《How to get lost: a wanderers guide》Day 4: Look! in the sky it's... the heck is that?
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Hello again! Big news! I am out of the caves!
Yes, I wandered mightily today, and followed a breeze right to the wonderous wilds outside. Of course there were some adventures along the way. Well, I think they could be called adventures at least, and I don't see anyone around to argue that fact with me.
Some were less dangerous then they were terrifying. Like the sneak-squeaks. They sneak and they squeak, hence the name. Darn things can fly! I was wandering through a small cave, just minding my own business and looking for a not-not to eat. When out of the black comes a shrill echoing squeak.
I reflexedly shrieked and froze. Before I could even begin to consider the consequences of both alerting some thing to my position, and then standing perfectly still. Those consequences came to me. I was surrounded. Dozens of soft wings flitting and battering at me. Shrill squeaks and nipping teeth woke me from my terror induced stupor.
Barely visible small bodies filled my vision, and I started swatting wildly at the creature filled air. Thankfully the sneak-squeaks are not sturdy. A single well placed swing and they fled. Leaving a pair of unlucky sneak-squeaks writhing in the sand behind them.
Breakfast was served, but they are very stringy. Not my favorite. Which is fair, considering I've only ever eaten one other thing. That was a rather mixed start to todays adventures in my opinion.
I did learn how to spit fire out of my mouth today as well. The trick is to hold the buzz under your tongue and then whistle. Also, I learned how to whistle.
Truthfully, I was whistling a happy bit of randomness when I happened to blow a crimson streamer of wonderful fire into the air. It's a nice little trick. Because now I can burn things that are outside arms reach. Which is an ability that quickly showed its usefulness.
Because the next critters I stumbled upon were something I had no desire to touch. Sadly, the eight legged monstrosities seemed more than willing to scuttle all over me. Which was a bad thing, since they were almost as long as I was tall and stood at about hip height. The first one I saw was a nasty surprise.
But I managed to kill it with fire. The second one saw me before I saw it, and the first clue I had to its lurking about was a pain in my ass. Damn thing bit me in the butt! Then everything got much, much, worse. My body locked up and I collapsed face first into the dirt. The freaky thing, which I am still struggling to name, grabbed me by the feet and started dragging me somewhere.
When I stopped being dragged (drug? drugged? whatever). When I stopped being yanked about by a monster with too many eyes and legs I was somewhat relieved, and took the chance to spit out all the sand that had drifted into my mouth when I tried to scream.
My mouth still feels gritty.
Then the world shifted, and I soon found myself dangling from the ceiling. Suspended by something I couldn't bend my neck to see. I couldn't feel anything but my face, and that was a little numb as well. But when the damnable creature responsible for my discomfort scuttle back into view I made a concerted effort to run the fuck away. Because it was accompanied by dozens of its presumed brood.
It didn't work. The running away I mean. So I moved onto plan Z. Whistle viciously at my captors. Always a last resort in these sorts of situations. I think. Trying to work my numbed lips and tongue into any proper resemblance of whistling was a tortuously slow affair. But I guess I got points for trying, because my sputtering drooling numb lips still managed to send a ribbon of fire into the face(?) of the nearing horrors.
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Which they did not like. Not at all. So I dug deep, and sent more fire into their writhing bodies. That was roughly when the oddly white walls of my would-be prison caught some fire themselves. And with a *Whoomph* everything turned into fire. It was quite beautiful while it lasted.
Sadly it didn't last nearly as long as I had hoped.
But it was enough for me. The freaky monster things scrambled about, blinded and panicked by my flames. They seemed pretty flammable too. Soft hisses started filling the air around me. The hissing became louder and louder, until it became a near inaudible shriek. Followed by a series of sickening *pop-pop-pops* as the whole brood and their disgusting leader softly exploded into chunks.
A little while later I was sitting against the cave wall and laughing quietly to myself. Watching the last of the flames die down on the carcasses of the monsters that had nearly eaten me. Which is when I noticed the flames were guttering. Something about that caught my eye and mind.
