gacha will have to wait. I need to put some discipline into these monkeys first. I doubt there is something salvageable in my stuff.

I talk to the biggest monkey of the burly group: “Call every monkey back here. They should bring what they have already found, but no more searches.”

The burly group split and each monkey run in a direction. This sensation of bossing them around is good. I could get used to it really easy.

About half hour later, a lot of monkeys come. Some of them are carrying items, but most of them are carrying the monkeys we defeated, goblins and wolves.

“No. Don’t put corpses with the other items. Put the corpses in a pile over there.”

There are some twenty to thirty corpses. They are badly damaged.

I will make use of what is given to me. “Take the pemadra of those corpses and bring them to me.”

The monkeys look at the corpses, but don’t understand. I take one wolf pemadra from my bag.

“This is pemadra.” - I point at the pemadra, and show them to the monkeys. I turn around, so all the monkeys can see it. And I repeat several times.

“Pemadra.”

Then I point at the corpses: “Bring me the pemadra in those bodies.”

It was the worst idea of the day.

The monkeys don’t have claws like me, and they don’t have a human soul driving their monster body like me. So how will they get the pemadras out of the bodies? With their teeth.

And now I am witnessing a gore feast that would make a HG Lewis movie look like a Mouse’s Princess cartoon. The monkeys are cannibals. They ate large chunks of flesh out of their fallen brethren.

After twenty something pemadras are brought to me, I call the burly monkey squad.

“Divide the meat from those corpses between all monkeys. Including the wounded ones.”

I then address all the monkeys: “Nobody in this group can fight for food. Do not take the food of your comrade. If any of you fight for food, I will eat it.”

The monkeys tear remaining flesh, and all of them begin to eat in a frenzy. I’m forced to watch, because I need to intimidate them if any fight breaks out. Some monkeys are not getting any food. I intervene.

“Give some of the food to the ones around you. Share so everyone has something to eat. If there is any that got no food, I’ll eat the one that got the most food.”

Some greedy monkeys freeze on the spot. Oh, they are part of the burly squad. They look at me, then hand over food to the ones further away.

It takes an hour for the monkeys to finish eating. Meanwhile, I eat all my pemadra.

- [Pemadra points] acquired: 135.

Fifty points short of my goal of 500. Guess it can’t be helped. They were all low rank monsters. The one that gave the most points out of this batch was the orc’s.

I take some goblin toothpicks, and call the burly squad. “You, you and you. Guard the sleeping Naga with your lives. Use this to stab your enemies.” I show them some basic spear moves. “Here, take one of them each of you.”

Then I address the three that were hogging the food. “You guys, will come with me. I have a special mission for you. Take these spears.”

“You wounded guys there, take a rest.” then I call the rest. “And all of you, help guard the area.”

I depart to the slime area with the gluttonous burly monkeys. We enter the area, and a yellow slime comes. The GBM trio engages with their goblin toothpicks. I stand behind, and look for the core.

I brought them here to be my meat shield, and to punish them for eating too much. They are fighting using the goblin toothpicks, and they have zero skill with spears. They are taking more damage than they are dealing to the slime. A faint odor of lemon mixes with burnt monkey.

After a minute or so, I locate the core. The slime is reduced to half its original size. And the monkeys are half naked. The acid ate their hairs.

I take aim with a toothpick, and hit the core with a precise throw.

- Skill [Short spear] increased to 4.

- Active ability [Power Javelin (+20% acc, +50% dmg)] learned.

The monkeys are splashed with acid from the slime death burst. I walk in, take the pemadra, and eat it on the spot. Worth 47 points. Sour lemon. Actually, all the monkeys and the area around here smell of lemon.

We walk a bit more, and finally find my spear. It is right where I left it. I pick it up, something black rolls around. Another pemadra. From that black jumping slime? I also chug it down. It tastes awful. But it is worth 280 points. More than Red Streak!! I have now 777 pemadra points. Lolz.

We go back. While I walk, I examine my spear. Unscathed. The slimes didn’t even attempt to eat the horn. It is good to have my weapon back. We return, all the monkeys are there idling around, and Shraaizar is still sleeping. I hope she won’t hibernate. But it is still summer. Anacondas take several days to consume prey. I hope for the best.

The reason I didn’t spend my points yet is simple. When dealing with a new series of loot crates, you need to open several and tally the results, to get a glimpse of drop rates. I won’t expect the shitty admins (if there are any) of this world to disclose that kind of data with me. From how this world has been treating me, it hates me. But I’ll endure and laugh at them.

