Authors Note: At the bottom of this chapter there is an optional QA in the form of a cool exchange that I had with a reader earlier today.

I really liked it, because it also serves as somewhat of an introduction to me, the author, what my background is, as well as what my strengths and weaknesses might be.

I probably could have forced myself to get up and move around, but it didn’t seem like a good idea at the moment. Lord Runax had several servants come and place me on a stretcher, all the while assuring me that everything was fine and that he believed me now. He ordered someone to prepare a room for me, and then proclaimed that he would give gold to everyone who witnessed this event if they swore to remain silent – he said it was a matter of utmost importance to House Flameward, and that it was imperative that news of what happened here today be contained.

At that point my exhaustion was starting to overwhelm my adrenaline, and since I seemed to be safe for the moment I went online and sent a few messages to Wolfram, then relaxed and let sleep claim me

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I woke up floating on a cloud… no, wait… was this a waterbed? What the hell… I had no idea how it was possible for a people so primitive to have a bed this comfortable. I rolled over with great difficulty (the price of comfort, I suppose) trying to reach the edge of the bed… it was so soft and yielding that I almost felt like I was trapped in a warm bank of snow, or maybe one of those foam pits you see gymnasts using.

I was sweating slightly by the time I had freed myself, looking back at the bed that dominated the room: It was taller than I was, and by now I could tell that it wasn’t a waterbed; it was a massive mattress stuffed full of some kind of soft fur or down. I wasn’t wearing my own clothes, and I could see bandages applied over the areas that had been scraped raw on the stone circle of the Arena. Why the hell would you make it out of stone, anyway – dirt or grass would be far softer!

I examined the room I was in, which was just slightly smaller than our entire house back in North Stone Village. It was richly decorated, the walls nearly covered with colorful tapestries of dozens of different kinds of beasts I had never seen before all engaged in battle (and losing) against warriors wearing the colors of House Flameward. There were wardrobes and other pieces of furniture arranged around the room, almost hiding the figure of a young girl with horns similar to mine kneeling on the floor. Wait… what!?

I did a double take, taking a half step back when the girl moved slightly. Ok, so she wasn’t an incredibly detailed statue then. She looked to be about my age, maybe a few years older at most, and she was quite stunning with her shining silver colored skin. I took a step closer to her, “Umm, hello?” I said cautiously.

She still didn’t look up. “Are you awake now?” She asked.

I wasn’t sure how to respond… so I didn’t. But I took another step closer to her after noticing that she didn’t have silver skin, she had silver scales! Her horns were shaped very similarly to mine, and while her scales looked to be smaller and finer than mine – my scales were rather well defined and easy to notice, even from a distance – she was the first other person who had the same appearance as me. Well, ok, maybe I was forest green and she was sterling silver, but aside from that we looked very similar.

“Well, are you awake or not!” She asked again, sounding slightly exasperated this time.

I felt foolish even answering such a stupid question, but I decided to risk it anyway. “Uhh. Yes. My name is Heller, nice to meet you.”

She looked up at me with a fierce gaze. “Finally!” She said, standing up. “Toad told me that as punishment I had to stay here and not look up until you were awake.” She didn’t actually say ‘toad’, but the pest she described looked a LOT like a squat black frog from back on Earth, so I always thought of them as toads or frogs. The girl stretched out her shoulders and rubbed her knees. She was wearing a white and blue servant’s outfit, and for some reason I thought it looked amazing on her.

“Punishment?” I asked in surprise, “Why would he punish you?” I was having a hard time imagining anyone getting mad at her.

“For calling him Toad, you beast-brained oaf, what do you think?” She said, frowning at me. Ah, ok, I could see someone getting mad at her now. But I merely smiled, her comment instantly making me think of mother… which then made me start to wonder how my parents were doing.

I was startled as the servant girl suddenly clapped her hands right in front of my face. “Hellooo! I’m talking to you!” She said. I must have spaced out for a moment thinking about home.

“Oh, right. Well you never gave me your name, so I have decided to ignore you.” I said to her, just to see what kind of reaction I would get. I had sometimes seen Jaws bait mother in a similar fashion (though not very often, as that wouldn’t have been very safe), and it was the first thing that came to mind.

The girl paused, opening her eyes wide for a moment before stuttering, “Wha… oh, I’m Tetra…” She seemed thrown off of her game, and I suspect I might have seen her blush if it wasn’t for the scales (being blush-proof was one of the nicer quirks that came with being ‘differently-skinned’).

I smiled at her reaction and gave her a respectful salute (which is what we use in place of a bow). “It is a pleasure to meet you, Tetra. So why would that beast-brained Toad want you in here in the first place?”

She returned my salute and rewarded my reuse of her insult with a dazzling smile, “Nice to meet you too… Heller, right?” She nodded her head over to the door. “I’m supposed to go and summon Lord Runax Toad-Face as soon as you are awake, ‘and not a second later’.” She quoted, tucking in her chin and stretching her mouth out wide.

I couldn’t help but laugh, and we were still chuckling when the door suddenly burst open, “Tetra!” Said Lord Runax in a harsh voice, causing both of us to jump like guilty children (… which is exactly what we were). “Go to the kitchen immediately, and we will speak later about you minding your duties!”

Tetra let out a frightened squeak and ran towards the door just as I started to say, “I told her to stay here! It’s not her fault!” in an attempt to make her seem innocent (…and maybe to earn another smile later on). I didn’t see if she heard what I said as she slammed the door shut behind her, leaving me alone with Lord Runax.