So I snapped my fingers and brought fire to my hands. I watched the dancing red flames intently, and sure enough, they were catching a breeze. The slight breeze, too gentle for me to notice its touch, carried the fire in its flow. So I stumbled to my feet, and started shambling after the breeze.
As I followed the breeze my movements got easier as whatever that thing had stunned me with wore off. Pretty soon I started to see light. Real. natural, pure light. Something I had no memory of, but the sight of it filled me with vigor. I rushed onwards, and it started to get brighter and brighter. I was getting close, so I sped up again.
I took one final turn and came face to face with the blinding light of the world.
I had to close my eyes for a while until I could finally look directly at the source of all this wonderous light. A small but brilliant orb, burning yellow in the blue sky. As I looked at it my eyes tear up and my head started to ache.
There had been lots of things I knew without knowing how I knew them. I'd been letting my worries and questions fester since I had no way of answering them. It had been a grinding and insistent pressure on the back of my mind. How can know so much, words and writings, descriptors and describers, but nothing much else? I could describe a creature. But everything was new.
Now I felt something give in my head. I fell to my knees, I am not sure if I screamed from the blinding pain, but when I came to my throat was raw. I knew more. Nothing about me, sadly, but that yellow ball? Thats the Sun. That blue stuff all over everything? That's the Sky. I knew what things were.
Some things anyway. Still no idea who I am, or what those things in the cave are really called. But basic concepts. Ground, Sky, Sun, very basic stuff like that. Like those large brown and green things that filled the space between the sky and the ground. Those were trees, and when the cluster into a big group like this, they're a forest.
With that before me I looked behind. The yawning mouth of that cave gaped open it the stone behind me, and above that towered a single sky-piercing mountain. The mountain was slender and looked, odd. Not really sure why the first mountain I ever saw made me think this isn't what a mountain is supposed to look like. But it did.
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It had a curve to it, and it slowly and smoothly tapered to a point at its peak. It vaguely looked like the fangs those eight legged monsters had used to bite me in the butt. My butt wound has healed nicely, by the way. Barely noticable. I sent some Tingles to it and they seem to have helped immensely.
So, with no better idea then to simply go forward, I set off into the unknown forest before me. It didnt take long before I spotted all kinds of interesting new critters.
Like the fuzz-butt. It has a long fuzzy tail extending from its butt, and they scampered about the trees making a very annoying sound. Kind of a *chitter-chatter-chuuff* series of sounds. When a dozen or so of them start doing it in tandem it gets pretty aggravating.
Then there is the branch-brain that has branches coming out of its head and four feet that end in odd hard toenails. That guy grunted at me. I saw some branch-brains without the branches. Maybe they lost theirs? They move about the woods in elegant leaps and prances. It's rather fun chasing them, just to watch them elegantly run away.
I was having a pretty fun time exploring this bright and colorful new enviroment. Full of interesting new things. But I hadn't had anything to drink or eat in quite a while. Not since the sneak-squeaks this morning. I had refused to eat the eight legg- you know what? That's a pain to write. I'm gonna call them Leggers.
It works on two levels, they have loads of legs, and when you see one you want to leg it. Leggers!
So, determined to find some water at least, and hopefully some food too I started wandering around for looking for a river to get a drink. Which is when I spotted a very odd creature. It stood on two legs like me, but was very short and green. Little fella only came up to my knee. Did I mention it was green? Yes, yes I did. How do I erase stuff? I can't...
Moving on.
We saw each other at the same time, and the little green man came running right at me shrieking at the top of its lungs and waving about a small stone hatchet. Small to me at least no doubt it seemed a right fearsome battle axe to my diminutive aggressor.
Gotta admire his spirit, if not his brains.
I saw his charge and raised him a fire to ya face! More shrieking ensued, but of the panicked variety rather than the bloodthirsty. Snatching the hatchet from its weakened grasp I ended it as quickly as I could. Which is when I heard the rustling.