Skills. I need a rare skill. 587 points. I’ll buy Three [Count Skill Crate]. Tension. Small ornamented silver-laid chests appear.

Inside the chests, there are a total of 13 skills. (E) [penmanship], (D) [fencing style], (F) [Parrying Dagger], (F) [Punching], (E) [Weather Sense], (H) [Spitting], (E) [Short Blades], (F) [Parrying Dagger], (E) [Wood Working], (F) [Survival Shelters], (E) [Leadership], (E) [Tanning], (E) [Maces].

I need to check lower rank skill crates. I should 10 [Merchant Skill Crate] or 4 [Knight Skill Crate]. There will be some points left, but I shouldn't spend everything in one go. My hunch is that [Merchant …] will have greater chance of production and traveling related skills, and [Knight …] will be some basic combat skills and things related to warfare. But I need volume, and knight is out. 10 [Merchant Skill Crates]!!!!!!!!!

Lots of travel and production related skills, like [hiking], [mining], [prospecting], [blacksmith], [bartering], [negotiation], [basic math], [charioteer], [perception], [climate adaptation], and some duplicates.

There are some monkeys that are looking at me with eyes like they are teen girls watching a boy band live performance. I would be troubled if they begin to worship me. I don’t even want to be their boss.

I hold back in learning those skills. I don’t know the effect it will have on available Skill Points, and I don’t know if there is a limit on known skills. And none of them is something I am in need right now. Therefore I put all the skill crystals in a coin pouch, and then hide the coin pouch under my shirt.

I have only 2 pemadra points left. I’ll get one more [Merchant Tool Crate] and then it is zero. I got a wooden sheave and a big metal hook along with some junk. Done!

By the time I finish sorting my loot it is already a night of full moon. With this much moonlight, we monsters are seeing just fine. Without some color, but for predators, it is a night for hunting. I acquire a glimpse on the legend of the werewolf. Were the werewolf a monster, it makes sense for it to act on a full moon night.

I sit next to the sleeping Shraaizar, she instinctively wraps her tail around me, to get some warmth. I pat her head, and run my hand over her spiny frills. They are sharp, but beautiful. The way the light makes the scales shine make them even more beautiful.

Some monkeys climb on trees, the GBT bunch up to escape the cold of the night, now that they (d)evolved into pink burly monkeys. I told them to never again eat without sharing food.

I am almost going to sleep, then some disembodied semi-transparent white head appears in front of me, scaring me to the bone.

“Why are you going to sleep?!?!?! Why won’t you use the golden ticket??? Why must you waste time playing with junk and monkeys all day long, instead of using the golden ticket???” It frets around, glaring daggers at me. “WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!”

What is this? A ghost? It is not scary. It sounds like a brat.

"Who are you? And why are you just a head? Calm down. Do you want me to use the golden ticket that much?" - I have to be wary here. And since it is a template where these kind of beings can read thoughts, I won't insult it either.

"Ohh, you are a smart one." it giggles. Brat. "Even though you are a troll."

"C'mon, you know who I am. I'm not a troll."

"Indeed. But then, active the golden ticket now."

"Heh, I don't know. See, I am postponing the use of the ticket because I need more information about it. Like what is the loot table."

"Loot table... Loot table, wait a minute..." The head bobs up and down, and seems distracted. It looks elsewhere with blank eyes, like someone talking on the phone.

After a few minutes, it comes back.

"Loot table. Yes, it is here. Use it now." I'm not getting rushed here. I'm in control.

"Show me. What this ticket gives? What are the odds?"

"It gives skills! You like skills, don't you?"

"Yeah, pretty much. So, show me the table."

- [Appraisal Emperor]

- [Emperor's Might]

- [King's Endurance]

- [King's Magic Aegis]

- [King's Roar]

- [King's Item Box]

- [King's Map]

- [Spatial Warp Magic]

- [Dual Job]

Oh, nice. Really nice. The head beams a huge smile as I get very interested in those skills... Emperor and King grade skills, and some of them are really worth having. I want it.

"Hey, kid, what is this skill here ??"

"It is because you don't meet the requirements for it. Yet." it pauses for a while, then continues. "Look forward to it. It is really nice. It is the lower ranked one in the list, but really nice synergy."

Sold. I take out the ticket from my purse, and look at it. Ticket begins to glow. "So how do I use it?"

"Just concentrate on it."

"I focus on the ticket, and the glow gets brighter, until it envelops the world. And then..."