He smiled at me, his ire at Tetra vanishing as quickly as it arrived. “Ah, young Heller! So good to see you awake and well!” I stared at him, abruptly feeling like he going to try and sell me a bridge (with extra snake oil!).

He continued with another wide mouthed grin, “I have excellent news for you!” He paused, waiting for me to take the bait. I decided not to play his game.

“Have you released my parents yet?” I asked, trying to gain the upper hand in whatever negotiations were coming next. The village was not very far from the Garrison (and the attached Academy), and judging how rested I felt I must have slept through the night already.

“Yes, and I already gave them the good news!” He beamed at me. “You have been given special permission to attend Academy five years early!”

I blinked at him, not at all certain that this news was actually ‘good’. He was too enthusiastic about all this, making me think that he had a hidden agenda which benefited him more than it would benefit me.

Authors Note2: Here is the post which I am using as a QA! Again, completely optional. I received permission from user wohlzy to post this here, but of course I'll remove it if asked. ;D

Hopefully it isn't too hard to read, and helps some people enjoy the story a bit more. :)

04/01/2016 19:25:00entityUNKNOWN Wrote: [ -> ]

04/01/2016 19:13:42wohlzy Wrote: [ -> ]

04/01/2016 18:48:01entityUNKNOWN Wrote: [ -> ]

04/01/2016 09:45:54wohlzy Wrote: [ -> ]

Yeah it is realy different from most of the MC in other story, The feeling i got is that it seem he hasn't progressed 'a lot' during the time he was in this new world. I don't know if it's related to the fact that there are already 35 chapters in the story or only 5 years in the time line.

The way the fight was described feel like it's the first time he was using his abilities even in the years he had them and if I add this to the fact that there was beast's attack in his village a few times I expected him to have tried a few things with his powers considering the dangers of the new world and the need to protect himself and his family. It's like he was just staying passive the whole time (and even if I understand he is still in a kid's body it still feel like he just did the bare minimum)

I mean he was able to do things since he was 1 year old so what he did during 4 years feel a bit 'small'. If you play a game for 4 years everyday then you are bond to be quite good at it and for a former adult that is described as quite the gamer to even just have a 'not complete' status screen when he said it take like a few minutes to change it is weird (In my opinion).

Another thing, he said a few chapters back that he met the Merrick when he was 1 year old (at that time he wasn't talking and was 'playing' the baby act) and nobody is surprised that he is able to remember what happened when he was 1 y.o I would be way more suspicious than them.

As for the fight, the hunter said he was a mighty fighter and all (don't know if it was self-praising) but the fact that the 5 yo kid beat him quite easily make all the people in this world look... quite weak. You (author) don't have to be afraid to make the MC look a bit op as long as you keep a good balance with this world's level of power.

Anyway I wanted to be at the last updated chapter to make my small 'review' of the story.

At the moment I still don't know if i have a refreshing feeling with the story or if I feel 'annoyed' by some things and contradiction.

You're still a new author (And i'm not an author myself not am I good at judging) so i'll keep reading the story and see how you improve. :)

Hey there. ;) First of all, thanks for reading.

I have to say I feel like you may have missed a lot of the more subtle points of the story. I'm not saying you should read it again, but most things commented on were actually explained in the text at one point or another. For example:

1) Yes he has had his 'powers' for a few years. He is good at using them, can actively shield or zap a moving opponent. Neither of these are easy feats!

2) There has only been ONE beast attack since the shadow wolves came, and he was with his parents the whole time. Someone would have noticed if he started zapping things. He isn't stupid enough to want to display his powers while still trapped in such a young body.

3) He has a cultivation technique given to him by an otherworldly being. The scope of this story is also a lot bigger than is being shown here, but there are very good reasons he was able to defeat a fully grown man.

4) It's pretty well known that he's a genius child by this point, so him remembering something from four years ago, while shocking, isn't nearly as surprising as WHAT he remembered.

5) I'm a new author, but I'm a veteran game master and know how to build a plot and a world very well. It's something I've been doing for more than 20 years, so while my writing might not be excellent, the story its self will be detailed and well thought out, if only because I've been doing it for so long.

So, have some faith on that level, at the very least. I might miss some things, but not things as basic as are being pointed out here. :D

Alright then ! I'll trust you, Thank you for the time you took to answer me.

As i said i'm going to keep reading the story (and even re-read from the beginning to better understand the things you pointed)

I have the bad habit to point the things i find confusing more than praising so just think that all the thing i don't talk about is because I like them. And if you think I was bashing then I'm sorry because that wasn't the intention :)

Anyway thanks for your work and keep it coming :)

Thank you! That means a lot to me actually. I always get a bit down as a game-master when players question the story, but lucky all my players know me well enough to trust that there is a reason for nearly everything by now. :D Still, when I get new players there is often a 'break-in' period where they have to learn to trust the GM, lol.

So there you have it. I am a new author, and this is the first time I have ever tried writing out a story/book. HOWEVER, I have a LOT of experience with world-building as a game master over the years, so plot and such are NOT something I am an amateur at.

It's the getting the plot down on 'paper' that I am struggling with, lol.

So thank you all for your comments, because they do really help me improve as a writer!

And there have been 2 instances so far where I have actually modified the story because I like YOUR ideas better than what I had planned. :D I won't say what they were, but a good GM always takes input from the players (readers) if it makes the story better.

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