Turning around I saw a full dozen little green men. All holding stone tipped axes and spears. There were two heartbeats of silence as we all let the scene settle in our minds. Then, as one, I turned to run, and they charged at me shrieking bloody murder.
Can't blame them for that.
They were faster than me. So they caught up rather quickly, but I managed to keep them at arms length by wildly swinging my stolen hatchet. I also whistled up some fire, and sent it at them. That really freaked them out, but it was definitely a mistake.
First of all, whistling while running full tilt, and swinging a hatchet is extremely difficult. Secondly, looking backwards while running full tilt is just plain stupid. And they made sure to capitalize on my stupidity. One of them hurled its spear. In a mixed bag of luck it didn't stab me in my squishy bits, but it did fall between my legs. Tangling them, and sending me tripping at speed directly into a tree trunk.
Tree trunks are very solid things. Much more so than, say, a nose. So it should be no surprise that my nose was violently redirected by the unforgiving bark of the tree with a grinding *crunch*. Some luck was still on my side, since the sudden stop of all forward movement by me was completely unexpected by my foes. So they overshot me and had to scramble to get back in for the kill.
Which gave me time to stumble to my feet and plant said feet firmly on the ground. The first of the little green men came screaming out of the brush, and met my hatchet with his face. A solid click shot out, and he fell to the ground, dragging my weapon with him, buried in his face. So I snatched up his shoddy spear instead.
Three more came out two on the left one on the right, and I managed to wind up and deliver a sweeping smash to the two, before turning to hurriedly stab the third. I wasn't fast enough. My spearhead took him in the throat, and his took me in the gut.
I was already struggling to breathe throught the blood filling my nose and mouth. The two I'd batted were getting to their feet, and three more were rushing out of the woods at me. I was desperate, so I took the deepest breathe I could, and gather a riotus buzz of Tingles to my filling lungs. I had no Idea if this would work or not, but it could hardly make things worse.
I exhaled, blood and fire filled the air in front of me. The little green men started screaming. All five who I had been facing were on fire, two were screaming and rolling on the ground. The other three simply lay there, charred, in the dirt. The tree that had stopped my flight earlier smouldered slowly.
The last five came out of the forest, took one look at the devastation before me. I tried to look intimidating, which was hard to do when my body and mind ached sorely. And I guess I did a crap job too, becasue they gave yet another scream before swarming me.
I was carried to the ground under their combined weight, crushing one of them beneath me. Flimsy stone hatchets rose and fell, cutting into my arms and legs as I tried to punch and kick my way to freedom. I lost all sense beyond the fight, pain and anger and sound filled my world. Bones crushed under my fists and feet. The final little green man ended his life with my hand wrapped around his throat. Writhing and gasping until he finally fell still.
I collapsed, just laying there. Savoring in my painful victory. Finally I climbed slowly to my feet wincing and laughing at the madness of it all. I spent the next while plucking shards of stone from my wounds and sending Tingles to help heal them. I looked through the packs of my former enemies. The ones I hadn't immolated that is. Skunky dried meat and stale water in skins was my dinner today.
Then I sent Tingles to my nose. The tickling tingling sensation making me sneeze, which made my clearly broken nose punish me with a white hot spear of pain to the brain. I setted for a steady and slow heal there.
The sky has been changing. When I left the cave the sky was blue and the sun yellow. Now the sun has moved to the horizon, and it is red. While the sky is a beautiful series of shade, from vibrant red clouds near the sun. To purples and blues and onwards to blacks.
I think this is, night. Or the start of it. I don't know the significance of night. But I am exhausted. My energy dwindling alongside the dimming rays of the rapidly disappearing sun.
I climbed a tree, a large princely oak, for the night. It felt right.
As I sit here, writing this and watching my first sunset. Looking back on the struggles of the day. I smile, for I am still Alive.
Good night.
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